Me: oh yah guess what
Mom: you suggest a dance I know. If it happens we'll pick you out a nice dress some nice heels
Me: I don't want to wear a dress though, I want to wear a tux
Mom: Ok you can grow up and be a lesbian but girls don't wear tuxes they wear dresses and heels
Me...
Me on the inside: how can you be my mom, just how...

My mom actually told me that...