I avoided Aiden for the next few weeks.

I tried not to be in the room when he was, which was proving to be a little difficult, especially because the soccer season was over and the water polo season wasn't until spring. So he was usually in our room, either studying or strumming at his guitar.

He was amazing with the guitar. Whenever he played, his face grew serious. The cocky expression he usually wore on his face disappeared and instead, it was replaced by an intensity that vibrated off of him. Sometimes, he would close his eyes, not looking at the guitar, and play the most beautiful music I'd ever heard. Somehow, whenever I was in the room and he was playing his guitar, the music soothed me. The soft notes he played, the smooth melodies, the quiet acoustic songs; they were comforting. It was as if they had their own language and they were speaking directly to me. I could feel the notes telling me that things would be all right. I could hear them telling me to be strong, to not give up, to not be afraid.

I guess that's why I didn't like being in the room when he was. Whenever he played his music, the comfort of it, it scared me. I didn't want to feel comforted. I didn't want to be relaxed. I didn't deserve it. I hated myself for who I was and how my life was. And when his music told me it would be all right, I wanted to tell it that I didn't want it to be all right. I needed to suffer. It was my fault. I deserved it.

There was another reason I avoided my room.

I still hadn't apologized to Aiden for being such an incredible jerk when I had snapped at him. He was only concerned and I shouldn't have yelled at him. But I was afraid of letting him in. Ben was already getting dangerously close. Every time I was near him, I could feel myself becoming vulnerable. I always seemed to be running away from him. But I couldn't let him see me. He would be so disappointed. I had become so weak.

                                                        ~~~~~~~~~~

At the moment, I was sitting in my room. Classes had let out about an hour ago and Aiden was currently not in the room. I was sitting on my bed in my warm sweats, my French book propped open in front of me. Finals week was approaching soon and the teachers were on crack-down. I had an enormous pile of work to do and then I also had a good amount to study.

I heard my door open and looked up to see Aiden walked in. I felt my stomach sink as our eyes connected momentarily. Then we both looked away. We had built up a mutual silence amongst ourselves. He knew not to talk to me and I would never dare to speak to him.

But every time I saw his face, I'd feel a pang of guilt. I knew I had hurt him when I yelled at him for asking me what was wrong. But I had been so sick of people asking me that. I just wanted them all to stop.

He had changed quite a bit in the past few weeks, as well. He was more serious now than he was when I first met him. When I saw him sitting with his friends, he was no longer the person cracking the jokes and making everyone else laugh. Instead, he just sat at the table, his head down. He would often receive phone calls at night which he never answered. It seemed like ever since these phone calls started to arrive, his personality had changed. I wondered half-heartedly what it was and who it was that was calling him. But I would never dare ask him. Because that would mean having to confess my own past. And I couldn't do that.

Aiden went into the bathroom to change out of his uniform. In the meantime, I heard another knock at the door. I sighed and climbed off the bed to open the door. When I pulled it open, I came face to face with a pretty girl that had long, blonde hair and blue-grey eyes. She raised an eyebrow when she saw me.

"Who the hell are you?" she asked. I frowned and bit my lip.

I had seen this girl around before. Her name was Madison Korrs. She was the head cheerleader for the varsity squad, had high fashion, was friends with everyone, and was currently dating Aiden. Everyone wanted to be her. Everyone worshipped. I, for one, had no idea what the hype was all about.

"I'm Renee," I replied in my quiet voice. She furrowed her brow at me.

"What are you doing in Aiden's room?" she asked. Now I raised my eyebrows at her.

"I'm his roommate..." I said slowly. I watched as she turned visibly angry and perplexed.

"What?! He's rooming with a girl! He never told me that!" she exclaimed angrily. Just then, Aiden walked out of the bathroom in a pair of black sweatpants and a white hoodie. He froze when he saw Madison and me standing at the door.

"Shit..." I heard him mutter under his breath. He came up next to me at the door.

"Look, before you start frea-" he started.

"You're rooming with a girl?! You told me you had a new roommate but you failed to mention she was A GIRL?!" she shouted at him.

"See, that's what I would call freaking out," he said. She glared at him, her blue-grey eyes stormy.

"Why didn't you tell me your roommate was a girl?" she asked in a low voice.

