"I'm calling the police."

I sigh, rubbing an exasperated hand over my face. On the other line of the phone Anna is fuming and basically making threats all around. That's what I get for avoiding her calls for three weeks straight I suppose.

"Annalisa, please."

"Don't use my full name on me, Mariana. What the hell kind of shit did I come back to?"

I met Anna back in med school. I was in my graduating year and she was about halfway through. I saw her around campus a few times and instantly knew. People, our people, have an air about us only we can recognize. It's in the little things. Glancing around at all times, up and leaving with no explanation, refusing to talk about their parents. I sat down next to her uninvited even though she was leaned against a tree and wearing a deliberate face of "don't fuck with me." She was closed off from the start and basically spat fire but I didn't care. I could see the pain in her eyes even then.

I'd come to learn she was also New York mafia, as I'd suspected. The difference was her parents were assholes who disowned her when she tried to run away with the love of her life at the time. It was because of her father's command that a soldier shot her fiancée to death and Anna found herself alone and on the streets. She did what she had to do to survive, including being a full-time stripper to put herself through med school and crawl out of the hole she was dumped in. I've never met anyone more resilient and cold, but also full of so many feelings if only people stuck around to learn them.

I consider her a good friend and probably the closest friend I have but our different worlds make it difficult to constantly stay in touch. For one, those disowned by their people are not invited into other familias. Father is an understanding man but my friendship with Anna is one even he could not allow. Anna understands that and often keeps her distance because she doesn't want me to lose everything like she did. She's also in her final year of med school now and wants to graduate loan-free. That means she's been travelling with her sleazy boss to strip-shows he puts on in different states. She's been gone a month, stripping through night and studying through day, and I've managed to lie to her about everything in my life so far.

But she came back this morning and when she wouldn't stop blowing up my phone, I knew I had to answer. I also sang like a freaking canary because Anna has the annoying ability to make people admit the things they don't want to admit. She's a freaking ice queen and possibly the scariest bitch I know. It's probably why I feel so safe around her.

"Io lo ammazzo," she hisses.

I raise a brow at her intense statement. "He's Capo and basically a murderer. You can't kill him."

"I'll fucking try it. And your dad. How could he give you up like that? You told me he was different."

"I told you, he didn't have a choice. I didn't believe it at first either but I've been married almost a month and it's starting to make sense in its own twisted way."

"You got fucking married and didn't even think to tell me. Forget him, I'll kill you."

"Anna," I sigh. "I didn't want to dump this on you. You were already travelling and I know..."

I trail off, unsure of what to say. Annalisa doesn't tell me much beyond the fact that she strips. But I know her abroad trips are different and I can use common sense to guess what those trips entail. Of course she won't tell me and I'd never ask her to but I know. I know she hates it and has no choice and it breaks a piece of her every time. I've lent her money so she wouldn't have to do this but she insists its no use because she can't deny her boss's orders or she'd be fired. Whether I give her money or not, she has to go through that crap.

"It would have been good to know," she abruptly changes the subject in a strained voice. "Just because my life is shit doesn't mean you can't share your pain with me."

I can hear how defensive she sounds. Anna has walls around her I can't even begin to imagine breaking so I quickly backtrack. "I know. I'm sorry I lied. I'm managing, if that's any consolation."

"It is. He better not have put his hands on you. Tell me you're staying as far away from him as you can."

My cheeks grow hot with embarrassment. For the millionth time since it happened, flashes of last night come to me and I want to groan from humiliation at the reminder.

Why did I let it happen? Why did I tell Knox he could fucking spank me as his twisted punishment for something that wasn't even my fault? And what's worse is I'm the one who goaded him into it first. I'm the one who couldn't hold back my moans for the life of me because I actually enjoyed it. I hate admitting it to myself but it's true.

I didn't think I would like it as much as I did. Every time his calloused palm came down on me, it sent an unexplainable jolt of electricity up my spine. It hurt and I flinched from each strike but I wanted more. The pain only intensified the pleasure in a way I didn't expect or have ever experienced.

