15.) Leo Valdez & The Giant Fucking Snake
Leo had woken up on the cold, uneven cave floor, feeling as if he'd just gotten a full body massage from, well, Tartarus. He'd dreamt of some of his worst experiences in 4k HD surround sound, and now Nico was charging the goddess Nyx with nothing more than a sword and pure determination.
He was toast, of course.
Dark ribbons of Nyx's cloak shot out, wrapping around Nico's arms and legs, suspending him in the air. Nico's sword clanged to the ground, skidding right near Leo's feet.
"Such a pitiful choice, little hero," Nyx mused. "And a pitiful attempt at an attack. It's a shame that I have to kill a child of the Underworld, though I offered you more than enough mercy...."
The dark ribbons tightened their grip, and Nico winced, writhing against the hold. One strand of darkness seemed, for a moment, to caress his face, until it whipped past him fast enough to leave a nasty cut across his cheek. Blood, thicker and darker than Leo could have expected, began to seep from the wound. Leo felt around for the hilt of Nico's sword, gripping it tightly once he found it. Luckily, Nyx didn't seem to notice, too preoccupied with harming Nico. What Leo was to do now, though, he couldn't be sure.
"Hm," Nyx hummed, half interested. "How would you like it, then, Nico di Angelo? One thousand cuts? Or..." one of the ribbons slipped between his lips and Nico closed his eyes tight, shuddering like a child reliving a nightmare. He opened his eyes to reveal a glowing purple light, his muscles slack. "I could poke around in that brooding mind of yours, let you see your sister again, maybe? Of course...you didn't really get to see her die, did you? That would be fun to watch together...you see, if I can't have you all kill each other, I can just have you kill yourself-"
Leo didn't have a plan. All he knew was that he wouldn't stand (or lay, rather) for another moment of this. Gripping the sword he shot up-at least, as quickly as his shaking, tired legs would let him-and slashed at the dark ribbons. He would have liked to think he said some kind of cool catchphrase like: "Say 'hello' to my little friend!" But he didn't-half because he was too honed in on the battle at hand, and half because he was pretty sure that catchphrase was already taken.
The Stygian Iron moved through the darkness as if it were nothing-much like it had with his old boss. But if he could get a couple more slashes in-
Leo felt his feet lift off the ground for a moment before he was flung about ten feet across the room, landing with a sickening crack against the stone wall. Impressions weren't something in his comedy forte, but his back did a great impression of a Rice Crispy Treat in that moment: snap, crackle, pop.
Leo groaned, starting to get back up before being pinned to the wall by the goddess, Nico's sword held to his throat.
"Foolish boy," she hissed as Leo gasped for air, trembling but desperate not to move for the sharpness of the blade. "What is forged of the Styx cannot harm me the way it can a meager monster. You insult me with your weapon and your stupidity in wielding it!"
She pressed the blade further against Leo's skin, toying with him, a malicious light dancing in her black eyes as Leo cried out.
"And to think," she crooned. "You could have been down here to bring back your mother. Instead you're here, breathing your last with these so-called heroes...who only want you here for the very curse that killed her..."
Leo fought the urge to surge against her, to try to recapture Nico's sword, but he could spot her game from mile away. She wanted him to move, like a mouse in a trap activating the kill switch.
But he wouldn't be lying if he hadn't thought about it-bringing his mother back. They were bringing Hazel back, after all, so why not his mom, too? Then again, it'd be impossible to find her amongst the billions of spirits. And even if they did, Leo knew she wouldn't want to be brought back. Despite all the disadvantages she'd had in life, she never liked to take loopholes; she'd built herself from the ground up, just like when she started her shop. Every day, Leo wanted nothing more than to see her, talk to her...but he knew that by bringing her back, in that she may never forgive him.
Leo looked into the goddess's eyes-they were entirely black, the only light being what reflected around the dim room. The blackness even reminded him of Nico-how black his eyes were, the only light coming from a quiet, white-screened infomercial in a crappy hotel room. But there was a warmth there, a familiarity and protection in Nico's gaze. It made Leo trust him despite how he pulled away-it made Leo jump up to fight for him without a second thought.
