#LGS1LGMtotheRescue #LGS1Chapter38 #LaGrilla1 #LaGrilla

***

"LEO!" iyak ni Imee habang panay ang katok sa pinto ng office room.

Nakailang katok pa siya bago nadatnan ni Yaya Lumeng.

Noong una ay naaawang pinanood lang siya ng katulong na tila hindi malaman ang gagawin. Nang hindi na nito kayanin ang paghihirap niya at ang hitsura niya na basang-basa ng luha ang mukha ay marahan na itong lumapit. Niyapos siya nito mula sa likuran, kasama ang kaniyang mga braso para pigilan siya sa kakakatok.

"Tama na, hija," alo nito sa kaniya. "Hindi makabubuting pilitin natin si Sir kung ayaw n'ya tayong kausapin."

Imee got back to her senses. She recalled the root of this problem. It happened because she forced Leo to do something that he was not yet ready for. She would only scare him more if she dared to even break down the door with her knocking.

"Ano ang dapat kong gawin, yaya?" lumuluhang makaawa ni Imee babang nangungulila na agad na nakatitig sa saradong pinto. "Alam kong dapat kong irespeto kung kailan handa si Leo makipagkita pero mukhang hindi na darating ang araw na 'yon. S'ya mismo ang nagsabi na h'wag na 'kong magpapakita kahit kailan!"

Dahan-dahan siyang pinakawalan ng ginang at pinihit paharap dito. Nagwika ito sa mas mahinang boses. "Tara sa sala, hija. Tawagan natin sina Sir Claude. Hindi mo kaya 'to nang mag-isa."

Sa sobrang panghihina ng loob ay hikbi na lang ang naisagot niya rito.

Pinunasan ng isang kamay ng matanda ang mga luha sa kaniyang mga pisngi.

"Hay, kung alam ko lang talaga kung bakit nagkakaganyan si Sir Leo, siguro, makatutulong ako sa kan'ya. Pero malamang, wala akong maitutulong. Dahil kung meron, humingi na si Sir ng tulong sa 'kin, katulad ng pakikisuyo n'ya sa 'kin na ipagluto siya, ipagtimpla ng kape, ipaglinis ng bahay, o paghanapin ng mga nawawalang paper clip." Naiiyak na natawa ito bago natapos sa pagpunas sa mga luha niya. Yaya Lumeng gave her a hopeful stare. "Mabuti na lang at nandito ka na. Kung hindi s'ya naging okay matapos kausapin ni Sir Jamer, baka ikaw at ang iba pa n'yang mga kaibigan ang makapagpagaan sa pakiramdam n'ya."

***

"YES, we know," sagot ni Claude sa tanong ni Imee kung aware sila tungkol sa trauma ni Leo kaya naman napatanga siya saglit.

Nasa living room na ang mga ito ng townhouse ni Leo—si Claude, Kero, at Juxe. Hindi nakarating ang iba dahil may mga commitment na hindi na puwedeng ikansela. Hindi rin sila nataranta dahil hindi naman idinetalye ni Yaya Lumeng ang dahilan ng pagpapaunta nito kay Claude sa bahay ni Leo. Wala naman kasing alam ang katulong tungkol sa pinagdadaanan ng amo nito. So, she just called Claude on the telephone and asked him to bring along his friends because Imee was having a problem with Leo.

"Bakit wala kayong ginawa?" Hindi pa rin makapaniwala si Imee na alam na pala ng mga ito ang traumatic past ni Leo.

"I don't know how to answer that," seryosong sagot ni Kero para sa kanila nina Claude at Juxe. "Knowing his sex history might turn you off or offend you—"

"Hindi!" maagap niyang saad. "Alam ko na naman, e. Hindi rin naman inilihim ni Leo sa 'kin na marami na siyang experience."

