I had been drawn to the water for as long as I could remember, the sound of water slapping against water as waves rose and collapsed. The scent of the salt in the air as the miniscule droplets wafted towards the shore in a blanket of vapour. The mystery of not quite knowing what was in the water with you, not quite knowing where the security of the sand ends and the bottomless pit of the ocean begins.

Countless days of my childhood were spent watching as the tips of the waved turned to froth, bubbling in a thin layer on the shore, bubbles popping and disappearing as it soaked into the sand, only for another layer to coat the granules.

I wasn't the only one of course, the beach just 5 minutes from my house was more often than not filled with countless people. Tourists and locals alike came to visit the edge of their well known grounds in fascination.

I had been drawn to the water for as long as I could remember, and for as long as I could remember, I had been terrified of it. The shift from a glistening aquamarine, welcoming and warm, to a sudden navy - forboding and cold. The sensation of your heart as it sinks to your stomach when the floor is no longer under your feet.

I spent my days sitting on the sand, well away from the edge of the water, watching the foam drift upon land from a distance. Keeping the warm, dry sand between my toes, I found myself flinching at the slightest drop of salty water. Things were different at home, obviously I could handle drinking, bathing, showering, but it was something about the sea. About the smell, the sound, the sight of it that screamed for me to stay away.

There were times I woke up in cold sweat, eyes wide and lower lip stinging as it bubbled with blood from the sharp tips of my front teeth. Times I would wake up with my heart hammering so loudly in my chest it would echo in my ears and my head would throb in tune with it.

Those were times where my dreams were filled with the water that scared me so much, the lack of floor beneath my feet and the lack of air surrounding my lungs. I would see my hair floating in front of my face in almost peaceful wisps, it was calm in those times. Then suddenly, suddenly my chest would tighten, throat clamping down itself, my lungs would burn in searing pain. Arms thrashing and legs kicking as I desperately searched for the surface.

I can't breathe

Those times were the times that made me afraid, that made me wish I could stay away, but I knew I couldn't. Not with my impending doom sitting just outside my window. The soft sounds of the waves crashing against the sharp jagged rocks called out to me like a sirens whisper. It was terrifying, but so hard to ignore.

On the nights where my dreams were the worst, where the water was just a little colder than usual, just a little darker, and it was just a little harder to breathe; I would come here. To the root of my fear, I would sit on the beach, watching the icy cold waves inch closer than they had only a few hours prior.

My fear would draw me to the very place I was afraid of, the only reason I could come up with, was something along the lines of keeping an eye on the enemy. Many of my dreams were formed on the sound of the trickling water as it seeped in under my bedroom door, slowly filling the room.

Unconsciously, my fingers slip through the sand, once warm from the sun. With the hours of lacking sunlight, had turned a chilling cold, I clutched the sand tightly in my fists. The miniscule granules slipping through my fingers in ropes of what could only be described as lines of silk.

I clutched it tightly, as to assure myself that I was on solid ground, that the water hadn't reached me, that I wasn't sitll dreaming. The security of the soft sand between my fingers grounded me, tied me to the reality that the water couldn't touch me, not if I didn't want it to.


--


I liked to consider myself an expert on the ocean, knowing the colour of the water depending on the weather before making my daily trip down to the beach. How high the waves would tower over the surfers depending on the distance of the moon the night before, and the creatures that swam a little too close to the shore.

So sitting on the safe bank of sand, the sea a forboding shade of black reflecting the darkness of the sky. The beach, once filled with joyous laughter and excited screams was silent. The stretch of sand miles long devoid of life except for the occasional bird and myself. There was a glimpse of movement, far too unnatural to be water that caught my eye.

The bright light of the moon reflecting off of water coated skin, light parting into small almost tear drop like shapes, what I could only guess to be scales. I would have almost mistaken it for a normal fish had it not been for the sheer size of the tail that rose out of the water, hurriedly plummeting back down into it with a large spray.

I reeled back, kicking at the sand as drops of water were sent shooting towards me. I flinched at the cold drop of water against my cheek, sending a hard shudder down my back.

Too small and too close to the shore to be a whale, the sight of the scales ruling out a dolphin, the only option I could think of was a rather large, rather oddly shaped fish. Slowly and shakily, I rise to my feet, knees threatening to buckle at the tide that quickly approached. Subconsciously, I stumbled back from the edge of the water, even though it was many feet away.

