. Lance.pov.
Let's stop this. I can't do it anymore, it's too hard. Everything is flooding into me. My parents words, my friends judgment, the past. that's too hard. I can't do it anymore.
I miss everything. I can't miss the old days, I can't remember a time I wasn't fucked mentality. I can't do this. Help me. Please. Help me.
I remember the words said to me once. "We can't do it anymore". my own family, done with me. I just need help. can't anyone see? it's all too bright in here.
It's hard you know? keeping up with everyone, knowing how to act in front of them.
I drive everyone away eventually. I hurt everyone. I never apologize to the people who I should. I place blame on everyone but myself. I've always been like this. I never think. I never try. I can't do it. It's too much.
My arms burn, my skins dry, it's hot, it's cold. why can't I make up my mind. shouldn't I stop this? I'm no good of a person. What harm would it do to simply take myself out.
Maybe one person would be sad for a day or maybe even a week. Past that?  no one would bat an eye at my name. maybe they'd even realize it's better without me in the mix. I'd like that.
too selfish. can't do it anymore. I'm not really sorry if I'm honest. it was always gonna end up like this. if I die or if I'm just taken to the hospital, it was always gonna be like this. I'll be sucked up into some fantasy where people cared for me. Where I could be happy, not numb. I think I'd like that. Even if it's fake. just a nice change, don't you think?
The blood running down my fingertips makes dots on the floor, fuck sorry for whoever needs to clean that up. My arms burn, but I can seem to focus on that. I feel dizzy? my stomach hurts, I wonder why that is. Anyways to whoever finds this letter.
Let's stop this.