~Jiyong~

"Who's Seungri?" Seunghyun questions cautiously.

My body tenses and my chest tightens to the point of almost being painful. I had no idea why, but i never expected this to come up with Seunghyun, i guess in the back of my mind i knew i would have to explain one day. Seungri was to big of a part of my life for it not to come up. Still though, i was shocked to actually hear this question come from his lips.

"H-he... i-i, you see.." i stumble trying to answer the best i can, but the words just won't seem to come out. I've never had to explain this before, everyone around me already knows who Seungri is, and i've never had to talk about it. Even Dr. Park never makes me talk about him, and i'm thankful for it because i understand now, it's a lot harder talking about my brother than i've ever imagined. "h-he's my brother" i whisper and let my eyes fall to the bed.

"Oh, another sibling, is he older? Does he go to collage like Kyuhyun and that's why i haven't met him?" Seunghyun asks not seeming to grasp my struggle.

I shake my head "no, Seungri isn't... here anymore"

"Here? what do you..." he breaks of mid sentence, finally grasping what i was trying to tell him.

"Oh.. i'm sorry Ji. I didn't know, you've never talked about him before." His face is once again riddled with guilt over something he didn't do.

Suddenly i'm caught up on a feeling of wanting to tell Seunghyun everything, about Seungri, about what it was like growing up together, about how much i love him. I have never once wanted to talk about Seungri, not because i didn't trust anyone enough to talk about it, but because it was to painful to talk about. I have also come to recognize, that my dislike for talking about Seungri was because i have this weird selfish, possessiveness over him. Who he really is, the person that comes out when we were alone.

No one knew Seungri like i did, in school he was quiet and reserved, and he kind of faded into the background, refusing to make waves. But when it was just us, on our rooftop hideaway, Seungri was a completely different person and i want to keep that person to myself, hide him away from the rest of the world, keeping him locked inside my heart and head, where no one can touch him, where no one can damage my beautiful innocent boy. But Seunghyun, as always, is different. I want to tell him about Seungri, i want him to know who Seungri really was, and i want him to love him as much as i do.

"Seungri and i grew up together, we were the product of our fathers first marriage, the one before he married Hwa Yun and started another family" I specify.

Seunghyun breaths in finally understanding, and i swear i can almost see the pieces literally clicking together in his head. "Did he... was he like you?"

I swallow the thickness in my throat that has slowly started to form, and I lick my overly dry lips. "Yes, he was abused just like me."

He reaches out and places a hand over mine. "You don't have to talk abut him if it's hard for you."

I feel the corner of my lips twitch. "No, i want to tell you Seung."

Seunghyun squeezes my hand and gives me an encouraging nod. "Okay, then i'm listening."

I prepare myself, taking in all of the oxygen that i need to clear my head, then clearing my throat of any thickness that had been building up, before i begin "Seungri's a couple of years younger than me, so when we were little, i kind of always took care of him, taking over the role that my mother had failed to fulfill. So i guess by the time we were teenagers, i kind of forged this parental love for him... for as long as i can remember it was just him and me. We laughed when the other laughed, we cried when the other cried, and was the only thing that held importance to each other. Seungri knows me better than anyone, and i know him the same. It was an 'us against the world' type of relationship, you know?" Seunghyun smiles and nods telling me that he understands, prompting me to continue. "When my stepfather started beating us at a young age, i always stepped in to take the punishments meant for Seungri until he got older and made me stop. I even took the sexual abuse so Seungri wouldn't have to. I always promised him that i would take care of him, and that i would always protect him... but i guess i failed in that." i stop and look up to find Seunghyun staring at me, listening intently to what i was saying. I know he has a habit of seeing red and tuning out when i start talking about my stepfather and the things he did to us.

I continue, not really talking about anything in particular, just explaining the person he was "Seungri was a bit of a goofball, he would always get these hyper moments where he would run around talking about random things that didn't really make sense to anyone but me. I, of course couldn't let him do this anywhere but the roof, just in case he pissed our stepfather off." I laugh at the memories of Seungri jumping around on the roof talking to me about the random thoughts that always popped into his head.

"The roof?" Seunghyun's asks pulling me away from my memories.

