2: You're a Crazy Woman

ZAB

You know that feeling when someone stared at you while you sleep? That's what I'm getting right now.

But I don't care.

I love to sleep.

I ignored the eerie feeling and enjoyed my slumber.

When I opened my eyes, the first creature I saw was a blessing to the sight.

Ah, red-haired anime guy in his black robe and kingsman umbrella.

"Morning," I mumbled under my breath and turned to the other direction.

And he's fucking standing there already.

What the hell? Nilingon ko ang kabilang dako kung saan ko siya unang nakita. Well, he's not there anymore since he's on the other side. But how the hell did he move so fast?

Teleportation? Whoa, so cool!

But for now, I still want to sleep.

"Wake up," wika ng malalim na boses na tiyak kong sa lalaki.

Paano siya nakapasok sa kwarto ko? By the way, what's the number of the police so that I can report him later for trespassing?

"Elizabeth Alexis Cruz, wake up," I heard him.

That's not me, so I won't.

He poked my butt with a fucking umbrella.

My wriggly butt with his kingsman umbrella!

The audacity of this guy?!

"Don't wake me up. If there's a dead body in my house, man, just bury it. I have a shovel under the bed," nakapikit na wika ko.

"You are the dead body Elizabeth Alexis Cruz."

I got a pillow and covered my head. But the useless pillow didn’t drown out his voice.

"So you have to come with me."

Naiinis na bumangon ako at binato siya ng unan. He caught it before it hits him and he tossed it back to my bed. "I told you if there's a dead body, just bury it or burn it to ashes. Why do you have to interrupt my sleep?"

The guy padded towards my side table at nagsalin ng tubig sa baso. He poured the water in my head.

"What the hell?"

"You're probably going there," sabi niya.

"Where?"

"Hell."

Naiinis na pinahid ko ang kumot sa basang mukha at bumangon. I walked towards the side and removed my dress, leaving me in my garter set and underwear that I wore in last night's stag party. Masyado talaga akong inaantok na hindi ko na nagawang magbihis.

"You wear glittery clothes to sleep..." komento ng lalaking nasa kwarto ko. "And you undress anywhere."

"Anywhere? Nasa kwarto ko ako." Nakahihiya naman sa kanya kung ako pa ang lalabas sa mismong kwarto ko para lamang makapagbihis.

"You undress in front of anyone."

"I told you we can hook up," sagot ko at tinanggal ang mga garter sa binti. I slipped into my normal underwear at nagsuot ng short at T-shirt bago lumabas ng kwarto. Tinungo ko ang sofa kung nasaan ang cellphone ko. The red-haired guy followed me.

"What's your name?" I asked him.

"Dearil," he replied with his deep voice.

Tumango ako at idinial ang hinanap na contact sa cellphone. "Hello, is this the police?" I paused. "Yeah, good morning. Magrerepot lang sana ako ng breaking and entering or trespassing, whatever. Someone's in my house right now and he's suspicious. He wore black—"

My phone was suddenly gone from my hand at ngayon ay nasa kamay ni red hair.

"What are you doing?" he asked and turned off the call.

"Making a call, obviously. Paano mo nakuha ang cellphone ko from that distance?"

His face was emotionless. "And why are you making a call?"

"To report you," sagot ko at sinamaan siya ng tingin. "Look, red-haired guy. If you're not gonna fuck me, get out of my house."

"Can you hold your horny feeling and just accept the fact that you're dead and you're coming with me?" he said. His deep voice boomed around my apartment.

"I'm not horny right now and definitely not dead. If we're not going to fuck in your place then I'm not coming with you," sagot ko sa kanya. Nilagpasan ko na lamang siya at nagpunta na sa kusina. I opened the fridge, inilabas ang strawberry jam at umupo sa mesa matapos kunin ang nangangalahati na lamang na loaf bread.

He followed me again in the kitchen. "Elizabeth Alexis Cruz—"

"Hey, red hair. I told you, it's Cruiz not Cruz." I shoved the bread inside my mouth and pushed the jam and bread to his direction. "Kumain ka na lang muna and leave my house."

"Listen—"

I cut him off. "Alam mo ba kung ilan ang taong may parehas na pangalan sa buong mundo? And do your research well. Fix that typo. What's your name again?"

I know it starts with D... Geez, I'm still sleepy that I cannot recall.

"Dearil."

"Oh, Dearil, dear. Now, eat the bread with strawberry jam while I'm still kind to you or I will kill you for breaking inside my house," wika ko sa kanya.

"You cannot kill me."

I laughed. "Hindi mo alam kung ano ang kaya kong gawin. Why do you think I keep a shovel under my bed? Check my bathroom and you'll see that I have more bleach that drinking water. Pwede kong ibabad sa bleach ang patay mong katawan sa tub. That way, no one will know that a murder has took place in my tub. No evidences left."