I gulped down the chilling air around me greedily, throat closing to lock the air in my lungs, trembling fingers came up to grip the front of my shirt for some kind of purchase. Against my own will, against the screaming in the back of my head, I took one miniscule shuffle towards the growing waves.

Pausing only when the flash of shimmering scales emerged from the water once more, the thought that it was still here, it was still close only moved to drive me. My other foot took a slightly larger step, the other a larger one, and another, and another until finally; the edge of the water, formed of foam and sand licked the tip of my toes.

The breath I had locked in my lungs came out in one fluid exhale, I choked in a stuttering gasp at the cold liquid against my skin. Body trembling, heart constricting and relaxing at a hard, heavy pace in my chest. I ignored the tingling of blood rushing under my skin, the small gasps of breath leaving and enterring my body, lungs burning as the small breaths barely carried enough oxygen through my system.

Willing myself to calm down, ignoring the dampening of my shirt as sweat glistened my palms, I struggled to take the next step. Watching with anxious shivers as the tide receded slowly, waves clashing and inching the tide even closer. Through the darkness of the water, it was as if my eyes had deceived me for a flash of a second as a sudden, almost glowing red shot into my vision.

I convinced myself, forced myself, to stand still, to not lose my faith and run away from the one thing that I wished I could touch. With the frothy tips of the waves licking my ankles, I focused less on the prickling sensation of the ice cold water against my skin, and focused more on the burning of my lungs begging for consistent breath.

My foot lifted slowly, sand thick and gloopy with water caused my balance to shift slightly, and whilst I stumbled, the flash of red grew closer. My only guess could be it belonged to whatever sea creature's tail I had seen earlier.

I took another, miniscule step forward, breath hitching in my throat as the water inched it's way higher along my shins. Somehow, somewhere deep within my subconscious, the fear ebbed away. And I found myself wading further into the water; once I had regained some part of my common sense, I was standing hip deep in chilling water.

My body tensed in a hard, full body shiver, arms jolting up out of the water to press securely to my chest. What had induced the sudden spike of fear was nothing more than a gentle brush, the slightest nudge of some kind of surface against my calf. It could have been seaweed, or a harmless salt water fish, or something else, the something that had caused me to wander so far outside my comfort zone. The flash of red and alluring turquoise that had clung to my attention and drawn me towards the subject of my nightmares.

Staring down at the water that sheltered my body from the hips down, the water so dark I could barely see the edge of my shirt not even an inch below the surface. And yet somehow, the bright red was before me once again, just under the surface, just within reach.

The brush against my legs had returned, my hunch that the earlier touch was from this strange creature had been confirmed. As it grew increasingly closer to the surface, I could faintly see the wispy tips of whatever this thing was floating, shifting with the current, almost like--

"Hair?"

Red slowly tipped back, for a second it appeared as though it was floating away from me. And for a second I felt something akin to dread at the strange hair possessing creature leaving me standing in the cold clutch of the unknown. But the second passed, and replacing the red was the pale almost unseen by sun hint of skin, peaking out of the water was what I could only explain to be the tip of a nose, tip touched with pink from the cold of the night.

A person?

Drifting my eyes up from the peek of flesh I found myself meeting blue. Bright blue, almost iridescent in hue stared back at me, two glowing, identical orbs of blue placed at just the right distance apart to be identified.

"Eyes..."

The eyes, however, despite the glowing, despite the darkness of the water that surrounded them; didn't scare me. For some reason, staring into the eyes of a humanoid creature I had not yet identified stared at me, I held not a tinge of fear.

The eyes themselves, you see, weren't intimidating, weren't threatening simply - curious. Staring at me with pure, unadulterated awe as if they had never seen a girl before, or rather, had never seen a human.

"(Y/N)?! What the hell are the doing in the water? It's too late for this, come back home this instant!"

The loud, worried voice of my mother called from the board walk, enough to make me jump, feet dislodging from the thick casing of sand. The red headed, blue eyed being jerked away suddenly and in an instant disappeared from sight.

My only signification that this was not some fear induced haze, that the creature I had seen was real, was the thin, greenish blue flipper rising out of the water not a few feet from me before sinking back into the waves and truly disappearing.

