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Chapter 32: Back To Basics

"I can't hear you," Jack teased, grinning.

Kelsey sat up in the water and splashed her coach. She smiled back, wondering how it was possible that there was ever a time in her life when she didn't find Jack swoon-inducingly handsome, just drop dead and go to heaven gorgeous.

The August sun beat down, turning his brown hair into strands of metallic gold that formed a curly halo around his head. In spite of his liberal use of sunscreen, his skin was the color of warm toffee, as if he'd been dipped in a pot of the sweet stuff in some heavenly confectioner's kitchen. As usual, he was medical textbook fit, looking like a drawing of musculature, every area tight and defined, his skin pulled taut over all of it as he moved.

His eyes seemed to get lighter in direct proportion to how tan he was, the golden flecks picking up the tones of his skin, his long, pale lashes giving him a perpetual look of wide-eyed astonishment. And he always seemed to smile and soften simultaneously when he looked at Kelsey, flashing the All-American guy smile that felt like it was melting the fillings in her teeth.

"PULL-BREATHE, KICK-GLIDE!" she chanted in his face. "There, was that loud enough? Coach?"

"Doesn't help to say it if you're not doing it at the same time," Jack retorted. "Come on, I'll do it with you."

And he swam along next to her, both of them saying the words, as he made corrections to her technique, reminding her how to position her hands and feet, and even her fingers.

"How in the world does it matter what my fingers are doing?" Kelsey asked.

"Trust me, it matters. In a sport where the presence of a zipper can make or break a race, fingers matter. Lip balm matters."

"It does not!" Kelsey laughed.

"Okay," Jack agreed. "Maybe not lip balm. But everything matters, everything creates drag, so you need to think about anything that the water can push against, and try to remove it."

They did a few more laps before Jack declared himself satisfied, but the truth was he was elated.  She had learned the breaststroke very quickly, and he suspected that she was one of the "natural" breaststrokers they'd discussed.

He had her dive in and do a few breaststroke starts, known as a pull-down, and she remembered it perfectly from the day before.

"Well," he said, boosting himself up on the side of the pool to sit. "I think we've done as much as we can in this little pool."

"Yeah." Kelsey agreed. She boosted herself out too, and Jack admired the fluidity of movement, the natural grace she displayed as she turned in midair to sit next to him. The marks on her body had nearly all faded, and she looked incredible. She pulled her cap off and shook out her hair.

"When we started all this, you got all offended when I said this pool was too small, remember?" Jack reminded her, nudging her shoulder with his.

Kelsey nodded.

"But you're right," she said. "By the time I do a decent dive, I'm half way across the pool, and I can't really practice my break out strokes or turns. And if I do a good pull-down on the breaststroke, I barely have time to do any actual strokes. Imagine if I could do pull-downs like you."

When Jack did pull-downs, he reached the far wall before he even finished them, and no room to begin swimming at all.

Jack smiled with pride at his pupil, who had come so far so fast.

"So," she continued, "what do I do, then?"

"Well, I talked to my coach, and we can use the UCSM pool for the next two weeks," he told her. "We only need one lane, so it's not a big deal," and there's always something going on there, so I think if you wear your caps and goggles and all that, no one will really know it's you." A few months ago he would've made some joke about how her body was so stellar that she might get recognized anyway, but not now, not anymore.

"Oh, wow," Kelsey responded. "That sounds kind of scary."

"Nah, it's a bit of an adjustment, but nothing you can't handle," Jack assured her.

"Jack?"

"Kelsey?"

"Can I ask you a question?"

"I think you just did."

Kelsey made a face. "That joke is so old and so lame, Jack LaGuardia. Really beneath you. But I'll let it go because you're so cute."

"Thank you," he said with a grin. He looked at her expectantly.

"Do you--are you, uh, do you not--" Kelsey stopped, tracing a pattern on her honey-colored thigh with her thumb nail.

Jack waited.

Kelsey took a deep breath.

"Please tell the truth," she said in a quiet voice.

Jack nodded. "Of course," he assured her.

"Do you not--do you not--" Kelsey took another deep breath and looked down at her lap. 

Jack sat next to her, aching to reach for her, to comfort her, not daring to, not wanting to invade her space after working so hard to make sure she had a safe space in which to exist around him. Jack was always scrupulously careful to make sure all physical overtures were made by Kelsey herself, initiated by her.

"Are you not attracted to me anymore?" she finally asked, using her special voice, the quiet voice she reserved for talking about her assault. "Do you not want me anymore?" 

She swallowed and rushed on. "I mean, I wouldn't blame you if you didn't, it was pretty gross, and I smell so awful, all the time, that cologne just turns your stomach, I know, and it's hard not imagine it happening every time you look at--"

"Whoa." Jack put a hand on her shoulder. "Stop. Just--stop."

