Honestly, I don't even know where to begin 🤷‍♀️

I don't wanna trouble anyone and y'all are more than free to leave if you don't wanna read this. In fact, I wasn't even sure if I should write this. But I'm just...I'm kinda in a pinch. I don't really have anyone ATM that I can talk to about this or just share my rants and, as the title states, I just REALLY needed to get this off my chest (FINALLY).

It's nothing too serious TBH, but my emotions seem to be at an all time high RN. I won't get into too much details, but I just feel so STRESSED. Which, of course, is normal. I know everyone gets stressed or even depressed sometimes, but today in particular I just CAN'T y'know? I've been like this quite a lot of times before, too, and I've even thought about writing something like this but I never got around to (until now that is). But I simply couldn't take it anymore. I've been trying so hard to hold back, but it seems that today my feelings just won't let me rest and I've even forced myself not to cry a few times (which isn't so easy to do especially when I've been around others today and it was kinda challenging for me to put up a calm facade when my eyes were aspiring to become fooken waterfalls =_=).

I don't wanna be some kind of stupid drama queen (I'm already a trash queen anywhore LMAO), and I'm honestly not so used being this open and vulnerable unless I'm with people that I'm SUPER close to (which are pretty few) and that is still fairly rare. And, again, I won't go into details but lately I just feel so PUSHED. Excuse me for sounding like such a stereotypical teenager, but I just feel like no one gets me. And I LOVE my family, but sometimes I feel like that even they don't understand me and I can't even attempt to REALLY share my inner problems with them (especially my mom who's so tough and callous often to too much of a degree).

I just want a break, y'know (DON'T WE ALL)? I can't even BEGIN to say how many times I've thought of running away. An absolutely riddikulus idea, I know, and something that I would never do. But still, I can't help but play with the thought. Sometimes I just envision myself boldly sneaking out in the middle of the night while everyone's fast asleep with a bag full of my essentials and just DISAPPEAR. I'd probably end up being lured with Wi-Fi by a weirdo dancing clown in the sewers and having my jelly arms bitten off, but I think that I would've very much enjoyed my freedom even for a bit 😅

Haa... I think, for now, this settles my thoughts. I honestly already feel a lot better. And if you've actually stayed and finished this whole shiznicks show, then thank you. I feel like I don't express it enough, but I SERIOUSLY appreciate you guys like crazy. I have some friends here that I'm especially close to, but I truly love ALL of you so goddamn much. It may only be online, but I do often feel connected to y'all and I don't deserve your guys' wonderful and mind boggling support. Ya really don't know how much it means to me! 🖤🖤🖤

Ugh, sorry for being SO cheesy 😖 But it's only the truth! I'm also very sorry if I was such a Debbie Downer on this part, but thanks for putting up with this awkward and horrible piece of shit mess of a mistake of a hoonam being xD

With that said, here's a lil something to hopefully brighten your day:

🤣🤣🤣