I smile fondly "The roof on top of our old apartment building, it was kind of hard to get to, you had to go through a small wooden door behind the stairs that led to a latter... So our stepfather didn't really know where we went most of the time. It was our special place, a place we went that had almost magical powers. We were happy up there, away from the rest of the world. We would just spend hours talking about the type of life we would have when we finally turned old enough to leave. I told him that the minute i turned eighteen i would take him away from that hell, and that we would finally be free. Just him and me together, the way we always wanted it." i felt a wetness on my cheek and was going to reach up to wipe it away but Seunghyun beat me to it.

"You really loved him, didn't you?" he brushes his fingers over my cheek, with a tenderness that makes me want to cry harder.

I nod. "He's everything to me. I don't think i could have made it as long as i did in that place if it wasn't for Seungri."

Sunghyun leans forward. "Even if i didn't know him, i can tell he was a great person... well if you love him this much, he had to have been."

I smile "he is."

"Will you tell me more about him?" Seunghyun asks and climbs on the bed next to me, pulling me into his arms.

"He had the biggest heart, always offering everyone he meets a huge, heartwarming smile. Seungri had a habit of making you feel like the most important person when you talked to him, and his energy and attitude made it physically impossible to hate him. I even think our stepfather hated hurting him sometimes, and even though Seungri would get hit, he still kept an optimistic view of the world. I always admired that, and that's one of the biggest reasons i kept moving forward, because he was the one standing behind me pushing me there."

Seunghyun rubs circles over my back, comforting me "i would of loved to have known him."

I smile. "He would have loved you, you two are actually a lot alike."

He chuckles into my hair. "i'm going to take that as one of the highest praises from you."

I giggle. "you should... Tae reminds me of him too. That childlike innocence and optimism he holds reminds me so much of Seungri."

"Is that why you hooked onto him so fast? Why you take care of him the way you do? Because he reminds you of your brother?" He asks, more pieces clicking together.

I sigh "i think that's what pulled me in, but once i got to know him, i realized i love Tae for many different reasons... they actually are quite different once i think about it, but i still love them both"

"Do you love me?" Seunghyun asks in a pouty tone.

I laugh. "You know i do."

"Say it." He prods poking my butt playfully.

"Sunghyun" i gasp and hit his arm. "Bad boy."

He makes another pouting face and leans in close to stare into my eyes. "But am i a cute bad boy?"

I roll my eyes at his playfulness. "Of course you're adorable, and its sickening."

He snorts. "Well if you need to throw up, warn me, so i don't have to watch you run out of the room thinking you're about to die again."

I feel my face flush. "Oh god, that's so embarrassing." i throw my face into my hands and try to bury my head into the pillows.

"Baby, come on, don't be embarrassed... we all puke, not as flawlessly as you do, but we all do." he jokes, attempting to pull me out of my soft cocoon i was now wrapped up in.

"I hate you." i say muffled by the pillows.

Seunghyun chuckles and kisses the top of my head "i love you too"

>>>>>

~Seunghyun~

"Boys" Hwa Yun peeks into the room pulling me out of my half sleep. I glance up and return her loving smile "breakfast is ready, do you want to wake him up or should i?" She motions to Ji, fast asleep in my arms.

I look down and can't help it when my lips spread wider "i got him, we'll be down in a bit."

She nods and gives us one more adoring look before leaving the room, closing the door behind her.

I lean down and nuzzle my face into Ji's neck, rewarding me with a groggy moan from the younger. I chuckle and place my lips against the sensitive skin, waking up the boy in my arms further.

"You know, this isn't a half bad way to wake up." He jokes with a sexy raspiness to his voice.

"I can think of better." i say into his neck, sending vibrations to the skin around my lips.

Ji shutters "oh really? What's better?"

"Well if you were out of this thing for one." i pull at the heavy sweater he had thrown back on after his shower.

Without a moment of hesitation he reaches down and pulls the sweater over his head, throwing it to the edge of the bed "now is it how you envisioned it?"

I stare at Ji's arms, i had never seen him show this much skin before, and his snow white, flawless skin is beautiful. I jump over from his neck and place a kiss of his bicep and he giggles at me, making my body tingle over that sound "actually, you were a bit more undressed than this." i joke, continuing to places kisses down his arms.

