We lay there for a long time not saying a single word to each other, listening to the crickets nearby and feeling the cool breeze against our skin. It feels a little awkward but a good kind with just him here with me. I wait for him to say something, knowing that he would why else would he came out here.

His voice sounds so innocent and sweet, "You believe in Chinese Fortunes?"

I wasn't expecting that question but alright I will go with it, "I don't know that was my first one ha-ha, so I really don't know."

"Uhm...Well mine said something about my life being filled with magical moments, do you think this might be one of those moments?"

I smirk, "I don't know do you feel something magical happening?"

"Actually yeah, maybe."

"Really, how?" I just have to know what he sees that I don't.

"Well, first of all meeting you was kinda magical and a night like this sitting up here on the roof with the stars twinkling above and the sound of the crickets and the cool breeze that gives me a chill on my skin creating goose-bumps." He pauses for a second and points up at the sky and says, "And look there's a shooting star, like that rarely happens right. Could be magical don't ya think?"

"Actually shooting stars happen quite often, you just rarely catch it action." I smile.

"Kill the magic why don't you." He teases, nudging me with his elbow.

"Sorry, I'm just stating the facts here."

"Yeah, yeah but it is kinda magical, I think seeing it with you anyway."

I take a deep breath and roll my eyes, this guy is crazy.

"Well, I have you to know that I think that they are true. I want to believe that they do anyway and I really believe what yours said was pretty accurate."

"Really now, I guess you would say that now wouldn't you."

"Look I'm just saying you gotta conquer your fears or they will conquer you." He recalls what the fortune had said.

"I get it, I really do, it's just..." I get really quite for a moment and take a deep breath trying to hold back the tears. I decide to change the subject and whisper, "I saw my mom today."

"Oh! And how did that go?"

"She called me a lying bitch, in front of the whole freakin' court room."

"Ouch!"

"I just don't get it, why can't she believe me. I'm her daughter, her flesh and blood. I mean what the heck."

"That has to suck."

"It infuriates me, she believes him over me, why I just don't get it."

"I can't answer that; I wish I could but I can't." He takes my hand in his, letting his fingers glide back and forth over mine.

"Hayden, I spilled out my guts to her. I told her practically everything. What that monster did and she looked at me as if I was a stranger, me, her daughter. And to beat it all, guess what?"

"Do I dare ask....What?"

"He was there too, my dad. He was there in the back of the room and didn't have the balls to talk to me. Nope not even a, 'hey how's it going kiddo'."

"Ouch! You got to be kidding me."

"Nope. He stood up and looked at me, right in my eyes and turned and walked out. I thought maybe he might be waiting outside in the hall, but that was a joke, he was nowhere to be seen. I don't know maybe it was just a figment of my imagination, maybe I just wished that he was there."

"Damn what the hell. He comes up there to see the trial and doesn't have the balls to tell his own daughter hi."

"Yeah, like for real right. I wonder why he was there. He hasn't been there for us in years why now?"

"Well the news of the murder is all over the networks on TV, internet and in the newspapers, maybe he seen it or maybe the authorities got a hold of him and said that he needed to be there. You guys are all under the age of eighteen, I mean if your mom is not capable of taking care of you maybe the state wants ya'll to live with your dad."

I let that sink in for a second, living with dad. Well for starters that was not an option. He left us behind with her and started another family, his family and there was no way she would want the four of us there. I wonder what it would be like though. I'm sure it would be super awkward.

Hayden nudges me again, "Star what are you thinking about?"

"My dad." I glance over at Hayden and then roll over to my side to face him. "I couldn't imagine living with him. He has a new family. He remarried not to long after he left momma, to some woman named Isabella and they have two kids that I know of anyway." I let the memories flood my brain of us together, the way it used to be before Isabella came along.

"I always thought that I was my dad's favorite you know. My dad and I would lay outside on nights like this and look up at the stars. He would point to the biggest star in the sky and tell me that was my star he would say, 'you see that star, that one over there, the big one twinkling that is your star; you should make a wish.' And I would. When he left I kept looking up at the stars at night and wished with all my might that he would come back. Wished that he would save me and take me away from her and from Jackson. Those wishes never came true; I was stuck with momma and that monster."

Hayden never says a word; he listens contently and holds my hand, every now and then he looks up at me.

"I don't know if I want to live with him now after all these years. He could have had us a long time ago but he didn't want us he threw us away like trash, like we didn't mean anything to him. There is no way that I could go with him especially if he is being forced to take us in, not like that you know. I want him to actually want us."

"I understand that for sure." He squeezes my hand a little tighter. "But it could be a good thing living with him again; I mean maybe it could if you gave it a try."

"Maybe, but after seeing him today the way he looked at me." Now the tears fall down my cheek, dammit why now.

Hayden rolls over then all the way to face me; he takes his other hand and wipes the tears from my face. "Lib, don't cry, it hurts to see you this way. You don't know what he was thinking and he didn't have the opportunity to talk to you. Maybe he will be there again and ya'll could talk."

"Maybe, a part of me wants to talk to him, and the other part doesn't want to have anything to do with him. I'm still so mad at him; he hurt us to in a way because he gave up on us."

We roll back to our backs and look up at the sky a few more clouds had rolled in.

"All of this is so freakin' hard being away from them is driving me crazy; I don't know how much more I can take. I miss them so much and they are keeping us away from each other. If I had to make a wish tonight, it would be to see them, just to hold them even if it was only for a millisecond. Sunday is Rivers birthday. It will be his first birthday ever being alone. Could you imagine being ten and all alone on your birthday? Do you think where he is they will celebrate it? How sad it would be not to have a cake or a candle or presents. I don't even want to think about it."

"Not that we had elaborate birthdays with momma. I would use the little money I had to by cake mix and sometimes we had icing and sometimes we didn't. The candle we used was used every year for all of us until it was too small to light and then I would search for another one. Most of the time in the trash at the park after someone else had a party; I would dig out candles and left over wrapping paper and save for one our birthdays. Our presents were always drawings that we made or a craft that we came up with. Sometimes we would find old toys in the trash, take them home and clean them up, most of them needed batteries that we did not have and could not afford. Our presents were nothing spectacular but at least it was a little something, you know." I totally can't believe I just said that to him, oh my God, I have never told anyone that.

"Wow sounds like you had it covered."

"Yeah, I tried. Storm helped out when he could. He started mowing yards and doing work around people's houses to make a little bit of money. We use to keep all our money in a jar and hid it in our room for days like, birthdays and Christmas. Until Jackson found where we were hiding it, he took every dime of our money. We know he took it. Storm got super mad and they had it out. In the end Storm got a black eye out of it and a broken jar where the money had been. Jackson and momma got drunk on a bottle of whisky."

"After that we hid the money in the ground in one of the neighbor's yard behind a shed. There were lots of trees but Storm engraved a small x on the one tree where we buried the money. We wanted to make sure that Jackson or momma would never get our money again."

"Jackson sounds like a piece of shit, if you ask me."

"Oh, he was a major pain in the ass. I don't know what momma ever saw in him."

It's getting really late and I had already yawned several times. I didn't want to leave his side. I was getting ready to tell Hayden good night when he puts his arm under my head and moves in closer to me. I am so close to him, I can smell the sweet scent on his skin from his shower. I let my head fall to his chest. Maybe a few seconds would do no harm, however I fall asleep listening to the sound of his heart beating.