Song: Cold Feelings By Social Distortion (Acoustic) -Sorry only had lyrics with faster song...

The result of not listening to my dad and going to the party without his permission lands me being grounded. I'm freaking eighteen but since I still live at home under his roof and go to school I have to go by his rules.

Needless to say I'm stuck at home the rest of the weekend. So I stay in my room on purpose to be away from him. During the week I have to come home straight after school, making sure to leave my phone on the counter. Dad is so old school. Grounded means...grounded. No phone, no TV, no computer not unless it's for homework. He even makes sure all lights are off by ten, even if I'm not sleepy. However on Wednesday I have to stay over at school to plan our Christmas with the cheer squad and the band and he allows it because it is school related.

Every year we go to houses caroling around the city. Mostly to all the football players' houses and teachers and anyone else that is important to the town. We can't go to every house but still it's our little contribution to the city. Everyone loves it when we go around playing Christmas music and singing bringing cheer into the holidays. Us cheerleaders we sing and do somewhat cheers if that is what you want to call it. This is my forth year doing it at the high school. I'm surprised my dad even let's me do it but since it has been a tradition of the city since like the fifties he agrees to let me do it.

"So even though you are grounded...your dad is going to let you go Saturday night?" asks Sara.

"Yes but I have to go home straight after," I tell her and the other girls that are listening.

"I would hate to have your dad...Ana he has to be like the worst ever." She rolls her eyes. Please as if she has a better life than me.

"Sometimes...he just means well," I tell them as if I am defending him.

"Yeah...whatever," she smirks.

"He does. Yes he is strict but at least he isn't a drunk and likes to hit on me. I mean it could be worse right."

No one says anything. They all know my dad can be a pain in the ass when he wants to be. But not to me, they don't see it but he has never really been mean to me. Except for dragging my ass of a house full of my friends. Ok maybe he can be a little rough at times. I don't say anything back as I think about all the times he has actually been there for me.

We finish up practice and then I head home. Jake and I haven't gotten to spend much time together the past few days either. Between classes and about five minutes after school is all we get. We hold hands and kiss and if it was up to him we would spend the day in the back seat of his car making out.

But I know the school will call my dad saying that I have missed classes so that is not going to happen. I am hoping that we finish a little early on Saturday night so I can spend a few little minutes with him, hell at least long enough to get a major kiss or two you know. We have played around some, believe me when I say we have went far but not all the way. I'm not ready yet and if my dad ever found out he actually might kill me after all.

When I get home he is already there waiting on me. He is in the kitchen cooking. "Hey how everything go today?" He looks me over to make sure I am wearing appropriate clothes. He hates when I come home in my cheer uniform because it shows too much he says. Tonight I have on my sweats so I'm  pretty much covered.

"Fine." I set my backpack on the stool by the bar and walk over to the fridge to get out the pitcher of tea. He hands me a glass.

"Look I know you are still mad about being grounded but I'm only looking out for you." He turns to stir the pot of noodles.

"I know dad but nothing happened." I turn away from him before rolling my eyes. My dad can't stand being disrespected and rolling of the eyes at him is a huge disrespect.

"I don't like you hanging out with them. They are only going to get you into trouble."

I reach up and touch his arm. "And that is why you taught me all these years how to take care of myself. You should have faith in me dad. I can take care of myself."

"I know you can darling, it's just when you put yourself in a situation like that things can get out of control."

"Dad I got this..." I reach up and grab two plates down for us. He puts noodles on the plates and then adds a big spoonful of sauce. We take our plates over to the table and sit down to eat.

"I know you can handle yourself. So what are the plans for Saturday night?"

"The usual; we are meeting up at the school and then going around to all the houses to sing."

"And...what time do you plan on being home?" He takes a bite of his noodles and looks at me.

"Right after of course." I take my fork and twirl noodles around it before holding up to take a bite.

"Good...I will be waiting up for you."

"I know you will. You always are." I give him a fake smile. He always waits on me and if I'm one second late he comes looking for me or calling the whole damn town to see if anyone has seen me.

"I care about my girl. You should be glad that I do."

"I do dad; it's just I'm eighteen and you treat me like a twelve year old," I sigh.

"I hate that you feel that way Katana. Maybe one day you will understand what it's like to have a daughter that you care about."

I debate rolling my eyes at that comment but I don't, instead I take another bite of my noodles and then finish up. I get up and take his plate and put both in the sink.

