Kayleb's strong arms closed around her waist and Vanessa trembled as he pressed his lips against her ear and whispered how much he loved her. Faith laughed happily as she ran in the sunshine with Scout on her heels. Vanessa looked behind her and saw the family all sitting around the picnic table, their jokes and laughter floating on the breeze.

"Are you gonna put that tray away or are you thinking of eating that leftover tapioca?" Janice asked with a chuckle. Vanessa was startled from her daydreams and looked at the heavy set middle aged nurse and then down at the tray full of patient 204's leftover dinner.

"I'm not that hungry yet." Vanessa replied as she sat the tray down on the cafeteria cart for the cooks to come pick up later. In truth Vanessa had not eaten much of anything in two weeks... Food seemed to have lost its appeal... Everything in life seemed duller and less colorful these days.

"I know you like to keep your private life private, sweetie, but you seem awfully sad these days..." Janice said putting her hand on her wide hip. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"No. No I don't." Vanessa said quickly. "Thank you for asking though." Janice nodded and looked up at the clock.

"Looks like your shift is over, sweetie. Go on and spend some time with that angel of yours. That will help you feel better." Vanessa nodded and gathered her things before leaving the hospital. She drove to Faith's daycare, completely exhausted from her twelve hour shift, and was told that Faith had once again acted out during the day and made another student cry.

Faith had been acting out ever since leaving Kayleb and Vanessa didn't blame her because Vanessa had not been acting like herself either.

They walked into the house and Faith instantly ran back to her bedroom with Scout and Vanessa heard her door slam shut. Vanessa was too tired and emotionally sore to deal with her daughters temper just now. She wanted nothing more than to collapse on the couch for the rest of the night but dinner was not going to cook itself.

She cut the chicken she had thawed out that morning and put it and some frozen vegetable on to sauté before putting some water on to heat for rice. She was just walking back to the couch to sit for a moment when a knock came on the door.

"Steven?" Vanessa gasped when she opened the door and her ex-husband was standing there.

"Hi Nessa." he said, calling her the nickname he had always used before their son had died.

"What are you doing here?" Vanessa asked. Dealing with Steven was not something she had the energy for.

"I want to see Faith." he replied gently. Vanessa's eyes narrowed as she looked him up and down. His clothes were wrinkled but they were clean. He didn't stink. His face was freshly shaven and his eyes looked clear.

"You seem different." she said as she moved aside and let him walk in.

"Let's just say that someone said some things to me that I needed to hear and I've been over two weeks clean and sober now. I want to be a real father to Faith... I've missed out on too much." Vanessa wanted to believe him. Faith needed her father, especially now that her mother was living in a fog.

"She's in her room playing. You are welcome to stay and eat dinner with us."

"Thank you, Nessa, I won't let you down this time. I promise." Steven said reaching out for her hand. Vanessa pulled away.

"Go spend time with your daughter." Steven's shoulders fell.

"Right... I should have known that bridge had been burnt." he replied.

"Blown up with a whole truckload of C-4 explosives." Vanessa nodded in agreement.

"Well you'll make some man real happy someday. I just wish I hadn't let you get away." Steven said sadly. Vanessa felt her already shattered heart get a new crack.

"Just go spend time with your daughter, Steven, and leave me alone.... Please?" Steven nodded and walked away from her and down the hallway, rubbing the back of his neck as he went.

"Daddy!" Faith exclaimed happily when he opened the door and she caught sight of him.

"Hello nugget!" he exclaimed just as happily. Vanessa threw herself down in the kitchen chair and buried her face in her hands. She had always worked hard to be strong but she just couldn't do it anymore... Without Kayleb she gave up.

"What's wrong with you, Nessa?" Steven asked after he had tucked Faith into bed and Vanessa was walking him to the door.

"Nothing." Vanessa replied quickly. Steven sighed.

"Something is wrong." he said. "I haven't been a great guy the last three years but there were six years before that, that you and I were pretty damn close and I know you." Vanessa wanted to tell him to go to hell but that would take too much energy so she just flopped herself down on the couch and crossed her arms over her chest.

"See, something is wrong. The old Vanessa would have told me to kiss her ass and go to hell for acting like I knew her! You might as well talk to me." he said and he sat down beside her.