Kero exchanged glances with his friends. Their eyes showed approval, so he faced her and continued. "Having sex with different women became his coping mechanism. Sabi n'ya, para daw hindi lang si Melissa ang babae na naaalala n'ya kapag sex na ang usapan. You see, we never stopped reminding him that going on a sex spree won't help. We even always suggest that he should see a therapist. Yet, we did not do anything much other than that because he insists that he can handle it, and of course, we can't force him to do something.

"He's just quite a Mr. Know-It-All. When Leo does something or say something, ayaw n'yang kinukuwestiyon siya. He wants people to just believe in him, to rely on the fact that he knows what he's doing."

Hindi na nakapagtataka kung bakit kapag ayaw ni Leo na pag-usapan ang isang bagay ay hindi ito nagpapatinag. Kinumpirma na ng mga kaibigan nito na ayaw pala talaga nito na kinukuwestiyon ang bawat galaw nito.

"At 'yong tungkol sa sex video, ginagamit daw 'yon ni Melissa na panakot noon kay Leo," dagdag ni Juxe. "But Leo asked Jamer for help. Nang ma-retrieve ang videos, he had a breakdowm so bad, we took care of Leo for months. Kaya no'ng nadispatsa na 'yong videos, he felt much better. Nakampante naman kami. Because from the way he behaved since then, he seemed to have forgotten about the videos and his trauma too. Mas pinoproblema na lang n'ya no'ng mga panahon na 'yon ang paghahanap sa 'yo."

"Yeah," Claude sighed. Humithit na ito ng sigarilyo. "Ayaw kong palakihin ang ulo mo, but I think, Leo really loves you that just the thought of you can get his mind away from his traumatic experience. Maybe, he even thinks that you're the only one who can save him."

"I agree with that," segunda ni Juxe bago naningkit ang mga mata nito at tinitigan siya nang masama. "But I think we are wrong. You did not save him. Ano'ng ginawa mo? Bakit nagkaganyan si Leo?"

She felt uncomfortable. Tiningnan na kasi siya ng mga ito nang masama.

"Did you trigger him?" Claude hissed. "How?"

Napapikit na lang siya. "I forced him. I forced him to tell me all about that sex video. 'Yon naman talaga ang dahilan kaya naghiwalay kami. Ipinakita sa 'kin ni Melissa ang sex video, kaya ang akala ko tuloy noon, pinagtaksilan ako ni Leo." Hindi na niya napigilan ang maluha. "Ni hindi man lang ako naniwala no'ng sinabi n'ya sa 'kin na college pa s'ya no'n."

"Let me guess," ani Juxe, may himig ng panunumbat. "Nagpadala ka sa reputasyon n'ya. Kilala mo na playboy kaya nang makitaan mo s'ya ng butas, nakalimutan mo nang magtiwala sa kan'ya. 'Yong reputasyon na naman n'ya ang ginawa mong basehan sa paghuhusga sa kaibigan namin."

"How was I supposed to know? Ni hindi ko nga makita ang kulay ng buhok n'ya ro'n dahil medyo madilim! Nakapokus 'yong liwanag ng video sa katawan hanggang sa mukha niya! Ang malala pa ro'n, narinig ng anak ni Melissa, ni Ava, ang lahat-lahat. Kaya galit na galit na s'ya ngayon kay Leo. Marami s'yang binitiwang masasakit na mga salita. Nasampal pa n'ya si Leo . . ." Nahihiyang napayuko siya ng ulo. ". . . dahil sa katangahan ko."

Napamura na lang si Juxe sa narinig. "Kayong mga babae talaga . . . sasagutin n'yo kaming mga lalaki, pero pagdududahan n'yo pa rin kami!"

Claude shook slowly and pulled the cigarette away from his lips. "It's not her fault, men. Wala naman s'yang alam sa pinagdadaanan ni Leo. If she only knew all about this, she could have done things differently." He gave her an upward nod. "Right, Imee?"