His breath hitches, all of the color draining from his face. "i can't go further than this Seunghyun, not yet."

I look up at him "i know, and this is more than i would have ever asked for, but you can't blame a guy for having fantasies."

A bright red graces his ghostly cheeks once again, pulling a sense of relief into me. "am i always in your fantasies?"

It was my turn to feel that heat spread over my face "you are my fantasy, Ji."

The room suddenly becomes thick with sexual tension and withheld desire. Our eyes lock and i know his thoughts are mimicking mine, we want each other in ways we can't really explain, in ways that doesn't really need to be said. Once again my willpower is being tested and once again i'm tempted to tell my will power to fuck off. I want my Ji so bad, i want him in my arms a trembling, moaning mess. I want to see his cheeks flush in pleasure not embarrassment, and i want to see his eyes etched with lust and satisfaction. This burning need and want worries me though, i wouldn't be able to live with myself if one day i forced Ji into something he wasn't ready for and in turn adding to his emotional scars.

"I should probably leave the room before this goes places we're not ready for." my voice is barley above a whisper but i know he hears me.

"Or you can stay and see how far i can push myself" Ji says, and i look into his eyes to see Ji looking back. None of that innocent, needy being that took over my boyfriend before, but Ji, my Ji. I know he means it, but i still can't bring myself to trust his judgment when it comes to us being intimate.

I lean away from him "Ji, don't push it." i warn.

Ji abruptly sits up and climbs onto my lap, with his legs straddling both of mine. His facial features are set in a look of determination and stubbornness making it clear that he wasn't going to let this go easily "i want to love you completely Seunghyun, i want to give myself over to you completely and the only way we are ever going to get there is if we start working on it"

I blink at him, wide eyed "Ji, i don't want to lose you."

Ji's face softens but still holds resolve "you won't Seunghyun,. I promised you that i will always come back to you, no matter what happens i will always find my way home." he places his head on my chest. "Please, i need to try, i need to know how deep this goes."

I sigh in defeat, knowing i can never refuse him when he talks like this "ok, but if you are uncomfortable even in the slightest, i'm stopping."

He nods and lifts his head smiling smugly "Deal, now kiss me."

I shake my head at him amusingly, but oblige his request, he doesn't need to tell me twice. I take his head in my hands and pull him to my lips, mine immediately fitting to his like they were specially made for him. His lips were always so soft, and slightly plump due to him always biting them. His lips drive me insane, i just want more with every taste, and we can never be close enough to each other. His lips part without having to ask, and invites me inside. My tongue dives inside, greedy and relentless. He moans into the kiss and my heart rate picks up, leaving me panting and pulling away gasping for air.

"See i can handle that, kissing isn't a problem." He breaths. "i think i'm ready for more."

I gasp, suddenly getting an idea. "Ji, lay down"

His eyes bulge. "i'm not that ready, Seung."

I laugh, realizing where i went wrong "no, don't worry, it's not like that... we are going to do a beta test"

He raises his eyebrows and gives me that 'really' look that only Ji can give me, without getting hit.

"Just do it." i say and push him lightly with my hand on his arm.

"Nerd" Ji rolls his eyes but does as i want, positioning himself on his back against the bed. "what now?"

"Now, we see exactly where we need to work on" i reach down and place my hands on his arms "arms seem fine" i slide my hands down to his wrists then back up to his shoulders, then i slowly start to inch my way around the curve of his shoulder and he pulls away from my right hand, then gives me a look of apology. "Okay, left shoulder is a no go, something to work on." i remark and skip over his left shoulder moving up his neck to his cheeks. I smile and lean down to peck him on the lips, making amusement dance in his eyes, before i start to move down once again. My hands slid slowly over his collar bone and down his chest, he trembles slightly but doesn't move. Once i reach his abdomen, he tenses up and closes his eyes. He wants to do this for me, i know he does, but i hate the idea of causing him distress. "so the abdomen and rib area is another progress zone." i remark and lift my hands, skipping down to below his belly button.

I rub my hands across his lower abdomen, reaching the area where his thighs and hips meet. I love the way his body dips here, making his hips stick out slightly. "So sexy, i like this spot." i say admiring the way my hands fit perfectly in the creases.

