"Don't Leave Me"

‼️WARNINGS‼️

•Season 1 Spoilers

•Mentions of Death

•Blood

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(Requested by: @_Storymaker_Fangirl_ )

Second Person POV

"You're hurting me!" You choke out through warm tears, trailing down your face as you stare at the one man who actually made you feel alive. Standing there in his office one evening, you can't begin to understand why now, all of a sudden, he no longer wants you. "Don't turn that blame on me, Y/n." His voice is irritated but he tries his best to keep his emotions together before they burst out of control. Sniffling as your red eyes continue to bore into the side of his face, not daring to look at your mess, you swallow a lump in your throat, taking a shaky breath afterwards. "T-Then why are you doing this to me?" You can't make your voice above a whisper but thankfully, he can still hear your distress.

"I never said I don't love you... I never fell out of love with you. Don't twist my words and say that I'm not." He sounds threatening but you ignore it, only seeing a good but hurt person behind those cool greys. "I-I love you, though... so why do this?" You sniffle again, holding back the urge to break down into a sobbing fit on his floor. The buildup is coming and you're aware of it, only using the last bit of self-control you have to maintain it. "I made the mistake of allowing myself to be vulnerable because I knew this would happen... the day where anything can change and I end up losing you when its out of my control. I'd rather it be my own choice... I don't want to lose you out there because I would hate myself until the day I die. I want you to be happy, Y/n... that's all this is." The raven tries to explain but none of it makes sense.

"I wish... w-we never met, Levi." The words slip past your tongue with ease. Caught off guard, the man before you slowly turns to face you, not expecting this. "What...?" He whispers with a confused look on his face. "T-That way we never had to go through this... it would be easier that way... right?" You think out loud. Sighing through his nose, Levi doesn't say a word, not even knowing how to respond to that in the first place. "This is t-oo easy for you so that already shows me your intentions." You hold your left arm, squeezing it when he doesn't look at you anymore. "G-Good luck out there, Captain." You mutter one last time, heading for the door to leave. Just as your palm rests on the handle, readying to turn it, the man behind you speaks up. "I wish we never met, cadet." His words float through your mind, more tears spilling from your eyes.

Biting your lip to hold back a cry, you quickly open the door and pull it shut behind you. Shuffling back to your dorm, you don't even make it ten feet before collapsing to the ground, a silent sob forcing its way out of your body. The man you loved for the past two years was ready to push you aside out of nowhere with hardly any attachment to it. It pains you more than you're showing, its almost killer. However, without the knowledge, you would never know that on the other side of that office door, he dropped his head in his hands the moment the door clicked shut. He felt stupid for sounding like an emotionless asshole, toying with your feelings. Hell, he already hated himself for doing it in the first place. He thought that letting you down now would be better in the long run than possibly losing you on the battlefield before he can get to you. Nothing scared him more than that.

~~

The next day, you're inside Wall Maria with the new recruits, on the 57th Expedition. You had requested for a position change at the last minute, not wanting to be around Levi because your emotions would distract you. Thankfully, Commander Erwin was understanding and didn't ask questions, finding it helpful for you to be with the newbies, anyway. Now, positioned with three boys named Reiner, Armin, and Jean, you find yourselves face-to-face with an abnormal, 15-meter Titan.

The abnormal jumps over your heads, causing the ground to shake when it lands. Everyone falls off their horses, knocking the wind out of you. Feeling your cheek, you notice blood on your fingers. Wiping it off with your sleeve, you recoil at the thought of Levi scolding you for dirtying your uniform. The thought him still hurts but this is exactly why you requested a change in position. As soon as you look up, you see the Titan lift up Armin's hood, looking at his face before getting up and running away. "What the hell was that all about...?" You mutter to yourself.

After losing a horse, another new recruit is able to bring a spare, allowing you and your group to continue forward, heading for the forest of large trees. Now, on watch for Titans and keeping them out of the forest, you quietly watch down below, noticing Titans approach. "As long as they're not entering, they're fine thinking we're the food." You tell your group, not caring if they think its ridiculous to not slaughter the Titans. You have to preserve as much gas as possible so now is the opportunity to do so. There's a tiny ounce of you that wonders how Levi is doing but you're quick to shut it down, not wanting to give him anymore of your energy.