I wasn't given a moment to watch, to search for the creature and hope it would return at some point, before my mother rushed down towards the very edge of the tide, in her arms a towel that look a tad too inviting.

--

Due to the fear that I might lose my mind, wander into the ocean and effectively drown myself, I had been locked inside my room until the week that followed. To retain my mother's trust, I had stayed inside the house throughout the day, not mentioning the beach once out of caution.

Once night had fallen, I gave myself time until the moon was well centred above the house before making my move. Sneaking by her closed door, I tread carefully, feet rolling from heel to toe so as not to greatly disturb the wooden planks beneath my feet.

Caution was thrown to the wind only once I stood on the porch, the door shut behind me. Dropping the flip flops in my hand onto the floor below me, I hurried to slip them on, racing down the pavement as fast as the flimsy rubber would allow me. At the pace I was moving, I was at the beach before I knew it, sandals sinking into the sand, I kicked them off by the wood of the board walk, rushing towards the ocean.

I stopped dead at the edge of the waves, watching the water ride up onto the sand and fall away, leaving darkened sand in their wake. My breath came out in short laboured pants "hello?" I called out, voice washing over the water that was far more still than I had ever seen it.

I reached down to pull at the string off my thin cardigan, throwing down onto the sand and leaving my body in nothing more than a swim suit, a swim suit that had not once touched the water. My arms wound around my torso as it was exposed to the chilly night air, legs bent slightly at the knees, I squeezed my thighs together. Whilst the water was for the most part still, I could only imagine the temperature.

My foot dragged forward, toes scraping at the sand as I did this. As the tip of a fresh wave met my skin, my body tremored in a vigorous shudder, it was as cold as I had expected, perhaps worse. I held myself back from the instinct to recoil, gulping in a deep breath and stepping forward.

The cold bit hard at the exposed skin of my legs, teeth sinking hard into supple flesh of my lower lip I grit, and I bore it. I was in hip deep water once more, waiting, expectant.

I wasn't quite sure why I thought that person, if it even was a person, would come back. Eyes scanning the dark black waters for a flash of turquoise, the reflection of the moon on scales, the bright red or the glowing blue. Untucking my hands from under my armpits, I cupped them around my mouth.

"Are you out there?!"

I rose my voice "whoev-- whatever you are!" I gulped heavily as I continued to search the waters, regardless of the fact that I couldn't see more than a few inches beneath the surface "please come out! I don't want to hurt you!".

The silence that followed was expected, but hope depleting none the less. Gulping, my hands lowered from my mouth, held at navel level as I made sure to keep it out of the waters icy touch. I took a hesitant step forward, hind leg following, my breath seemed to rush out of my lungs as the water was suddenly reaching my belly button.

"Please come out!"

Another step forward, the water was up to my ribs.

"Please! I just want to talk!"

Another step forward, the water was just below my chest.

"I don't know what you are! But I'm a friend! I promise!"

Another step, and suddenly--

It was as if the nightmares I had had weren't nightmares at all, rather, premonitions. It was hard to describe the sensation that thrummed through me as my next step was not met with the slippery expanse of sea bed. Have you ever walked down the stairs and expected another step when there wasn't one? The feeling of your heart jolting up into your throat, your skin prickles and every small hair on your body stands up on it's end.

Except this was worse, this was far worse.

I found myself plummeting into the water, the trusted ground disappearing from beneath my feet. My split second reaction barely granting me enough time to inhale a sharp gasp, eyes hurrying to squeeze closed before my body was enveloped in salt water.

I couldn't quite tell what stung worse, the fear that stabbed at my heart, or the painful pin pricks of the cold flooding my skin.

Panicking, is quite possible the worst thing to do in such a situation, and unfortunately, that's exactly what I did. Legs kicked at nothing and arms scrambled for a purchase I knew wouldn't be there. I clawed at the water, trying to push myself up to the best of my ability. My head tilted back to look up at the surface, and for a moment, it was peaceful, it was beautiful.

The sight of the light from the moon breaking through the water in thin streams, the unintelligable sight of the sky above. It was a moment that was far too short, I ignored the uncomfortable tingle of the salt water washing over my open eyes, and desperately tried to swim to the surface.

My lungs were burning and my head was pounding as my efforts were simply causing me to sink further, the moment the light of the surface was too far to be anything but menacing, the reality of the situation sunk in.