I start to massage the area, a little lost in my new found obsession, but I am brought out quickly by Ji's soft moan ringing in my ears. I stop and glance up at him nervously, to see his head thrown back and his lip captured between his teeth. My jaw drops at how good Ji looks like this. A slight blush blooms over his cheeks, his eyes close tight, and his eyebrows furrow. "J-Ji" i stutter and swallow hard.

His eyes pop open and he looks down at me with dilated pupils, his breath coming out in hot pants. I continue to stare into his eyes, and slowly start to move my hands over to the slowly growing bulge in his pants. I began to palm him through his pants, and he groans, biting his lip harder. He doesn't push me away, nor does he seem uncomfortable with me touching him here, so i decide to see exactly how hard i can push him.

I move my body so i'm hovering over him and place one hand on his cheek "Ji, you're going to make your lip bleed like that." i pull at his chin to get him to release the abused flesh, and a loud moan flows out of his mouth. I snort. 'ah, that's why' i stare down at him, then bend to press my lips to his, while i continue to rub his clothed member, catching any of the noises escaping. "You don't seem to have problem with me touching you here."

Ji inhales shakily. "He never touched me there."

"Do you like me touching you here?" i whisper huskily into his ear, making his body shutter.

"Yes" he gasps. "Don't stop."

I start to nuzzle his neck, kissing, nipping, and sucking at the sensitive skin. He starts to move his hips around, creating more friction, while the noises leaving his mouth intensifies. His breathing starts to quicken and his body is trembling signaling his on coming release, and i speed up my movements, causing his back to arch off the bed.

Suddenly the door opens "Hey guys, mom sai... woah" Minho enters the room and quickly turns around "s-sorry... i was jus... breakfast is ready" he shouts a little too loud and quickly leaves, slamming the door.

Ji looks up at me, blinking rapidly, seeming to have just woken up from a spell. "um... maybe we should..."

I blush and clear my throat "i think we got carried away."

He giggles lightly, but it soon turns into full laughter and i can't help but join him, and before I know it we are laying down on the bed next to each other, rolling with laughter.

"That'll teach him to knock next time." Ji says after we calm down.

I take in large breath. "You okay?"

He turns his head to look at me. "Actually, yeah i'm good, a little frustrated, but good."

I smile, trying not to laugh at his 'frustrated' comment "i didn't get to finish my beta test." i throw him my best pout face and he rolls his eyes.

"Don't worry, we can finish later." he giggles then jumps up, shifting slightly as if uncomfortable.

"You sure you're fine?" i ask watching him pad across the room awkwardly.

"Yeah, i'm just not use to this feeling." He says.

"What being touched that much?" I ask confused.

"No... being... aroused." He answers, turning to me and placing his hands in front of his crotch, and his cheeks turn a cute shade of red once more.

I raise an eyebrow "you've never had a hard on before?"

He shakes his head "i stay away from sexual type situations or fantasies. I've never even been attracted to anyone but you before."

"What about when you were younger? Didn't you ever... masturbate?" i question, cringing at that word.

He shakes his head. "There was other things to fill my time with, and i was more concerned over taking care of Seungri... Dr. Park says that it's normal for abuse cases to separate themselves from intimacy."

"But now I'm kind of forcing you into those situations." i feel terrible, Ji has been through some traumatic events, and I just keep going after him like a horny teenager. 'What's wrong with you Seunghyun?'

"Don't do that, you're not forcing me Seunghyun. I wanted it, i still do... but i don't want to get caught again... that was embarrassing." he turns a darker red and glances away.

Shock seizes me, he wants to continue? And the only reason he stopped was because he didn't want to get caught? I'm amazed, I never expected Ji to feel this way so quickly. Before I can understand what's happening, i get off the bed and walk over to him grabbing his wrist, then pull him across the room into his bathroom.

I lock the bathroom door and turn to him "grip the counter" i command. He gives me a startled look and i almost laugh "i don't want you falling down. Orgasms can get intense, so please grip the counter"

His eyes bulge. "O-orgasm."

I sigh "i can't have you hard all the way through breakfast." i grab his arms and force his hands onto the edge of the counter, so he's facing the large mirror in his bathroom. He grasps the counter lightly and his breathing accelerates. "we don't have a lot of time, so this will be quick." He bites his lip and looks down at the counter, while i finally notice for the first time how much makeup he has "Ji, seriously i think you have more makeup than most female idols.0

He rolls his eyes. "Seung, please." he whines in a needy tone.