The only consolation I have is that he enjoyed doing it to me just as much. I felt him against me, hard and big, pushing his hips into me and not even realizing he was doing it. I felt it in his heavy pants that skated over my ear as he leaned on top of me, his breaths picking up in response to my every moan. Did he even notice the soft growls that left his mouth each time I arched into him? His intense response to me was partly why I wanted his punishment so bad. The act itself was satisfying, but knowing that he wanted me was even better.

He acted so indifferent to me all the time but last night there was no doubt about his desire for me. It was kind of thrilling and did one hell of a number on my ego that's been bruised and battered from weeks of him ignoring me and treating me the way he has.

"Maria." Anna's sharp call of my name snaps me out of it. I shift in my seat guilty. I still can't quite sit without feeling a touch of soreness. That's probably why I keep thinking about what happened. "Did he touch you? Do I have to cut his dick off?"

I push my food around my plate with a fork, my appetite giving up on me. "The answer to everything isn't violence, Anna."

"Tell that to every man that ever got his way using it."

"Point made. But you'd only get yourself into more trouble."

"I am trouble. Stop trying to avoid my question. Did something happen?"

"No," I lie.

I'm not ready to admit last night to myself, never mind share it with Anna. She'd also probably tell me how stupid I was to let that happen and while I know it's true, I don't want to take it back. Some small and twisted part of me would even let it happen again.

I hear keys followed by the unmistakable sound of the front door opening. Teresa already went home for the night so I know it's Knox. Shit. I'm usually upstairs in my room when he gets home but I lost track of time talking to Anna.

"Hey, I got to go," I tell her quickly.

"You better not ghost me again or I'll track you down myself. I mean it, Maria."

"I know," I groan because that's completely something she would do. Knox enters the kitchen then and pauses when he sees me. I hate that my heart starts beating erratically from his presence alone. I break our intense stare and mumble into the phone, "Talk soon, babe."

I hang up and pretend I'm eating my food. If I just got up and left that would be weird and oddly suspicious for no reason so I'll kill another minute.

I chew on a piece of chicken and ignore Knox as he walks the rest of the way in and starts going through some pantries. I'm mentally counting the seconds in my head until I can get up and take off when he speaks, his deep voice startling me.

"Who were you speaking to?"

"Hypocritical much?" I mutter under my breath, feeling a odd sense of déjà vu.

Then all of a sudden, without warning, I feel his chest brush my back and tense up again. Why the hell is he standing so close? He's usually more than eager to stay a hundred feet away from me.

"I won't ask again," he warns, voice hard.

My fingers tighten around my fork when I feel his hand take hold of my hair and sweep it over to one side. I'm instantly exposed to the way his breath lightly fans over the back of my neck. My skin erupts into goosebumps. It feels just like it did last night, when he was leaned over me and slapping my ass like his life depended on it. His harsh breaths had sent shivers down my back just like they do now. One little move and he managed to take me back to last night, the bastard.

"It was my friend." I manage a steady voice that impresses even me.

"Hmm." I can almost feel his hum run down my spine like a physical touch. "Since when do you have friends?"

I look over my shoulder with narrowed eyes, meeting his almost-black ones. "I have friends, you ass."

He raises a brow at my haughty tone. "You referred to them as 'babe'."

"I like using terms of endearment for people I love."

"Of course you do."

"Of course you don't."

I hop off the stool and shoulder past him, scraping off the leftovers on my plate into a bin and washing it. While I scrub I debate saying what's been on my mind since talking to Anna. Before she bombarded me with questions she caught me up on what's been happening at the hospital. It was good to hear that my coworkers missed me and that they were hoping I'd be back soon. I still haven't formally quit and I doubt my boss will hold on to my position any longer but I'm not ready to give up my job yet. Not ready to give it up at all.

When I shut off the tap and the room goes quiet again, I clear my throat and turn around. Knox has his tablet opened in front of him and is going through it, leaning against the counter. I know he knows I'm looking at him expectantly but ignores me.

"Knox," I start lightly, hoping he'll look up at me. He doesn't. I push down my rising frustrating and try again. "Knox."

His finger pauses from scrolling and he side-glances me with hard eyes. "Stop saying my fucking name. I hear you."

