Chapter 29 - The Shirt

Tris

One minute there's darkness, then there's just light. Bright, white light.

My brain tells me to panic, to expect the worst of this place.

The first thing I do is rip the object that covers part of my face off.

They're trying to drug me, just like he did. I will never let anything near my nose ever again.

I try to scream, but I only manage to force air from my lungs in an exasperated wheeze.

My vision is much clearer now than it was before. I can see everything to its full color. Nothing is dark or blurry.

I start to pull off little dots that are plastered to my skin. I grab five of them by their wires and rip them off. They pull off painlessly with the feeling of a sticky residue being left on the skin where they were.

I don't know what their plan is, but I'm not letting any more of these toxins get into me that already have.

A machine next to me starts to beep frantically, then another one next to that starts as well.

I only can hear the frantic machines along with my pulse beating in me ears.

It's too quiet.

Is this their plan of torture? Locking me away to die with all of these wires sending toxins into my body?

I pull an IV with a massive needle on the end of it from my arm, and one from my hand, and another from my other arm.

There's still one IV in my foot. It sticks out of the end of a huge cast that goes up to my mid thigh. It isn't until now that I notice the searing pain that shoots from my knee to my foot, my whole leg feeling like there's tiny needles being moved around in it.

Again, I try to scream, but all that comes from my mouth this time is a quiet cry.

People run into the room from a door across the room. Again, I try to scream, but all that I hear is a animal-like cry come from my mouth.

I want to yell at them, no, scream at them. Ask them what the hell they want with me.

Another moan comes from me as I try to get my voice to work, but it's like my voice is gone.

"It's okay, Beatrice. You're okay. You're safe here." The one woman says, stroking the top of my head.

I want to scream at her.

What the heck do you want from me?

Why can't I just be free from all of this?

What are you drugging me with?

Where the heck am I?

Where's Tobias?

I want to ask her all of these things, but all that I do is wheeze.

The woman picks up the mask that was on my face and moves to put it back on me.

She's trying to drug me like he did!

I fling my arms at her in some kind of attempt to get her away from me with that mask. She backs away quickly and both of my hands fly to my nose, the familiar feeling of fear trickling in the back of my mind.

My nose...

"Shh. I'm sorry. I won't put the oxygen mask on you. It's alright. I understand." She says.

She understands?

I hit her one arm off of me with my one hand, the other still on my nose, fearing that she'll come after me trying to put something up it again.

"Beatrice. Tris. It's okay. I'm not going to hurt you. I'm here to help, we all are. You're never going to be treated the way you were in that building ever again, I promise."

Well then why the heck am I forcibly here with needles and weird wire things all over me? All this woman says is lies.

She tries to put her hand on my head again, but I hit it away, cowering with both hands on my nose in fear for what thing she'll bring out to hurt me with for hitting her arm.

I tense, awaiting the blow from her fist or some kind of weapon.

I clench my eyes shut and try to scream again. A loud wheeze makes my chest hurt and I break out coughing and gasping for air.

It's like my lungs have turned on me, resisting any air that enters my lungs.

Suddenly, my stomach lurches. I gag in between coughing and gasping for air.

"Take deep breaths." I jump when I feel a soft hand on my back. The voice is a woman's, but it is different than the other woman that was in the room with the mask. "Shh. Calm down. Steady breaths. Shh." The woman says as she rubs my back.

The simple gesture causes so much pain through my back. I wince as I stop gagging, my coughing still burning a hole through my lungs.

"I'm going to have to call your boyfriend, Four. He's going to be so happy you're awake. He sat with you earlier. Could you hear anything he was saying? He was here for hours. He did go back to Dauntless for a good two weeks, but he came back today, and I guess at the right time."

"T-- T---" I try to say Tobias's name, but I can't even make out one letter. My jaw falls weak as my mouth can't form any words.

"It's okay. Just relax. I'll call him and I'm sure he'll come down. If you can stay calm, I may be able to allow him to come in and see you. You have to stay calm, Tris. You've been asleep in a coma for almost a month. Your heart can't take the stress your putting it through by panicking, and you could seriously hurt yourself if you raise your blood pressure any more. Are you cold?"

I try to answer, but only air moves from my mouth.

"I'll bring you a blanket anyways. It's pretty chilly in here."

She leaves and returns with a couple thick blankets. I'm quick to pull them up to my chin right when she lays them on me. The warmth immediately lets me relax although whatever their real plan of torture here still haunts me in the back of my mind.

A sharp pain radiates through my leg suddenly and I tense, crying out. I don't know what it is or what causes it. It just hurts.

"What is it. What hurts?" The woman asks.

Air rushes out of my mouth and my mouth stays open as I try to answer her. No words come from my mouth. I groan in frustration, but then bite my lip in pain as the sharp pain continues.

"Ugh. You took the IV that had pain killers in it out of your arm." She says and I feel her looking at me, but I don't look at her. I feel my lip bleed as my hands go to my nose and my whole body tenses in pain.

"Don't tense up, Beatrice. The muscles in your leg are injured, and tensing them will make them hurt more." She says and I hear her messing around with metallic things. The clanking of the objects reminds me of when I had gotten 'files' done by David and one of his workers. Fear trickles down my spine at the treacherous memory.

I hear some things snap, and then a few seconds later I feel a fluid going into my foot, spreading numbness almost instantly as it travels through and up my leg.

The memory of the files still haunts me, although the pain has subsided, I stay hidden, in fear that this woman may also decide that she needs files similar to what David wanted for me.

"It's okay. You're alright." The woman coos and strokes my head. I barely hear her speak as the pulsing sound of my heart fills my ears.

I hear the woman walk away and return. "Here, Tris." She says.

I smell the fabric before I even feel my hands clutching it for dear life.

It's the smell I've associated with safety ever since the war.

The smell I could count on to protect me from anything and everything.

It would comfort me when he would wrap his arms around me and tell me that we would always be okay.

It smells like him.

Tobias.

I clutch the fabric and hold it to my cold face, inhaling through it with every strained breath I take.

It must be the shirt that I held onto when he first saved me from that building.

I didn't want him to leave me.

He let these people take me.

I need him to save me again.

But most of all,

I truly miss him.


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