The fact that I was going to die, that I was going to die having conquered my worst fear wasn't the worst way I could imagine going. Or perhaps it was.

My chest screamed for air and against my will, bubbles of carbon dioxide rushed from my lips, floating towards the surface and in that moment, all I wished was to float with them.

What happened in, what must have been, a minute or two felt like an eternity, head throbbing from the pressure within me, I could see the black spots of unconsciousness crowd around the outer edges of my vision. And in my last moments of lucid thought, there was a flash of red, a glint of turquoise and a dim glow of blue. And then? Then there was black.

--

At the heart filling feeling of warmth against my back, all I could assume was that I had died, and this was some kind of after life. But the burning in my lungs and the pounding in my head said otherwise, every muscle in my body ached ferociously, I could only describe this as the worst pain I had ever been in.

"She's not dead, is she?"

My ears picked up on the hushed voice, male, quiet, most likely trying not to wake me. He paused for a few minutes, before whispering once more, as though he was having a conversation and yet I couldn't pick up the other voice.

Deciding I wasn't going to eavesdrop on his one sided conversation any longer, I let out a quiet groan of pain. Fighting the desire to keep my eyes closed, lashes that felt like lead slowly fluttered open. I blinked up at the ceiling.

Ceiling?

Above my head was a grey, uneven and jagged surface, one that I could only connect to a cave. Willing the muscles in my neck to work, I turned my head slowly, to the source of the voice.

"Red"

My hoarse whisper sent bright blue eyes wide "you're alive!" came an ecstatic gasp, the boy with the red hair and the glowing eyes rushed forward. Hands pressing into the sand, he dragged himself towards me.

Dragged?

My eyes slowly dragged down the male, focusing on his legs, or rather, where his legs should have been.

"Turquoise"

A tail with scales that shifted from a deep purple to a bright turquoise stared back at me. He had a tail. The tail I had seen in the dark that night. He had red hair, the hair I had seen not inches away from my stomach. He had blue eyes, the glowing blue I remember staring up at me through the water.

"You're from that night" I whispered "a merm--" my body jolted forward, and I ignored the pained scream my muscles released at the motion. My lungs scratched painfully as I hurriedly covered my mouth with my hand, from my mouth flew salt water, dripping from my palm. I didn't spare a moment to be disgusted, focusing on struggling to breathe.

A gentle hand splayed over my spine, coaxing the coughing to stop. As the water was expelled from my air ways, I hunched over myself, panting hard in an effort to regain my breathing pattern.

With my breath and my train of thought regathered, I turned my head to stare at the male with wide eyes "you...you're a merman" I whispered quietly.

Glowing blue glanced down his own body to look down at his tail "I am-- is that a problem?" he mumbled hesitantly, bristling up suddenly, shoulders lifting to meet the ends of his ear lobes "please don't tell the other humans! My father will kill me!" reaching forward, his hands clasping mine tightly, holding them at chest level.

Wide eyed, my eyes flickered between the pale hands that gripped my own and back up to his face "I won't tell anyone" I mumbled quickly, slowly moving to draw my hands out of his grasp. "Was it you that saved me?", he nodded hurriedly, hair bouncing at the vigorous movement.

"Thank you" I sent the male a gentle smile, to which he returned brightly. Using this opportunity, I found myself glancing around the cave. At the opening of the cave was an expanse of blue, bright and glistening with the reflection of the sun, I was sat on a thin strip of sand.

Transparent water licked at the tips of my toes and I hurried to reel my feet back, breath leaving me in quick, short bursts. My back pressed hard and rather uncomfortably against the wall of the cave.

The merman looked down at me in a mix of confusion and worry, inner corners of deep red brows pinching together, furrowing. "What's wrong? Was there a jelly fish?" he perked up, scanning the shallow pool of water for the small sea creature. I shook my head, tucking my knees against my chest to shift as far from the water as I possibly could.

"I don't like the water" I mumbled quietly.

Blue eyes turned towards me slower this time, his expression calculating "why?" he mumbled quietly, wrinkles between his brows unfurling slightly.

"It scares me"

Relaxing his face, all I could see in his eyes was a mix of concern and pity. Slowly, he dragged himself towards the water and sat himself down in the knee high pool. "It's perfectly safe!" he chirped, a reassuring smile pulling at his lips.

"The ocean has been my home for a full 16 years, it's safe, as long as you respect it".

