Anika threw her sling on the bed and sat at the edge of the bed, covering her face. She had left quickly while he was answering a call. She was fearful of the outcome of this. He was her world, she had suffered badly when he left her and went so far away. She was suffering now. She  didn't know what turn her life was on. But, it scared her. The pain was more because she still loved him despite everything. But, it was hard to go back to what they had been. Especially after she had seen his interview that evening.

She heard the door click shut and her heart almost stopped momentarily. She looked up to see him angrily walk across the room. He pulled the stool of the dressing table and sat right opposite to her. He leaned forward his elbows on his knees and fingertips of either hand joined. 

She did not look up. She had no courage to. She couldn't fight him. She did not want to. Silence filled both- space and time. With a sigh of finality, he went on his knees before her and held her hand gazing up at her. "Anika, " he called softly.

"Please. No." She looked away sitting up straight trying to pull her hands away from his. Tears rolled down her cheeks once again. 

"Damn it, if you don't talk, if you don't see me we can't fix it." His voice was told how frustrated he was.

"I need to change." She put up a quick excuse. 

"Fine." He pulled away from her giving her room. 

Anika quickly took her clothes and disappeared from the room. He covered his face with his palms in exasperation. He was tensed. He never thought a day like this would ever come in their lives. 

Anika's dam broke. She switched on the shower and cried. She felt miserable. She was used to feeling that way. This wasn't new to her, she had cried so many nights missing his warmth and his presence. She took longer in the shower. She wasn't ready for what was to come. She'd perhaps never be ready for it. She had a gut feeling it would land them up in still worse a situation. But they were already suffering what could be worse than this?

She stepped out dressed in black Patiala and a simple grey kurti. She looked around. He didn't seem to be there. Sighing she went down Radha smiled at her. She didn't have the heart or energy to return that. "Dinner is ready." The woman said. Shivaay had texted her a while ago asking her to prepare something for dinner as there was a change in plan. Anika saw him sitting at the dinning table. His expression got her anxious. It said he was pissed and he meant business. The worse part was, it was for her. She had seen that so many times. He was easily angered but never at her. She silently sat beside him. The older woman also joined them. In silence the trio ate the woman had quickly sensed the tension between the couple.

Anika walked away immediately after completing her dinner. Shivaay sat chewing thoughtfully. He had to keep his calm.  As a matter of fact, he knew his anger was bad. Biting his tongue he tried to control his frustration. This had to end. He got up wishing the woman a good night. 

He entered the room to find her sitting on the bed watching Tom and Jerry.  He shut the door and then switched off the TV. 

"I was watching."

"We need to talk."

"Everything doesn't go according to your wishes." She snapped back, switching on the television. He glared at her and then switched off the main power supply and pulled out the plug. 

She turned away and grabbed her phone anger written all over her face. He strode to her side of the bed and sat before her.

"Anika, stop being stubborn and..

" Why only you have the right to be stubborn? " she glared at him and then looked back at the screen.

He lost his patience. He grabbed the phone from her hand and slammed it against the bed cover beside him. "I m trying to fix things."

"Fix what? Isn't everything perfect ? Give me my phone. "

His eyes shot daggers at her. She was growing on his nerves. She had never been so impractical and mad at him

He scooted closer to her, staring intently at her.An intense eye lock followed. He finally gave up, " Anika Please. Don't do this to us."

She looked at him painfully. "This pains, doesn't it? What was that what you did to us? You are no one to snatch what's between us. It's ours. " she teared up.

"Anika, why don't you understand.."

"I-I don't understand? really Shivaay?  I have been--" she pressed her lips against each other. She didn't want to cry. She went closer to him grabbing his collar. "I am tired Shivaay. I am tired of this phrase.." She extended her hand and grabbed her phone back from the bed. Scrolling through it she opened the list of his messages and turned the screen to him. "Every message Shivaay... One year and all you said is...." She turned the screen to herself reading from it.

"Thanks for understanding."

"Thank you fire being the most understanding wife"

She scrolled frantically reading out-

"I am so glad you understand."

She scrolled, "and then..after that day..

" Anika please understand. "

"I hope you understand."

"I hope you understand."

"Please understand."

"I know you'd understand."

She went on and on and then threw her phone beside her. Looking at him with pain, she asked him, "Do you understand me? No . You don't. " she sobbed. 

He was left numb with what he witnessed. He had never seen her so vulnerable, so much in pain. Her eyes were screaming her pain. His own clouded as he bit his tongue to hold himself together. "Anika - Listen.. I ...did everything for us.."

She peered at him painfully. "For us? " she smiled ironically. She cried bitterly. He held her shoulders. "Don't. "

He stared at her helplessly as she pushed away his hand. 

"I am okay. I am fine. I am used to it!" 

He winced looking at her. "An-Anika.."

"Please. Don't. ...Leave me. I will be okay. I need time. Go."

"I won't!" He gulped.

" You said that before. You went. You broke your promise. You broke your promise. You said six months..you lied. You broke.. " she cried rubbing her watering nose from the back of her palm. 

He looked at her painfully. He couldn't see her hurt. She had so many scars. It was so hard to believe that unwillingly he had caused it. An acute pain seized his heart. He had bloody caused her so much pain. He had never been seeing the scars he was leaving. How long had she kept this within her. Why hadn't she told him before ? Or had he been so deaf and blind?

"I won't.. I am not leaving you.."

"Please. Enough Shivaay. Not again. " her eyes narrowed at him accusingly.

"Anika, I won't!" He stated firmly but it sounded like a pleading appeal desperate to be heard.

She shot him a painful look and grabbing her phone swiped it in haste. "Your interview, hear what you had said.. There is the script right down under it.. read it.."

He sighed, understanding what she meant. "Anika it was an interview, I just said that to draw the interest of foreign companies. It's a business tactic nothing more. I am not going anywhere. I swear by my life-" she shut his mouth. 

"Don't. Don't swear. Please. Don't. " She couldn't let him swear on is life. What if he did not keep it- No. 

He pulled her hand down, "You don't trust my words. ?" His hurt was evident.

"Tell me how to, I will. Tell me. You said you'd come back soon, you didn't stick to that. You'd promised we would never fight. We are fighting again. You said one week.. And yet again pushed your plan. Teach me how to trust your words, I can't find the way myself!" She confessed in a mere whisper. 

He gulped. She was saying the truth. He himself didn't know how to make her trust him this time. 

"I don't want to depend on you again. I am scared to." She said softly holding his hand. "It pains to not show you how much I love you. It pains to keep myself from reaching you. Shivaay I am in pain. Tell me...tell me..." She screamed crying. 

"I want to...to be like before.. It's hard. I am scared. I don't want you to leave me again. Shivaay - when you left, I held myself with that hope you gave me before leaving. You crushed that. You hurt my love. You called it immaturity. I have held myself with great difficulty. The next time I will collapse Shivaay. I will shatter. I am scared. I don't want to break Shivaay. The last, I don't want you to be the reason." She confessed and he was already bleeding with the scars her pain gave. Her pain inflicted pain. He was guilty. How deeply could this woman love him? Was he really worthy of her love?

-Anami!