"My mother loved me," Leo rasped. "She-she still does, I know. And my friends do, too."
"Then why are they not fighting for you, little hero?" Nyx asked, the lack of emotion bringing a thick silence to the cave-and Leo realized she was right. Leo had jumped up to fight for Nico, but now that he was here, toeing the thin line between life and death resting against Nico's blade, the owner of the sword was nowhere to be found.
Just then, behind the all-engrossing shadow of the goddess, Leo could hear the rattling of chains being dropped against the stone. The light in the room increased tenfold, so much so that Leo was left squinting in that direction. There, he could see Nico and Piper on the ground, holding the chains they'd just broken. Standing in front of them, at least ten feet tall and bathed in a rich golden light, was the god Apollo.
"Game over, Nyx," the god's voice boomed across the cavern.
Nyx wailed at the sight of such a bright light, pulling the blade away from Leo's neck. Just when he thought he was (mostly) unharmed, the goddess pushed the sword forward, stabbing Leo in his side.
The goddess dropped the sword as if it were nothing but a toothpick. She pulled away to battle her newer, stronger opponent as Leo crumpled to the ground, useless and blinded by pain.
So, they freed Apollo-the prophecy never went beyond that. He was out of his little bind, but Leo wasn't promised the same security. In a moment of anger, a snip of thread, Leo's life could be taken from him by a vengeful goddess.
Leo's vision blurred as he clutched his side, feeling the thick, hot blood against his hand. He wouldn't lie-he cried like a baby, all the jokes everyone had made about dying hitting him like a pile of bricks.
No...no, no, they didn't die. Demigods didn't actually die. They got injured and tortured but persevered through the powers of love and friendship or something. They left their battles dirty and disheveled before ordering nachos and laughing about it.
He pulled his hand away, his palm covered in blood deep red enough to be black, the pungent smell of iron making him hold himself back from hurling.
Nico and Piper fell to the floor next to him on either side.
"Leo!" Piper shook him, her eyes tearing up. "No, no, no-hey, you're okay-look at me, you're okay..."
Leo fought the urge to close his eyes-death didn't seem too bad right about now, as calm and enveloping as a bubble bath. Still, he hated seeing Piper like this-and Nico, who was tearing through his bag like a storm, looking for something, anything that would help.
"Sing me a song, Beauty Queen?" Leo managed, his voice raspy. "I wanna go out Hunger Games style."
Piper scoffed, though she smiled in spite of her tears. "I think my singing would-would kill you faster, idiot. Nico-"
"Here!" Nico took a small baggie containing what looked like a lemon bar out of his backpack-Ambrosia squares. He broke some off and held them to Leo's mouth-they were a little crushed, but the taste was still there, like warm popcorn and the excitement of a movie.
"It's not going to be enough," Nico said to Piper, his expression grave. "If we feed him enough to heal the wound, it'll burn him alive. If we don't...he'll die from his wound."
"Thanks, doctor Nico," Leo managed woozily, his heart pounding. His mind roved and raced over his life leading up to this. He should leave the squares for his quest-mates and die nobly, something much easier said than done.
Leo should be the one to die, because he was the only one here with a human body count. This was the price he had to pay, karma coming for him finally after years of torture. Still, the idea of death had him panicking, terrified and crying like the eight year old that night in the machine shop.
"Enough!" Nyx's voice boomed across the cavern. The three demigods looked her away, though her form was blurry in Leo's partially-healed state. She had made a blade of her own out of shadows, though its size had diminished in the face of Apollo's light. In fact, Nyx herself appeared weaker every moment, so unused to anything but total darkness in her cavern.
"When darkness covers the sky and the sun fades to nothing, it is your greatest enemy that will work his will over those who remain, Phoebus Apollo," Nyx hissed. "I'm sure you've missed your long-dead friend-so why not say hello?"
"Oh, gods," Piper stood, effectively dropping Leo's head on the ground-which didn't hurt at all, thank you for asking. She took out her knife, though her hand was trembling. Leo couldn't see what she was looking at, but as Nico joined her, he could see his face; his friend, in all his power, was left slack-jawed and terrified.
