Good person?
When Jungkook transferred to Atlanta's high school, he spent the first few days clinging to Sage's side- allowing the girl to introduce him to the school and get accustomed to the different environment. He didn't even notice when Katelyn began to slip between him and Sage with small smiles and short conversations, until he blinked and realised that he hadn't spoken to Sage in two months. But when Jungkook tried to speak to the girl, it seemed like the smile on her face was forced and the look in her eyes was guarded- allowing Katelyn to slip between them yet again and guide Jungkook away from her. But what Jungkook never understood was why Katelyn was so adamant on wanting Jungkook to stay by her side. Maybe that's exactly why the female chose to mutter the next sentence,
"You've always wondered why I hang out with you so much or why I kept you around. I think it's time I finally tell you."
Jungkook's eyes fluttered up and he swallowed down the lump in his throat before giving her a small nod. His attention was finally captured by having Katelyn dangle, something he desired to know, in front of his face. Truth is, Jungkook did always wonder why Katelyn seemed to almost be scared of letting him out of her sight. She always kept a close eye on him and never mistreated him with snarky comments and sarcastic jokes, unlike the others around her. Jungkook used to ask Katelyn why she befriended him, while pushing everyone else away, but the girl only shrugged off his question and changed the topic, which left Jungkook confused and curious.
The blonde girl huffed out a small chuckle and hooked her fingers around the edge of the chair before dragging it closer to Jungkook, allowing a screeching sound to fill the silent cabin. The bunny boy winced at the noise, but didn't have to say anything else, since his body spoke for him. His shoulder's straightened out and fingers tightened around the armrests, his jaw locked in place and eyes narrowed as they followed Katelyn- watching the girl slowly slide into the seat.
Their gazes locked for a few seconds before Katelyn offered him a small smile and parted her lips to mutter, "I'll admit, that in the beginning, the reason why I kept you around was because I wanted to spite Sage. The first time we met, the first thing she did was try to protect you, which made me believe that she may have a crush on you." Jungkook's brows shot up to his hairline and lips parted to reveal the tips of his bunny teeth- shocked and flustered by the sudden revelation. But Jungkook didn't get to say anything because Katelyn began to speak again, "I enjoyed the feeling of power and control as I slowly took you away from Sage and got to watch her deflate. I know what I did was wrong now, but I didn't care back then. All I cared was that for once, someone chose me over her." Katelyn breathed out, sinking into the chair and placing her elbow on the armrest before nudging her thumb against her lip.
Katelyn cleared her throat and sucked in her cheeks, "The more I got to know you, the clearer it was to me that you were different from the people at school. You were...the epitome of who I used to be and everything I lost. Being with you, made me realise how much I've changed and how horrible I've become." Katelyn stated confidently, peering up at Jungkook from behind her thick lashes and strands of blond hair. The bunny boy stared back at her with sealed lips and wide eyes- his ears perked up and eyes shimmering with curiosity, "You were someone I...admired." Katelyn whispered through a soft smile without looking away from Jungkook.
"Wha..what?" Jungkook stuttered- heart pounding in his ears and blood rushing to his cheeks. He couldn't believe that Katelyn used to admire him, especially the person he used to be. Jungkook believed that the person he was, was a weak, cowardly, pathetic thing, and he was happy that he changed for the better, "Ho..how? What? Why?" He suddenly sat up straighter, blinking back at her with doe eyes full of interest and confusion.
Katelyn grinned back at him, allowing her eyes to crinkle at the corners and two spots, on her chin, to sink in and reveal two small dimples, "How could someone not admire you and wish to be like you? God, Kook, you used to be so kind and generous, never doubting anyone or questioning anything. You trusted everyone so easily.....and that's why I kept you by my side. I didn't want you to lose the innocence and obliviousness towards the world and the true nature of the people, like I did. I wanted you to remain kind and curios, trusting and innocent. And...I...I hoped that if I spent more time with you, the more you would rub off on me. But in reality...." The smile on Katelyn's face crumbled in a second and eyes fell down to her shoes. She bit her lip and released a small huff, "But in reality, the more time you spent with me, the more you turned into me."
Jungkook's throat dried out and head felt a bit light headed after having the truth be poured all over his head, "But...but I-" He stuttered, only to be cut off by Katelyn standing up from her seat, causing the chair to be pushed back and nearly topple over. Katelyn was quick to grab it and steady it with an awkward smile before clearing her throat and placing her hands on her hips.
