043. BROKEN // LUCKY

When Rory woke, she had no idea where she was.

Dammit, Ro. You had such a good track record, the voice in her head sneered. Back to whoring around, waking up in unknown rooms with-

Wait. Hold on.

Rory reached behind her and tugged open the blind, allowing a sliver of light to pour into the room.

She was in Harry's bed.

I know where I am!

You act like that's a fucking accomplishment, the voice snarked.

Shut up. Wait. When did I end up here? The last thing I remember was the dining room table when-

The front door slamming shut, followed by distant voices, caught her attention. She looked at the clock on the nightstand.

Almost six at night? I guess he really did fuck me to sleep this time.

For someone who had slept for possibly twelve hours straight, Rory felt exhausted. How on earth was that possible? She internally groaned, thinking about how her sleep schedule would be a disaster.

Her stomach grumbled with an alarmingly loud noise. Food was a necessity.

Crawling out of bed, she made her way straight to the bathroom. Eyes falling on her reflection, she paused to stare at herself for a moment. Her hair was damp and braided, and she wore one of Harry's shirts and a pair of cotton shorts. It was different from what she put on last night. Did she braid her hair? Her sex-exhausted brain couldn't remember.

What really caught her eye were the marks on her neck. She pulled at the collar of her shirt, seeing how far down they went. Across her collarbones and shoulders, she could see every place he sucked and bit at her skin.

Maybe he really is a vampire, she thought to herself and giggled.

Rory lifted her shirt to see more marks covering her breasts.

Although the activities from the early morning were still a foggy memory, what she saw in the mirror didn't alarm her. Not at all.

It was just a reminder of all the time spent focusing on her pleasure. Rory wanted to be ruined by him. And if this was his way of doing so, she was more than happy to continue.

"Look at you," his voice flooded through her head, "All ready for me..."

Rory pictured him saying those words just like he had earlier. And suddenly, she remembered it - laying back on the dining room table, naked from him ripping her clothes off. She recalled him speaking to her in a voice that sounded like the whisky he had finished drinking, edging her on with each word and leaving her craving his lips on her skin.

She remembered him going down and reminding her how expertly skilled his tongue was. God - did he ever know what to do. Her hands wanted to grab something, but the sides of the table did little to help, so her only option was tugging on his hair. Something she quickly learned turned him on.

Her hands gripped the edge of the sink, trying to calm herself down. But that one action only filled her mind with the memory of grabbing onto the table as Harry fucked her from behind. His hand snaked through her hair and pulled, forcing her back to arch.

Rory realized how amazing it was to give up her control to someone and yet feel so safe. She knew they now had that trust between them - the kind he mentioned when she first spent the night. And as he pulled her back, pressing her back against his front, she heard it in his voice as he said,

"I'm so lucky to have you, Rory."

The words made her feel the same way they did hearing it for the first time hours earlier - a four-letter word she didn't dare to admit.

But it was there.

And it was real.

Rory just didn't know it yet.

Splashing her face with cold water, she finished up in the bathroom and headed to the dresser to grab a sweater. Even though Rory liked the marks left behind on her skin, she wasn't in the mood to hear comments from anyone that wasn't Harry.

Her attention fell to the bed, and she noticed his side made. Did he make it before leaving? How long had he been awake? He usually left her a note whenever he left - even if he was just downstairs. But there was nothing on the bedside table. Rory checked the floor in case it fell.

For a second, she worried he may have left for the day to do... whatever it was he did. Kill someone? Save a cat from a tree? Fly around the moon? The possibilities were endless.

Hearing his voice from downstairs, her skin flushed, and butterflies fluttered in her stomach - all because she heard him speak. Wow.

Once the rush of pathetic little emotions had passed, Rory listened to what Harry was saying.

"What the fuck am I supposed to think when we go through that weasel's apartment and find this?"

A voice spoke but was far too quiet for her to hear. Rory would have done what she could to stay hidden and spy on the conversation, but her stomach rumbled too aggressively for her liking. That's how she knew she had to be starving - she was willing not to spy over it.

Walking down the stairs, she heard Harry angrily reply, "This didn't piss me off quite like you showing up unannounced at my fucking house!"

"I did call. Blame the little one you have hiding around here somewhere for not letting you know."

