Lyra had been burdened by blazing guilt since she was eleven years old. Ever since the time she had cast Sirius out of her family, just for being a Gryffindor. She had accepted him back with open arms later, of course, being the only one to do so. Yet, she hadn't stopped thinking about it for twenty-four years. 

The next thing was one she hadn't yet atoned for, though it did end up working out for the better. The way she sped along the reveal that her older sister was in love with a muggleborn, making her run away, making them not see each other for five more years. Now she hadn't seen her in almost eighteen years, half her life. She may be in contact with her niece, but Andromeda's face haunted her daily. 

She would never forget the face of Sturgis Podmore as she watched him be tortured, especially as he was hanging around Twelve Grimmauld Place all the time. The way she had tortured her own professor herself, leading him to his death. She had betrayed every part of her that wanted to be good, betrayed Dumbledore and the fight for justice. And for what? For a cousin that was now dead and an old friend now in Azkaban anyway. 

She didn't even want to get started on the pain she had caused James Potter. The pain that had led him and Lily Evans to their deaths, that landed Sirius in Azkaban and made Remus live in solitude for over a decade. 

But at the ripe age of thirty-five (not yet thirty-six, even though her birthday was coming up), Lyra wasn't sure what she why guilty. There were all the things from her past, of course. But there was new guilt and she couldn't tell where it was coming from. 

She felt it when she looked at the Order of the Phoenix, like she was betraying them by being part of the family she was. That she was married to a known Death Eater, with a son that could very well be following that path if she didn't do her best to make sure he didn't.

But then she looked at her husband, no matter how much she loathed him. She knew he would be killed if the Death Eaters found out what she had been doing. Draco, as well. Draco would also be heartbroken that she had spent so much time lying to him, spending all this time with his arch-enemy (he truly had the Black flair for dramatics).

Lyra missed being young, honestly. Before everything had gone to hell and she was just carefree, not knowing anything about the world around her.  Sometimes she thought she might be happy again, that things would go back to the way they were. 

But the more she knew, the less faith she had. And as a member of the Order and the wife of a Death Eater, Lyra knew a lot, unfortunately. 

But that wasn't enough for some members of the Order. They wanted more than Snape could give them as spy. They wanted another one, and there was one they could hide in plain sight. 

"No way," Sirius disagreed during one of their meetings at Twelve Grimmauld Place. 

"Seconded." Remus nodded, agreeing with his old friend. 

"It's a good plan, Sirius, Remus," Hestia Jones retorted with, though casting a distrusting glance Lyra's way.  "One of the only ones we have to get more information about the Death Eaters. Even though I don't trust her."

Tonks rolled her eyes, getting sick and tired of the way she'd been talking about her aunt ever since she joined the Order.  "We've gotten that by now, thanks, Hestia."

"Enough," Moody finally spoke up, his voice commandeering and strong as usual. Everyone quickly quieted down. "Malfoy, you should do it. Finally, you might be able to give us some useful information."

Lyra crossed her arms and leaned back in her chair, exchanging annoyed looks with Sirius. "I've given you plenty of useful information without becoming a Death Eater, Moody."

"Like what?"

The blonde woman raised her eyebrows, daring the older wizard to challenge her. She didn't like feeling like she wasn't contributing to their cause, and especially not when Hestia Jones (or anyone supporting her) did it. "Like the fact that there's a meeting going on tonight."

"That doesn't really mean much when we don't know where, who or at what time," Moody responded. "I know you don't want the Dark Mark, but we all know we'll get much more information if you do. It won't get you killed if you'll just be like Snape."

She scrunched her nose up in disgust, not loving the idea of being compared to the likes of Severus Snape. "You've already got a Snape."

"Merlin knows we don't need another one of him in the world," Sirius whispered to Remus, not enjoying the idea any more than his cousin did. "Think I'd fall dead on the spot."

"At least then you'd learn how to shut up," Remus joked back, snickering to himself, not caring that Sirius then went on to punch him in the shoulder. 

"Anyway," Lyra interrupted their joking, mostly because she didn't want to start laughing in the middle of an important meeting. "It would be suspicious if I tried to get the Mark now. I've spent years telling my husband how much I didn't want it. That, along with the fact that I've been disappearing so much nowadays, will only make everyone suffer."

"Fine. We'll talk about this later. It's getting late, I have things to do," said Moody begrudgingly, showing that he wasn't very happy about the results of the conversation. "But, remember... Constant vigilance!"