"Listen, Kook, most of the teenagers our age had lost their innocent view of the world a long time ago. Adults didn't know, they thought that we were dumb, little kids....but even dumb, little kids had feelings. So let me tell you something..." Katelyn hissed, allowing her lip to wobble and eyes to prickle with unshed tears as she placed her hands on top of Jungkook's forearms and leaned down to face him better. Jungkook swallowed thickly and flinched back, yet didn't dare to look away from Katelyn's teary eyes as the girl lowered her voice and breathed out, "It hurt so much when our innocence was ripped away from us and we were forced to grow up too quickly." A bitter chuckle rumbled in Katelyn's throat, causing the hairs on Jungkook's neck to stand up and his tongue to dart out from his mouth to moisten his lips, "And when we became cold, heartless, and selfish, they blamed it all on us and even dared to act confused- never taking accountability for being the reason behind our drastic change."
A tear slipped out of Katelyn's eye and rushed down her cheek before reaching her chin and dripping down on Jungkook's hoodie. The girl was quick to stand up and spin around on her heel, she pressed her sleeve against her cheek and wiped away any remains of the tear as she slid back to her chair and carefully climbed into it.
The tongue in Jungkook's mouth was heavier than usual, weighting him down and making it almost impossible for him to utter a single word. His coffee eyes followed after Katelyn and teeth nipped at the corners of his lips before he allowed his head to fall forward and gaze to settle on the ropes tied around his hands.
Katelyn's words shot something through him- a flash of realisation perhaps, or maybe it was compassion. The feeling of hatred and disgust seemed to diminish in him as he realised that a similar thing had happened to him, and for a split second, Jungkook wished that he had never left the prison because that way he still had his innocence left.
Was he really like Katelyn?
Brief flashes of all the people he killed, rushed through his mind, only for Jungkook to squeeze his eyes shut and shake his head softly. The images and memories got squished into a large chest and hidden behind a lock before being pushed down to the darkest corners of Jungkook's mind. No, Jungkook fluttered his eyes open and inhaled a stuttering breath, blinking away the tears in the corners of his eyes, I am better, I would never hurt anyo- didn't I already? Jungkook suppressed a gasp by inhaling a sharp breath and sitting up straighter in his seat.
"I'm better." A quiet whisper brushed past his lips- breathy and barely audible. But instead of doing what it's supposed to do- reassure Jungkook that he was a good person- it did the complete opposite and rose even more doubt inside of him.
Was he a good person?
"Jeongguk?"
Fearful eyes shot up and connected with Katelyn's confused ones. The latter stared back at him with concern before tilting her head to the side and leaning forward in her seat. Jungkook sucked in a sharp breath and flinched as Katelyn reached out her hand and pressed the tips of her fingers against his cheek and wiped away a stray tear on his cheekbone.
"What happened, bun?"
The quiet murmur and concerned gaze, aided by the familiar nickname his mother gave him, was enough for Jungkook's cold demeanour to crack and nearly crash to the ground. Jungkook's chest rose and fell as frantic pants rushed past his lips, his eyes had grown wide and prickled with unshed tears, only to be squeezed shut tightly.
"Go away." Jungkook breathed out, hating how easily Katelyn slid past his walls with her manipulation. He wanted her to leave him alone and not destroy the perfect little illusion he had built around his mind, which made all the murders, he had committed, appear more like a hazy nightmare, rather than something he had done in reality, "Go away." He repeated, turning his head to the side and trying to press his nose into his hoodie, only for his cheeks to be grabbed and head to be cradled between two small palms.
"Kook." Katelyn breathed out, looming over Jungkook and keeping her hands settled on Jungkook's cheeks and thumbs sliding underneath his shut eyes, "Look at me, Kookie." She murmured softly, brushing his dark locks away from his face to reveal his sweaty forehead and furrowed brows, "I know you don't trust me, you don't have to trust me. But believe me when I say that I...I care about you more than I care about anyone else."
A trembling lower lip got captured between bunny teeth and a small nose scrunched up before Jungkook's eyes finally fluttered open to reveal pain-filled coffee coloured eyes. Pants fell out of Jungkook's mouth and he frequently swallowed down the lump in his throat to try and stop himself from sinking into the pain.
