Shuichi: I love you, and I love you more and more every second... y-you are absolutely p-perfect...
Kokichi: Actually I'm Kokichi

~~~

Kokichi: So... I have a chronic condition called boredom. How do I treat this?
Shuichi: The doctor recommends a dosage of memes and lots of music

~~~

Kokichi: I found something out
Shuichi: What is it?
Kokichi: Autumn makes a part of me horny

~~~

Kokichi: SHUICHI!!! I HAVE A VERY IMPORTANT QUESTION IT'S A LIFE OR DEATH MATTER!
Shuichi: What?! What is it?!
Kokichi: HAVE YOU EVER MASTURBATED TO ANYTHING NAGITO RELATED?!
Shuichi: ...Seriously? No.

~~~

Kokichi: *Sees chapter titled 'sleep is for the weak'* DAD I'M WEAK

~~~

Kokichi: If you die I'm fucking your dead body Shuichi. So I think it's best if you don't die.
Shuichi: Wait excuse me what

~~~

Kokichi: Sometimes my dad treats me like a little kid and I'm like... hhhhhh... I'mnotthree-
Shuichi: I know you aren't... you're two

~~~

Shuichi: *Concerned noises*
Kokichi: Be concerned
Shuichi: I am
Kokichi: Good! Now put your concerns in the box. They will be redirected to the furnace.

~~~

Shuichi: *Casually recording TikToks*
Kokichi: TikTok is cancer-
Shuichi: Haha
Kokichi: So much cancer I could almost die from a giant crab
Shuichi: I- What if I used FNAF audio and made a cursed video
Kokichi: N o
Shuichi: Haha, yes
Kokichi: Haha, if you want me to blow my head off
Shuichi: Oh... *Still makes cursed TikTok*
Kokichi: *Shoots self*
Shuichi: I- no, I didn't make the TikTok! ...Yet...
Kokichi: Gives me time to find the real gun!
Shuichi: NO!!!

~~~

Shuichi: I'm a bitch that must die
Kokichi: I was thinking the same thing, Shuichi!

~~~

Shuichi: I don't like mustard
Kokichi: WH-?! ...This is why we got a divorce and we weren't even married

~~~
Word count: 298