Book Title: Welcome to White Pine Ranch

Review: Free

Blurb, Chapter 1

Blurb:

I like the blurb. It is short and a little lacking in detail, but it leaves a lot to the imagination which isn't a bad thing. You obviously love horses, so what better way to show that than to write a book about them? I love horse films! I used to watch Flicka repeatedly when I was younger, oh my god, the feels! I cried so much when Flicka started to love the girl back and she finally let her ride her. Mustangs are such beautiful creatures. I might have to watch that again!

Only mistake in the blurb - "it's surface" should be "its surface."

Chapter 1

Bloody hell! I have never, EVER, EVER said this before in a critique, but you've actually inspired me to continue writing my next chapter. I've been stuck with writer's block for a while with Black and reading this chapter has gave me such wonderful ideas. I thank you SO much for that.

The chapter is amazing. NO mistakes. None. It was beautiful, paced sufficiently, great balance between thoughts, description and dialogue, and it's in THIRD FRICKEN PERSON. Usually people have difficulty writing in third, but not you, nope.

 I felt like it was still written in "I" I could feel and understand Riley on a different level. Her wittiness and sarcasm is something that I love, how she's able to have a little criminal side but she's still actually quite sweet deep down. 

Yes, it's about horses, and a ranch, but there's a great story there. A plot that stands out. Two delinquents sent to the same punishment, for a summer of a lifetime. I really like Cole! I love how he held back swearing in front of her at the last moment haha I think the two of them are going to get up to mischief!

The dialogue is perfect. You are one incredible author! I can't even say this enough, reading this was like breathing. Easy, slow, realistic, as gentle as a breeze. 

Your descriptions were beautiful. You made me imagine the ranch and the house perfectly as though I was there, which is very rare. 

The HUMOR. I laughed quite a bit! Like I said, I love the witty side of Riley. She's very mature for her age and grounded, and that reckless part of her feels like just an excuse to face what she's truly afraid of; opening up to people. I get this sense as she doesn't like talking much. I hope she opens up to Cole, and I double hope she finds a mustang she can help and save. Mustangs are misunderstood.

I really want to continue reading, I feel hooked already, but like I said, I'm inspired. So I will get round to reading more soon, I'll be adding it to my reading list. (something else I've never said in a critique, because I don't lie) aha 

Incredible start!!!!!!!

I love it because it's not cliche. It's not set in a boring high school with teenage problems. It's different, fresh, and I can't recommended it enough! IF YOU'RE READING THIS, CHECK THE BOOK OUT.

Your writing is so authentic and natural talent. It's that good I'm actually suspicious. Just kidding ;-) I look forward to reading more. Don't request a critique from me again because you don't need my help, you need readers!

Overall Rating: 9/10

O_O

What the hell have you done to me? 

You only miss out from full marks because I feel like the cover could be bolder and more imaginative.

Recommended: YES! What are you waiting for? Check it out!