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~ Carson's POV ~

"You've already got trouble in paradise?"

As soon as Dani left with Aviana, Fox was already making his stupid jokes but I was too concerned about my girlfriend to take any notice of him.

I tried not to look at her after Chloe kissed me, I didn't want to see the look on her face. I know I screwed up the moment I didn't push Chloe away and instead put my hands on her waist, but it was only because I would have fallen back into Daniela which would have hurt her.

I went into shock the moment I realised I'd done what I was so afraid of doing. I told her that night one of the biggest reasons I'd never had a girlfriend was because of my lifestyle and my job, but that wasn't the only one.

The moment my thoughts went back to that stupid kiss, I turned my head to see Chloe still standing there. I was just itching to grab one of the many guns hidden in that room and shoot her with it.

"Why the hell are you still here?"

"Can we talk? Carson I love you and-"

"And you know now that he has a girlfriend so get the hell out, we have almost five weeks of drinking to catch up on." When she heard Grey's cold tone she finally got the hint and left the room closing the door behind herself.

Letting out a frustrated sigh I dropped down on the couch while Grey and Fox came and sat down too bringing two bottles of scotch with them. Once they'd finally poured three glasses, we each took one and I savoured every sip of it before I refilled my glass.

I wanted to down that one too but I thought it was better to pace myself, especially with all the thoughts about the kiss going through my head at that moment.

"So you want to tell us what happened?"

At least they waited for me to finish my first drink before they asked.

"I was kidnapped, I escaped and now I'm here, the end." I mumbled the words before I took a sip of my drink, watching when Grey leaned closer to Fox just for show since he said his words loud enough for me to hear.

"He's in a bad mood."

"It's probably a lack of sex, he seems tense." I lowered my glass, narrowing my eyes at Fox when he smirked at me.

"Or maybe it's his masculinity being threatened, did you hear how his girlfriend put him in his place?"

"He became a pussy the moment he got a girlfriend."

"Are you two done?" When I finally reacted, they both burst into laughter while I just sat there patiently waiting for them to shut the hell up before I finally told them the story.

I really wasn't in the mood and they were just making it worse.

"George had his men trap me on some street in Manhattan then they ambushed me and my guards never showed up."

"They were all dead Carson. When we found out what happened we found them a street away, both cars were totalled."

I nodded my head in response to Grey, letting out a sigh. That's exactly what I thought had happened, like I told Dani once, if you're given a job in the mafia you do it. My guards were also the best of the best so the only reason they would have screwed it up is if they were dead.

"Anyway, he drugged us for four days and we woke up-"

"Who's us?" This time it was Fox who looked confused making me realise I'd forgotten my favourite part of the story. "Oh, Daniela. She saw me trying to fight off George's men and she thought she could help. But they just took her too."

She was so cute.

She didn't deserve what I just did to her. She didn't deserve to see it.

Both of them cracked a smile at that before I continued with the story.

"So they locked us in this tiny room, George said he wanted revenge, which you know is because I put Christopher in a coma."

"Oh yeah I heard he's out. When you told Grey on the phone the other day that it was George, we did some digging and apparently the fool woke up six months ago."

I nodded my head at that, remembering that the only time Christopher made an appearance was when he held that poker game and assaulted Dani. She didn't tell me exactly what they did but I knew, it was so obvious.

"I know. So we spent three weeks in that room and then when George figured out that Ayden was Dani's boyfriend, he was going to make a video of him hurting her to send it to him for ransom. She went off and started crying and panicking when she realised he was going to hurt her again. While she was struggling she pushed him and he hit his head and died."

Both of them fell silent for a moment before Fox frowned at me, putting his glass down on the table.

"What do you mean again?" Shifting my gaze down to the liquor in my glass, I tried my best not to think back to the day when I was tired to the chair and I had to sit there and watch them hurt her.