Eventually, you hear a loud screech, causing you to cover your ears from the piercing ruckus. Immediately, the Titans below you storm the forest, forgetting you even exist. "Shit!" You curse, removing your hands from your ears to try and go after them. You know the abnormal Female Titan was captured and you have to try and keep it that way. The last thing you want to do is let your squad down.

Able to take down two of them, you have to retreat back to the trees, realizing they're too fast for you to keep up with, and only wasting your gas. "Our newest orders are to retreat back to headquarters!" Reiner shouts at you, already heading back to the horses. Nodding, you follow the rest of them to start heading back. It seems odd that you're ending the expedition early but you won't question your superior's decision too much.

Along the way, as you begin to meet up with other cadets, you hear murmurs of an entire squad being taken out. Catching a lump in your throat, it sounds terrifying, only imagining how awful it has to be, and wondering whose it was. The longer you ride, the more people start to talk about it. Eventually, you hear the very name itself be brought up. "Captain Levi's squad." You hear someone mention. Almost bringing your horse to a complete halt, Armin notices and grabs your wrist, shaking his head. "Keep moving forward!" He encourages you. Even though you're scared, you follow Armin's directions and stick with your squad, knowing better than to break formation and put yourself in the line of fire by turning around. As terrified and worried as you are, you keep pushing forward, headed for home.

Making it through the gates, you immediately jump off your horse, anxiously waiting nearby for any sign of Levi. The man may have broken your heart but you still deeply care for him. You would be even more crushed had he not made it home. Scanning each horse and injured cart passing by, your (color) eyes eventually land on the familiar raven, calling out for him. "Levi!" You shout, waving your arms over your head. Running out in front of the last few horses, the man hops off his own, jogging towards you with a bit of a limp. Meeting him in the middle, you crash into each other, arms tightly wrapping around the other, not wanting to let go.

"I thought I lost you out there..." You breathe out against him, heart pounding against your chest, feeling the man's own racing heartbeat. "I did too... I was so afraid, Y/n." He mumbles, not daring to let you go anytime soon. Tangling your fingers in his short, dark hair, you bury your nose in his neck, letting a few tears of relief slide by. Resting his hand on the back of your head, he guides you to sit on the ground, ignoring his injured ankle. "You're too hard to forget, Levi... I don't want this for us anymore." You whisper against his skin. Swallowing, the man nods gently. "I don't either... I'm sorry I hurt you, Y/n. I was afraid it would hurt more to lose you had I not let you go beforehand. It hurts just as bad either way... but I'm grateful to have you back for a second chance." He whispers back, holding you close and tight.

"I wanna go home..." You mumble, tears eventually ceasing. "And take care of your injury." You add, catching him off guard. "How did you know...?" He pulls back enough to look at you. "Because you're never good at hiding physical pain." You answer quietly with a small grin, returning the gaze. "Let's go home, then... and forget today happened while we can." He offers, pulling you up. Once standing, he gently presses his lips against your forehead, all of the previous night's guilt building up again. He hated seeing you so upset because of him. He would spend the next few months trying to make it up to you for his mistake. Never letting go, you smile at the familiar sensation of his lips, moving so you can steal them with your own, a hand falling from his hair to cup his cheek.

Once you pull away, his eyes gloss over your face as the evening sun glows over your skin, making it shine. Noticing the cut on your cheek from earlier, he carefully wipes off the dried blood with his thumb, not minding the mess. "Let's get you cleaned and bandaged too." He whispers, pulling you back into his embrace one last time before officially heading back to headquarters.

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A bit of a short chapter and I went based off of memory for the expedition 💀

Also, this was a bit inspired by the song "Lie to Me," by 5SOS. Its addictive.

I hope you enjoyed this short, little angst to fluff! I miss writing due to my busy school schedule but I love updating when I can! Always feel free to add more requests and I'll get to them when I can. I try to chip away at them when I find the time. Until the next chapter!

~AlpineBreadStick