"Then answer," I throw back. Good to know last night made no difference between us. I can't believe for a moment I considered that he defended me because he cared, if even a little. Staying locked up in this house has made me stupid beyond belief which is all the more reason I push the words out. "I want to go back to work."

He doesn't miss a beat. "Not happening."

Still? At first I thought he was doing this to be petty about our marriage but it's been almost a month. I thought he might have a slight change of heart. I feel my heart plummet to my gut with disappointment and anger.

"Why the hell not? Haven't I proved that you can trust me? What's the problem?"

"It wasn't your business the first time you asked and it won't be your business the fucking fifth time you ask. Get over it."

"You're unbelievable!" I explode. I was hoping to have a calm and adult conversation about this but fuck that. He's being a damn child. "I'm going to lose my job for good if I don't go back!"

His eyes finally snap to mine. I realize my mistake a moment too late and back up when he drops his tablet with a noisy clatter, slowly advancing toward me. "You didn't quit? You disobeyed my orders?"

An incredulous laugh bursts out of me. "I'm not a dog. You don't get to order me around and expect me to play fetch."

I'm not doing myself any favours. My ribcage flutters with a hint of fear when his nostrils flare, face setting like stone. "This isn't the time for you to act like a spoiled brat. I warned you what would happen if you didn't listen to me. Do you suddenly not care if I put a bullet through your father and sister?"

I swear time stops when those words leave his mouth. "You wouldn't."

"You don't know me well enough to take that bet."

God, he's serious. I can see it in the way he's glaring down at me. My throat goes tight, making it hard to breathe, and I push him back for some breathing space. "Fuck you. I haven't done anything for you to treat me this way. I stay at home all the time, miserable, but I listen to you nonetheless. Doesn't that count for anything?"

He eyes me then and for a moment it looks like he's actually considering my words. The tiniest morsel of hope flares up in me until he grabs my phone from behind me and holds it up to my face.

"Quit," he orders. "Now. This is the last time I let you get away without consequences."

"And if I don't?" I ask, just because I'm desperate. I thought for sure that I would figure out a way to hold on to my job but it's all falling apart so fast.

His jaw clenches. "Then you'll realize how easy I've been on you. I could be so much fucking worse and that's not a side of me you want to see. I don't care to protect you from it either."

The phone is held between us like a death sentence. I know that in a moment I have to let go of the one thing I always had going for me, something that made me feel independent and something I worked so hard for. Years of exams and studying and trying not to let my father down, who blessed me with the opportunity to go to college in the first place. That doesn't happen to so many girls in this life. I know how lucky I am. And yet, I stand here, and it's all about to be taken away because my freaking husband said so.

"Last. Chance." The words are gritted, menacing, and he impatiently jerks the phone.

I keep my eyes on his despite the tears blurring my vision and snatch the phone from his hand. I only glance down to find my boss's number in my contacts and call him but then I look at Knox again, staring him dead in the eye.

I want him to see how much he's hurting me. He says he doesn't feel anything but I sure as hell want him to feel my pain. Maybe that'll thaw him a little and make him more human than monster.

"Maria!" My boss answers my call excitedly and my heart stutters painfully. Knox tilts his head, listening in. "I hope you calling means you're ready to come back. This place hasn't been the same without you, kid."

I think I almost hear the crack in my chest. My boss is a great man and he's always made me feel welcome and appreciated. I think it's just hitting me that I don't know if I'm going to see him again, not with the way Knox has me on a leash.

"Hey, Liam," I greet. My voice shakes but I hope he doesn't notice. "I'm sorry my leave went on for so long. I...unfortunately, I have bad news."

"Oh." He sounds a lot more somber. "Is it real bad? Anything I can do for you?"

I try to say the words but they're stuck to the roof of my mouth, denial refusing to let them go. I know I'm pleading Knox with my eyes. One last chance, even if it means having to beg. He holds my stare and shakes his head no with resolution. I can't persuade him.

I have to look away then. No matter how badly I want to be strong and stare him down while I do this, I can't. I'm crumbling and if I keep looking at him, I'll shatter.