"Why?" Jungkook croaked, shutting his eyes for a second to push back his tears before opening them again to look up into Katelyn's equally wet eyes, "Why me? Why me?" He hissed, yet there wasn't any hostility, only desperation for answers.
"You showed be how horrible I am with your...your little judgmental stares and pouts." Katelyn chuckled, sniffling slightly and running her thumbs along Jungkook's cheekbones, "You made me miss the person I used to be and made me want to become better. God, you have no idea how good you were, how much you influenced me to be better, despite all the negativity I created around me. I never told you..." Another quiet chuckle left Katelyn's lips and she lifted her hand away from Jungkook's cheek to brush away a stray tear from her face, "But one time I went to talk to Sage and apologise for everything I did to her to try and make up...but I was scared of being seen as weak in front of her, which made me chicken out and leave before I could say anything to her."
"You did?" Jungkook whispered with furrowed brows, blinking up at Katelyn with shock- watching as the girl nodded with a small smile and slowly straightened out, allowing her hand to slip away from Jungkook's face.
Katelyn raised her hands and pressed her sleeves against her eyes before sniffling and allowing them to drop back down to her sides, "Fuck, I haven't cried in a while. Look at you, you little asshole, you come marching back in my life and I'm all soft again." Katelyn's rolled her eyes with a fake smile before pulling her sleeves over her hands and crouching down in front of Jungkook.
"Kat...Katelyn?"
"Hmm?"
"Am I a good person?" Jungkook asked shakily- fear and silent plead dripping from his voice. He stared down at Katelyn with hopeful eyes, only for the hope to be shattered as Katelyn's smile slipped away before she answered his question,
"You used to be."
Jungkook felt like someone slammed a hand into his chest and wrapped their hand around his heart before squeezing it until it no longer flowed with blood, "Wha..what?" His tongue felt heavy and limbs numb, he didn't even notice as the stutter stumbled out of his mouth until Katelyn turned her head to the side and rose a brow.
"I care about you, Kook, but I'm not gonna be one of those people that lie to you and say that you're a good person." Katelyn stayed firmly and almost harshly, causing Jungkook's lips to smack together and face to scrunch up into a grimace, "The people you killed in that forest, were good people. They had families, friends, and loved ones that waited for them to come back home. You didn't see the look of grief and devastation on their faces as I walked up to them and told them that I had found the bodies of the people they cared about."
"Shut up." Jungkook's face hardened and grew colder, yet tears still filled his eyes and his lower lip trembled, "You're lying." He shook his head in denial, jerking his hands back to try and slip them past the tight rope, only to fail.
Katelyn scoffed in disbelief and pushed off of the ground to stand over him, "You really think that I need to lie about someone missing the people you murdered?"
"I never mur..murdered anyone!" Jungkook cried out, pressing himself into the chair. His hair fell into his face and hid the small tears rolling down his cheeks, "The people around me are murderers, I'm not like them. I'm innocent, like you said!" Jungkook cried out, nodding his head up at down to try and convince himself, all while pushing away the resurfacing memories of what he had done.
The expression on Katelyn's face washed away in a mere second and was replaced by disbelief, "You're in so much denial." He whispered before raising her shaky hands and gently taking a hold of Jungkook's face, "I can still hear the gut-wrenching cries of Amber's mother or the grief-filled screams of Rhys' teenage son as they found out that they're never gonna see them again." Katelyn whispered, pulling Jungkook's head up so that he'd look into her cold eyes, "Did you even know their names before you killed them? Before you took them away from their loved ones and never allowed them to hear their voices again? Did you allow them to see their mothers or children one last time before you kill-"
"Stop!" A loud sob followed after the sharp whimper, before Jungkook's cold demeanour was shattered into millions of tiny pieces and sprinkled across the floor of the cabin. Heavy tears fell out of his eyes and streamed down his face, and choked sobs and whimpers mixed together with harsh breaths as they stumbled out of his mouth, "I'm..I'm not...bad!" Jungkook cried out, lifting his head and connecting his red, teary eyes with Katelyn's soft ones.