I chuckle "sorry, baby. I'll make it better." My hands once again find my new favorite spot in his hip creases, before the tips of my fingers slid into the waist band of his jeans.

"Wait, you're going in?" he asks in surprise, jerking his hips back against me.

I snort. "well palming you through your pants will take too long standing, and i don't think you're ready for me to pull your pants down and go down on you"

He swallows hard, taking in all of the information i'm throwing at him. "i'm nervous, what if it's to much? You're actually touching me, skin to skin"

I look at his wide eyes in the mirror. "then tell me to stop. Beta test, remember? Trust me, Ji."

His face sobers up and the look of resolve reappears "i trust you."

That's all i need, and i slowly descend my hand further into his pants and underwear till i reach his sex. Ji grasps onto the counter harder and groans, while i wrap my hand around him. I stand there for a few minutes, letting him get use to the feeling of me touching him, until he starts to move against me, telling me to start moving my hand up and down his length, which awards me with a high pitched whine from the boy in front of me. He shakes slightly and seems to tense up, before closing his eyes tightly.

I pause my hand. "Ji, baby, look at me, keep eye contact or i'll stop."

He whines but opens his eyes, to reveal blown pupils and a needy fear in them, but Ji was still my Ji, so i continue stroking him, watching him, staring deep into his eyes. This created a deeper connection between us, and i almost swear i feel his pleasure along with him.

"Oh god, that feels so good. Faster, Seung." Ji moans out, making my own member twitch in my pants. I have wanted to see Ji like this since the minute i met him. He is a mess shrouded in pleasure and i love it.

I comply with his needs and Ji arches his back, throwing his head against my shoulder, as i pump him harder. Ji begins to tremble and breath harder, giving me the warning that he's close.

Ji whimpers, his hands letting go of the counter and grasping onto my arms tightly "Seung."

"It's okay, baby. Let it come." I calm him, rubbing circles over his hip crease with my palm that wasn't busy, to ease some of the intensity.

Ji's body tenses and he arches back more. He calls out loudly, bucking his hips forward erratically, before i feel a wet, hot substance spill over my hand, as i continue to pump, helping him ride it out. Ji's legs start to wobble and i wrap my free arm around his waist to hold him up.

"That was..." Ji says dreamily, his eyelids heavy, coming down from the high.

I laugh, pleased by his expression "i know, baby. I know." I place a soft kiss on his temple and shift him forward "now we have to clean up." i pull my hand out of his pants and he turns on the faucet letting me rinse it off.

"I should probably change" Ji says still seeming in a daze.

"Ji, baby. Do you need help? Are you alright?" i ask concerned by how out of it he seems.

He looks up at me and there is a light in his eyes i've never seen before "i'm good m, Seunghyun. Actually i'm amazing... i never knew it could feel like that."

I laugh. "Ji, that wasn't even touching the surface at how good i can make you feel"

Ji's eyes light up. "i want it."

I shake my head. "You're not ready baby, we'll get there."

"But i am ready" He pouts.

I chuckle at his cuteness "i'll make you a deal, when i can touch your thighs without you tensing in the slightest, then i'll believe you about being ready."

Ji shifts, then looks up into the mirror connecting our gazes. "Okay, touch me."

"Ji" i sigh.

"Please Seunghyun, just try."

I blink, knowing i need to be straight with him, but didn't want to scare him "your bare thighs, Ji. Nothing in the way. Just me and you, skin on skin, as you put it earlier." i whisper in his ear.

His lip trembles and an involuntary "no." slips out of his mouth.

I sigh, hating to see that panic in his eyes. "That's what i thought. Now, change and i'll meet you downstairs"

"Wait" Ji exclaims stopping me and i hold my breath pleading with him not to try, i know he can't handle this yet "will you touch me...like you just did without being able to touch me... there?"

I chuckle. "Of course, baby. We just won't move on to the main stuff until i know you're ready, alay? And trust me now that I know I can touch you, I will take every opportunity I can to do so."

He nods and looks down at the floor "are you going to leave now?" He questions, biting at his bottom lip.

