l o t u s 로 터 스

ᴍ ɪ ɴ  ʏ ᴏ ᴏ ɴ ɢ ɪ

𝐌𝐚𝐫𝐜𝐡 22𝐧𝐝

Drip. Drop. The sound of the rain slowly getting more intense as the time flew by. The drops landing on the metal bench and my black coat. The strongest earthy smell and the light breeze making me shiver. No one but me slouching over on that soaking bench looking blankly at the grey bricks forming a sidewalk with wet dirt in between. My elbows leaning on my knees with my hand wrapped around my fist. My brown hair slowly turning darker. My vision beginning to blur as the drops gather on my black rimmed glasses. Not caring at all that the rain began to soak through my clothes, that the rain began to pour.

At this point the rain started to sound like loud static, yet I don't mind it. It's peaceful really, like spending a peaceful morning looking at the world around you, but it was the opposite. It was a cold day during spring with no company and no bliss, just the constant pressure of four walls trapping me in my own mind.

I lift up my head slowly to see nothing but grey skies, dead trees, and puddles along the sidewalk. Droplets rolling down my chin and nose and falling to be soaked by my black denim jeans.

"fuck" was the only thing that came to my mind as I realized what I was doing. I was mourning over my own life when it hadn't even ended yet.

I started to hear wet footsteps in the distance just to see the only person I didn't need right now. I slipped a quick glance over at them before I continued my gaze back at the sidewalk. They sat down at the opposite end of the bench, waiting for the silence to be broken.

"The fuck you want."

"You know exactly why I'm here, Yoongi."

I didn't, but why not play along?

"Talk to me then."

The other man slipped something out of his trench coat pocket and only then did I finally end up looking at him. It was Taehyung, the man that helped me get into this melancholy state.

He pulled out a fully bloomed white lotus and held it out to me.

"The fuck is this?" I said as I gently took it from his hands.

"He sent it to me, I'm guessing he wanted you to have it." He said as he shoved his hands back into his pockets to maintain some kind of warmth.

I observed the flower intently as I cupped it with my two hands. The rain gliding down the petals.

He shouldn't be this forgiving.

ᴘ ᴀ ʀ ᴋ  ᴊ ɪ ᴍ ɪ ɴ

I stared blankly while sitting at the edge of my bed, fidgeting with my lighter and tapping my foot. My chest burning with pressure, my anxiety had flooded my entire body.

My suitcase was laying on the bed and everything in my bedroom had been cleaned out. Just a final knock on the door and its over.

I shot my head towards the door as the men finally knocked and shouted "Its time to go, kid!"

I gulped and dragged my suitcase off the bed and opened the door to see three men dressed in all white. I walked past them and carried my suitcase downstairs as they followed.

I saw my parents standing right by the front door, ready to say their last goodbye.

I dropped my suitcase and quickly walked towards them, one of the men decided to hold me back. "Just please! Let me say goodbye to them! Please!"

The man let go and I went in for a tight hug with my mother.

"Be careful and don't you dare leave me, Jimin! Promise you'll come back to me!"

I let out a sob and nodded before I hugged my father.

"I love you, son."

The men pushed me outside and into a black van with my suitcase. The men reassured me that it would be a 10 hour drive before shutting the door with blacked out windows.

Then my anxiety struck again.

After 5 hours I had fallen asleep and only had to wait a couple more hours. I spent that time just looking at my lap with dry tears on my face. The windows didn't display the view of the outside, the men in white didn't want me to know where I was.

The car suddenly came to a stop and the door opened.

"Come on, kid!"

I quickly got out and followed the men into a black building. The sunlight nowhere to be seen, just the sky covered in clouds ready to pour.

They showed me to a private restroom to change and I burst into tears right as they closed the door.

I'm doing this for him.

I thought to myself.

I looked at myself in the bathroom mirror with my hands leaning on the sink.  I looked away with my lips pressed together. Then I squeezed my eyes shut.

For Yoongi.

I opened my eyes and looked down at the sink as I held in my sob. I dropped to the ground with one hand muffling my sobs and the other pressed against the wall for stability.

-

I walked out dressed in a black uniform and was escorted to a room full of people. They were all wearing black to except for the guards that were wearing white, the people were in lines that lead to doorways with the word "disinfect" written at its entrance.

A guard slightly shoved me into one of the lines. I looked around at some of the people before I made eye contact with a boy with piercing black eyes.

He continued to stare with his cold gaze, then silently worded "death."

I eventually reached the front of the line and a woman in white approached me with a clipboard and pen in hand.

"What's your name?"

"Jimin."

"Full name?"

"Park Jimin."

She nodded and gestured for another lady to press a needle into my neck. I winced at the cold liquid that continued to travel under my skin. I felt a little nauseous at first but it quickly went away.

"Go to room 219, we will knock on your door tomorrow morning."

I nodded and she attached a sticker on my chest with the word "Patient" in big red block letters and my name right below in her handwriting.

I walked through a hallway and turned a couple corners before I found my door. A nice white door with a golden knob, it went well with white walls and white marble floor of the hallway.

I twisted the knob and pushed, a simple room came to view. I quickly entered and locked the door behind me and started observing. A bed in the middle, a desk on the left and a bathroom on the right, but everything was white, all white.

I saw a note on the desk and walked towards it.

Before you start our program we will give you a chance to send a letter, a gift, or anything of your choice to anyone of your choice.

Within reason of course.

We have left a piece of pen and paper for you to use if you so please. All you have to do is leave your package outside of your door and we will ship it out to the address you listed. We will ship it out before noon.

I looked up and spotted my suitcase beside the bed, I ran towards it and laid it on the bed. I zipped it open and ruffled through the clothes and found what I was looking for. A black box with a simple latch to keep it shut. I snapped it open and smiled with content as I saw the lotus that was still perfectly intact.

I walked over to the desk and put the box and lotus aside and went for the pen and paper. Just the address, the lotus says enough already.

I put it all together and unlocked my door, I got on my knees and carefully laid the box and paper outside my door.

"Soon."