Imee nodded slowly in response. Nanunubig na naman ang mga mata niya sa sobrang pagsisisi sa pamimilit kay Leo na ipaliwanag ang sex video nito noon.

Claude went on. "I'm not speaking for everyone who has trauma, but based on what I saw from Leo, h'wag na h'wag mo siyang pangungunahan. H'wag kang paladesisyon sa mga dapat n'yang gawin o aminin. You can give suggestions every once in a while, when the timing is right, but never ever force him to do something."

"But maybe, it's really time to bring him to a psychiatrist," Juxe suggested shortly after he cussed.

Claude slowly turned his head and glared at Juxe. "Bingi ka ba? Kasasabi ko lang na h'wag siyang pupuwersahin, 'di ba? Alam mo namang ayaw ni Leo 'yan!"

"Sabi mo rin, huwag pangungunahan. E, bakit pinangungunahan mo si Leo? Malay mo, this time, gusto na n'yang makipagkita sa therapist!" depensa ni Juxe.

Kero got worried. "Should we take the risk? Remember, kilalang lawyer na s'ya ngayon, baka maging isyu pa 'yan, mawalan pa s'ya ng kredibilidad sa dahilan na psychological problem. May ongoing pa s'yang kaso laban do'n sa Almario, 'di ba? It's a high profiled case, because the suspect's a governor's son, right?"

Napahithit ng sigarilyo si Claude. "I don't know. I'm clueless about law and stuff. But I don't think the public will know why Leo's seeing a therapist, right?"

Meanwhile, Juxe shrugged. "Well, since it's up to us for now, let's just do the usual. Just . . . be his emotional support."

Claude sighed in surrender, puffing out his cigarette smoke at the same breath. "Yeah, agree. I want to do something more than that, because I feel like we're not doing enough for our friend, but what else can we do? We're not experts." Binalingan siya nito. "Imee, you hold the ace in this setup. Mas makatutulong ka kay Leo."

Her eyes switched from Claude, to Kero, then to Juxe. It was a little intimidating to see the mix of concern and graveness in their eyes and facial expressions.

"S-Sigurado ka ba?" balik ng mga mata niya kay Claude. "How can I emotionally support him? Kasi dahil sa nangyari, parang ako pa ang mas nagpalala sa sakit na nararamdaman n'ya."

"We're not sure, but we have to try anything to help our friend. Ikaw? Gusto mo bang makatulong?"

"Oo naman!" mabilis niyang sagot. "Ano ang kailangan kong gawin?"

Nakaramdam siya ng pag-asa kaya naman determinado na siyang alamin kung sa paanong paraan siya makatutulong kay Leo. Ano pa ba ang dapat niyang ikatakot kung tutulungan siya ng mga kaibigan ni Leo? Wala!

"Just comfort him. Huwag mong galitin 'yon. Huwag ka munang kokontra sa mga sasabihin n'ya," seryosong sagot ni Claude.

Gumusot ang mukha niya. "Pero ang sabi n'ya, mukha s'yang pera at marumi s'ya, at masamang tao. Hindi naman ako makapapayag do'n!"

"Yeah, right. You're blinded by love so you see him as the perfect man. A demigod of some sort," Claude remarked sarcastically before he immediately switched into a deadly serious demeanor. "Pero kapag kinontra mo ang mga sinabi n'ya, you're just invalidating his feelings! His experience!"

Lalo siyang nagulohan. "Paano'ng invalidate? Naniniwala naman ako sa mga side ng k'wento n'ya. Ang ayoko ay 'yong mga inile-label n'ya sa sarili n'ya. Mas lalo lang s'yang malulungkot at mandidiri sa sarili n'ya. . . ."

"I know you mean well, Imee. We're used to using flowery and kind words to make people feel better, but that's not what Leo needs. He wants to be heard. He had been hiding the truth for so long, so what he needs at this point is for the truth to prevail. Kaya iwasan mo ang pambobola sa kan'ya. It will only make him feel invalidated."

