▽Modern AU

△Levi x Dead!Reader

△she

(Kudos to @lucas_ashton_laston for all the love❤️)

(Did I use kudos right?😂)

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Levi POV

It doesn't smell like her anymore.

The teal scarf you left behind, it was now completely void of your scent. It (your scent) used to bring me a sense of security, but now it only gives me the feeling of being lost. Which it has never done before, but as the current circumstances stands, it didn't really came as something shocking.

What did she even smell like again?

I couldn't remember.

One of a kind — I remember that was what I always thought about your scent.

They say everyone has their own unique body smell. I never used to believe it because everyone was either wearing the same perfume/cologne, has no scent, or they smell — until you waltz along into my senses. You didn't smell like chemicals infused together to create a specific stimuli, you didn't smell like nothing, and you definitely didn't smell but instead, you smelt like something that could only be owned by you.

That's what intrigued me the most, because I couldn't put a finger on it.

It was a delightful scent, one where it could put any person with an anger issue like mine into a state of calmness. I used to think how blessed I was to have found my perfect remedy, but now all it does it just haunt me.

I can't remember it.

No matter how hard I tried to recreate it, to remember it, or find a fragment of a clue to its ingredients — the gods forbade me to relive it.

I miss it.

I stared at your scarf around my neck.

It's always around my neck ; during the Spring, when I go to the beach on the Summer because of how everyone would just relentlessly drag me there as an act to take you off my mind, during mid-Winter when it's freezing, and especially all-round Autumn. I feel that if I do take it off other than for wash, I would feel even more lost than I do now because this is all that I have left of you.

I should feel something when I look at this scarf though, right?

Something joyful like a flashing memory or your smile?

I should feel something other than a sense of lost...right?

I miss her.

Lowering my eyelids until all my sight was covered in darkness and the after effects of my view, I sat on the portable chair in front of you in an effort to relax as I took in a breath of chemicals from my cigarette.

You never did like it when I smoke, you said it was killing me to which I always scoff at.

I'm definitely late for work.

I didn't care though.

I stopped years ago, and so did Erwin (my boss).

"(Name)?" I called out for her from the shaded hallway.

"Here!" I heard her voice shout from the nearby break room.

"The documents, where are they?" I asked as I leaned against the door while secretly taking in her beauty for the day. Her (h/c) hair was in a neat pony tail that day and she wore red on her lips, the type that I would want to smack off of.

"I handed them to Mr. Smith, sir. " her ruby lips moved upwards to make a breath-taking smile as her eyes follows suit with a little crinkle.

I nodded at her with a stern expression and left with a little more joy in my steps.

The memory of your little smile had granted electricity into the constant dull heart ache that was spreading throughout me right now, like a wild fire in the woods.

"Levi Ackerman! You didn't!!" She shouted in disbelief as she stared wide-eyed at me—the cleanest man in the world—who had just slathered a whole bunch of whipped cream on her cheek.

I hummed deviously with slit eyes and a smirk as I inch closer to her sugar coated cheek, but just as I was about to lick it off, she dotted my nose with the same cream I used on her.

Her heavenly giggles resonated throughout the house while I just stood there, shocked and mildly disgusted at the substance on my skin. That is, until my hand had somehow automatically grabbed a whole lot of cream and slapped it onto her apron. Her giggles instantly stopped as a gasp ripped through.

After the passing of her initial shock, she smirked at me and that's when it progressed into the messiest whipped cream fight I've ever had.

In the end, we spent the whole day fucking up the house and ourselves with sugar, and then had to clean it all up with her complaining about it for every damn minute of the way.

A small smile tugged on my lips as your joyous giggles replayed itself over and over again in my mind, until my delusional self had thought that I had legitimately heard it in real life.

Opening my eyes in a flash, I scoffed loudly at that theory, nearly spitting out my cigarette in the process my accident.

Something you would've snorted like an idiot at.

Get your head out of the clouds, idiot.

That was how being with you felt like though, as if I was in the high heavens. Like the ones in the sky, the same baby blue sky I'm staring at right now.

"Levi, I like you. "

I do too.

"Levi, that's going to kill you someday! "

I know.

"Levi, I can so cook! "

No, she couldn't.

"Levi, are you tired?"

Yes.

"Levi, more!"

As she wishes.

"Levi, you should eat more. "

I should.

"Levi?"

"Levi!"

"Levi?!"

"Levi. "

Frustration boiled beneath my very skin and in order to relief my urge to completely obliterate everything in my sight, my hands rakes through my hair in a violent manner, messing up it's neatness in the process.

"Levi, I love you. "

I hesitated and she teared up.

I hadn't mean to, but I just wasn't ready yet.

I wasn't ready to expose all of myself entirely as a vulnerable and broken soul as many questions of your loyalty and dependability ran through my head in a flash. So I had to make a choice, but I never got to as you had already ran out.

I heard the car engine rev up to which I assumed she was going to take a drive to calm her nerves down and recollect her thoughts.

Stop. Shut up!

I awaited for her return...

SHUT UP!

...but she never came back.

Hunching down into an unhealthy posture, my breathing was rapidly uneven as I gripped painfully at my own locks — ones that you loved to observe and play with.

A strangled yell escaped the confines of my vocal cords — one that would rival evenly to the roars of Zeus's bolts — as tears started to collect at my eyes, blurring the words engraved on your tombstone.

Words that I already memorized by heart.

I love you too, (Name).