Rory's entire body stilled hearing that voice. Her hand gripped the railing with such a tight grasp she could feel her knuckles turning white. God, please, no, the voice inside her head cried. But as her eyes met the source of the voice standing in the living room, her fears became a reality.

"Ah, there she is," Giovanni chimed with a grin. "I was told I wouldn't get a chance to see you. But I guess you can't stay away, can you?"

Swallowing the lump in her throat, her voice was shaky and full of evident nerves as she asked, "What's going on?"

"Just stopped by for some business, Bambolina."

Rory turned to Harry for some answers, but the man who filled her with a sense of safety and protection seemed far more interested in anything but giving her comfort. It appeared a bottle of alcohol was far more worth his time and attention.

Giovanni, catching on to where her focus was, said, "You know," he turned to Harry, "Now it all makes sense why you got so upset that night at the club."

Colson stepped forward, tugging on her arm. "Rory, go back upstairs."

"Why?"

"I agree with her, Colson. Why should she go upstairs? Don't you think she would like to know about all the men who took a keen interest in Harry's girl?" Giovanni looked at Rory. "Oh, come on, Bambolina. You don't remember? It was the night you were out with your friends without his permission. The poor boy was desperate for money; I was sure he would accept."

"Accept what?"

Harry rolled his eyes, reaching for a glass and immediately filling it to the brim with liquid. "And, clearly, I didn't," he replied, ignoring Rory's question completely.

"Well, of course. But that was after you jacked up the price so high and only backed out once you spotted her." Giovanni took a sip from his glass. "I must admit, Bambolina, I never thought I'd see the day where you would be like this. It's quite... fascinating." Something devious sparkled in the man's eyes. "Would you do anything for him?"

Her instinct was to say yes. And knowing that such a reply was true left her surprised and, quite honestly, a bit confused. Rory was used to surviving on her own. If the last week showed her anything, it was that she and Harry would make an unstoppable team.

So why did it feel so wrong to admit it out loud?

"I..." the one word fell from her mouth as she struggled to reply with anything other than the truth. "I-I guess it depends."

With a large grin, Giovanni stepped forward, gripping her chin with his hand. "Aw, aren't you adorable? Doing anything for your man... I guess that happens when you mix business and pleasure, hmm?" He turned her head to the side and tutted, running his finger over the slight bruise marks on her skin. "Those don't look good, Bambolina. Did you take another tumble?"

Stepping back and forcing Gio to drop his touch, Rory looked to Harry for help. But his attention appeared far too occupied by the glass in his hand to notice.

"At least Harry no longer has to worry about his money troubles." Noting her confused expression, Giovanni added, "Oh, did you not hear the good news?"

"What good news?"

"We're business partners."

Rory didn't know what emotion was desperately trying to burst through - it was a mixture of a scream of anger and wanting to curl into a ball and cry. Tears pricked her eyes, but she tried to keep it all in, causing her skin to flush with heat. However, when she looked desperately at Harry, hoping he would explain that it wasn't the case, he was still more intrigued by his beverage.

Look at me, you fucking idiot! She wanted to scream at him. But she knew if she opened her mouth, the angry scream cries would instead be released. Therefore, she returned her gaze to the ground and silently prayed to whoever was watching over her that this was all a terrible dream.

"And speaking of business, how could I forget that there's another thing to celebrate tonight. Harry tells me you're working for him again," Giovanni said, raising his glass. "I guess we will be seeing a lot more of each other, Bambolina."

"W-Why?"

Giovanni turned to Harry. "Wow, you really don't tell her anything, do you?" He looked back at the frightened girl in front of him. "I have taken over most of the management. In charge of various day-to-day activities, including staffing." Stepping forward, he tucked two fingers under her chin and tilted her head. "And now, my days have gotten far more exciting knowing you will be there. Maybe I'll even get lucky enough to see how you mix your business and pleasure."

Rory slapped his hand away, cowering against the wall.

"That's enough," Colson (much to Rory's surprise) snapped.

"Aw, don't tell me there's a little love triangle going on already?"

"No. But you're being highly inappropriate."

Giovanni gestured behind him. "Harry doesn't seem to mind."

Unfortunately for the scared Bambi, that was true. While she shook in fear over the prospect of her new boss, Harry filled up his glass for the third time and barely spared a glance in her direction.

So much for keeping you safe, the voice in her head sneered.