"Leave me," Leo started to stand, his side screaming in pain. "I'll distract whatever is-"
"No!" Nico countered, picking up his sword, which was still dripping with Leo's blood. "I'm not leaving you-not with that-"
"Run!" Apollo ordered, and Piper and Nico helped Leo up completely, wrapping an arm over each of their shoulders to help him walk. It was then Leo could see what was rapidly approaching: sliding from the shadows of the cavern was the same monster from Leo's dream. It was a massive snake, perhaps fifteen feet tall, with glowing yellow eyes and fangs longer than Leo's entire body.
(Oh, great. It was the big baddie from the worst book in the worst series, the name of which was blanking on Leo in that moment. Still, the thing could kill him with a single bite-campers would remember "oh, he got killed by that giant snake, like from that kids' book about wizards!" That had to be his own personal Tartarus.)
Leo tried hobbling along a little faster, though it was a tad inconvenient with the continually bleeding stab wound. The god Apollo had started out at a breakneck speed, though when he turned and saw the three struggling, he sighed, muttering a few choice words before grabbing Leo.
Leo had considered himself someone who was slowly getting over his once-desperate dreams of hyper-masculinity. He didn't need to lift himself into a state of godlike beefiness or attract all the ladies in order to be cool, or like himself...right?
Being carried in the arms of an ultra-powerful hot god as if he were Lois Lane emasculated Leo in a way no amount of therapy would fix.
Still, Leo was just grateful for the escape. For once, he was a teenager who decided that being momentarily insecure might be better than dying.
Not by much, though.
They passed the bright office space of Hypnos momentarily before being plunged into the darkness of his tomb. Leo noticed that Apollo had slowed down a little, and his own eyelids were starting to droop. Apollo was really warm in this cold hallway, and it'd be really nice to-
"Snap out of it!" Piper called from somewhere in the darkness, her shortness of breath borderline hysterical. "If you fall asleep, you'll get eaten by the giant snake!"
That proved to be motivation enough. Not long after, the group emerged from the temple, and Apollo dropped Leo onto the ground, seemingly forgetting how fragile even half-mortal beings were.
Leo coughed, trying to recover the air knocked out of him. Python rapidly approached, only slowed by the crumbling of the very foundation of Hypnos's temple atop his scales.
"You really had to get stabbed, didn't you, hero?" Apollo asked, half-muttering to himself as he pulled up Leo's shirt to examine his wound. Now that Leo could really look at him, he could see that the god did look disheveled from his kidnapping-his hair wasn't quite perfect, his clothes covered in patches of magical darkness, several cuts across his body leaking golden blood. Even so, he was really pretty-and while he shouldn't be thinking this while bleeding out, his teenaged mind couldn't help but race at the thought of this hot god pulling up his shirt.
"Maybe the next time we see each other like this, you won't be looking into a stab wound?" Leo managed, holding up a hand to shoot a feeble finger gun.
"You-" Apollo paused before shaking his head. "I don't have time for this," he started murmuring an ancient hymn, running the warm tips of his fingers over Leo's wound.
Leo closed his eyes, the darkness of Tartarus blinking out to the vibrant light and colors of some field in the middle of nowhere. He'd run away again, but he for once wasn't worried about food or shelter-because how could he think of his own human urges ripping through his body when he could smell the flowers and hear the birdsong? Just as the hymn came to its too-quick end, Leo wanted to keep it on recording to replay forever-it was a song he'd never go mad repeating, no matter how many times he did so. His wound appeared healed-running his fingers over it, it felt as if he'd just gotten stitches-which, ow. And even if his strength had mostly returned, Leo imagined he would never feel so close to godhood again.
It was too short of a reprieve, though, before Apollo pulled away and joined the battle again without another word. Leo forced himself to stand, his legs shaking as his vision continued to blur. Nico had been distracting the snake with the help of Hazel, who had rejoined the crew much to Leo's relief. Nico slashed at Python, ducking just in time to avoid its snapping fangs. He'd summoned about a dozen skeletons in Roman armor, though they quickly became piles of bones as Python tore through them. Piper held her knife at a distance, searching for weak spots to strike, stricken at the thought that she'd have to get closer.