"George asked her if she wanted to leave the room and become his whore, she said no and then..." Letting out a breath, I cleared my throat trying to force the images of her crying after Christopher and Mark assaulted her out of my head. If they hadn't assaulted her, George never would have beaten her up. In the end she only got hurt twice, nothing was her fault.

"I don't think she'd want me to tell you yet."

I could tell they were both confused and concerned about what happened especially after my reaction, but they didn't push it.

It felt like all that happened months ago, even though it was only weeks ago. For me it was so easy to push those memories to the back of my head, if I didn't they would haunt me every freaking day. But I didn't forget, I'd never forget.

After all that we'd been through together I just wanted to protect her and never let anything like that happen to her again. Those few days she was hurt by Christopher, Mark and George made me  sick.

Then I found out Ayden had been doing it to her for two whole freaking years.

"Carson." When I heard my name, I lifted my head to see both Grey and Fox watching me with concerned expressions making me realise I'd zoned out. "Sorry."

Throwing the last of my drink back, I put my glass down and filled it up for a third time, deciding to hurry up and finish the story.

"After George died we escaped, it was around then that she found about the mafia. She didn't know Ayden was in the Irish Mob either."

"She didn't? But she went to those the events with him." I nodded my head at that, letting out a humourless laugh. "That's what I said to her. It turns out, he did a very good job at keeping everything from her."

A day wouldn't go by that I wouldn't feel like crap for assuming she knew everything and taking my anger out on her. She didn't deserve any of that.

She didn't deserve what happened today either.

"How can we trust that she's not going to double cross us?"

"She has her own story and her own past Grey. It's her story to tell you when she's ready but I trust her. I know she won't do it."

He held my stare for a moment before he eventually nodded his head.

"So then what happened?" I was grateful when he changed the conversation, steering it away from Dani and back to the story.

"We walked for two days I think, maybe more I can't really remember properly. We found a cabin in the woods that some guy had as his escape plan - there were passports, money, burner phones. After that we stayed over night in some random places before we finally made it to Portland when I called you. Then we went to LA for three days and then drove back here."

Both of them listened intently to my simplified version of the story before Fox shook his head at me, for some reason not happy with how I told it.

"That's not fair, you're missing out all the juicy details."

"What details?"

"When did you fall in love? When did you kiss her for the first time? Did you have sex? Was it good?" When he wiggled his eyebrows at me I let out a chuckle while Grey just smiled.

"I'm not telling you that. You can ask Dani if you want, but I'm not telling you."

"Oh come on, did you see her? She's too shy, she's not going to tell me the gossip."

This time I rolled my eyes, as I finished my drink deciding to take a break before I had my fourth.

"I want Christopher found, along with everyone that worked with George. We need to find him before he comes after us to avenge his brother's death."

Both of them nodded in agreement although I'm sure they'd already been looking into it once they found out it was George who took me. If they'd found something they would have told me by now so there was no point in asking them straight.

"How has everything been here?"

"Up and down. It took us a while to find our feet after you disappeared. Aviana wouldn't stop crying and screaming at people to keep looking for you, Fox beat the crap out of anyone who irked him and I...I just freaking panicked."

"Panicked? Why?" When I gave him a frown Grey let out a sigh, lowering his gaze to the glass in his hand. "You're the boss, I'm your underboss that's how it's always been. I've never wanted your job and I didn't want it when I thought you were dead, but I didn't want to let you down either."

"If it ever happens again-"

"Carson don't say that." When Fox cut me off I shook my head at him, continuing with my sentence. "If it ever happens again, promise me you won't take a job that you don't want. I don't give a damn about you letting me down, I care about you. I'd never want you to do something you didn't want to do."

"Carson..."

"Promise me Grey. If you want it then take it but otherwise, find someone who you trust to take over."

Grey clenched his jaw as he sat there almost glaring at me since I knew he didn't like the topic of conversation, but eventually he nodded his head.

"I promise."