He looks back up, when I don't answer immediately and I notice a certain level of fear and need resting in his eyes, and I realize instantly that I have made a mistake.

I smile and step forward, pulling him into my arms, cursing myself for forgetting about what Ji needs right now. He needs attention, he needs to be shown that love he never got when he was younger. He needs to be reassured of my love for him and I was happy to give it to him.

Ji nearly collapses into my arms and sighs contently and I know I'm right. He's never had this type of love with anyone and he doesn't really know how to ask for it, or that this is what he really wants "i need you to make me a promise." I say, needing him to understand that it's okay to want this.

"Anything." He promises.

"When you need love from me, or affection, you need to tell me... i know it's not something you're use to feeling or wanting, but if you want it, ask for it... promise me you won't hesitate to tell me when you need this" i say hugging him tighter.

He nods against my chest. "I promise"

"Good, now clean up, and I'll meet you downstairs." I place a kiss on his forehead and unlock the bathroom door.

"Seung?" Ji asks in a small voice.

"Yes baby?" i turn to him, finding nothing but love and happiness in his eyes.

"Thank you, for loving me"

I smile, feeling slightly shy. "Thank you for letting me"

>>>>>

I nearly skip into the kitchen and stop when I find Hwa Yun setting breakfast on the table, with the rest of Ji's family surrounding it. "There you are. Where's Ji?"

I smirk briefly and luckily she doesn't catch it "he's changing"

Hwa Yun looks around nervously "I heard him screaming last night, did he have another nightmare?"

I nod, pushing the memories of last night out of my head, and sit down at the table, in the chair the has become mine. "Yeah, it made him physically sick, that's how bad it was."

She closes her eyes as if disturbed by this information. "I thought they stopped, he hasn't had many since you two started dating... has anything happened lately that upset him?"

I shift, unsure if I should tell her about the letter Ji had gotten the other night and how he reacted to it. "Um not really, maybe he's just stressed about school or something... you know how he can be."

She nods but doesn't seem convinced "I just wish I knew where his head was."

I try to think of something i could give her that might help, and come to a conclusion that might work "Well I think he might be thinking of his brother more lately, maybe that's causing it... oh which reminds me, why does he still talk about Seungri in the present tense?" I ask, focusing on placing my napkin on my lap.

Silence fills the room and I look up to find the shocked faces of Ji's family staring at me. "What?" I start probing around my face to see if anything was there.

"He talked to you about Seungri?" Hyun Suk asks me in a disbelieving tone.

I lift an eyebrow "yeah, we sat there for a couple hours this morning after he had that nightmare talking about him, he really seemed to love him"

Hwa Yun glances at her husband and breaths out a short laugh, while he just smiles and shakes his head "Ji's never talked about his brother before... with anyone."

The weight of his words crash into me. "Ever?"

"Never ever, he's just refused to talk about him, he wouldn't even talk about what happened the night Seungri died. The case is basically still open because Ji won't tell anyone how Seungri died or anything else that went down" Hyun Suk says and my jaw drops. "And Ji talks about him in present tense because he hasn't fully excepted his death, he's aware of it, but hasn't allowed himself to face it yet."

I blink a couple times taking in this new information. "Why?"

"Dr. Park thinks it's due to his survival mode kicking in. Since he can remember, Ji leaned on Seungri for a source of happiness, and Ji thinks that if he excepts his brothers death and let's him go then he will lose everything. He'll crumble." Hwa Yun states sadly. "He's afraid of being alone even though he's the one who pushes everyone away. Ji's terrified that if he lets go of Seungri, he'll have no one."

My vision blurs momentarily and I look away, blinking the tears out. "He's not alone anymore. I won't ever leave him."

"We know, and we couldn't be happier over what you've done for our son. Ji is so happy now, and for the longest time we thought he would never be able to live a normal, happy life but now we have so much hope for him, for the both of you." Hwa Yun leans over and pats my arm "thank you for loving him Seung. You've saved him in ways even we can't fully grasp yet."

I smile and look back at her, with as much love as she's giving me. "God, can't I walk into a room just once, without everyone looking like they are about to cry." I roll my eyes at the voice that can only belong to my boyfriend, when he comes into view and sits down next to me.