The blond girl inhaled a deep breath and shut her eyes for a second before gulping down a ball of saliva and hardening her demeanour, "Yes, you are. You're not a good person, Jungkook, you're not. Stop lying to yourself, stop denying that you killed all those people, because you did." Katelyn hissed harshly, her fingers tightening around Jungkook's slim cheeks, making his eyes tear up and nose scrunch up as he sniffles, before he released another sob and shook his head, "Yes, yes, Jeongguk. You were the one who ruthlessly killed all those people without an ounce of guilt. Good people don't do that, a good person would never hunt down an innocent person and kill them in cold blood. You're not a good person, Jeongguk, say it with me."
Jungkook shook his head before pulling it back, causing Katelyn's hands to slip off of his wet cheeks and fall to her sides, "I'm a good person, I...I know I am." He whispered, sniffling softly and shutting his eyes to stop his tears from coming.
Katelyn quickly pounced forward and placed her hands on the back of his chair, "Why are you a good person, Jeongguk? Hmm? Give me a reason and I'll leave you alone." She whispered, leaning down.
Jungkook's eyes flew open, only to be greeted by Katelyn's face glaring into his own. Jungkook flinched back and parted his lips to respond, only for the words to die out on the tip of his tongue when he realised that his mind was empty. Not a single thing or memory resurfaced that helped him prove that he was indeed a good person. And the more he tried to remember, the more the bad memories began to resurface and wrapped around his throat like a noose. Maybe that's why Jungkook had such a hard time convincing himself that he was a good person, maybe that's why his perfectly set up illusion was so quick to crumble under the smallest weight.
Jungkook's eyes slowly trailed away from Katelyn's moving lips and to her eyes before slipping past her to focus on the ceiling over her head. It had small cracks in it with dust stuck between them. Jungkook could see a spiderweb running from the lamp, hang over his head, and towards the corner of the room. The light from the cracked window fell onto the spider web and made it glisten as if it was covered in small diamonds.
Jungkook's limbs felt numb and body felt like it was floating, he couldn't hear anything, except a ringing noise in his ears. His head felt lightheaded and chest hurt, causing his face to scrunch up in pain, yet he wasn't able to look away from the spiderweb as a small spider peeked out from the lamp and rushed across the spiderweb.
The realisation that he was a bad person slammed into Jungkook and knocked him out of his body. Jungkook felt like his mother was standing over him and staring down at him with disappointment and disgust for the person he had become. He imagined Marley standing next to her and cowering behind her in fear as they watched him slaughter those innocent people ruthlessly and without any remorse. He imagined his mother picking up Marley and setting her on her hip before sending him a one last look of disappointment before turning around and leaving him- not being able to look at him without feeling disgusted by him.
A loud crash grabbed Jungkook by his wrist and ripped him back into his body, earning a sharp breath from Jungkook and a few sluggish blinks. Jungkook's head fell forward and eyes landed on his ripped jeans. Tears slipped out of his eyes and followed along the path of wetness until they reached his chin and dripped onto his hoodie. His expression was filled with pain and shock before his eyes squeezed shut and another sob bubbled up in his throat.
Jungkook didn't even notice that Katelyn had left to take care of a few walkers, that stumbled upon the cabin and heard Kook's cries. He didn't notice that Katelyn didn't fully shut the door, allowing it to slam against the frame before creaking back open. Jungkook didn't notice the shuffling of the feet or the growls as a walker stumbled through the door and dragged its feet over to the crying boy. He didn't notice until the walker tripped over its feet and slammed into the ground with a thud.
Sharp sobs turned into soft sniffles and quiet whimpers before coffee eyes blinked open and turned to gaze down at the walker on the floor. Suddenly everything else seemed to be unimportant as Jungkook stared into the walker's rotten mouth and yellowish eyes. Jungkook's breathing became laboured and body rigged as he struggled against the ropes and tried to break free, all while staring at the walker crawling towards him.
"Stop, stop, stop, oh my god, oh my god." Jungkook cried out in pure terror, trying to rip his hands out from the rope, only for it to dig into his skin and tear it open. Blood poured out of the wounds and soaked into the ropes before dripping onto the ground.
The walker's growls increased and it seemed to be a bit more frantic at the fresh scent of blood. Jungkook cried out as it's dirty fingers wrapped around his jeans and tugged at his leg, "Katelyn!" Jungkook screamed loudly, trashing against the ropes and trying to pull his leg away as the walker parted it's mouth and leaned down to take a bite out of Jungkook's thigh.