It fell quiet again between us before Grey and Fox eventually started updating me on some of the business deals that we working on before I disappeared, and what happened while I was gone.

"The biggest news is McKnight. People started to hear you'd gone missing, so the Irish tried to take the opportunity to screw us over as much as possible."

"Tried?" When I rose an eyebrow at Grey, he sent me a smirk in response as he lifted his glass to his lips. "I said I panicked and that I didn't want your job, I never said I wasn't good at it."

"You should watch your back Carson, if he gets bored as your underboss he might come for your job."

Nodding my head in response to Fox's words I let out a laugh, thinking back to our fight a little while ago.

"Try it and I'll knock you out and then him too." When I gestured over to Fox, he gave me an incredulous look.

"What the hell? Why me? It's Grey who would be coming after your job." At this I gave him an amused smile, shrugging my shoulders. "I know but it's fun when I get to beat you in a fight."

"You cheat that's why."

"I don't cheat, you just forget to wear a cup." When I mentioned  that time I kicked him in the balls he instantly glared at me, clearly not appreciating the reminder. "Screw you."

Grey and I laughed at his response before I turned my attention back to Grey, remembering that dinner meeting that went to shit before I was kidnapped.

"How's things with your daughter?"

When I mentioned his two year old daughter, his grip on his glass visibly tightened and he clenched his jaw.

"Maria is still being difficult, she won't let me see her."

"Still? It's been five weeks and she's still playing the same game?" Nodding his head, Grey took a gulp of his drink before he put the glass down. "We broke up three months ago and she's still not over it. I just want to see my baby and she's..."

"It was her fault, the whore cheated on you." The moment Fox said that word, Grey instantly turned to look at him giving him a glare. "Don't call her that. I pushed her away, I was never there for her."

"You were working Grey, you didn't stop loving her. If she had a problem with it she should have ended it with you instead of-"

When I noticed the frown on Grey's face deepen and the way he was clenching his fists I quickly spoke up, sending the idiot a glare of my own.

"Fox, shut up."

"It's true Carson. I have to watch my best friend go through so much pain just because of her." Fox placed his hand on Grey's back, causing him to look at him, his frown instantly softening when he saw the care in Fox's eyes.

"I thought I was your bestfriend." When I spoke up attempting to lighten the mood, they both looked at me. "But fine, I'll just be the third freaking wheel."

As I lifted my glass to my mouth, they both cracked a smile at my words. Before any of us could say another word, the door to the room opened again revealing Dani and Aviana...holding hands?

When I gave her a weird look, Aviana's steps slowed before she glanced down at her hand which was gripping Dani's.

"Oh, sorry." She instantly let go, allowing Dani to come over to where I was sitting on the couch, sitting down next to me although she made sure to put a good amount of distance between us.

She was hurt by what I did.

"Are you okay?" Although I said the words quietly to her, it was Aviana who responded to me in an offended tone.

"Why wouldn't she be okay?" Turning my head in her direction, I sent her a glare before I turned back to Dani who had a small smile on her face, but it was directed towards Aviana, not me.

"I'm fine Carson." I studied her for a moment before I eventually nodded my head, while she continued to stare back at me and then shuffled a tiny bit closer to me on the couch.

"Your face is bruising really badly already." Her words came out quietly as she analysed my face from where she was sitting. "I'm fine."

"No you're not, you're hurt. You need to put some ice on it."

"I don't need ice." When I shook my head, she gave me one of her looks which always had me backing down straight away.

Maybe I was turning into a pussy.

"Where do you keep the ice?"

"I'll get it for you." When Aviana happily stood up before I could protest again, she sent me a smirk before she went over to the bar to get the ice.

It only took her a moment to return, handing Dani the ice which she gently pressed against my cheek. I knew she was upset with me, and yet she still managed to find in her to be so caring.

Rolling my eyes, I took the ice from her hand holding it to my cheek while she shuffled away from me again.

"Do you want a drink?"