"Yeah, well the ocean just tried to kill me so I'm gonna hold onto my opinion for a little bit longer"

Thick lashes, dark in contrast to his hair, fluttered briefly before the male spread into a grin, laughing to himself quietly. Pulling himself back towards the shore "I suppose I can get behind that reasoning".

"Though, if you wish to return to the land you came from, the only way in through the water"

My body stills at his words, and for a moment, I wish it wasn't true. I wish that I had never seen the mesmerizing glint of his colour shifting tail against the reflection of the moon, wish I hadn't overcome my fear (no matter how short that had been) and waded into the water.

My arms slip around my legs, holding them securely to my chest, glaring at the waves - cursing myself for thinking the shade of the water was beautiful. That the glistening of the sun upon the tips of every small wave was enchanting, for knowing that at this time of day, the temperature of the water must be a comfortable degrees betwen cold and luke warm.

This time of day?

With a ragged gasp, I pushed myself up and off of the wall, standing suddenly. The red headed merman jolted back with a flinch at the sudden movement "my mum! She has no idea I went out last night, oh I'm so grounded -- again" I mumbled hurriedly to myself, rushing towards the water.

My toes dug into the damp sand as I skidded to a sudden halt, staring down at the offending liquid pooled at my feet. Not a few steps away from me, the half human sea creature stared up at me "I could carry you on my back? Until you can stand up, I can't risk the other humans seeing me".

I paused upon hearing his offer, turning my head to look down at the male "you'd do that for me?" I whispered, voice hoarse from the previous coughing fit.

Where a hesitant pout once sat, a bright grin took it's place "Of course! I don't quite understand why you're scared of the ocean but-- I'm not going to push you into the swimming on your own if you're not ready, as long as I don't get caught, what's the harm in helping you, right?" he mumbled, shoulders rising and dropping in a brief shrug.

Teeth nipping at my lower lip, I weighed the options briefly, the scales tipped heavily and my answer should have been more or less obvious from the get go. Silently, I nodded my head, taking a cautious step towards him, I sucked in a sharp breath as the warm water licked at my toes.

Smile brightening, he slipped further into the water, turning his back to me. Tips of vibrant red hair brushed his shoulders, shoulders which were wide and well defined - a swimmer's body no doubt.

Walking into the water, I desperately willed the memory of my last experience in the ocean away. The water had reached my knees by the time I had reached the male, gulping silently, I leaned forward to wrap my arms around his neck from behind, hands grasping my wrists to assure that I wouldn't let go no matter the case.

"Use your--" he paused for a moment, as though thinking "feet? Feet! Use your feet to kick while we go, it might help a bit". Ignoring the smile of amusement at his lack of vocabulary, I gave a silent comment of affirmation before he had ducked his head beneath the water and turned towards the opening of the cave.

The nameless merman kept himself close to the surface of the water, assuring that my head would stay above at all times. As he gave a powerful kick of his tail, I felt a spike of adrenaline and fear course through my veins. The force of his body rolling as he swam caused the waves to rise around us, water bouncing against my chin with each stroke of a fin.

As we inched away from the security of the cave, I took a moment to admire the sights around me. The sight of the clouds meeting the ocean upon the horizon. The sight of blue as far as the eye could see, the stretch of beach not 10 minutes away at the pace we were moving.

Seeing this, seeing the serenity of the waves rising a few inches and lapping over one another, almost ebbed my fear away. Almost made me forget that it had almost killed me, made me forget my everlasting phobia of the water. Almost, but not entirely. I couldn't ignore the fear that struck me when he waved his tail a tad too hard, and the disgusting taste of salt water flooded into my mouth.

--

As the beach grew increasingly closer, the merman's pace grew slower. With a scared squeak, my arms tightened around his neck as the merman's tail disappeared from in between my legs and his head peeked out of the water. I could feel the muscles in his back flex and loosen, signifying he was stil kicking his tail to keep us afloat.

"We're almost there, you should be able to touch the ground soon" he mumbled quietly, not wishing to pick up the attention of the beach go-ers, swimming further out than normal.

My body trembled in fear against him "yeah" I whispered, voice shaky and despite the warmth of the water, my teeth chattered. The red head turned to glance of his shoulder "what's your name?" he mumbled gently.

