I hate him. Every fiber in my body, every single cell, hates him to the end of time and back. That doesn't change the fact that despite everything I do I can't fully turn my back on him. I may not be speaking with Sasuke at the moment but our friendship is deeper than our current situation. He's like a brother to me and as an only child that means more than he realizes.

There are probably half a dozen reasons why I should do what Kiba and the others have chosen to do, ignore Sasuke, but I can't, I'd feel like a traitor. So I stew in my feelings, unable to share them with anyone, including Hinata. She has made it clear she doesn't approve of my unwillingness to leave Sasuke behind and it's tearing us apart.

I never thought my feelings would be as deep as they are, I can't imagine my life without her, yet all of my choices have hurt her. Maybe I don't love her as much as I think I do. If I did, I wouldn't be hurting her the way that I am. But these thoughts don't make me walk away, I'm too selfish to do that. It's never been my intention to hurt her, though somehow every decision I make does.

"Naruto...are you okay?"

Her voice is timid and quiet. Slowly it has been reverting back to the tone she used to speak to me in before I had realized she was in love with me. This change is my fault and it kills me that I have caused this.

I glance across the table at her, my heart cracking at the expression on her face. She's worried about me and trying to hide it. It warms my heart that she cares so deeply so I give her the best smile I can, though I'm sure it won't reach my eyes. "Feeling better than ever." I lie, wishing it were the truth.

Her rueful smile confirms my fear, the smile didn't reach my eyes. "If you want to talk.."

I don't let her finish as it only takes those five words to ignite unwanted irritation within me. I do want to talk but it's her who doesn't want to listen or rather refuses to listen. I can't really blame her though, Sakura and Kiba are both close friends of hers, and Sasuke's behavior has affected both of them. "Really, I'm okay." I force, my tone more annoyed than I had intended.

Hinata sighs and looks away, her eyes misting as she attempts to hide the tears about to fall. The sight tears me up inside and even though I am the one to blame for these tears I still place the blame on Sasuke. He's the one that has been acting stupid, he's the one responsible for my attitude, he's the reason I can't just let it go, he's the reason Hinata's heart is breaking.

I let out a sigh of my own. "I don't know what to do Hinata. He's like a brother to me." I admit finally, wanting everything out there but terrified that the results are not going to be pretty.

Hinata looks at me her eyes wide in shock that I am finally taking her up on her continuous offer of talking. I let my head fall back and stare at the ceiling trying to think up a way that I can explain this situation without upsetting her. "It's like, I know Sasuke doesn't do anything without a reason. And it doesn't make sense that he would try and win Sakura back simply because he likes her again. He's a suffer in silence type of person. Something else is going on..."

There is a long pause before Hinata speaks, "And you are determined to find out what that is?"

I can tell Hinata isn't okay with me wanting to stick by Sasuke and it brings a new wave of sadness. I feel as though she is unknowingly making me choose, her or Sasuke. I chuckle at the bitter irony. "I bet this is how Sakura felt when I was being childish about her and Kiba's relationship. Wanting to be in two places at once and unable to make the people important to me happy."

Hinata says nothing causing me to look up and see the look of realization on her face. "Naruto I..I didn't mean to..." She mumbles, her tears finally escaping down her cheeks.

I shrug and offer a smile, one that I know reaches my eyes this time. "I know."

The sudden urge to hold her overwhelms me and before I know it I am out of my seat and pulling her up out of her's and into my arms. I half expect her to pull away considering the dick I have been the last couple months, but she doesn't. I want to tell her that things will be different, that they will be better, and that I will fix this thing with Sasuke so that things can go back to the way they were, but I can't. Because deep down I'm not sure that I can be held to those words, and I don't want to disappoint her more than I already have.