At first her eyes landed on my glass and then at the bottle of scotch on the table before she shook her her, scrunching her nose up.

"I'm okay, thank you."

"If you don't like scotch I can get you something else? What do you usually drink?"

Almost instantly I could see the panic in her eyes when Aviana offered to get her something else. I know she told me that she wanted to try alcohol but I also knew she wasn't going to do it in front of three strangers. But she was also too shy to tell them that she didn't drink, that much was clear.

"Just get her a bottle of water." When the attention was finally taken away from her and Aviana went to get some water, Dani sent me a discreet, grateful look.

She mumbled a 'thank you' when Aviana handed her the water before she eventually went to sit next to Grey.

"What did you talk about on your walk?" Even though I once again aimed my question at Dani trying to break this awkward tension between us, Aviana spoke again.

She was really starting to irritate me and I'd only been back for five minutes.

"I don't think that's any of your business." Letting out a sigh, I turned my head to glare at her again. "You came back holding my girlfriend's hand, of course it is."

"Oh Carson, I told you I'm not into girls, I can't kiss them, they ruin my make up. You don't need to feel threatened."

Her words caused both Grey and Fox to laugh while I just narrowed my eyes at her, until I heard Dani let out a quiet laugh next to me.

Of course it was only because of Aviana again.

"Screw you." My response only made her smirk widen but before she could respond, Fox suddenly spoke up.

"Oh, Carson! Your mom is back. Sorry I was supposed to tell you but I forgot." He casually shrugged his shoulders as if it wasn't a big deal before he picked up the PlayStation controller that he was holding when Dani and I first came into the room.

"What do you mean you forgot? That's important."

"I know but then you kissed Chloe and had a fight with Grey, it got too exciting. You should call her though, she's not very happy with your attitude." Even though he was now paying more attention to the TV, I continued to glare at him. "I didn't kiss Chloe, she kissed me and you should have freaking told me. What does she know?"

When Fox didn't bother replying to me, Aviana responded for him, giving me a reassuring look.

"Nothing Carson. When we found out you were okay, we waited until she asked about you and then we told her you were away on business."

All I could do was shake my head in irritation, taking out my phone to call her. I know I should have called her as soon as I got my phone, but I just kept putting it off. I don't know why, I just kind of did it. I didn't see the point in calling her if I couldn't tell her the truth, which I was never going to do over the phone.

Apart from the sounds of the video games Fox was playing, the room was silent while I dialled her number and then waited for her to answer.

"Hello?" When I heard my sister's voice on the phone I double checked to make sure it was my mom I had called before I let out a sigh knowing my little sister would just make this so much harder.

"Poppy give the phone to mom."

"No."

"No?" When I spoke in a confused tone, trying to hide my irritation she continued.

"No. You're a bitch and you can shove your phone up your-"

Before she could finish her sentence and anger me even more, I interrupted her.

"Poppy, just give her the damn phone."

"Where have you been Carson? We've all been trying to call you for weeks! You know, mom got so upset that you were ignoring her that we cut our trip short and came home to see you, only for Fox to tell us that you were in Guadeloupe! I don't even know where that is."

Neither do I.

"Look, Poppy I'll explain everything to you when I see you but can you just-"

"Shut up, one second." I let out a frustrated sigh, when she started having a conversation in the background. During that time I took the opportunity to pour another glass of scotch now that I really needed it.

"Mom says she doesn't want to talk to you right now, but she's coming to see you tomorrow at your penthouse at 3pm. If you're not there she's given me permission to kick your ass."

Shaking my head at her words, I just mumbled an 'okay' before I hung up the phone, throwing it on to the coffee table. Everyone, very smartly, stayed quiet while I finished my fourth glass of alcohol, trying my best to keep my temper under control.

But it was getting harder and harder the more I thought about that conversation and everything that had happened since I got back less than an hour ago.

That kiss just kept repeating in my mind and soon I felt myself spiralling all over again, with the sudden urge to hit something or someone.