"I will do the dishes; go get your homework done," he tells me.

I grab my backpack and head to my bedroom. I wish I could play on my phone but one of the rules of being grounded is handing over my phone as soon as I walk in the door and it is sitting on the kitchen counter. So homework it is. I spend the rest of the night working on it and then going to bed.

The next morning I head to school in my car. I am surprised that he didn't take that away however I am only allowed to drive to school and then back home right after. And he will know if I don't due to the tracking device he has on the car. I head on into the building, to see everyone standing in the hallway.

"So you coming over later?" Jake asks me when he pulls me into him by our lockers.

"You know I'm still grounded." I reach up and kiss him on the lips.

"Sneak out...he will think you're in bed sleeping."

"Yeah...right...my dad will know, you know he will, are you trying to get yourself killed."

He smirks, "Your dad may have you wrapped under his finger but he doesn't have me; I'm not scared of him. He is all talk you know...hell Ana...you're freaking eighteen. You need to live a little."

"I am living a little." I laugh and kiss him again. "Why are you dying for me to get in trouble? Don't you know the longer I'm grounded we will never have alone time."

He pushes me into the locker and kisses me hard. I let his tongue invade my mouth. The bell goes off for our next class. "Let's miss...we can go to the locker room."

"I would love that more than anything however you know if I miss, the school will call him." I kiss him again and then push past him.

"Ana...you're killing me here baby."

"I'm sorry baby, look I'm going to try to finish up early tomorrow night and come by your house last alright. We can spend time together then."

"Yeah...alright." I watch as he runs his hand through his hair and he watches me as I leave him standing in the hall.

The next day we all meet up at the school. We load up on the trailer stacked with hay. We have two trailers and a few of us get one with the band while the other girls get on the other. We go down the road and get out and sing. Families come out to greet us and some even sing along. Children prance around the yards and sing just as loud as we do. I love looking at all the Christmas lights and decorations some people really go all out.

We get to Anthony's house and his dad stands in the doorway watching us. I'm sure he is drunk he always is. Anthony comes out and his little brother that is around two. He is running around in-between all of us and I pick him up so that he won't get hurt. Sometimes when the band is playing they don't see the little kids and I would hate for something to happen to him. I dance around with him and sing to him. Poor kid needs a bath but that is beside the point. I start to put him back down so that we can go but he is sleeping; so I carry him to the front porch to hand him off.

Anthony was about to take him when his dad yells at him. "Boy you know he will start crying. I better not hear him start that shit again."

I look at his father and back towards Anthony. Ok someone needs to take this kid because I can't just hold him all night.

"You can go lay him down on his bed; it's in the back room," says Mr. Harper slurring over his words.

I look at him like he can't be serious. He wants me to take him to his bed. I turn back to look at Sara and Bethany. "Guys come in with me," I ask my friends because they are my friends and they should go in with me. My dad has told me several times never go into strangers house but this is Anthony's house so I guess it will be alright.

They both look at Mr. Harper and then shake their heads no. "We...we will wait for you...hurry up," says Sara. Seriously...they are too chicken shit to walk in with me. Why do I have to do everything?

Anthony steps to the side and I walk in against my better judgment. The house is destroyed, super messy. I have never seen anything so disgusting. His mom is sitting on the couch with a cigarette in her mouth and glaring up at me like I should not be there and giving me a go to hell look. There is also an older girl there not much older than me with a huge stomach...too young to be pregnant but I don't say anything. It's not my place to say anything. Both if them look like they haven't showered in days.

His dad walks in behind me and points me to the back room to where I need to take the little boy. He also needs a good scrubbing and he reeks if beer so that for sure doesn't help.

"You better hope that boy doesn't wake up...he's a pain in my ass," he slurs. I think to myself what if he does it's not really my problem now is it. But I look down the hallway and it is only two rooms down. I go against my better judgment and go down the hall. I have to step over toys and trash that is lined along the floor. I notice a few roaches run out and then back under the trash. The only thing on my mind is putting the little boy to bed and getting the hell out of there.

His dad follows me down the hall into the room. I see the bed over next to the wall and I lay his little brother down silently, trying my best not to wake him. As I am bending over the bed I hear the door behind me shut and the click of the door locking.

Every scenario plays in my head. What the hell did I just get myself into? My dad warned me about this type of thing but I am naïve and surely nothing like that would ever happen in a small town like this. I think I just might be wrong.