I had done some pretty scary things in life, like eating food that I cooked with the one percent chance that I wouldn't get food poisoning or the most obvious one, dying my hair pink. People always say that you don't truly live life without taking a few risks, that without doing some slightly insane things, you wouldn't have good stories to tell when you're eighty years old and surrounded by grand kids. 

And your parents told you to never ever ever talk to strangers, whether it be an old man offering you candy or that suspicious old lady that lives down the street that may or may not be grinding up little kids to feed her one hundred cats. Even I was smart enough to teach Flora that.

Holding awkward conversations with beautiful supernatural monsters topped everything.

After one agonizing hour of Genie dragging me along to talk to complete strangers, where most everyone said something about my pink hair or being the "Alpha's Girl" (I suppose that was what I was known as by now) I finally put my foot down. So far, I had met most of Lucian's pack and some other werewolves that Genie insisted were important. Also, I could have sworn I saw Professor Stinklehoffen somewhere too. Grabbing a cup of soda, I walked to the campfire.

Genie had wandered off to talk to Vaughn. I took a seat on one of the logs around a circle of fire. The flames licked the white hot logs like starving children. It was mesmerizing to watch the flames dancing. It was strange to think about....fire, crucial for human survival yet one of the biggest grim reapers of innocent lives and burning homes to ashes.

Castleton was one of those places that was naturally cold, like Draycott. The deep midnight sky was devoid of any stars or the moon, but the air felt clean and crisp. I was the only one around the fire. It emitted a wonderful heat. Everyone else was glued to the side of their mates, talking and laughing like it was a fun festival instead of the forcing of my hand to be Lucian's eternal soul mate. The cup was crushing under how tightly my fingers gripped it.

Everyone else seemed happy. The couples looked at each other with pure adoration in their eyes. I didn't understand how they could just accept it. I was angry I did not have a choice to choose who I spent the rest of my life with. 

Lucian suddenly appeared beside me.

"Hello."

I jumped, almost splashing the drink onto the sweater from his sudden voice. The air seemed to get warmer when Lucian laid his hand on my knee. I could feel the heat from his palm soak through the soft material of the jeans. Disgust and something uncomfortable inside my stomach. I was angry, not at Lucian but at myself. Why couldn't I control my hormones around Lucian? The bond was changing things, things that I didn't want to, but it was still my body. Why did I have to act like a horny teenager who was starved for sex when he was around?

Lucian cleared his throat softly and moved closer so that our shoulders were set side-by-side. I tied scooching away but found that I was at the end of the log we sat upon.

"Cheer up, Victoria." Lucian muttered, staring at the barren sky. His grey eyes had taken on a strange glow from the fire. He glanced at me through the corner of his eyes and took a sip from the drink in his hand. I had to force myself to look away from how his Adam's apple bobbed. "Think like an optimist. You'll never get anywhere in life-"

"Like you're even going to let me live one." I couldn't keep the bitter tone out of my words. God, why did I say that? Lucian's fingers tightened on my leg. "Hey, I have an idea. If I had some plastic surgery to remove this disgusting animal mark off my neck, do you think this dumb fucking bond will be broken?"

Hormones? Bottled up rage over the unfairness I've had? A simple sentence had ruined our entire night. I hated myself. 

"Watch your words, little mate." was his cold reply.

"Why?" I glared at him, absolutely fuming. "Because you don't give me consent, Lucian?"

The pain inside my chest was like a heavy anchor. I was sure Lucian could feel it too from how he slightly winced.

"I am not going to do this with you tonight." Lucian growled softly. "And I certainly won't fight your hostility against me. Admit it, Victoria. Without me, you and Flora would be out on the streets right now. She's much better off in boarding school-"

"Don't you dare talk about my sister!" I threw the cup from my hand into the glowing umber fire. It crackled brightly as the thin plastic was quickly engulfed into the flames. "God, you have some nerve to berate-"

"Can I have everyone's attention?" Lucian cut me off as though I hadn't even spoken. Anger unfurled in my chest but I bit my tongue as everyone gathered around the fire. Within moments, the other 10 logs were filled except for the one Lucian and I sat upon. Genie and Vaughn were cuddled near the back, looking content in each other's arms. It saddened me to know that Lucian and I could never be like that. He was the Alpha and I was nothing but the last piece of puzzle for his wolf pack. I was only needed to make his pack stronger and better.

Lucian glanced at me, a strange emotion in his eyes as everyone made last second seat changes and got food from the tables set around. He bent in closer until his mouth delicately pecked at mine, a simple kiss yet it made my entire body light up with fire. A few soft murmurs of admiration went around as numerous wolves caught the display of affection. I wasn't sure if Lucian had done it to prove our artificial love in front of everyone or out of his complete desire.

London became still when Lucian started his story. All the while, his hand rested on my leg. I eventually accepted it and it became a comforting gesture as the seconds ticked past.

"The Winter Wolves Elder, the first leader of this pack, was a man named Fenrir Nayati. He was my great great great, and many more greats, grandfather in the 16th century." Lucian cleared his throat softly. "Being the first of the breakouts wasn't always easy. We've all had someone in our lives to guide our way through the process. The Elders had no help, which is one of the many reasons why they are so respected. At that time, anything that did not fit the strict rules of society became a rumour for witchcraft, which had dire consequences."