~ Daniela's POV ~

I know it was a bad time to bring it up, but the moment he went to pour another drink I couldn't stop myself. He was supposed to be driving us back to Manhattan tonight, like he promised. All I wanted was to go home.

"Carson?" When I spoke in a tentative tone, his movements froze before he turned his head to look at me. "How many have you had?"

"What?" The coldness in his tone should have been the thing that shut me up, but of course it didn't.

"Drinks. How many drinks have you had?"

He held my stare for a moment, before he turned his attention back to the liquor he was now pouring into his glass. Without a word he picked the glass up, downing the contents in one go.

Flinching at the sound of him slamming the glass down onto the table, I watched as he stood to his feet, gesturing for me to get up too.

"Where are you going?" Grey was the only one who had the courage to question him in that moment, which I was grateful for since I also wanted to know the answer.

"Upstairs, I'll see you in the morning." He didn't bother to say another word to anyone as I followed quietly behind him, struggling to keep up with his pace.

It was only when we were half way down the hallway almost at the stairs to the ground floor when I managed to grab his arm to stop him.

"Carson stop."

The moment I touched him he spun around, giving me a harsh glare which instantly caused me to recoil away from him.

"S-sorry."

It seemed like that was finally enough to get him out of his red daze, only enough for him to realise what was going on around him. Just as he took a step towards me, reaching out for me I stepped back again causing him to stop dead in his tracks.

I held his stare for a moment, noticing the way he was clenching his jaw like he always did when he was trying to control himself.

"You said we were going home tonight, why would you drink so much and then-"

"Can we not do this here Daniela. Just come upstairs."

When he cut me off clearly more worried about people overhearing us, I felt my own anger from earlier come back all over again. If he had stuck to what he said and taken me home we wouldn't need to worry about anyone over hearing our conversations.

But he didn't, just like he promised me nothing would happen and now coming here with him turned out to be one of the biggest mistakes I'd made.

"Lead the way." When my words came out with an angry edge just like his, he continued to glare at me, holding my stare before he eventually turned away, heading down the hall and up the stairs to the ground floor.

The only time we stopped on our way to his room was when he handed his car keys to someone, telling them to bring everything from the car upstairs. That was another thing that only made me realise just how much I wanted to go home now. I had so many clothes and things that I had bought in LA and now we were staying in another random place for another night, which meant I had to dig through all of it again to find what I needed.

He had one bag with some clothes from his home in LA that he took with us on our road trip across the entire country. I had three suitcases full of clothes and no matter how grateful I was to him for buying it all, it didn't exactly make it easy staying in hotels for the past three nights and now in this house for the fourth night.

Maybe it seemed petty, but when he's the one who kissed someone else, forgot I was even there, got into a fight, drank too much to stop him from driving us home and now was absolutely furious at me for no reason, I had a right to be a bit upset.

When we finally reached a set of stairs leading to the third floor of the house, I realised it was more like a hotel suite than a room. Apparently the central part of the third floor was Carson's which included a living area which then went into a massive bedroom and an equally large bathroom also with a walk in closet because you wouldn't be a rich mafia guy without a pretentious closet.

As we walked through, I closed each door that we went through to make sure that whoever came to bring our bags upstairs wouldn't hear a word we said.

When walked into his bedroom, Carson suddenly stopped in the middle of the room facing away from me while I stopped to close the second and final door. Once I'd closed the door neither of us said a word while I just looked around at the stunning bedroom I'd just walked into.

Finally after a few moments I was the one who broke the silence.

"What the hell is your problem?"

The moment he heard my voice Carson visibly tensed and from behind I could see him clench his fists. When he didn't respond I stood my ground, glaring at his back as I spoke again.

"Carson."

This time he suddenly spun around to face me, but unlike earlier I wasn't going to step back and show him any signs of weakness.