A whoosh filled the air, followed by a thud. Jungkook's eyes fluttered open with a small whimper, only to focus on the tall figure standing in the doorway. Before Jungkook could say or do anything, Taehyung quickly rushed towards him and immediately grabbed grab a hold of his thigh-the place where the walker was about to rip out a chunk.
"Were you bit?" Taehyung's deep baritone voice filled Jungkook's ears and made his heartbeat steady into small beats. His tears stopped coming and lips parted to release a shaky breath, his eyes didn't leave Taehyung's face as the older turned his head and looked up at him with concern, "Jungkook? Have you been bit?" Taehyung snapped his fingers in front of Jungkook's face, pushing him out of his small daze.
"No..no." Jungkook croaked quietly, not looking away from Taehyung's face as the male offered him a small smile before bending down and ripping his knife out of the walker's skull.
Taehyung flipped the knife around and pressed it against the ropes before cutting through them effortlessly. He spared a small glance towards the blood around Jungkook's wrists before looking up at his tear covered face, "Don't cry, bun, we're here now." Taehyung sent him a wink and stood up, but not before nudging the underside of Jungkook's chin with the tip of his finger.
Jungkook smacked his lips together and swallowed down his saliva as Taehyung stood up and leaned in to grab the ropes around his chest. Jungkook's eyes didn't stray from Taehyung's face- even rushing over the mole on the tip of his nose and the zeroing in on the glint of concern in his eyes. Jungkook's tongue darted out of his mouth and slid over his bottom lip as he analysed Taehyung's face. Jungkook ignored how Taehyung's fingers slid between his chest and the rope or how the restricting feeling was gone since Taehyung cut the rope away.
Jungkook's eyes flickered down to Taehyung's lips and blood rushed to his cheeks as he observed the rose coloured lips and the small mole on the corner of Taehyung's mouth. Jungkook rolled his lips together and swallowed another mouthful of saliva- allowing his mind to travel to an fantasy of leaning in and pressing their lips together in a chaste kiss.
Taehyung suddenly looked back up at him, causing their faces to be inches apart and breaths to mingle together. Jungkook's eyes widened and lips parted to show off the tips of his bunny teeth and his pink tongue. Blood rushed up Jungkook's neck and to his cheeks, and his nose twitched as he sniffled without looking away from Taehyung. The small smile on Taehyung's face faltered and throat bobbed as he swallowed before running his eyes over Jungkook's features in a fleeting glance.
"Let's go." Taehyung breathed out, clearing his throat and standing up. He shoved his knife into it's place and didn't look away from his harness as he acted like he was fixing it, when in reality, he just wanted to avoid looking at Jungkook after the thoughts that rushed through his head a mere second ago, "Uhm...Daryl and I baited the walkers here to distract Katelyn and get you away without trouble. Gotta admit, I wanted to kill her, but Daryl suggested this approach in order t-"
Taehyung didn't get to finish what he said because as soon as Jungkook scampered out of the chair, he threw his hands around Taehyung's neck and buried his face into the crook of his neck. Taehyung's eyes grew wide and body straightened out as the warmth of Jungkook's body wrapped around him as a warm blanket. He inhaled a lungful of Jungkook's musky scent with a hint of lavender shampoo mixed with it. Jungkook's brown curls tickled his neck and chin, making him flinch and inhale a stuttering breath, and Koo's fingers grabbed a hold of the back of his shirt.
Taehyung's hands hovered over Jungkook's back before finally settling in the middle of it. The grip around his neck tightened and the tip of Jungkook's nose brushed against his throat, causing Taehyung to release a shaky breath and press his hand firmer against Jungkook's back to pull him against his chest. Jungkook inhaled the scent of citrus on Taehyung's throat and allowed himself to sag against the older- trusting that he'll keep him upright. His eyes fluttered shut and the edge of mouth lifted as he brushed his wet cheeks against Taehyung's shirt- wiping away the salty tears.
The pair stayed wrapped in each other's warmth for a few more seconds- Jungkook enjoying the comfort and stability Taehyung's presence provided him, while Taehyung revelled in the physical touch of another person. Both didn't realise how much they craved for something so simple as a hug, until it was offered to them on a silver platter.
And as they basked in each other's presence and comfort, everything around them seemed to fade and blur into a pile of nothingness, and all that mattered, was each other.
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