This is like a prequel to the last chapter!! this happened like 5 years before! :P

TWs: bad parenting, abandonment, swear words, implied using wrong pronouns/dead naming?.. idk Lee technically hasn't changed their name yet but :P
If missing any tell Leefy!!

(also im totally not projecting everything into Lee, nahhh)

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Deer diary,

its been awhile since I written here. but I decided to write since i think my birthday has past?  I heard Mister say it is winter soon. My birth day is in fall, so i think im 10 now? 

Mister always looks at me with a mean look in his eyes but he gives me food every week so that must mean he doesn't hate me! Sure he insults me and calls me an acident but he probably doesnt mean it!

Mother and Father hasn't visited yet, I asked Mister about it before he left again, he said that t̶h̶e̶r̶e̶   they are coming back from their bisnis trip tomorrow.

my parents own a company, so that is why they re always busy. that is why. they still care about me, just busy, that is all.

anyways, its knight time now, good bye diary!

-#### Fy

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I sigh as I put the book down on top of a drawer with a smile across my face, tomorrow my parents will come back! Finally! I can't wait! Maybe they will bring back some snacks for me!

I run up the stairs, brush my teeth while staring at my reflection (my hair is growing longer again!! It's all the way to my shoulders now!), change into some more comfortable clothes that are 2 sizes too big before flopping down on the bed and end the day. 

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I hear some rumbling downstairs, waking me up, it's surprisingly quite loud. It sounds like someone is searching the house, rummaging through drawers and making a ruckus. I probably should check it out.

I let out a long yawn before flipping myself over and snuggling closer to the blankets, maybe 5 more minutes? Yeah.. 5 more minutes and then I'll start the day.

SLAM!!

"WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS?! Darling, can you tell me WHY, our son has this BULLSHIT writing?? He can't even spell properly!! What kind of failure of a son did we raise?"
A loud, booming (and scary) voice echoes up the stairs. It seems pissed off. 

Oh.. That doesn't sound good.. What's father mad about now? I should go check it out.

He's talking about you. He's angry. You disappointed him. You're a failure to him. Nothing more than a boy that always seems to let everyone down. Mother and father would have been better off if you were never born.

...
My mind is foggy.. I should go downstairs..

I open the bedroom door, not bothering to change clothes or anything.
Walking down the hallway, the yelling gets louder the closer I get, until I stop right in front of the stairs, looking down where my parents are.

There's a book open thrown carelessly on the ground, the two towering over it.
That's my book! That's my diary!! They didn't read it right?

"Darling, I know, it is horrendous and I am appalled that our son would be writing these things. It's truly a shame to our family name."
Mother says in her honeyed-tone, it's sickening..

So they have read it.. They weren't supposed to read it! They weren't supposed to read any of it! It's my diary!! Not theirs!! I've poured all my heart into it!! My secrets are in there!! I never intended for them to read them!!

My vision is a little blurry as tears start to form as I feel anger starting to form.
My hands tremble a bit but I ignore it as I wipe them away. They can't see me cry, I'm not allowed to cry.

Father gets disappointed in me if I cry.
    You're pathetic, ####, crying is for babies. You're not a baby are you?
I slowly walk down the stairs, looking down at the steps instead of straight ahead, feeling a bit ashamed.

"Oh speak of the devil. What do you think you've been doing the entire time we've been gone, ####? What did I say about growing your hair? You're a boy! And boys don't have long hair now do they?"

That argument always pisses me off to no end.
"Bu-"
"No buts!!"
Didn't even get to finish my sentence..

"And how come you still don't know how to spell some of the most simplest of words? Imagine what the people would think if they knew what a disgrace of a son the Fy family has!! I can hear the rumours already, 'Oh dear, have you heard? You know that majestic and glorious family business the Fy has? Well apparently they have a son that can't even spell cat!!' You probably can't imagine how much damage that will do to our company, ####, you just can't imagine can you? You really are a disgrace.."
Mother talks in a way that's fast and leaves no room for arguments, which is fine. Not that I am allowed to talk back.

Father speaks up in his cold and uncaring voice.
"Honestly, I think we should just burn these shitty piece of writing."
He points to the book on the ground while mother nods.

No no no!! That book is my everything!! It's the only thing I have!! I can't let them destroy it!

I quickly grab the book from the ground, hugging it tightly to my chest. My parents are angry but I ignore them, they're always angry about something anyways.

"####!!!! WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING, MISTER?"

"Oh come on now, ####, hand that book to us won't you?"

"LISTEN TO YOUR MOTHER, GIVE THAT BACK!!"

Their words echo in my head as I squeeze it more tightly. I don't wanna give it back. I don't wanna give it back. I'm not gonna give it back.

Mother lets out a heavy sigh as she takes a step forward.
"Oh ####, you know that I love you right? Nobody loves you more than your parents. We're only doing what's best for you."
She's using her sweet and innocent tone, as if she's done nothing wrong ever. She's just pretending to get me to let my guard down.

A soft smile is across her face as she reaches a hand towards me, motioning to hand her the book I'm holding on for dear life.
"Come on darling, give me that book. I promise I won't burn it."
Liar, it's all false promises. She's never honest.

...But if she's speaking the truth now..

It's not the smartest of moves but father gets mad easily. I hand the book over.

====================

"He really is easy to fool huh.."
Mother and father laugh as if all is well in the world, raising a toast to the small fire burning on the ground.
The fire would've been beautiful if it wasn't for the fact it's my stuff they're burning.

I'm watching through the windows from inside since I know they'll get more mad if I even dare to step foot outside.

====================

It's only been a day and they're already leaving? All they did was throw my stuff in a fire and cut my hair. And they're leaving already?

I watch teary eyed as they abandon me again. My heart feels heavy as I feel empty and numb.

Hopefully they'll come back soon, I'm gonna miss them.
I hope they never come back they're such horrible people.
I love them, they're my parents, they love me too (false) and they'll come back for me again soon I'm sure!
...

I hate them.

...

They left me.. They left me alone again.

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Word count: 1180

Also!! side note, this will be the last chapter I'm writing about Lee.