I was tired of being weak and being treated like I was just there, like I didn't matter. He didn't get to treat me like this just because he felt like it.

"Why are you so angry at me? I haven't done anything, you're the one who-"

"I'm the one who what?" When he rose a challenging eyebrow at me, clearly testing me to see if I had the guts to call him out on everything that had happened, I took a step closer to him.

"You're the one who broke both promises that you made to me today. You promised me nothing bad would happen and you promised you would take me home after."

He kept his cold eyes on me as I took another courageous step towards him.

"You're the one who kissed the woman you've had a long standing relationship with, while you forgot I was even standing there and then you didn't even have the guts to tell her that you have a girlfriend or that you love me, if you even do."

The entire time I spoke he just continued to glare at me although it was clear my words were adding to the fire that was already burning inside him.

"You didn't tell me you talked about screwing me with your friends before you met me, or that you said you were going to kill me."

As I stepped closer to him I could see him holding onto whatever last little shred of composure he had left.

"Now you're the one who's taking all your anger out on me, when I haven't done a thing to you. But I'm guessing you think that's okay, right? Because you're the boss and I'm just your bitch."

The moment I referenced his fight with Grey, when Grey called me Carson's bitch, he suddenly stepped towards me. I thought he was coming towards me but then he just passed by me, heading towards a coffee table where, of course, there was a fancy glass bottle full of alcohol and some glasses.

I stood there watching in disbelief as he poured himself another glass, knocking it back as if he was just drinking water before he put the glass down. Before I could even try to give him hell for it, he suddenly came towards me.

Despite how much I didn't want to, on instinct I stepped backwards at the last second and although the movement caught his attention it didn't stop him from closing the gap between us, placing his hands on my waist as he pulled me into him.

"I'm not him." Despite the fact he'd been drinking, somehow just looking into his eyes he seemed stone cold sober as he leaned in to me. "I'm not him Dani, no matter how much you push me I won't become him. So stop."

"Stop what?" When my words came out barely above a whisper he nuzzled his face into my neck allowing my to feel his breath against my skin. "Testing me, you're trying to see how much it takes to get a reaction from me but you're not going to get one."

I shook my head at him, placing my hands on his shoulders to try and push him away but all he did was tighten his grip on me.

"Carson that's not what I was doing, I know you're not him. But, you're mad at me but I haven't done anything wrong."

"Damn, I know you haven't Dani, I know I'm the one who screwed up. I keepscrewing  up." When he continued to hold me in his arms, mumbling the words against my neck I eventually stopped pushing him, instead just letting him hold onto me.

"Carson..."

"I feel like I'm losing control Dani. Everything is happening around me so fast and I can't stop it, I can't change it. It's just one thing after another, the kiss, the fight, you got upset with me, my mom is upset with me."

Although I couldn't hear the other side of the conversation while he was on the phone downstairs, I didn't think whatever happened was this bad to make him this mad. But apparently it was, for Carson it was anyway.

"She's never not wanted to speak to me Dani. She's my best friend, but I've upset her so much that she hates me."

Just hearing him sound so broken completely melted all my anger away for the moment as he still continued to nuzzle his face into my neck. I wasn't over what happened by any means, I just knew he was upset and I had to help him through it first before we discussed anything about us. One of us had to at least try to keep a clear head to work through this and it wasn't going to be him.

"She doesn't hate you, she's your mom of course she doesn't."

"She does."

"Carson you just have to explain to her what happened. She thinks you ignored her but if you just tell her, she'll understand."

We stood there for a moment as I rubbed his back trying my best to comfort him while he continued to hide his face from me, clearly struggling to control his emotions.

"Do you hate me?"

"No, I don't. I'm mad as hell at you, but I don't hate you." Finally he pulled away from me only enough to look at me as he spoke, still keeping his body pressed against mine. "I didn't mean to hurt you Dani, I never meant for it go this way. I didn't even think about Chloe, I forgot she would be here and when she kissed me I just...froze."