"It's none of your business, Steven."

"Faith says she's mad at you because you told her that you two could live with them werewolves and then you made her leave. That man, Kayleb, was he somebody special to you?" At the mention of Kayleb's name Vanessa fell apart. She curled up into a tiny ball at the end of the couch and sobbed.

Steven stared at her in shock for several long seconds. He had never seen Vanessa cry. Even when Matthew had died, she had held it all together and been strong and that was part of what had sent him over the edge... He had wanted to see her hurt the same way he was hurting and it had made him feel alone and ashamed when she had simply held her head high and soldiered on through the pain.

He reached out a tentative hand and touched her shoulder, knowing that he might very well lose his arm for doing so and he was shocked speechless when she turned and buried herself against his chest.

"I love him so much, Steven!" she gasped through her tears. "Love isn't even a strong enough word for how I feel. That man is everything. He has my heart and soul and without him I just can't seem to be happy." Steven's heart broke to know that her heart would never again be his but it broke even more to know that she was hurting this badly.

"Why can't you be together?" he asked. Vanessa explained the situation to him as she kept her face pressed against his wrinkled black t-shirt.

"I think that if you love him this much then you need to be with him. Just love him for as long as you have left, Vanessa. I know what it's like to have and then lose you and I can promise you right now that that man is probably just as miserable as you are."

"I never wanted to hurt anybody, Steven."

"I know you didn't, Nessa." he said as he ran his fingers through her thick hair. "It's just sometimes you are too strong and protective for your own good." Vanessa gave a humorless laugh as she pulled away from him and looked at large wet stain on the front of his shirt.

"This is a change isn't it? Me breaking down and crying on you." Steven shrugged.

"I kind of like it. I never got a chance to be the strong one when we were married."

"You weren't cut out to be the strong one." Vanessa reminded him and he shook his head.

"No I wasn't." he agreed. "But I'm here now." Vanessa nodded and let him wrap her back in a hug. She laid her head on his chest and cried over how hard life could be sometimes.

Steven held her for what felt like hours and finally he realized that her tears had stopped and her breathing had deepened. He looked down at her and saw that she had fallen fast asleep against him. The poor woman worked herself to the bone.

He stood up and lifted her into his arms. She groaned and snuggled closer to him and he felt his heart break. He had made a colossal mistake when he had let this woman go but he wasn't going to let Kayleb make the same kind of mistake. He would go to Kayleb himself and tell the man to chase after Vanessa and not let her get away.

He laid her down in her bed and pulled the covers up to her chin before pressing a gentle kiss to her forehead and leaving the room. He poked his head in Faiths room but she was sound asleep with Scout curled up at the foot of the bed.

He walked out to the kitchen, washed the dinner dishes, slipped on his shoes and left, making sure to lock the door behind him.

***

Kayleb held the pistol against his chest. This would be so simple. A liquid silver round, straight to the heart would definitely kill him and then he wouldn't have to hurt anymore. The wolf in him was desperate to end the pain and the man in him was just as tired.

He looked around the drab New York apartment that he had run to after breaking his grandma's dish. It belonged to Jake but Kayleb didn't care. It was somewhere away from sympathetic eyes and people trying to talk to him about his problems.

He didn't want to fucking talk about his problems! Talking was not going to make them any better and it sure as hell wasn't going to fix the fact that half of his soul had been ripped out of him. He had to have Vanessa. Her scent, her touch, her gentle voice, were all as vital to him as oxygen and if he couldn't have her then he would rather be dead.

He had been here in this apartment for nearly twenty-four hours. It was time for him to end his pain. Time for him to shut up the wolf inside his head that was crying out for a mate he couldn't have. He took a long swig from the whiskey bottle in his hands and then pressed the gun tight against his chest. He could feel his heart beating against the barrel.

He closed his eyes, took one last long breath and was just about to squeeze the trigger when a picture of Faith flashed through his mind and his eyes flew open as he threw the gun across the room.

What was he doing? He had promised that little girl that she could call him or come to him anytime... He couldn't kill himself and turn his words into lies. But he couldn't live this way anymore either. It was time to go and get what was his....