And Leo wasn't doing anything.
He watched, and pondered what to do...but he did nothing.
What was the point of Apollo saving his life if he was nothing but a witness?
Unless...
He sped off in the other direction, leaving the battle in favor of the rubble that was once Hypnos's tomb.
"Leo!" Piper called, ducking and rolling Python's gargantuan fangs snapped at her. "What the hell are you doing?"
Leo's heart was pounding so hard in his chest, it felt warm in his throat. He didn't have any idea what he was doing, to be honest. But if he could find something, anything-
A flicker of light caught his attention, and Leo looked down to see one of Hypnos's Dream TVs, smashed in the rubble, but still half-working. His mind wandered down under the depths of the ruins, hoping that Hypnos had turned out okay, and that he could recover. He was a god, after all, a little rubble wouldn't kill him. He'd probably be pretty pissed about the destruction of his temple, though.
Still, what to do with this little television. Seeing as Leo didn't want to get too close with his knife or a palm flame, and he didn't have enough time or materials to make a bomb...
This might be the stupidest plan Leo had ever thought of, but it was better than nothing.
Leo ran back towards the group, clutching his broken TV as if it were the key to everything. He probably looked like a wild animal, or one of those Black Friday shoppers who just knocked over someone's grandma for a half off blender.
"Nico, get its mouth open!" Leo called.
"Not exactly hard to do!" Nico fired back, his voice and his slower movements showing how tired he was becoming. Python seemed to be focusing only on the son of Hades, teasing Apollo, making it harder for the god to attack with full force without hurting one of his demigod companions. If Leo could just distract it for a moment, and Nico could get out of the front lines...
"Got it!" Piper called, vaulting up the rubble without a second thought, leaping the rest of the way, landing on the back of Python's head. She raised her knife up and struck it down into Python's head, hitting a sensitive spot of thinner scales based on the way the snake opened its glowing maw, letting out a screeching hiss.
Leo was momentarily stunned, both by the blinding light that seemed to emanate from Python as well as Piper's bravery. The moment didn't last long though, before Leo lit a fire between both his hands and chucked the TV as far and as hard as he could, successfully getting it lodged into the monster's throat. The heat made the TV fizzle with electricity, creating an explosion just small enough to throw off Python. He flung his head around, choking on Leo's weapon, tossing Piper into the air as if she were nothing but a pest. She landed momentarily on her feet in the rubble before crumpling, unconscious.
Nico rolled out of the way just as Apollo notched more than a dozen arrows on his bow, firing them at Python at once. He did so again, hitting from above and below. The arrows seemed to move at his command, regardless of where he was aiming, sticking firmly in the vulnerable points between hard scales. Python screeched once more, flailing in agony before finally collapsing against the rubble of Hypnos's tomb.
"Daughter of," Python started, his voice raspy in a way that any snake's would be, naturally. A cold chill ran its fingers down Leo's spine-why the hell was this snake able to talk? He supposed he shouldn't be surprised at anything at this point, but his voice still seemed to drop the temperature about twenty degrees.
"Quiet, you!" Apollo ordered, his foot pressed to the beast's fang.
"Daughter of jewels, your home lies west,
A feat to smother the fire's breath,
The red rose leads troops through trial,
And heroes meet under a fatal spiral,
Two sides of one coin, let one remain,
And failure brought with the ivory rain."
Just after the last syllable left Python's forked tongue, the snake collapsed, eyes open but glassy. A silence fell over the group apart from recovering their breath, and they glanced at each other hesitantly over the monster's corpse. If they acknowledge what the beast said, it'd make it real, and if they didn't...it'd come to fruition anyway, probably.
"Alright, I'll bite," Leo called, dusting himself off. "Did that thing just give us another prophecy, when we're not even done with the first one?" He swore, kicking a rock, which skipped until it knocked against the rubble. And speaking of-Piper.
