Waves of an ocean

An ocean unknown

Feeling for them

It fully flows

Float, hope

Try, die

Curl into myself

Try and escape hell

I am uncertain

I leave the curtain

No one can see

Even I am not me

I'll hold close

I feel most

Yet all is gone

Not what I thought

I wake up soon

I barely knew

I could push around

I could force down

I wait

I anticipate

The stress of then

The feeling bends

I pour out

I can now

Yet no longer

I feel "stronger"

I keep away

I never say

I long to change

But won't pay

--------------------------------------------------------------

Lowkey I don't really do as many author's notes when I post, which is also less. I simply haven't been getting on recently tbh. There isn't really a reason, I just want to do other things with my free time recently.

But also, I have noticed a trend in myself in the past few years, I normally get more depressed/unhappy around January. It hasn't been as much this year thankfully. I have actually been having pretty good circumstances recently and have been feeling generally more happy the past few months.

My theory is that I have at least some symptoms of Seasonal Affective Disorder. I am not saying I have it, or trying to self diagnose. I have a hypothesis that is affects me, because it affects one of my parents.

ALSO, Y'ALL, I HAVE ALLLLMOST 300 READS ON THIS AND I'M VERY A LOT DYING.

Anyways, that is the end of my loooong boi note, have a great morning tomorrow! <3