"(Y/n)" I mumbled after a moment's pause.

"(Y/n)...it's the first time I've heard that name" he whispered. I suppose that should have come as less of a surprise, I expected mermaids to have rather odd names.

"Well my name's Aryn!" he chirped, I could hear the smile on his lips as he spoke "Seventh son of King Triton!", he spoke his title with pride.

I found my body tense against him, eyes blinking wide. The odds, that the first merman for me to have ever met to be a prince? It was outstanding.

"You're a prince...I suddenly feel incredibly under dressed" I glanced down at my swim suit clad body, the thought that the body of the male I was clutching on to for dear life was none other than a prince was something that I couldn't quite fathom. Aryn chuckled quietly at the words I whispered into his ear.

"It's nothing incredible, I assure you, I'm just a regular old merman"

The bluntness of his admission was rather laughable, that the fact he was not only a merman, but a prince to boot was more than just 'regular'.

"I hope to see you again then, Prince Aryn, seventh son of King Triton".

The merman paused for a breath before nodding his head and turned to smile at me "I hope I see you agan too".

--

It was a month before I returned to the beach, my mother opening the door upon my return in a mix of fury and worry. I had been confined to the house during the month, almost cursing Summer vacation, as I would have given anything to leave the house - even if that meant going to school.

Once my mother agreed, albeit reluctantly, to relieve the punishment, I had sprinted to the beach. Ignoring her yells about the late time of night that followed me out the door. I ignored the stinging of the pavement against the bare soles of my feet, the heat that accumulated from the friction of skin against cement.

Skin rubbed raw met cold sand with a wash of relief, pace slowing as feet kicked at loose sand. There was not a moment of hesitation as I surged towards the water, wincing at the salt against my pained feet. I hurriedly cup my hands over my mouth, searching the murky waters as I yelled.

"Aryn!"

The response wasn't immediate, no, it took a few minutes. But bursting out of the water in an array of glistening drops of spraying water, bright hair flying back with a crane of the neck. The action forceful enough to send heavy hair flying back, but with a graceful finesse.

Glowing eyes that greatly contrasted the dark skies and water, and a smile so bright it was as though I could see him perfectly clearly against the night. The male disappeared beneath the water, and not a moment later he popped up in the shallows.

"(Y/n)! It's you!" he chirped excitedly, sitting himself down close to the shore. Stepping towards him, I sat myself down beside him, the tips of the highest waves only reached my chest. Despite this I could feel it tightening, my chest clamping in an all too familiar fear, I gulped it down, pushed it aside and focused on the Prince sitting beside me.

"I've come to land every time the sun falls, but you weren't here" he spoke quietly, almost meekly, a strong tinge of disappointment in his voice. I hid the gentle smile that crossed my face, a strange sense of flattery fluttered through me at his disappointment of my disappearance.

"I'm sorry, my mum wasn't happy about me staying out all night, I had to stay inside or she'd never trust me again".

"Ah--" he sighed and dropped his head, breaking off into a quiet chuckle, shoulders trembling with the amused laugh. "That's a relief, I was afraid I had scared you off. You're the first human I've talked to before".

Slowly pulling my knees up to my chest, I rested my cheek atop the wet cap of my knee, eyes landing on the side of the male's face "speaking of, why did you stay when you saved me? Why didn't you just leave me in the cave?".

"That's a good question" his hand lifted to slowly rub the back of his neck, droplets of water slowly trickling down the broad expanse of his back.

"You were drowning for a reason right? I couldn't just leave a person who couldn't swim in a remote cave"

"Even if that meant that your kind might get discovered? What would happen if it was someone other than me? Someone who would kidnap you and release the information that mermaids really do exist?" I contested.

Blue eyes turned to meet my own, and corners of lips lifted slowly "I just had to have faith that you wouldn't".

--

Every night, when the moon was high in the sky and the mass of locals and tourists alike headed back to their rooms and the beach was void of life. I would slip out of my house, and spend hours upon end with Aryn. And begrudgingly, I made my way onto land and he made his way back into the depths when the first hint of light peeked over the ocean.

We continued in this routine, hiding from our parents, sneaking out to meet, and going home as though nothing had happened. As the days went on, the harder the routine grew. I found myself sitting by his side, listening to his stories and wishing that the sun would stay below the horizon for just a little bit longer.

