"We need to find you a husband who is close to our family, so that we can monitor your well being and can place our trust in him to take good care of you. Secondly who would not spread rumors about your disappearance if per chance you go back to you time. Also be supportive in making you understand the lifestyle here instead of questioning you " said maasa.

I nodded my head subtly at that.

"Then will you tell that person about me." I questioned looking up into her eyes with slight fear.

"No dear that won't be required as the person I have in mind already knows about you." She said with a smile on her face as if contemplating my future happiness.

My heart dropped down into an abyss void of any silver line. I wished mother earth to swallow me and asked the Gods whom I had thanked right this morning as to why they are playing such games with me. I knew that the person she was talking about was Rudra, since he was the only person who knew about me apart from her. It was wrong to say I was shocked, in fact I was horrified.

Maasa looked at my face and thought that I was worried that apart from her somebody else knew about me too.

"Don't worry dear it's no one outside the family. It's our own Rudra. I can trust him with my life, so who better I can give you to then him." She confirmed my worst nightmare, smiling at me with reassurance. I couldn't tell her that the man she had chosen for me hated me.

"Does he know that you have chosen him for me?" I asked with my head down as I didn't want her to see my thoughts reflected on my face.

"Don't you worry dear I have already talked to him and he had accepted readily. Moreover your taisa is also quite happy with the association. We just needed your confirmation to go ahead."

I found no escape route through this dreadful situation, I was literally cornered. I wondered why Rudra had accepted to marry me. Maybe he would help me escape this as I was dead sure that he hated me.

"Can I talk to him before you declare my acceptance to all ... maasa?" I said hesitating that I might be acting too forward to question their decision.

"Sure dear. I will send him in directly" she said as she got up and went out of the room to call him. Her joyous tone already raised red flags in my brain. It would be hard to convince her otherwise as she I knew could not even imagine that any girl would reject her beloved nephew.

Left alone I couldn't sit still, so got up to roam the length of the room thinking of what I would say to him. I didn't want to marry him but I couldn't think of an alternate solution. I could understand that what maasa said was in fact true. If something happened to her I would be all alone caught up in the situation, unable to explain my circumstance to anyone. What if someone did meet me from the village of maasa then all my secrets would be out and I would be considered a fraud. Rudra was a solution and I could survive being with him for some time. I could stay with maasa after my marriage while he stayed with his family. Young brides I had heard stayed with their parents even after marriage and went to their in law's  home only after reaching adulthood. I could always avail that tradition. The problem would start only if I was unable to return back.

"You wanted to talk to me "came the dreaded voice. I knew he would come but hearing his voice jolted my heart and I stood still as a statue. My face was towards the wall but I didn't turn around.

"What is the problem?" he asked in a cold low voice.

I closed my eyes suddenly feeling mentally tired and asked "Why did you agree to marry me?"

"What...! What kind of question is that? ... When kakisa asks me something I never say no." said Rudra drowning my hopes even further.

I had not accepted him to marry me for love but at least there could have been a better reason something more humane. Something more knightly, like wanting to save me or something else in that tone.

"But you hate me so much, so how could you bear marrying me?" I persisted, now not expecting anything gentle about the answer. I felt myself on an emotional suicide mission.

"There was no other option. I can't let Vikram destroy his life by marrying you. So it had to be me."

It was even more brutal then what I had expected.

"So I better tell maasa that I can't marry because I don't want to destroy your life too for my own benefit. I can't marry a person who hates me so much. It will be a living death for me. I simply can't..." A sob escaped my mouth involuntarily, even though I tried to hide my tears.

I heard him move towards me but I stayed my ground and didn't turn around.

"I don't hate you." He said in a gentler tone.

I turned around to verify his words but was taken aback by how close he was standing. I tried to take a step away from him but as luck would have it I lost my balance. Strong arms held me tight saving me from the fall. I looked up at his face and saw him staring back. For a while I was almost hypnotized by the gentleness in his eyes but reality struck as he slowly put me away.

Something fluttered in my stomach, I suddenly felt nervous and confused.

He turned his back towards me and said "I don't hate you. I just can't burden my brother with your kind of background. I can't see him kill himself with despair if after marrying him you vanished suddenly."

I tried to assemble these thoughts in my mind in a logical order trying to find if there could be a hidden deeper meaning in them.

"Don't expect any kind of love in this marriage. I don't believe in it. I promise to protect you from all difficulties and give you the security of my name. As my wife you would have all the privileges I can afford." 

There you go I thought , painfully clear words with no hidden depth.

"But what if I fall in love?" I murmured.

He turned around all of a sudden and closed the distance between us. He grabbed my arm tightly.

"Then you will inform me about the privileged person before you run away with him" he hissed through his clenched teeth. "I promise to get you married to him even if I have to take the blame on myself. I expect complete fidelity in a marriage. You will meet lots of people during the two months before marriage. Find whosoever you like. I will not break my promise but after marriage I would not tolerate a wandering eye from my wife. Do you understand?"

He shook me as he spoke with his eyes blazing in anger. I had asked about falling in love with him and not somebody else, but then again I didn't correct him. With his kind of attitude it would indeed be difficult to fall in love with him. If it was possible I would have taken him up on his offer, but I could not betray maasa's trust so I was stuck with him.

He still stared at me with so much anger that I felt frightened. His hand had also tightened painfully around my arm.

"You are hurting me "I whimpered looking towards my arm where he held.

I could see mild confusion in his eyes at my words but he quickly released his hold as if burnt when realization struck him. I had been watching him intently through all this, otherwise would never have believed these myriad display of emotions as he made his face impassive again.

"You will appear happy in front of all for the sake of kakisa. You will not disclose our agreement to anyone. Not even my sisters." His voice cut through me like steel but who was I to question his one sided agreement.

I wanted to provoke him for his insult as he enunciated that I would betray all the kindness I got from everyone and run away like a self-centered hussy.

"When I fall in love I would rather approach maasa directly then hatch plans with you." I said tilting my chin up, challenging him to say otherwise. I could have used the word 'if' in place of 'when' but I wanted to shake the confidence of this arrogant man.

He turned away again at that but said in a low steely voice "You will come to me. Do you understand? I don't want kakisa to get hurt by your bumbling ways. I will handle the matter in a proper fashion, so that no one is hurt and the family honor is intact ."

I simply nodded my head.

The situation which I would never let arise was being discussed as if it had already risen. Many innovative points came to my mind to irritate him further but I felt it better to let the matter finish then and there because if I was actually stuck with him for a lifetime, I didn't want my life to be one great big mess.

"What...! You agree or not." He said turning around, making me realize that his back had been towards me.

I again nodded my head and looked towards him.

He stared at me as if accessing if I could be trusted or not. I stared back at him defiantly to show him that I was not scared of him. A whole minute must have passed when I saw a slow smile trying to creep up his lips, which he tried to subdue.

Our staring contest was suddenly interrupted by a knock and before I could normalize myself, two bodies rushed towards me hugging me tightly.

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