He pulled her a little bit to face him. "Where did this come from?"

She shrugged. "Like I said a long time ago, I can tell when someone's into me, and you're completely shut down." She took Jack's hand. "Don't get me wrong, you're really kind and comforting and nice and everything, but you're not like you were before, you know?"

Jack sighed, and risked tucking a wet strand of hair behind her cute, perfect ear.

"I've been trying so hard, Kelsey, not to give off any vibes like that. I didn't want to scare you, freak you out, make you feel pressure or anything," he explained. "Everything I've read about situations like this, everything Dr. Butler's told me,  said I'm supposed to back way, way off of all that stuff, keep things on a super-platonic footing."

"Oh," was all Kelsey could think of to say. "Well, that's good to know," she said, looking up to give him a crooked little grin before looking down again. "So you've just been waiting for me to say something, make a move or whatever?"

"Yeah," he said, nodding. "The last thing you said about all this was that you weren't ready to be intimate, right? And you were worried that I was angry or something? Remember?"

Kelsey nodded. "I'm ready," she said to her lap.

"Ready for what?" he asked.

"To be intimate," she said, her voice very soft.

"Wait, what?" Jack asked. He was absolutely sure he'd misunderstood, or at the very least misheard her. It had been barely a month, after all.

"No, you don't mean that," he said, shaking his head. "Kelsey, don't worry about me, okay? I'm totally fine with things the way they are. I'm the guy who was prepared to wait until he got married, remember?" He laughed, encouraging her to join him. "Some rape survivors don't want sexual contact with anyone for years, sometimes for the rest of their lives--"

Kelsey looked up at him.

He nodded at her. "Honestly, I'm good, you don't have to, I mean, we don't have to, not until you're ready, sweetheart--"

"Jack."

Kelsey's voice cut through his dithering, and he stared at her. She was beautiful in the sunlight of the California afternoon. She was already beginning to perspire a little at her temples, little dots of moisture that glistened, that made Jack want to taste them.

"I'm ready. Now." She looked at him, gray eyes serious, eyebrows raised. "Unless you're not?"

Jack stared at her, then slowly shook his head.

Kelsey gave him a puzzled look, so Jack changed his head shake to a nod, which only made her look more puzzled.

"Use your words, Jack, please," she implored, laughing. 

"I'm ready, definitely ready, so ready," he said, smiling. "How's that?"

"Perfect," she said, beaming. She rose and looked down at him. "Shall we?"

He goggled at her. "What, right now?"

"No time like the present, that's what I say," she replied with a sexy laugh.

"Okay, well, whatever you say," he said, jumping up and following her down the path to his house.

Kelsey went straight to the bathroom, leaving Jack sitting on the edge of the bed. She came out, damp hair in a braid, wearing one of his T-shirts, and sat next to him, so their thighs were touching.

"Okay, so, a few ground rules first," Jack said, turning to look at her. He ticked them off on his fingers.

"One, we stop whenever you want, no matter what we're doing.

"Two, if I ask you what you're thinking or feeling, you tell me the truth, and vice versa, at any point.

"Three, if something I'm doing bothers you or triggers you, you tell me immediately.

"Four, we have a safe word," Jack concluded.

Kelsey raised her eyebrows at the last one.

"Jack," she said, putting a hand on his chest. "Our safe word is 'stop,' okay? I mean, come on. Isn't that all I need to say to you, ever?" She looked into his eyes intently, and he nodded.

"Okay, then," she said, taking a deep breath. Let's get the hardest part over with first." 

And she grasped her T-shirt and pulled it off in one smooth motion, leaving herself sitting in just her pink undies.

"Do I look different to you?" she asked. 

Jack lifted her chin so he could look into her eyes. "No," he said, shaking his head. "You look a little thinner, but I already knew that from the swimming. You look absolutely stunning."

"Oh, Jack," Kelsey whispered, lifting her chin even further, fitting her mouth to his. He let his breath out through his nose, relishing the feel of her lips on him, of her arms going around his neck.

He lifted her body onto his so she sat on his lap, facing him. She gasped a little when her thighs made contact with his jammers, which were still a little damp, and therefore cold. He pulled her body closer, so he could feel her warm breasts against his chest. 

She reached around to his back, grasping, digging in with her nails, the pain a sharp counterpoint to the pleasure Jack was feeling between his legs. The blood was quickly leaving his brain, making rational thought difficult, pumping him up, making him so hard, so fast.

"God, gotta get these off," he mumbled, lifting her, standing her up in front of him and raising his hips to lower his jammers.

His length sprang out, hot and hard already. Kelsey stood before him, beautiful in just her little undies, and he reached for her, pulling her in so he could press kisses to her tummy. She climbed back on his lap, straddling him, rubbing him between her legs, as she reached to kiss him again.

