「 WHAT ARE NARGLES 」

IT WAS ONLY THE BEGINNING of October, and Theodore Nott was already filled with the when will the school year end mood that takes over a student's mind at least once a year.

This feeling was amplified by the fact that Hogwarts was no longer as it used to be. The halls now often deserted, the constant buzz of chatter was replaced by an eerie silence that may as well have belonged to a graveyard, and the lively air of the school has been vacuumed out through the high windows to make way for the chilled air produced by the dementors that roamed the school grounds although the Carrows have promised that they wouldn't have any effect on the inside of the castle, that they were merely there to punish the brats that would dare to leave the castle without supervision.

All in all, the year was going on perfectly. Absolutely fantastic.

Theo stumbled upon something on the floor and his heart skipped to his neck in panic. He whipped around, drawing his wand, though deep down he knew that he had simply walked over a dislodged stone on the floor. Nevertheless, it took him quite some time to get his heartbeat under control, and telling himself that there was nothing to be scared of, he put his wand back inside his pocket and continued on his way to the Astronomy Tower.

It was only twenty minutes before the curfew was to start, a voice inside his head reminded him, although he knew there was nothing to worry about. The Slytherins were favoured by the Carrows, especially those that came from as prestigious a family as his. Most of the Slytherin students who were under the good graces of the Death Eater siblings were allowed to roam the castle as though it belonged to them, and often earned points for themselves by hexing a random blood traitor, or, as the Carrows liked to put it – keeping them where they belonged.

Thus, Theo really had nothing to worry about. He could strut along the corridors while singing obnoxiously loudly, and the Carrows would worship him simply because his father was one of the Dark Lord's earliest and most trusted followers.

Unfortunately, the thought didn't bring much satisfaction to him as it normally would have.

Moonlight flooded over him all of a sudden, making him blink in surprise, and he realised that he had reached the Astronomy Tower. His feet padded softly over the stairs as he climbed quietly, hoping to get some peace and quiet that was so hard found these days. A semicircular area came up before him when he pushed the door open, which moved with a rusty grunt, and heaving a relieved sigh he walked out into the open, wishing that he could simply jump into the open air and float away out of this prison, for prison the Hogwarts Castle has become, where no one was allowed to leave the walls without express permission from the Headmaster himself.

He stepped towards the edge of the tower and placed his hands over the parapet, his fingers gripping the stone tightly. A terrible sense of longing swept through him as he was struck by a sudden thought – this was his last year of school. Some bloody rotten luck he had, he thought to himself, for his last year had to end this way. Seven years before, when he was still waiting for his Hogwarts letter to arrive, would he have imagined at all that this was what his last year would be like? No excitement, no good times with friends? Standing on a cliff, where any moment, he could slip and fall into a war that was swelling below him?

His eyes roamed over the Hogwarts grounds before him. He tried to ignore the dementors gliding across the sky, and the reminder that this was where Dumbledore had died just months before, that this was where his body had stumbled over the edge and crumpled into a heap down below. Instead, he focused his eyes into the Forbidden Forest that stood dark against the indigo sky, the crowns of the trees swaying slightly in the breeze. As a young boy, he had been irrationally afraid of the forest, fearing that it held creatures that only appeared in his nightmares, and one step toward it would result in those god awful creatures to swarm down upon him and punish him for embarking upon their territory.

How ironic it was that the Forbidden Forest seemed to be the safest place to be in right now.

Theo slid his arms across the top of the parapet and folded them in front of him before resting his head on them. His mind reminded him again of the nearing of the curfew – or had he already passed it? – but as usual, he ignored it. His eyes fell shut and he felt himself drifting away when suddenly, a voice called out from behind him and he whirled around in a panic, drawing his wand.

The tip of his wand met the nose of a girl, who didn't look the slightest bit disturbed or startled by his reaction. She stood calmly, eyes dreamy, and Theo felt that maybe she really was living in a dreamland, where Hogwarts was as it had been before, and where they weren't in the verge of war. He wished he could be there as well.

Deciding that the girl posed no harm, he stowed his wand away and slid it into his pocket though his fingers kept a moderately firm grip on it. He tried to remember who the girl was, but the only word that came to mind was loony – he remembered Draco referring to her as such one day – but he couldn't remember her actual name.

"You should be in your common room," said the girl in a voice as dreamy as her eyes. "It's nearing curfew."

Theo almost snorted. He couldn't decide whether she was being cocky or just plain stupid. Considering the Ravenclaw robes she was wearing, it was unlikely that she could be either of them.

"What are you doing here then?" he spat at her and let go of his wand as she began to walk daintily across the place to reach the parapet. She didn't seem to be very harmful.

"I'm looking for the Nargles," she stated. "They don't do well with dementors so I thought I might find them lurking around here somewhere."

His brows weaved into a confused frown. "What are Nargles?"

But the girl ignored him and continued her search.

Standing awkwardly for a few more seconds, Theo decided to leave. He cleared his throat to get her attention, and when she looked up at him, he spoke. "Well, I'm going then. You better get back to your common room too."

She smiled at him. "I will."