Leo rushed over to tend to Piper, who did not seem too happy about coming to. She groaned, rubbing her head where it hit the rocks before looking down at her ankle. "Is that...is that supposed to look like that?"
Leo looked down at her twisted ankle and was met with a mixture of nausea and sympathy pains. "Nope. Hold on, Beauty Queen, I got you," he dug around his bag for his own ambrosia squares, breaking some off and handing it to her. "Dude, when you jumped on Python like that-that was so cool, I'm never letting you forget it."
"Thanks," Piper grinned, though her eyes appeared a little distant, a little sad. "I was just standing there with my knife, and worried that I'd be useless, and..."
"It's okay," Leo insisted. "I was, too. All I did was light a TV on fire-you're the real hero. You've saved us so many times, Piper..."
Piper nodded, still seeming doubtful, though more reassured by Leo's words. Nico came over, sitting on one of the flatter rocks in the rubble beside Piper, Apollo and Hazel following to join the group.
"So," Nico started, defeated in all ways but physical. "We got another prophecy."
"What?" Piper asked, and Leo almost wished that he'd been knocked out for it, too. "You're kidding! We're not even done yet!"
"I'm sorry," Apollo said lowly. "If I hadn't been weakened by those chains, if I could have slain Python earlier-"
"It's no use," Hazel interjected. "We would have gotten the quest anyway. Besides, no one here was specifically called out...besides me."
A silence fell over the group, stretching with a tension that couldn't be broken by a joke, though Leo, for once, didn't have one. Hazel was right, it called for the daughter of jewels. They'd be getting her out into the world, into a mortal body again...all so that she could be a pawn of a prophecy like the rest of them.
"Mhm," Apollo hummed, nodding and crossing his arms. He looked at the three living demigods currently recovering on the ground, and though the god looked seventeen, he had a certain fatherly disapproval that couldn't be masked by de-aging magic. "And can I ask you three why you brought a ghost with you down here? I don't imagine your father would approve of this decision, Nico di Angelo."
Nico hesitated, his mouth pressed in a thin line. Leo's heart skipped a beat-surely Apollo wouldn't banish Hazel's ghost, or punish Nico, not after everything they'd been through. But gods couldn't be trusted the way demigods could trust each other-and Leo had to step up for his friend.
"It was my idea," Leo said. Apollo's startlingly blue eyes fell to him, and though Leo still thought of him as painfully hot, he could see there was definitely more to him. An ancient magic lingered in his gaze, suggesting he could undo his healing with a wave of his hand; he could bring Leo to his knees with diseases humanity hadn't even experienced before.
Still, Leo had gotten this far. He'd be like his great-grandfather, who he was so disconnected from, and be there for Hazel. "She was judged unfairly, she chose Asphodel to even out her reward with her mother's punishment." He explained. "We're giving her another shot at mortality." He added, the decision a statement rather than a question or request.
Apollo's gaze lingered before his eyes flitted over to Hazel, who held his look. The god then sighed, shaking his head. "Whatever, I don't care anymore. If asked, I'll just say I was blackmailed into letting it happen, then you guys can take the fall."
"Gee, thanks," Leo fired back. Nico stood and smacked his arm lightly, reminding him that he was talking with a god. "Oh, right. Thank you, Lord Apollo."
"You're welcome," Apollo backed away from the rubble, Hazel drifting close behind. Nico helped Piper up, and Leo wrapped one of her arms around his shoulder, the pair helping her to walk while her ankle healed.
The group took one last look at Python, the monster taking an especially long time to crumple to dust due to his sheer size.
"Its prophecy might not be true," Apollo started. "We won't know for sure until it regenerates-though hopefully that'll be a long, long time from now. It's not always a guarantee that it'll be able to manipulate the oracle. Maybe...maybe it's pulling my leg."
Leo didn't like the uncertainty in the god's tone. Should the gods not know everything at all times? Was this world entirely ran by beings that were only slightly more powerful and intelligent than the demigods?
"We'll have to see," Leo replied shakily, starting forward with the weight of his exhaustion as well as supporting an injured Piper. "For now, let's get the hell out of here."
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