Imee took in a deep breath. "Saludo na talaga ako sa mga therapist. Grabe, nakakaya nila ang makipag-deal sa gan'tong kakomplikadong mga bagay?"

"How I wish, gan'yan din ang naiisip ni Leo. Para magpa-schedule na s'ya," Claude sighed in frustration while looking away.

"Sa ngayon, dapat mong kayanin 'to, Imee," singit ni Juxe. "Iyon ay kung gusto mong makasama si Leo hanggang sa huli."

Napatitig si Imee rito. 'Sa huli?'

"You love Leo, right?" Kero prodded.

Imee nodded.

"Then stick with him. Until the end," pakiusap nito.

Tinampal ni Juxe si Kero sa braso. Offended na nanlisik agad ang mga mata nito sa katabi sa mahabang sofa.

"Kero, don't pressure her. She's free to leave Leo whenever she wants," Juxe scolded.

"Alam ko! Alam na rin 'yan ni Imee kasi common sense na 'yan! Kailangan talagang mamalo?" Inambahan pa nito ng palo si Juxe pero hindi rin natuloy dahil nagsalita si Claude.

Claude brought them back to the original topic. "Then, make directness the base and foundation of your interactions from now on." Imee nodded at what he said. "Just let him talk. You don't have to contradict or correct what he says. He needs to be heard. He wants to be heard because he never got to use his own voice to speak in his own defense, which is ironic for a lawyer like him who speaks to defend others. Maybe, let your actions speak more. Yakapin mo s'ya. Halikan mo s'ya—"

"Pero dapat parehong okay lang sa inyo ang magyakap o maghalikan," paalala ni Juxe sa background.

Claude did not stop talking, "—make him feel good for saying the truth, okay?"

"Will that heal him?" she asked in a small voice.

Claude immediately crushed his cigarette on the coffee table's ash tray the same way he crushed her new hope that was slowly budding with his frankness.

"No, silly." Tumayo na si Claude mula sa kinauupuan nito. "Pero makatutulong 'yon. We know, because we have been in this situation before. Leo got a terrible emotional breakdown two years ago, and we gave him emotional support."

Lalong nadurog ang puso ni Imee sa napagtanto. 'Two years ago . . . ibig sabihin, pagkatapos naming maghiwalay, may pinagdaanang breakdown si Leo kaya matagal n'ya akong hindi pinansin o pinuntahan noon?'

Then, the men excused themselves to go and visit Leo in his office room.

***

HINDI pa lubusang nahihimasmasan si Leo mula nang umalis si Imee ay nakarinig na siya ng katok sa pinto ng office room. He took in a deep, shuddering inhale, and prepared himself.

That interaction with Imee was unexpected, and he didn't like the way it went. Tiyak na nasaktan niya ang dalaga sa nangyari, which was ironic when one of the reasons why he was pushing her away was to prevent hurting her much further. Ngunit umaasa siya na binalikan siya ni Imee kaya pinakalma ni Leo ang sarili habang patungo sa pinto. Naihilamos pa niya sa mukha ang isang kamay bago inabot ang seradura ng pinto.

This time, he was going to be more composed. He would speak more softly to her.

Pagbukas ng pinto ay lumaylay ang mga balikat niya. Instead of Imee, he saw Claude, Cherubim, and Juxe. Bahagyang naningkit ang kaniyang mga mata.

'Sunod-sunod yata ang pagbisita nila sa 'kin dito?'

"Man," ani Kero, "can we talk?"

Inisa-isa niya ng tingin ang mga ito bago tumalikod at nagtungo sa sofa ng office room. He shoved the duvet on one side of the sofa and topped it with two pillows. Narinig niya ang pagpasok ng tatlong lalaki at ang marahang pag-click ng pinto pasara.

Inayos niya ang pagkakarolyo hanggang sa siko ng sleeves ng puti niyang button-down polo. It wasn't tucked in, covering the thigh part of his loose green pajamas.