He didn't look scared. When I started talking about my shovel, people always say I'm a psycho. No, I'm not. I just find burying a dead body easier than undergoing long investigations and such.

"You cannot kill Death himself."

"What?"

"My name's Dearil which means call of death. I reap souls of dead human."

"Ah, okay," sagot ko at muling kumagat sa tinapay. I think this is even better with coffee. Tumayo ako at kumuha ng tasa at nagtimpla ng kape.

"Ah? That's how you will react after knowing I'm a grim reaper?" he asked.

"Paano ba dapat mag-react? Masho-shock? Hihimatayin? Come on. Soul reaping is not an indecent job so it's not something surprising. Ako nga, nag-i-striptease minsan eh."

He shot me a strange look. "Are you serious?"

"I am."

Out of frustration, he removed the hood that covers his head. His red hair come to my view. Whoah. I like to grip his hair as he does something sexy to me. And oh my gosh, he's so fucking handsome!

"Yo, nice hair."

He scoffed. "This is a curse."

"I dyed my hair red before noong nasa Christian school pa lamang ako. Mommy almost fainted in frustration and anger," natatawang wika ko. "I was sanctioned and forced to repent."

Hindi man lamang siya natawa sa naikuwento ko. Dying your hair while you're in a Christian school is so badass!

"I am a grim reaper, Elizabeth Alexis Cruz."

"Cruiz nga!"

He turned his face on one side, ignoring the correction I made. And what the, I just had a better view of his close to perfection face!

"Dearil, oh my freaking jam. You are seriously hot as hell. Don't you really wanna hookup with me?" I batted my eyelashes, trying to convince him.

He ignored my remark and sat on the chair across me. "You have no idea how hot hell is so don't compare it to anything."

"Okay." Tss, so strict.

"Good."

Muli akong kumuha ng tinapay at nilagyan iyon ng jam. Baka gusto niyang ako pa ang maglagay ng jam para sa kanya. I did and handed the bread to him. "Kainin mo."

"I don't need to eat," sagot niya.

"How can you do well in your job if you're not going to eat?"

His face went blank. "Nutriment in such way is not what I need. Food is not necessarily needed."

"Aw, sayang naman," wika ko at kinain na lamang ang tinanggihan niyang tinapay. "Best things in life are sleep, food and sex."

He looked disgusted. "Why did you die of heart attack and not STD?"

"Excuse me?" Tinaasan ko siya ng kilay. "Dalawang lalaki pa lamang ang natikman ko and I made sure they're clean. I told you I didn't die or anything. Why don't you just die yourself?"

"I told you, I am death."

"Whatever. Maybe I'll bury you later, or soak you in bleach. Choose wisely, red hair."

"Sa lahat ng susunduin kong kaluluwa, ikaw lamang ang hindi pa rin naniniwalang patay na sila. Others believed they're dead but refused to go."

It annoyed me. "That's because I'm not dead, moron. Look, search on Facebook or whatever social media account the name Elizabeth Alexis Cruz because that is definitely not me."

"You're unbelievable." He brushed his red hair with his fingers in frustration.

"And you're annoying me." Hot but annoying. Hotnnoying.

"I'll be back shortly," wika niya. Lumakad siya ng ilang hakbang at bigla na lamang nawala.

What the fuck? That crazy red-haired guy is really something! Teleportation. Oh my gosh, I'm jealous. I want to learn it, too! And when he said shortly, he's back after a few seconds with a grim expression.

"This is frustrating!" bulalas niya.

"Ang bilis mo namang nakabalik."

He walked towards me and stared at my eyes closely. I stared back. Of course, it takes two to tango and staring is the first degree of something sexual. His eyes were grey with with a silver glow inside.

"Red hair?"

"It's Dearil."

I nodded. "Oh my gosh, Dearil. Where the hell did you get your contacts? I want one, it's so beautiful!"

He snorted. "It's natural."

"’Di nga?"

He didn't say more about his eyes at sa halip ay muling naupo. "I believe there's really a mistake. You're not the Elizabeth Alexis Cruz that I'm supposed to reap."

I pouted my lips and licked the strawberry jam that smudged to the side. "Basic. Kasi nga hindi ako Cruz. Cruiz, red hair. Cruiz."

"But..."

My coffee cup suspended near my mouth as I looked at him. "But?"

"But why can you see me?" he asked, shaking his head as he tried to think of the possibilities.

"Are you supposed to be... invisible?" I binked in surprise.

He nodded. "To naked eyes. Only dead people can see me."

Nanlaki ang mga mata ko at napatakip ako sa bibig ko. Then I yelped in his awesomeness. "Oh my gosh! First, it's teleportation then now, invisibility? Oh my gosh. Oh my gosh. Teach me those tricks!"

Nalaglag ang kanyang mga balikat at hindi makapaniwalang napatingin siya sa akin. "I thought you're surprised when you realized that you're probably dead that's why you can see me... You're a crazy woman."