She pushed him so he was lying down, and he asked, as she was leaning over him, "Are you okay? Do we need to stop?"

"I'm fine, Jack, don't worry," she said, smiling at him, moving down his body with her mouth, making him buck his hips up toward her mouth. He felt like she was swallowing him, devouring him, the sensations were making his eyes roll back in his head.

Jack was astonished. He'd assumed that the first time they were together after what happened to her, it would be a gentle, emotional experience, of him telling her of her sweetness, of encouragement and comfort more than anything. 

Kelsey, apparently, had other plans.

He didn't even have time to warn her, he just erupted into her mouth, gushing thickly, many spurts, because it had been so long. 

When Jack was finally finished, he felt like he should apologize, but Kelsey was on him before he could, kissing him with her beautiful mouth, the mouth that just finished giving him such pleasure and was so soft and hot and wet still.

He couldn't even kiss her very well because he was so out of breath. He held her and turned them over, wanting to touch her and have more access to her body. He stroked her, from her waist down to her thigh, and her skin was as smooth and supple as it ever had been.

"Kelsey, you're so gorgeous," he murmured. She smiled and wrapped her arms even more tightly around his neck.

"I love you, Jack, I love you," she whispered, nodding. She kissed him again, parting her lips to touch his tongue with her own, reaching into his mouth, moaning as she spread her legs and wrapped them around his hips.

Jack was hard again. He couldn't believe it. He could still feel little residual pulses from his last orgasm in his belly, and he was already probing between her slim thighs, searching for her entrance.

"Yes, Jack, yes," Kelsey encouraged, her voice and breath hot in his ear. 

He pressed into her and felt how wet she was for him, heard the sound of himself pushing into her, and thought he was going to lose his mind from how wonderful it all was. He looked down at her again, beautiful eyes starry, color in her cheeks. 

He took a breath.

"Jack, if you ask if I want to stop I will kill you," she murmured with a smile. "Okay?" She lifted her hips and locked her ankles behind his back.

He laughed, lowering his head to her shoulder for a moment. "Do you want to come, then?" He wiggled his fingers in front of her face. "You want a hand? Or you want to do something after?"

Kelsey just shook her head. "I'm so turned on I think I'm going to come when you do," she replied, laughing back.

"Oh, really?" Jack replied, raising his eyebrows.

Kelsey nodded. "Just go hard, okay?"

"Okay.

Jack drove forward, as far and as hard as he could, trying to make it last, trying to think of icicles, and playing video games with his brothers, anything to distract him from what was happening between his legs and how incredibly, blissfully good it felt. 

Kelsey lifted her hips to meet him at the apex of each thrust, rolling her hips and tightening her legs on him, looking intently into his eyes.

Eventually the rhythm became loud and huge, their breaths matched, and Jack felt like he could hear her pulse in his head as their eyes locked.

"Oh god, Jack, I'm going to come, I'm--I'm--ah--ahh--" she hugged herself tightly to his body, arching her ribcage into him, squeezing the breath out of him. Jack felt her become impossibly taut, all of her, like she was being electrocuted.

She started to relax, then tensed up again, grasping at him, biting his neck. This happened two more times before she finally became completely slack, lying back on the pillow, looking so beautiful that Jack felt like he would cry from just looking at her.

She rewrapped her legs around his hips, encouraging him, "Come on, Jack, come on now, I want to feel you inside me," until he couldn't take it anymore, and he came again, feeling like someone was scrambling his brain.

He fell down on top of her, worried that he was going to crush her, but unable to move.

"I love when you just fall down on me, Jack," Kelsey said in his ear. "I love the way this feels, when I'm just crushed by you."

He finally was able to roll off her, slipping out of her body, the space between them on the bed soaked. 

"Kels?"

"Yeah?" She stroked his face.

"When you tense up and relax like that, like you do, are you having an orgasm every time?"

She smiled and nodded.

"So does that mean that you came, um, four times just now?" He couldn't help smiling as he asked.

She nodded again. "Does that make you happy, Jack?" 

He raised an eyebrow and put his hands behind his head as he surveyed the ceiling. "Maybe," he admitted.

He suddenly turned to her, concerned.

"We didn't do any of the rules," he said. "I mean, I kind of asked, but--"

"It's because we didn't need to," she assured him.

"But all the stuff I read--" he began.

"Applies to some people, I'm sure," Kelsey said. "But not to me.

"Jack," she said, sitting up on one elbow. "I'm so happy right now. You have to believe me." She leaned in to look at him. "Please, please, tell me you are too?"

Jack put his hand on the back of her head. "I am so happy," he said. "I am. I am."




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