"You never asked!" he replied.

"YOU STILL SHOULD HAVE TOLD ME!" she yelled.

I stood in the midst of this argument, not knowing if I should retreat back into the room or walk out of it. The second option was a bit limited, seeing as Madison had the door blocked. She was wearing a pair of black leather boots with heels and I was afraid that if I tried to sneak out, she would kick me with them.

"It's not a big deal! I don't know why you're freaking out so much!" Aiden cried.

"Ummm...BECAUSE SHE'S A GIRL!" she said, throwing her hands up and then letting them fall to her sides. I bit my lip nervously.

"She's just my roommate..." Aiden said, his voice sounding wary all of a sudden.

"I bet she's been trying to steal you away from me. I bet she's the reason you've been acting so weird and depressed lately, isn't it? She's trying to take you away from me!" she exclaimed. I raised my eyebrows at her absurd deduction.

"She's not. That's not why I've been acting differently. I hardly ever see her," he explained, his calm voice in sharp contrast with Madison's angry one.

"Oh yeah right! You two sleep in the same room! What the hell! I thought co-ed rooms weren't allowed?" she said.

"They're not. She had no choice. All the girls' rooms are at capacity," he said, running his hand over his face. He looked tired and stressed and Madison didn't seem  to be helping.

"And so they just had to stick her in here with you? There wasn't some loser-nerd that could have roomed with her?" she asked, clearly exasperated.

"No. Christopher switched schools, remember? I'm the only senior that doesn't have a roommate," he said. She glared at him and then at me.

"You better watch it. If I even see you looking at him for too long, I will destroy you," she hissed at me.

"Madison..." Aiden groaned, glaring at her.

"And you better watch yourself, too," she said to him. With a flip of her hair, she turned around and walked to the elevators. Aiden let out a long sigh and then closed the door. I stayed standing where I was, facing the now closed door. He leaned against it and I felt him looking at me.

"Sorry about that," he said, his voice gruff.

"It's not your fault," I answered, looking down at my feet and avoiding his gaze. These were the first words we had spoken to each other in a long while.

"She just gets jealous easily," he told me. I shook my head.

"You don't have to explain it to me. It's all right," I said.  I felt his gaze linger on my face before he nodded and pushed off from the door. I wanted to let the conversation drop here, but for some reason, my mouth decided it wasn't time to stop talking just yet.

"I'm sorry, too," I blurted out. He turned around and looked at me. I was looking up at him now, our eyes linked in an intense gaze.

"For what?" he asked.

"For being the way I am," I replied, my voice quiet and wavering. His jaw clenched slightly and his eyes hardened.

"Look, sometimes things suck. I know that better than anyone else. But you can't let it get to you," he said. He had no idea how many times I had heard those same words from so many others.

"You have no idea," I whispered.

"I do, Renee. I've been through more shit than anyone I've ever met and no one knows a thing. But I won't let it get to me. I'm not going to let it stop me from living my life," he said.

"And what if whatever happened to you won't leave you alone? What if you can't let it go? What if it haunts you like your own shadow? What if it's apart of you? Then what? Then how do you live your life, Aiden?" I asked him, my own eyes hardening.

"You learn to cope," he said.

"That's easier said than done," I told him.

"Isn't everything?" he asked. "But what makes a person strong is their willingness to move on," he said.

"Then I'd rather be weak. Because I can't move on," I said.

We continued to look at each other, our gaze unwavering. In just these past few moments, I had told him more about me than I had told anyone else without telling him what had really happened. But at the same time, he had just told me about himself, too. We had inadvertantly revealed our true faces to each other.

I realized how close I was getting to letting him in and so I turned and walked out the door. I couldn't tell him. He couldn't know. And I knew if I had continued to stand there that something would have happened and it wouldn't have been good for either of us. Sometimes things were better left unsaid. Sometimes, things were better left unknown. Because once they were, you could never forget them.

______________________________________________________________________________

A/N: Short chapter, I know. I just wanted to introduce Madison into this. She'll be a bit of an issue.

What do you think about Renee and Aiden's situation? What do you think Aiden is hiding? Do you think they'll tell each other?

Leave me a comment! And VOTE PLEASE!!!

XOXO