"Well, he's not the only one whose opinion matters here." Colson grabbed hold of Rory's arm and pulled her towards the stairs. Looking down at the frightened girl in front of him, he nodded to the second floor and quietly whispered, "Go."

A thank you was on the tip of her tongue, yet impossible to say due to her state of shock. Out of everyone in the room, Colson was the last person she expected to stand up for her - let alone care about her in the first place.

Hurrying up the stairs, Rory should have headed straight for her room and locked the door. But instead of doing the smart thing, she sat near the railing and eavesdropped.

"Was that necessary?" Colson snapped.

"Oh, come on," Gio's voice said, "It's just a bit of fun."

"Fun for who?"

"Me, of course." Gio chuckled. There was a pause, followed by the sound of a glass placed on the table. "You have hit the jackpot with that one. This is the first time I've ever seen someone break her."

Break her?

Gio's voice dropped to a lower volume. "You can see it in her eyes. She would do anything for you."

"I know," Harry flatly replied.

"That's quite an asset. I'm sure it will come in handy, don't you?"

"Why wouldn't it be?" Harry's voice became easier to hear, and Rory spotted him near the door. "I broke the last one, which did wonders for business."

A burst of dark laughter erupted from Gio. "I can only imagine how much better she will be than timid little Juliet."

Rory felt a prick in the palm of her hands. Looking down, she was surprised to see small spots of blood caused by her nails digging into her flesh. She ran her hands against her thighs, smearing the small amount of red. With her mind overwhelmed with confusion, Rory didn't realize she was self-inflicting pain. But nothing hurt as bad in comparison to what she was hearing.

The front door opened, and she spotted Gio's silhouette exit the house before Harry went to follow.

Colson grabbed his arm. "Hey," he whispered harshly. "Don't you think you should check on her before you go?"

"Why the fuck would I do that?"

"Are you serious?"

Harry checked over his shoulder as if he was ensuring Gio was out of earshot. "Back off, Colt. I don't know what the fuck got into you tonight, but you crossed a line."

"Excuse me?"

"Rory has me looking out for her - she doesn't need you hovering over her like a watchdog. So you can keep playing saviour tonight all you want, but I know her way fucking better than you ever will. And I know she's fine."

Without another word, Harry walked out the door and slammed shut it behind him. Rory finally took that as her cue to hide away in her room, but she remained frozen in her spot. A pain swarmed her head. What was better: overhearing the conversation or living in a peaceful, blissful bubble of oblivion? At least in oblivion, she could have created excuses for his behaviour to make herself feel better.

But instead, stuck in reality, she had to suffer with the truth.

Harry didn't know her at all - he practically admitted it downstairs.

Otherwise, he would have stood up for her or (at the very least) done the bare minimum and checked in on her before leaving. Rory would have accepted him just coming upstairs to tell her he was leaving over nothing at all. She would have been okay with him even yelling it from downstairs.

But he didn't do any of that. He just left.

Colson sighed and turned around, shaking his head as his eyes drifted to the top of the stairs. He froze, spotting her. In another unlikely turn of events, Colson expressed a look of sadness and pity towards her, something Rory instantly realized she hated. Shit had to be bad if Cheese, of all people, was on her side and feeling bad for her.

They didn't exchange any words because nothing needed to be said.

Colson knew she had heard everything.

And Rory was crying over it.

Rory was the first to break the unannounced stare-off with Cheese as she slowly made her way to her feet and walked back into the bedroom. Her stomach rumbled, but the last thing she wanted was to go downstairs.

All she wanted to do was hide under the covers and pretend this was all a terrible dream.

Every time she let herself think things were fine, something crashed down. She couldn't help but think it was a reminder that she would never find happiness. The life she wanted, the one of blissful happiness and love, was a dream - something she would never be allowed to have.

Rory didn't even try to convince herself she was overreacting; she couldn't pretend nothing was wrong.

She was hurt.

Hurt over the fact he left.

Hurt he called her broken.

Hurt because he thought he knew her.

Rory always thought he was a book written in invisible ink. And now she felt the same as him except without the book or the ink. She just felt invisible.

"Rory?"

Her head lifted off the pillow.

"Can you open the door?"

She sniffled, wiping her eyes. "Why?"

"Because my hands are full." Colson released a sigh. "Please, Rory."

Far too exhausted to put up a fight, Rory got out of bed and opened the door. Her eyes widened, spotting the tray in his hands. "What is that?"