"Another shower?" I ask noticing his wet hair, hanging loosely to his shoulders.

He smirks and takes a sip of orange juice. "We made more of a mess than I thought." He admits low enough that only I and Minho, who was sitting next to him can hear.

Minho turns bright red and drops his head, staring at the table. Ji chuckles and I shake my head at him.

"I think you broke your brother." I observe.

Ji giggles and pops a piece of fruit into his mouth. "He'll he fine. He will understand one day... which reminds me, how did it go with the best friend?"

Minho's head shoots up and he looks at his brother with wide eyes before fixing me with an accusing stare. "Did you tell him?"

"Hey, don't look at him like that, I was in the room too, I overheard, you don't exactly know how to speak in a low register." my boyfriend snaps.

Minho sighs "sorry, I'm just a little on edge I guess." he scratches the back of his neck anxiously.

"What happened?" I question, concerned for the younger boy, who is quickly becoming a brother to me.

"Well, I kind of... confessed, but he didn't really say anything... he just said he needed time to think." Minho's hand twitched slightly making it apparent just how stressed he is.

"That's not exactly a bad thing, maybe he's just trying to collect himself, like he said, thinking things through, weighing the situation." I offer.

Minho nods but doesn't look any more convinced, but that changes when Ji steps it with advice of his own.

"Allowing someone to love you, that way, takes a lot of trust, and it's scary, I'm sure he's worried about hurting your friendship. You two have been friends since you were little kids and taking your friendship into the relationship zone could potentially ruin what you two have as best friends." Ji takes a sip of juice before continuing. "And I'm sure he's had those thoughts about you before, but has never invested time into anything serious like you have, give him some time to think things through. There's a lot to think about when it comes to loving someone." He finishes and looks up giving a supportive smile to his brother.

"You really think he's just thinking it through?" Minho asks like he's grasping at anything he can, to stay afloat.

Ji nods. "Just do yourself a favor though, send him a message, tell him that no matter what happens, you'll love him either way, take a bit of the pressure off."

The sides of Minho's mouth picks up slightly and he pulls out his phone. "Yeah. I'll do that."

"After breakfast" Hyun Suk scolds, making me realize that the whole table has been zeroed in on our conversation.

"Since when did you become an expert in love?" Minji asks Ji.

Ji snorts "I've been hearing this shit from Dr. Park for years. I figured it might as well help someone." then he reaches over and grabs my hand. "And i'm starting to figure some of this out on my own."

I smile and wink at him forcing a giggle from his lips, while his family continues to focus their attention on us. "Guys, we are not zoo animals. Quit gawking." Ji finally snaps, refusing to break eye contact with me.

I notice the exchanged smiles of his parents and the chuckles of his siblings, but my attention is focused on the honey brown color of his eyes and the light that seems to sparkle in them. I realize in this moment that he's really in love with me, he may not be able to say it yet, but his eyes tell me the truth. We were in love with each other and that was all that mattered, because we had each other and we would make it through anything. Ji leans over placing a kiss on my lips, then turns back to his plate and continues to eat his breakfast, never once letting go of my hand.

>>>>>>

My darling Chickens!!

Hopefully i didn't kill you all with those Seungri feels, and you could stick around for light smut. I didn't want to push them to far, even though i feel sexually frustrated just writing about them, it's just not the right time for them to go ALL THE WAY yet. Trust me i want to shove them together and be like "now screw" too, but you'll have to wait a little longer.

Did you like my fluffy chappie? I love these two being cute together, and the way they interact with each other, haha relationship goals right here!! But i'm going to stop gushing about my GTop feels because i can literally talk about this all night, seriously I have with my Umma many times... I think she may love this ship more than me sometimes, but still!! lol

Any questions, comments, concerns? Don't be afraid to direct them my way, i love to talk to you guys, it's great to get your opinions and support. It makes me want to wrap you guys up in a blanket, give you a cup of tea, and talk to you all night!! I know you're probably asking "M, how would we get into your living room?" and i'm telling you right now my friends, anything is possible through the power of LOVE and i really good internet connection!! haha jkjk, but seriously don't be afraid to comment, or message anytime, i promise i won't bite! 😉

Anyways, i love all of you, my precious little Chickens!! See you next chappie!!

사랑해💕

~M~