With his hands in his pockets, Theo left the tower and strutted down the stairs, wondering what time it was. He roamed the corridors aimlessly, time drew on, and he watched the shadows flickering eerily in the dark. Thankfully, he came across no one – not that it would've mattered anyway – and when he thought it was way past midnight, he decided to head to the common room. His feet made soft noises as his shoes slapped against the stone and finally, he reached the Slytherin dungeons. The door swung open upon saying the password and he went into the dorms, only to realise he wasn't sleepy at all.

It has been happening quite frequently nowadays. He could hardly get his eyes to close at night, and on the rare occasions that they did, he would subsequently wake up with nightmares. He absolutely loathed having nightmares – it made him feel weak and vulnerable, words he had never used to describe himself. Thus, he stayed awake at night, keeping himself busy until it turned into a habit.

It usually resulted in him feeling completely drained out during the classes, but he couldn't care less about them.

Therefore, he decided to try and complete some of the essays he had been putting off for a while instead of roaming around aimlessly. He went up to his dormitory, got his bag and some books, and returned to the dimly lit common room, where he sat next to one of the fireplaces, and watched for a moment as the fire flickered and turned brighter upon sensing his presence. He spread his books in front of him. Leaning back against an armchair, he began to read.

The soft, green glow of the fire shone upon his eyelids and caressed his cheeks. It was almost like the fire was inducing euphoria in him, making his eyes go heavy. A sensation of comfort and pleasure spread through him, and before long, he fell asleep.

He couldn't have fallen into a deep sleep, for he woke up as soon as he heard Blaise's voice from the other side of the room.

"What are you doing down here?" The question carried all the way to him, sounding as though he was standing just next to his ear. His voice tended to do that, being low and yet reaching every corner of a room. Blaise walked over to him. "You haven't been sleeping at all."

Theo made a sort of uninterested grunt. "I was sleeping until you woke me up."

"I wouldn't call that sleeping," Blaise continued in his monotonous voice. "You'll give yourself sore back and neck."

He groaned, hoping this would send Blaise away. His hands formed fists and rubbed at his eyes with the knuckles – he was sleepy and tired, too tired. But he couldn't get himself to sleep. There was something about his bed that instantly made all drowsiness fly away and he would be left lying there, eyes miserably fixed on the ceiling. He turned back to his book and tried reading, thinking that perhaps this would make Blaise leave.

Blaise, however, didn't take the hint or chose not to. He sat on the armchair and peered at the books in front of him. "You're doing your homework now?" he asked with unfeigned disgust lacing his voice.

Theo smiled. "I'm trying to. Not sure how successful I'll be."

Scrambling with his hands, he picked up a book at random and placed it on his knees, opening it to a random page. His eyes grazed over the pages, but the words were blurred, dancing in the luminescent firelight. He blinked a few times, feeling like a three-year-old just learning to read. The sentences made no sense to him, the pictures sneered at him mockingly, and the pages flipped morosely at his lack of interest. He heard Blaise sigh behind him.

"Get back to bed, Theo." He knelt beside him and began to gather the books into his arms. "I'll put these back in your bag."

Theo opened his mouth to tell him that sleep was a farfetched dream to him now, that sleeping would only result in nightmares. But no words came out of his mouth and giving an obedient nod, he rose to his feet and dragged himself to the dormitory.

His bed was neatly made, for he hardly ever used it these days. Already regretting his decision to come here, he climbed onto it and slid under the sheets, the familiar smell of mildew greeting his nostrils. He had forgotten what his bed felt like, and he began to hope that maybe he would get a good sleep tonight, though a small part of him pointed out that it was probably wishful thinking. Nevertheless, he closed his eyes and waited for sleep to come.

When he heard Blaise's footsteps shuffling beside his bed, he leaned on his elbow with a sigh. He drew the curtains of his fourposter bed back and looked at his friend, who was now arranging his books – some into his bag, and some on the table beside his bed. Blaise looked at him questioningly, though didn't say anything.

"Do you know what Nargles are?" he asked, suddenly remembering what the Ravenclaw girl had told him earlier. Her name also clicked in his mind now – Luna Lovegood. He had witnessed some of the younger Slytherins laughing at and about her before. She was a year below him, and hence, he wasn't too familiar with her.

"Nargles?" Blaise repeated. "What are those?"

"That's what I'm asking you," he replied with a shake of his head and sat up, deciding that sleep was an unattainable luxury.

"I don't know." Blaise shrugged and asked no more, leaving Theo, once again, to wonder how on earth someone could have zero curiosity.

He twiddled his thumbs lazily. Blaise sat down in front of him, long legs folded underneath. "So you're not going to sleep at all?"

Theo shrugged. "I'll try. You don't have to worry about me. Go to sleep."

A frown creased his forehead. "Are you sure?"

He shrugged again.

"You'll have to wake up early tomorrow."

"I know."

After a few minutes of hesitation, Blaise bid him goodnight and went back to his fourposter bed, drawing the curtains securely around him. Theo stared at where he had disappeared for a moment, before quickly flitting his eyes away. He waited until the familiar sound of Blaise's snores filled up the air and then stood up again to go to the common room, where he chose the same seat again. The fire, as before, flickered to life when it sensed his presence, and he spent the rest of the night staring at the crackling flames, occasionally drifting in and out of a restless slumber.