"Food," he replied shortly.

"For me?"

He nodded.

"Why?"

"Because I know you haven't eaten all day." Colson entered the room without waiting for an invitation and placed the tray on the bed. "Sit."

She did as instructed, blaming her obedience on her hunger. Looking down at the bowl shoved into her hands, she asked, "Did you poison this?"

"No."

"Would you tell me if you had?"

"No."

"That doesn't make me feel-"

"Just eat the fucking food, Rory!" Colson snapped. Immediately recognizing his tone, he took a deep breath and sat beside her. "Sorry. Clearly, I'm not good at..." he motioned to her sadness, "comforting."

Rory looked down at her bowl and dug the fork into the pasta. "Did you make this?"

"Yeah. Why? Is it shit?"

"No. It's good," she said, giving him a small smile. "Thank you."

Colson returned a slight hint of a smile before it disappeared, and his expression turned to his normal state.

Her eyes fell to the tray. It looked as if Colson had raided the cupboard filled with the snacks she liked and brought them all up. Whatever this twisted, upside-down universe she had woken up in was weird, to say the least. Everyone was now acting differently. Harry's attitude and how he spoke about her felt worse than when he wanted to kill her. And Colson was bringing her food and snacks.

"Why did you do this?"

"Because I know you haven't eaten anything all day."

"But you hate me," she said, taking another bite. "Wouldn't you take pleasure knowing I was withering away up here?"

Colson rolled his eyes. "Despite what you think of me, Rory, I'm not a completely heartless monster."

Rory pushed a piece of pasta around with her fork. "Can I ask you something?"

"Sure."

"Do you remember that car that was following me? The one I told you about and-"

"It wasn't me."

"I didn't ask if-."

"That doesn't mean you didn't think it was."

Turning her attention down to her bowl, her brow furrowed. Damn. Was Cheese a mind reader now? Or am I just that predictable? No. I'm perfect at pretending. I do it all the time.

"I don't believe you," she finally said.

Colson shrugged in response. "I don't care." He pointed to the bowl. "I'm not leaving until you finish that."

For some reason, hearing that made her want to eat even slower.

"Why do I bother you so much?"

"Because you ask too many questions and don't do what I tell you to." He grabbed hold of her wrist and jabbed a piece of pasta before lifting the utensil to her mouth. "Eat."

Swallowing the food, she asked, "Are you seeing anybody?"

"Why do you care?"

"I'm just making conversation." She took another bite. "You know, learning more about you makes me mighty hungry..."

Colson rolled his eyes. "No, I'm not. Are you?"

The question was asked with heavy sarcasm, but Rory answered it anyway, admitting in a whisper, "I don't know anymore."

"Rory..."

Oh, god. She hated that tone, one that dripped in pity. "It's fine, Colson."

If it wasn't obvious she wasn't okay before it sure was now - all because Rory used his name.

"Harry does care about you. Trust me," the words sounded like they were painful for him to say, "I know he does. Sometimes his brain stops him from thinking like any normal person... and he can't see who he's hurting."

Rory studied his expression, seeing the sadness in his eyes that matched hers. In that one look, something told her they shared an experience, that he understood her pain.

"The harsh truth is that no matter how much he cares for you, it will never change how his brain works. Once that switch flips, he can't just go and turn it off."

She chewed the last bite of food slowly, thinking about his words. Placing the empty bowl on the tray, she asked, "That's what happens when he goes to work, right? The switch flips?"

Colson stayed silent.

"It's been getting worse, hasn't it?" she continued. "I can see it in his eyes when he comes back from work. It's the same look he had when he killed that man in front of me... but far worse."

"He can't escape it, Rory." Colson stood and grabbed her empty bowl, leaving the tray of treats on the bed. "No matter what he says to convince himself or those around him, he can't escape it." His tone was direct, almost like a warning for her. "As much as he tries, he will never be that guy for you. Harry will always put himself first. Even if that means he's hurting the ones he loves."

Rory watched as Colson walked to the door, signalling their conversation was over. But that didn't stop her from asking, "Is that why Juliet died?"

"Do you want to know the truth?"

She nodded.

"Yes."

"Why are you being so honest with me?"

"Because Harry's not the only one that blames himself for Juliet's death. And I would hate for it to happen again." 

oh haroldina... what are you doing to my poor lil rory