Wishing that I wouldn't have to spend my days waiting for night to come around, that I wouldn't have to wait for my mother to fall asleep. Wishing that I wouldn't have to tip toe throughout my house, that I wouldn't have to struggle to see his face through the dark, that I could see the way the reflection of the sun on the water would reflect equally as clearly in his eyes. Or the brightness of the sky through the brightness of his smile.

My mother had begun asking questions, wondering why I would sleep all throughout the day, why I never headed to the beach any more. Why, if that was the case, my clothes still smelt of sea salt. To which I would give weak excuses, all of which she seemed to buy, or at least claimed to buy.

Sitting in the water with Aryn, months after our first meeting, the silence between was a tell tale sign that we were thinking the same thing. That perhaps once this had been enough, but now? Now it wasn't nearly enough. Scrounging up the hours to meet each other in a brisk exchange of words before fleeting home.

"Aryn" I mumbled quietly, staring up at the darkened sky that reflected open the ocean we had sat ourselves in. The male turned his head to look at me "yeah?"

"You know what I'm going to say, don't you?"

His silence was a clear answer "this isn't enough anymore" he murmured.

"Teach me how to float" I pushed myself up onto my feet, turning in the knee high water to face him. His expression a mixture between excited and confused "teach you to float, why?" he mumbled, shuffling deeper into the water.

"It's getting pretty boring sitting on the beach, don't you think?" a bright grin tugged at my lips, one which he quickly mirrored.

--

Floating, it seemed, was easier than I had expected. Before I knew it, the warm hands that supported me had disappeared from beneath my back and I was laying atop the surface of the water without struggle. It took but a minute or two for Aryn to join me, floating on his back by my side, we stared up at the glowing specks that decorated the sky.

I found myself calm, even as the tide drifted us further and further out to sea, I knew that no matter how far we managed to travel, Aryn would always swim me to safety. As our bodies bobbed along the water, we slowly grew apart; before I could voice my concern to the merman at my side, his hand reached out to take my own.

A warm contentment and a rush of security flooded through me as long fingers slipped through my own "don't drift away" was all he whispered.

My eyes fell closed with a gentle smile and to the wind I whispered "never".

--

He wasn't here.

No matter how many times I called out to him, no matter how far I had stepped into the water. I couldn't see the hint of red as his head peeked from the water, not the glowing eyes that drew me in, nor the bright smile that set me at ease.

Had his father found out? Had a human found out? Was he safe? Was he dead?

My lungs burned as short, rushed breath flooded from my mouth. Anxiety thrummed throughout my body, palms itching with a prickling nervousness. I tried to focus on what Aryn had taught me as I waded through the shallow water, to remain calm, to breathe steady, to trust the water.

Turning my back to the depths, eyes fluttering closed, I leaned back. Breath hitching in my throat as the cold water reached my ears, slowly, I pushed my feet up off of the ground. Floating upon the water, I gulped, the sound loud in my ears. Arms stretched out either side of me, I slowly pushed myself backwards, further out into the water.

"Aryn"

My voice left me shakily, barely loud enough to carry across the water. My feet kicked hesitantly, I was well into the water now, knowing that there was no chance of my feet reaching the ground should I straighten my body.

"Aryn! Where are you?" I called out, voice laced with fear and concern.

A loud boom rang out, my body stilling, arms tensing I came to a sudden stop in the water. The sky lit up in a brief, fear inducing crack of lightning. The waves that steadily bobbed my body grew harsher, with panicking breath, the waves threw me up, and crashed me down. With each hard bob of water, the depths inched higher up my face, inching towards me nose.

I arched my back, keeping my air filled lungs above the surface. The water only grew rougher, and the skies only grew darker, the intervals between each bang of thunder and flash of lightning grew shorter.

"Aryn please"

Tears of panic pricked at my eyes, flowing steayd down the sides of my face and mixing with the sea water. My body tensed, breath jolting in my throat in a loud hiccup as a long strand of lightning shot toward the ground somewhere in the distance.

Before I knew it, the waves had swallowed me whole.

In the panic, there was a brief moment of serenity, the cold water against my skin. The feeling of floating even as I continued to sink, as my eyes struggled to stay open - there were brief, blur filled moments, where faintly, somewhere in the distance I could see him.

His hand reaching out for me, his mouth stretched wide with a loud cry of my name. His sweet voice carrying through the water towards my ears.