"When Fenrir first showed signs, he thought he was going crazy. Being born out of wedlock from a tatty of wolf society, it was no question why he thought this. Strange, golden eyes was usually a sign of insanity." This earned a few light chuckles. "Fenrir admitted himself into the London Psychiatric Hospital for mentally sick people. The doctors at that time were human and had no clue what to do with him. Wolfsbane was not created until the late 1800's."

"After a rough few days, Fenrir finally found self peace. The craving for human blood lessened and his primal urges were shoved back into the wolf inside. But this was only because that night had a full moon. The next day, Fenrir was deemed diagnostically impossible to cure after a violent attack on Henrietta Jones, the nurse who had been in the room with Fenrir to give him his daily dose of anesthetics."

"The doctor who was assigned to find out what was wrong with Fenrir was a strong believer in witchcraft. With the idea that he was sent by God to rid the world of all sins, Doctor Jeffrey Benton left his night shift on March 9, 1693 and drove a stake through Fenrir Nayati's heart with silver. But this, to Benton's horrible realization, did not work."

"A few years later, Fenrir slowly began to come to terms with what he was no matter how crazy it seemed." Lucian's voice was quiet but everyone's attention was in his hands. "He met a man named Radin who had been dealing with the same conditions for years now. Fenrir and Radin worked together for years. Time, they realized, was limitless in their hands. Immortality would have been a great befaller for the wolves sitting here today, if not for Radin's solution of wolfsbane."

Tears welled up in my eyes at Lucian's surprisingly heartfelt story. Genie had said he would tell the history of his pack tonight, but I hadn't quite expected it to be like this. In a moment of vulnerability, I picked up his hand on my leg and entwined my fingers. Lucian's large hands engulfed mine in a wonderful warmth. The fire cracked, the only other sound other than Lucian's voice.

"Both of them decided to form the Elder's Declaration to keep the wolf society in check." Lucian smiled at me. It shot a strange feeling through my heart. "Through time, many others who proved themselves worthy joined, and are now the Elder's Declaration that we know of today. Without the Elders, there would be chaos. Humans and werewolves could never survive together. Because of Fenrir and Radin, we have peace." Lucian's voice was rough, as if he was reliving the memories in his head.

His story was followed my silence but it was comforting. I stared at the dying flames, in my own world. It made sense now. Because Fenrir had risen to such power, the other packs were jealous. I could tell, even from the short amount of time that I had spent, that power and loyalty means everything to a werewolf pack. That was why Viktor was thirsting for my blood. The Winter Wolves were the oldest pack around because Fenrir had been one of the firsts. Lucian's words held a weight that I couldn't quite understand but judging from the emotional look in Genie's eyes, it meant a lot to her and the wolves.

"Non nisi boni esse, ut in brumali lupos." Lucian said softly. It was the same phrase he had said in the ballroom. It sounded faintly like Latin, but I couldn't be sure. Everyone raised their glass in a silent toast and drank. Lucian smiled faintly and did the same.

"What does that mean?" I asked as everyone stood up. Genie's bright red hair dispersed with the rest of the crowd. Lucian stood up, yanking me along with him. 

"It means, roughly translated, 'May only good come upon the Winter Wolves.' It is a Latin phrase that every Alpha says, with their name in replacement of course, at the end of a mating festival." he explained.

I sighed. "I just feel like I don't fit in. You said it yourself. Humans and werewolves don't mix. Why couldn't you mate with another werewolf? I'm human, you're not. You're a wolf. Find a wolf girlfriend, isn't that how it works?" Even as I said this, I knew how stupid my words were. It flared up a deep jealousy within me, to think of Lucian being with someone else. I suppose the bond works both ways.

"I'm yours." Lucian growled. "And you're mine. There's nothing more to it, Victoria." His hand slid around my waist, sending a little flutter through me. His body was so unnaturally warm. It was a nice contrast with the coldness of the night air. "I have a duty to love and protect you."

"A duty." I repeated the words sadly. "It's not your responsibility to love me, Lucian. It's not supposed to be a task, a job...a duty. You're under no obligation to love or protect me, okay? I can take care of myself, I have for the past seventeen years. I guess what I'm trying to say is that-" It was getting harder to speak "-if you really don't love me, please don't pretend to."

"You misunderstood." Lucian's fingers tightened. "As an Alpha, I have many duties. What I feel for you is real. It may not seem like that sometimes but in the end, I will always love you the only way I know how. I do not know how else I can put it in a way that you would understand. I have no clue what goes on in that little human brain of yours, Victoria. I am not pretending to love you, Victoria. I really do. And I will spend the rest of my life proving it."

My throat closed up. For a few moments, I couldn't speak. How could someone be so vigilant in making me happy? No one else had ever tried to love me until Lucian came along. Why me? I thought about it so many times. I don't deserve Lucian. He's perfect and I'm a mess. To be loved so deeply by someone that it consumes every thought of mine was a delicate thing.

"I mated with you because you are special, Victoria." Lucian said gingerly. "Because I think in the end, you are going to be the one that saves us all."