Everybody was sick and tired of hearing him say that for the millionth time. Then again, he was right. It was important to always be looking over one's shoulder. Especially during these times of hidden warfare.

Lyra was about to turn and chat with Sirius and Remus, seeing as she had quite a bit of time on her hands. But before she could, her currently pink-haired niece called out for her. "Lyra! Do you have a minute?"

"For you, Nymphadora? Always." Lyra winked teasingly, knowing that her niece hated her first name. That wasn't ever going to stop her from using it, though. In her mind, Tonks was her brother-in-law, not his daughter. 

Nymphadora pouted, crossing her arms across her chest like she was a child. Again, in Lyra's eyes, she really was a child. She had known her since she was five, after all. "Am I ever going to convince you not to call me that?"

The blonde shook her head, grinning widely. "I wouldn't count on it."

"Damn it," the younger woman cursed. But she quickly turned her brilliant smile back on, showing her more bubbly Hufflepuff side. "But, anyway, I was wondering if you had any plans tonight?"

Lyra frowned, as nobody in the Order ever really asked each other to do things outside of the meetings. Than again, Nymphadora wasn't just any member, she was family. "No, Lucius isn't coming home until tomorrow and I've old the house elves not to tell him I've gone out. Why? Have any big plans?"

"Actually, yes. I'm having dinner with my parents tonight," the younger woman revealed. "I haven't told them that I've seen you. They know about the Order, though. I was just wondering if... if you want to, if you want to come with me?"

Lyra froze for a moment. She had just thought about her sister that same morning, wondering how she was doing. She had been too scared to ask Nymphadora, worried she'd be hit with a longing and need to see Andromeda. It's not like they'd know it'd be safe. That night would be a rare safe occasion where Lyra didn't need to worry about her husband.

"Oh..." she trailed off. She wanted to, of course, but it was terrifying to think about. She didn't know why she was scared, she knew her and Andromeda would love one another unconditionally but she was a bit scared of the change it would bring. She knew there was no going back from the path she had chosen now, but seeing her sister would make it true. More true than she thought possible. 

Nymphadora quickly sensed her hesitation and felt a bit awkward, not having wanted her to feel uncomfortable. "You don't have to. I just thought it'd be nice for you and mum to see each other again."

"It would be. Sure, I'll come," Lyra nodded, deciding not to overthink it. Overthinking was what got her in the situation she was in today. "Do they still live in the same house as when you were a kid?"

"No, we moved a long time ago. I'll write down the address for you." Tonks hurried to grab a piece of parchment and some ink excitedly, obviously happy at the prospect of her aunt and mother reconnecting. 

Lyra shifted uncomfortably as she watched her niece write the address down and handing it to her. "Thanks, Nymphadora. I'm sure we'll have a good time. It'll be good to see Andromeda and Ted again. When should I come by?"

"Dinner starts at six, so anytime before that, I suppose. I'm going there soon to start dinner. I'm not going to make it, I promise!" the younger woman quickly added after seeing the horrified look on her aunt's face. 

"Thank Merlin. I was about to come up with some excuse to why I can't, but if your father's the one cooking then it's fine," Lyra chuckled, remembering how good of a cook Ted Tonks was. She tried to go over to their house as much as possible the summer of '77 just to eat dinner there. Not that Euphemia Potter wasn't a great cook that summer. But there was something so homey about Ted's. 

"I'll see you tonight then?" The former Hufflepuff's eyes gleamed with a new excitement and hopefulness that they all had been lacking ever since the Dark Lord had returned. Lyra had missed it. 

"You will," Lyra confirmed, grasping onto the piece of parchment with her sister's address. 

Nymphadora turned around, ready to leave for her parents' house, while Lyra took a deep breath, trying to prepare herself for that night.

"Going to see Andy?" Sirius asked from behind her, obviously  having been eavesdropping on their whole conversation. Probably just in hopes he could make a dramatic entrance. It was a shock how Nymphadora seemed to be the only one who wasn't incredibly dramatic in their family. 

"Stop eavesdropping, git!" Lyra grabbed the first thing in sight, a candle, and threw it at his face, but he caught it with ease, tilting his head at her. "And yes, I'm going to see Andy. For the first time since I was seventeen. A bit terrifying."