"I quit," I say bluntly. Rip it off like a band-aid but it's so much more painful than that. So much more. "I had to go away for a family emergency and I realized my family is more important than my job. I just need to be with them. I'm sorry if this causes any issues."

The silence stretches on for so long I have to pull back the phone and check the screen to see if the call is still running. I bring it back to my ear and wait.

"This is...a shock." And Liam sounds like it too. "I respect your boundaries but you love your job, Maria. You've always been the first one to clock in and the last one to clock out. Are you sure this is what you want?"

No, I want to scream. Instead I nod curtly then realize he can't see it so I croak out a, "Yes. I'm sure. I'm really sorry once again."

"Well...okay." He sounds floored and I can't blame him. I can hardly believe this is happening myself. "I'll have to hire someone in your position effective immediately. I can't promise to offer you another job in the future if you change your mind. Okay?"

And just like that he's on his way to replace me. Just like that I've had something else taken away from me. I swallow down the boulder in my throat so I can speak.

"Okay. Thanks for understanding."

"Sure, kid. Stay in touch, okay?"

I doubt it. But I whisper a small "okay" because what the hell else can I say?

I end the call after saying goodbye, wiping the lone tear that managed to escape before facing Knox. His expression has yet to budge. It's as stoic and unfeeling as it was a few minutes ago.

"Happy?" I snip. He says nothing. "If it's all the same to you, I'm going to crawl back to my dungeon and chain myself to the bed. Hope that pleases you, master."

I'm really not amusing him. There's a slight pulse in his jaw from the way he grinds his teeth but that's all I get. No apologies. No regret. Emptiness, like he warned me. He really does feel nothing and I should have believed him.I had no business giving him the benefit of the doubt when he hasn't done a damn thing to earn it.

I leave him standing there in the kitchen while I haul ass upstairs, wiping my tears furiously. I've cried over the bastard more times than I can count and I'm done. I'm so fucking done.

Just as I close the door to my room I get a call. The stupid girl in me briefly thinks it's Knox, who might be calling to apologize, but then I realize I don't even have my husband's number. What the hell am I doing thinking of this as a real marriage? No wonder he keeps reminding me that it's fake. I keep missing the freaking memo.

The caller ID tells me it's my dad. I can't help but glare at the screen. I'd just started warming up to the idea of talking to him but right now all I can think is that I'm in this position because of him. It's his fault I'm stuck in this cage of a marriage.

"Principessa?" I'm guessing the shock in his voice is because I actually picked up. "Oh, vita mia, how are you?"

"Bring me home." I don't intend for the words to come out but they do. In a low and tortured voice thick with emotion. "If you love me at all you'll come here right now and take me home."

Silence. It hurts more than I thought it would.

"I can't do this anymore."I clutch my chest, feeling it pulse with pain. "I'm begging you. Please come get me. You must have some sort of power here."

"Mariana." That's all he says. My name, in a defeated sigh that tells me more than any excuse I know he's about to give me. My gut sinks with disappointment and the taste of betrayal sits heavily on my tongue. "My hands are tied. Please try to understand—"

"Go to hell," I whisper and end the call. I can't handle another conversation of him telling me all the ways he wishes he could help me only to not lift a single finger.

My back hits the door and I slide down until I'm sitting, bringing my knees up to my chin and burying my face in my arms. I think this hurts so much because for a moment I let my guard down, maybe even believed that things could be different in this marriage one day. I'm so, so stupid.

This isn't real, Knox always tells me. And I know it's not. I don't want it to be. But I don't want it to be so painful either.

_____________________________

A/N

PFFT. I just know I pissed y'all off with the way Knox switched up from the last chapter. It's okay besties even I got super heated writing this. We all know Mariana deserves better at this point (okay but also let's not be SO aggressive in the comments about it I have feelings lmao).

FOR YOUR OWN CONSCIENCE, know that I didn't write this for the sake of making my male lead an ass for no reason. Every detail in this story ultimately has purpose. Be patient and I promise, Knox is gonna make up for this.

Also, Annalisa was finally introduced! Your thoughts and first impressions?

Please VOTE, comment and share if you liked this chapter!

Happy Reading :)