"You held her in your arms Carson." As soon as those memories came back to my mind I took his hands off my waist, taking a step away from him.

"I did it so that I didn't fall over Dani. If I didn't steady her I would have fallen into you and you would have got hurt."

"Seeing you kiss her hurt me."  I tried to keep my voice but he saw straight through my calm facade. "I know it did."

"She told you that she loves you Carson. You should have told her that you love me but you didn't even say anything, you just let me watch you and then you let her call me a whore." When my eyes inevitably filled with tears for the first time that evening, it was almost impossible to control them anymore.

Considering I'd managed not to cry while it happened, during my walk with Aviana and during most of our first fight as a couple, I thought I did pretty well.

"I'm so freaking sorry Daniela. I know they said somethings that were so screwed up and tomorrow I'll deal with that, but it wasn't true. None of it was true. You're beautiful and strong and the most amazing  woman I've ever met." When he took a step towards me, a guilty expression coming onto his face I instantly took one back.

"Why didn't you say anything to her then? Or to Grey? Saying it tomorrow isn't going to mean anything." I wiped the few tears away from my cheeks away while I watched him stop, taking a second to come up with an answer. When he still didn't say anything, I felt my heart begin to break all over again. "You don't love me, do you?"

"What? No, of course I do Dani." This time when he tried to come closer to me I shook my head at him through my tears. "You don't otherwise you would have said it."

Once again he just held my stare as a number of conflicting emotions flashed through his eyes. I was still trying to learn and understand his behaviour, especially in situations like these but it was slowly becoming clear to me what was happening inside his head.

Whenever he feels guilty, angry, upset or he doesn't know how to articulate his sentences, he doesn't know how to deal with it. But he's not used to not knowing how to deal with things so that makes him frustrated which turns into fury. Then he lashes out at the people around him.

It happened while we were locked in that room and it was happening now. It took him a while to find the words to say to me while I just stood there, trying my best to stay calm while I waited for him to process his emotions in his head without pressuring him to talk to me.

"I don't want to be weak Dani, I don't find it easy to say 'I love you' especially in front of other people. I do love you, I love you so much it hurts but I can only say it to you. I can't say it in front of so many other people, it makes me feel weak."

"It doesn't make you weak to say 'I love you', I think it makes you strong." He nodded his head as he slowly took a step towards me and then another when I didn't stop him. "But I'm screwed up Dani, I'm not like you. It doesn't make me feel strong, it makes me feel scared. I feel like I'm giving you something...like this power to crush me if you wanted to."

"I would never hurt you Carson." When he finally reached me, I placed my hand on his cheek, taking his hand in my other.

"You're going to leave me now Dani because you know my head is messed up. When I get angry I lose my composure and I just ruin everything. I don't know how to control my temper for someone else, I've never had to do it. They're used to it, they don't give a shit so I never even tried but now I have you...but I don't know how to do it." When he looked at me with worry and panic swimming in his beautiful eyes, I instantly shook my head.

"I'll never leave you Carson. I'm still learning things about you but I'll learn how to calm you down, I'll always be here for you to talk me."

"I don't do this talking thing, you have no freaking idea how hard I'm finding this right now." Even though I could easily tell he was struggling to stay calm and not get frustrated and angry all over again, I couldn't help but smile at that.

"I think I can guess. You look like you want to kill someone to release all your anger."

When he nodded his head, he pulled me in closer to him. "That sounds like a good idea."

"Well I'm not going to let you do that." When I gave him a small smile, he held my stare for a moment before he brought his face closer to mine. He didn't say anything for a few moments, staring into my eyes like we so often did over the few weeks that we got to know each other.

Very quickly that same tension developed between us and when he spoke this time, his voice much was huskier.

"I need you Dani."

"Carson...I don't think that's the answer." When I shook my head, he instantly tightened his grip on me to stop me from moving away.