As he busied himself with picking up the scattered folders on the floor, he asked, "What brings you all here?"

"You, of course," upo ni Kero sa swivel chair sa kaniyang desk. Kero had to readjust his red scoop neck shirt that almost revealed his left shoulder. He turned the chair, exposing his legs in blue jeans, and his white sneakers. Itinukod nito ang siko sa arm rest ng swivel chair at inihilig ang ulo para masuklay bahagya ng mga daliri. "Are you having another breakdown again?"

Leo put more effort into keeping it together. "Sino'ng nagsabi? Si Jamer?"

"Tumawag si Yaya Lumeng. Nag-aalala dahil nagsisigawan kayo rito ni Imee kanina."

"I didn't hurt her. I almost did, though," tuwid niya ng tayo, hawak ang mga folder. "At baka masaktan pa s'ya lalo ng mga masasabi ko, kaya pinauwi ko na."

Claude was already sitting on the sofa that he cleared from the pillows and duvet. He smoothed his black, long-sleeved turtleneck shirt and black slacks with his hands to avoid wrinkling them. "Ayaw mo palang masaktan s'ya, bakit pinagtatabuyan mo? Sa tingin mo ba, hindi masakit 'yon?"

"At least, iyon, temporary lang. Mas mainam na lumayo na s'ya sa lalaking katulad ko. Wala na rin naman akong mukhang maihaharap sa kan'ya." Leo put the folders on his desk.

"But she's really sorry for forcing you to recount your traumatic past," tingala sa kaniya ni Kero na nakaupo pa rin sa swivel chair niya. "Can't you give her a chance to make it up to you? I think she accepts you for whatever your past is. Isn't that what you wanted from her? A love so unconditional, it embraces you after everything you went through?"

He gave Kero lifeless stare. "She doesn't need to make it up to me. Hindi na naman ako galit sa kan'ya." Then he looked away, embarrassed. "It's also not her fault anyway. Wala naman s'yang kamalay-malay sa pinagdaanan ko, kaya hindi n'ya talaga alam kung paano ako kakausapin tungkol doon."

"O, hindi ka na rin pala galit sa kan'ya at wala naman pala s'yang kasalanan, e! Bakit pinarurusahan mo s'ya nang gan'to?"

He narrowed his eyes at Kero. "Parusa?"

"Oo. Aba, hindi ba parusa 'yong ipagtabuyan ka ng taong mahal mo? Lalo na kapag gan'tong alam mong kailangan ka n'ya?"

Leo lowered his eyes and fell silent.

Nablangko siya.

Nothing particular was running in his mind. It refused to think, making him feel like an empty shell. He couldn't process everything that he just heard, making him buffer in front of his friends.

Juxe, who stood by the window behind the sofa wearing brown cargo shorts and a blue graphic shirt slid his eyeglasses higher on his nose bridge. "Look, she's not here to force you to move on, to heal you, or to save you, because you . . . only you can save yourself against your own fears, your own emotions, your own mind. Ang gusto lang n'ya ay samahan ka, damayan ka."

Claude spoke next. "Pakiusap, man. Para sa ikabubuti mo at kahit bilang konsiderasyon man lang sa babaeng sinasabi mong mahal mo talaga . . . Let Imee stay here with you. Let her comfort you. Let her be your emotional support. Bigyan mo naman s'ya ng pagkakataong damayan ka sa pinagdadaanan mo.

"Kaming mga kaibigan mo, mapapanatag kami kung sasamahan ka n'ya rito. Lalo na at wala pa ring kaalam-alam si Yaya Lumeng tungkol sa sitwasyon mo kaya hindi ka n'ya maintindihan at ma-assist nang maayos. I mean, we can't even tell her about this, not without your permission."

Leo sighed in surrender and faced Claude and Juxe. "It's too late for that. Umalis na si Imee mula nang itinaboy ko s'ya kanina."