Sirius raised an eyebrow at her, leaning against the wall behind him. She had always been a bit more of the nervous type compared to him. It was one of the biggest things that set them apart. "It'll be fine, Lyra. It's Andy, after all. She's your sister."

Lyra tried to smile convincingly, hoping that he wouldn't sense the nervousness that still lingered within her. "You're right. And if I could handle your diva personality after all these years, I can definitely handle Andy."

The dark-haired man scoffed, feigning offense. "You're calling me a diva? I'm nothing compared to you."

She stayed quiet for a second, only slightly smiling. For a moment, Sirius wondered if she was planning a way to kill him. But instead, she only sighed softly. "I missed this. For a long time, I've missed just being you and me."

Sirius had agreed, of course. He had spent day in and day out thinking about those he loved on the outside. Lyra was definitely one of them. Having them with him now, that was everything he could have ever asked for. "Well, that's not going to change now."

"It better not or I'll hex you," she threatened. Internally, she thought that she'd hex anyone that tried to mess this up. Even if it was the Dark Lord himself. 

He squared up, as if ready for a fight, challenging her. She only looked unimpressed at his stance. "Alright, you just try me, smartass."

Lyra rolled her eyes, taking a step forth and punched him in the shoulder, where he had no defense. "Ow, Lyra!"

She only winked at him as she stepped out of the room, watching him rub where she had struck him. 

▹▹▹

Lyra couldn't help but be nervous as she stood outside the house that belonged to the Tonks family. It was larger than the one they had lived in when she last saw him, but also a lot more remote. There weren't any houses around for miles. She suspected they liked the privacy now that tensions were growing. 

She lifted her hand to knock on the door, but hesitated for a moment. It wasn't too late to back out, she could send a letter and pretend to be sick or something. But then she would have to come up with a new excuse every time Nymphadora would invite her. She had a feeling this wouldn't be the last time. 

But in the end, Lyra decided that she was going to be brave. Bravery was pretty new to Lyra, something she had lacked in her youth but had shown up for her in the past few years. 

She could hear some muffled voices calling out to each other. Probably arguing about who would get the door. In the end, someone started twisting the doorknob, opening the door. 

Lyra wanted to cry the moment she saw her sister's face. She tried to stifle a gasp. Andromeda was as beautiful as she'd always been, but so much older than she remembered, being in her forties now. But she kept forgetting how much they all looked alike. Them, Narcissa and Bellatrix. 

"Hi Andy," she breathed, blinking quickly to keep tears from forming. 

Andromeda was stunned for a moment. Her daughter had told her she was coming (and gotten a proper scolding for hiding them being in touch from her), but she hadn't been as prepared as she thought for seeing her baby sister in front of her, all grown with eyes full of sadness. The last time she had seen her, they were full of joy and hope for her life. That was all gone. 

The older of the sisters didn't say a word, not really knowing what to say. Honestly, she was getting a little choked up and didn't know if she would be able to speak. Instead, she just reached out and pulled Lyra into her arms. 

That broke Lyra. She couldn't keep the tears back, sniffling as she felt Andromeda's embrace again. It reminded her a bit of whenever she'd hug their mother, who, even though she had disowned Andromeda, Lyra missed dearly. 

"It's good to see you again, Lyra," Andromeda whispered quietly, knowing that if she spoke any louder her voice would probably break. "It's been far too long."

"You could say that," Lyra agreed, pulling back and wiping at her eyes after a tear fell. She took a moment to study her sister, the grey strands of hair and the wrinkles around her eyes that had come with time. "You've gotten older."

Andromeda chuckled, knowing that she meant no offense. She was surprised herself at the reminder that Lyra wasn't a teenager anymore, much less a child. Still, she couldn't help but joke. "I see time hasn't taught you any manners yet."

"Perhaps I'll learn before eighteen more years have passed," the blonde joked back, both of them smiling slightly at each other. She then glanced inside the house, hesitating about walking inside.  "Can I come in?"

Andromeda had obviously forgotten and flushed red, feeling awkward. It was strange, this was her sister who she had known since she was born, yet she was so eager to impress her and not have anything go wrong. "Of course, come on."

She took a step through the door, observing the pictures on the walls detailing the Tonks' ageing, Nymphadora growing up and the lives they had lived when Lyra was estranged from them. She wanted to hear about it all. 

After following Andromeda through the house and towards the kitchen, the youngest of the women, Nymphadora herself, grinned and rushed at her aunt, hugging her from the side. "Lyra, I'm glad you came."