Yet he was so far away, fighting against my heavy eyelids, I struggled to make out the glowing of his eyes, the lips I had hoped so desperately twist into that bright smile of his.

At least one last time.








--

The sand was cold on my back, the water colder on the rest of my skin. My body ached in a familiar pain that I couldn't quite place, heavy eyelids struggling to open, fighting against fatigue.

As they slowly cracked open, a deep, dark - almost black like blue met my sight. Yet, everywhere I turned my head, a dim glow of light, lit my path. I stared up at the surface of water, it was hard to determine where I was. Whether I was on land, staring down at the sea, or on the sea bed, staring up at the sky.

As I turned my head, the heavy drag of my hair in the water assured me that I was well into the depths. But still, the drum of panic that I had expected was nowhere to be found, air slowly and steadily filled my lungs. Hands pressing to the sand beneath me, I slowly pushed myself into a sitting position.

Brows furrowing at the tight restraint binding my legs together, light that followed my eyes lowered.

A curl of my toes translate to a twitch of a tail fin, as I stretched out my left leg, my right leg followed. Or what should had been my right and left leg.

Iridescence, shifting colours of beautiful scales were all that stared back at me. Suddenly, everything seemed to make sense, the lack of panic at the water that surrounded me. The air that continued to fill and rush out of my lungs, the lights that followed me eyes - they were my eyes.

Death had changed me, somehow, some way.

"You're awake"

Warmth flooded through my body, from the ends of my fingers to the tips of my tail fin. Hurriedly, I spun in the water, the feeling of my tail dragging througout the water was an unusual one.

Hair that contrasted against the dark of the water, bright blue eyes that lit up through the water, a smile of blinding happiness.

"Aryn?"

Slowly making his way towards me, his hands slipped into my own, warm thumbs brushing against my knuckles in gentle strokes of pure affection.

"I taught you how to float, guess it's time to teach you how to swim".

"I like the sound of that, but before we get down to business. Let me float with you?".

Hand clutched tightly in my own, slowly, he guided me towards the surface. My tail kicking hard and experimentally, easing the swim towards the surface.

We were a few ways out from the beach, the sound of excited children and exhasperated parents was distant, drowned out by the sound of the water.

And yet over the sound of the water, the sound of the children and the tourists, I could hear her voice. The sound of my name laced with desperation and anguish being called. Standing on the beach, at the edge of the water stood my mother, her hands cupped around her mouth.

Her face was aged, older than I had remembered her to be. Older than when I had last seen her. She called out to me, urging me back home.

"It's been 10 years since you died"

Aryn's voice startled me, my body jolting at his voice, body running cold at his news "what?", my voice left me in a weak, rushed exhale. "She never stopped looking for you, every day she'd come here, from dusk to dawn, sometimes she would stay all night. Sleep on the beach and wait for you to come walking out of the water".

My throat tightened, chest aching painfully as I looked to my mother "but-- why?" I whispered "why hasn't she stopped?".

"She's your mother, she loves you" he whispered.

"Your a mermaid now, we aren't allowed any interactions with the land animals but-- as an exception, I want you to call out to her, tell her you're okay and that she can stop looking for you".

"But we're so far away, she won't even hear me" I reasoned, glancined away from him and back to my mother. He let out a quiet chuckle, hands gently squeezing my own "you hear her, don't you? She'll hear you, go on".

With a deep breath of mustered courage, I cupped my hands around my mouth and called out to her loudly "Mum!", her body stopped dead "(Y/n)?!(Y/n)!!" she rushed into the water, stumbling and splashing as she rushed into the depths "where are you?!" she called out eagerly.

"I'm okay, mummy" I called out, she stopped in her tracks "I'm okay, so you can go home now, you can be happy now". Her quiet sob carried through the air, and as it hit my ears, my heart broke "please mummy, I'm safe, I'm happy, go home".

She collapsed to her knees in the water, her sobs loud, and broken "thank you, thank you, god, thank you".

Aryn's tug on my hand drew me back to him, and slowly, I turned to face him "you did it, I'm proud of you. You've cleaned up the last parts of your old life, now -- all you need to do is begin your new one".

His fingers slipped between my own "with me" he whispered. And as he tipped forward to press his forehead against my own, we disappeared below the water.

Never to be seen again.