"No. She's still here. Sinamahan muna s'ya ni Yaya Lumeng."

Leo could not explain the relief that made his chest feel lighter. "Mabuti naman. Baka abutin lang din s'ya ng alanganing oras sa pag-uwi kaya dito muna s'ya magpalipas ng gabi. Delikado ring bumiyahe s'ya nang mag-isa pabalik ng Batangas."

Nagliwanag nang bahagya ang mukha ng mga kaibigan niya.

"Pakibilin na lang 'yon kay Yaya Lumeng paglabas n'yo rito. I'm still not ready to face her tonight," dugtong niya bago itinuloy ang pagpulot sa natitirang mga folder sa sahig.

His friends left their positions to help him clean up the floor.

***

HINDI alam ni Imee kung paano, pero nakumbinsi raw nina Claude, Cherubim, at Juxe si Leo na hayaan siyang manatili muna sa townhouse kasama nito.

In the next few days, Leo rarely left his office room. Meaning, Imee never had any chance to talk to him. They only walked past each other, in silence, on the hallway every once in a while.

Leo remained cold to her but her presence seemed to give progress to his behavior. Ang sabi kasi ni Yaya Lumeng ay hindi na paputol-putol ang pagkain nito ng almusal, tanghalian, at hapunan mula nang nanatili siya sa townhouse. Nabawasan na rin ang pagbababad nito sa shower. Nabawasan na rin ang pagiging magagalitin nito at bigla-biglang pag-iyak.

Panay naman ang tawag ni Kero sa bahay para kumustahin si Leo at tanungin kung ano ang mga kailangan nila ni Yaya Lumeng sa bahay. At Leo's state, they just could not ask him for money to cover the expenses in the house, so for the meantime, Kero was providing them with financial support.

After answering Kero's call on her fifth night in Leo's house, Imee returned Yaya Lumeng's cell phone and climbed to the second floor.

Nagdalawang-isip si Imee pero sa huli ay tinalo siya ng pag-aalala para sa binata. Sinilip niya si Leo sa office room. Suwerte siya at hindi naka-lock ang pinto. Nasilayan niya ito sa wakas nang matagal-tagal.

Imee walked inside the office room as discreetly as she could, leaving the door open.

Nadatnan niyang tulog na si Leo sa sofa. Imee bent over to check him closely.

Kinakabahan siya sa sobrang bilis ng pagbagsak ng katawan nito kahit mukhang hindi pa naman nangangayayat. Idagdag pa roon ang pamumula ng mga braso nito na para bang kinuskos nang kinuskos nang matagal. He looked so calm in his sleep, yet she could still see traces of weariness on his face . . . on his closed, hooded eyes, and dry, downturned lips.

"Sorry, Leo." Matamlay ang kaniyang naging pag-ngiti. "Marahil, marami pa talaga akong dapat matutuhan." Malungkot na napayuko siya at nag-squat sa tabi ng sofa para magpantay kahit papaano ang kanilang mga mukha. "Sabi mo noon, 'I hope your innocence stays with you.' Pero kung ang kainosentehan na 'yon ang magpapa-ignorante sa 'kin, ayoko nang manatiling inosente. Gusto kong matutuhan kung pa'no ko man lang mapagagaan ang pakiramdam mo, kung pa'no kita matutulungan sa sitwasyon mo. Kung hindi mo kayang makamit ang hustisya, at hustisya lamang ang makahihilom sa 'yo . . . Ako, ako ang magkakamit ng hustisya para sa 'yo."

She kissed him on his temple. Then she could not hold her shuddering breath from slipping out of her lips. Imee shut her misting eyes to discourage her tears to flow.

"At gagawin ko 'yon kapag hiniling mo sa 'kin, dahil mahal na mahalkita."

***

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La Grilla Series #1
Copyright Registered: 2024
R-18, General Fiction, Sexy Romance, Drama

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