"Me too, Nymphadora," she responded sincerely, though she had been nervous. But seeing her sister again had made it all worth it. The amazing smell coming from the stove didn't hurt either. She just wondered where the last family member was. 

"Oi, Lyra, not going to say hi to your brother-in-law?" a male voice asked from behind her. And standing in the doorway, in all his glory, was Ted Tonks himself. He had gray streaks through his hair and had a bit of stubble now, but it suited him. He looked like a proper dad. 

"Well, I don't really have many other choices, do I?" Lyra joked. She had missed being around this side of her family altogether, but she had really missed Ted's humor. "But even if I did, you'd be the best by far, Ted."

"Always the charmer." Ted then walked towards her, wrapping his arms around her and engulfing her in a hug. He was quite a bit larger than her, so it was a properly nice one. It felt warm and kind. "I've missed you."

"I've missed you, too," Lyra responded, the side of her her face squished into his chest. She didn't mind, though. Ted always made her feel safe, even if he was a muggleborn, meaning he was in more danger than most. "Especially your cooking."

"You'll have a flavorful reunion tonight, I promise." He grinned cheekily as he pulled away from her, though keeping his hands on her upper arms. With Andromeda, she had wanted to cry but with Ted she couldn't stop smiling. 

"Come on, Lyra, we've got to catch up," Andromeda spoke up again, walking to her husband and leaning her head on his shoulder lovingly. "Tell us everything that's been going on with you since we last saw you."

The blonde grimaced, thinking about how to tell them everything that had happened the last eighteen years, and not really knowing if she could tell them everything (some were secrets from the Order). "Well, that's quite a lot. It's also rather depressing so I don't think it makes good dinner conversation."

"I've heard it all. It is rather depressing," Nymphadora agreed, trying to taste a bit of her the food her father was cooking, but he stopped her, wiggling his finger in her face to say no. 

That didn't make Andromeda feel any better about not having reached out to her sister in the past few years. "Well, how about something a bit more cheery to start things off? How's Draco? I haven't seen him since..."

Lyra could tell she regretted it the moment she said it, because they knew the circumstances around it were rather tragic. "Since James was murdered, I was arrested and had to plead with them to let you take care of him until I was released."

"Please tell me it doesn't get more depressing than that."

"Not when it comes Draco at least." Lyra was trying to look on the bright side of things, as he was the biggest light of her life. "He's doing great. He's a prefect, actually. A Slytherin, of course. He looks like a proper Malfoy, but I see some Black in him. He's got our dramatics at least."

"You Blacks and your drama," Ted chuckled, using his wand to stir in one of the pots he was cooking something in. "It's hard to keep up sometimes."

Nymphadora grinned, bumping shoulders with her father proudly. It was clear she was pretty close with him. "Good thing I'm more of a Tonks then."

"Wouldn't have been able to survive if you weren't." He turned and winked at the two sisters, who knew he was doing this just to wind them up. It was one of his favorite hobbies with his wife, but they always knew it was just a joke. They didn't take it seriously.

"Oh, shut up, Ted!" Lyra and Andromeda said at the same time. They both blushed slightly and looked away when they realized. All that time apart didn't make them any less similar. 

He didn't stop smiling. He was always so happy, no matter what was going on. Lyra couldn't help but admire that about him. She supposed it was a Hufflepuff thing. "You're not going to be that mad at me now that dinner's done."

"I'll love you forever," Lyra said jokingly. But, deep inside, she knew she meant it. She looked at her sister, her brother-in-law and her niece, her family, and she knew that even if they were going to be seperated for decades she would always love them.

It didn't matter that Ted wasn't her real brother, he was just like one. It didn't matter that she hadn't been able to see Nymphadora grow up, she was still her niece. And it definitely didn't matter that her and Andromeda had spent so much time apart, because they were still sisters who shared a strong bond that they would never be able to break. 

And Lyra smiled. Because now, she was finally in a house that felt a little bit like a home. 

▹▹▹

A/N: IT'S BEEN A MILLION YEARS, I'M SO SORRY! I've missed Lyra a lot, though, that's why I wrote this chapter a little longer than usual. From this point on, there's not that much left to do in OOTP (there's still some left though, about six chapters, I think. Perhaps even a little nostalgia from the last book), but that will only lead us into HBP, which I'm excited for. Also, thank you guys so much for over 100k on this sequel and we're closing in on 500k on Instead soon