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Deep 12

I watched Heartstopper this morning. On the TV. In front of my grandma and my younger brother.
My grandma asked me if it was a gay movie with a tone. A tone like she hates it so much. My younger brother kept laughing while saying gay, gay and disgusting.
I don't know how to describe my feelings at that time. Uncomfortable, annoyed and... disappointed. A thought came to my mind immediately: "what if they find out that I'm not straight, that I'm still confused but I know I might be a lesbian?"
I know that my grandma is the older generation, so it's unavoidable to think like that. But my brother. I thought that he is young, then might be he won't be too dramatic about it. But he said like he is a homophobic person. I truly don't know how to feel about it.

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Tags: #deep#tanvan