"No, I know it's not but I still need you. You said you were going to learn how to calm me down but you do that already, it's just you. That's why I asked you to come upstairs with me because I needed to hug you."

Despite his sweet words that warmed my heart, I somehow I had to find it in me to shake my head, pulling away from him. At first he seemed hurt like I'd rejected him, which of course very quickly morphed into anger.

"Fine."

Before he could try to walk away from me, clearly with the intention of going back to the bottle of alcohol across the room, I grabbed his hand to stop him.

"This is what we're going to do. I'm going to get changed and you're going to go and brush your teeth twice, and then we're going to lie down and talk about why you keep getting angry."

"Why do I need to brush my teeth? And I'm not talking about jack with you."

Choosing to ignore the second half of his sentence, I let go of his hand pushing him towards the bathroom door. It didn't do much since he was built like a mountain but he got the hint anyway when he took a step in that direction.

"You're brushing your teeth because you kissed someone else and I'm not kissing you until I know your mouth is clean."

Without another word he went into the bathroom and I took the time to go and get some clothes from my suitcases that had been left in the hallway outside the living room.

While Carson was in the bathroom I changed my clothes in the living room so that I didn't risk him seeing anything. I felt so stupid when I took off my hoodie, revealing the black lace bra I wore for him.

It was supposed to be a surprise for when we got back to his penthouse in Manhattan, when we were finally home. But instead, I was here and I felt like at any second his anger could permanently damage our relationship. It wasn't exactly the night I had envisioned in my head.

Taking off the lace lingerie set, I changed into a pair of comfy underwear, leaving off my bra as I put on one of his T-shirt's that I'd stolen from his closet in LA.

Despite the fact he took me shopping there was just something about his clothes that made me want to wear them instead.

By the time I got back into the bedroom Carson was sitting at the edge of the bed with his head in his hands. Like me, he was also wearing a fresh T-shirt and some boxers.

At the sound of my entry into the room he lifted his head to look at me, frowning when he saw the white Hugo Boss T-shirt I was wearing.

"I didn't bring that with me."

I gave him a small smile walking towards him, stepping between his legs while I placed my hands on his shoulders and his hands went to my waist.

"This one is mine."

"Yours?" When he rose an eyebrow at me I nodded my head, nuzzling my face into his neck without another word. "I didn't know you had one just like mine and in my size too."

When I felt him turn the back of the collar of the shirt over so that he could see the size, I pressed a kiss to the tattoo on his neck.

"Isn't it such a coincidence?" This time he let out a laugh, gently pushing me away from him so that he could see my face.

Taking that chance, I analysed the injuries that he'd obtained from his fight with Grey. His lip was a little swollen but it didn't look as bad as I thought it was when he was bleeding earlier. The worst injuries were the bruises, one on his jaw and one under his eye.

"My clothes look good on you." Titling my head to the side, I kept my eyes on his tattoos on his arm, trying to avoid making eye contact with him. I could stare at his tattoos all day anyway, so it wasn't hard for me. "You're not mad that I took it?"

"Of course not baby. You can take anything of mine."

"That's good because I took a few other T-shirt's and a hoodie too." My confession caused him to laugh as I traced my hand over one of his tattoos. "Can I kiss you now Dani?"

"Did you brush your teeth?" When I met his eyes he nodded his head, lifting his hand to move some hair away from my cheek before he cupped it in his hand, stroking it with his thumb.

"Twice?"

"Twice. I even used mouthwash."

His words caused me to smile as I leaned in, pressing my lips to his. Although my intention was for it to be a quick kiss, Carson had other ideas. For another few moments I stood between his legs as we kissed until I eventually broke away from him.

"You've had your kiss, now we're going to talk."

Their talk in the next chapter is 😍

What did you guys think of this chapter?

Also I have so many comments to respond to on the previous chapters but I do read them all 😭 I'm just really bad at responding but I will ❤️ Thank you for all your comments and taking the time to comment, I really appreciate it 💞