Screams echoed in her ears and scarlet shades flashed in front of her eyes as she sat curled up on the floor, knees drawn up against her with her body slightly trembling.

The clanging of swords drowned away her heartbeat and it seemed as if nothing around her was real anymore. It seemed as if she had gone back to the dreadful citadel, as if she was trapped once again with no other choice to escape except murder.

Murder...

Just like they had done to Nuriko, to Ryuu and to Kai.

Her hands were clamped tight on her temples, trying desperately to drown out the clamor. But still the noise only got louder and the images flashing through her mind were even more vibrant; the memory of Ryuu's dying moments haunting her endlessly.

"Stay strong," his last words echoed around her, "for me... For Kai..."

A blood curdling scream erupted from her, no matter how hard she tried to suppress it within her. Even though her hand was clamped on her mouth, there seemed no end to the cry of distress raging inside her.

Shortly afterwards, the door burst open and Tim rushed in, not changed out of his uniform yet. "Sayuri!" he knelt down beside her, concern dripping from each feature, "Sayuri, wake up!"

He shook her as if trying to wake her up from the nightmare she was enduring but the tears flowed and the scream died down only when her voice faded to a rasp.

"Onesan," he panicked at her state for her eyes were still tightly shut, tears puring ceaselessly, "onesan, watashi no koega kiko emasuka? Anata wa koko de anzendesu."

"Ryuu... Shinanaide kudasai. Shinanaide kudasai!"

It was the first time Tim had heard that name from her, and judging by her torment he could easily judge that whoever Ryuu was, his death had been traumatic for her. "Dare mo shinimasen, subete ga daijōbu ni narimasu. Watashi o shinjite."

Her eyes fluttered open but it seemed as if she hadn't recovered yet because she was still repeating the last sentence, her voice fading by each word she uttered, "shinanaide kudasai... Shinanaide kudasai... Shinanai..."

Tim was completely panic stricken; he had never before seen her in such a worse state and had no idea how to handle it. In the anxious situation he was stuck in, the only logical thing he could do was to ask someone for help.

And the only person he could think of was Richard Grayson.

He left Sayuri and dialed Dick's number in a haste, hoping desperately for him to pick up.

"Hey Tim, I was just..."

His cheerful voice was interrupted when Tim spoke up, "Sayuri's not well. Hurry."

The call disconnected but he was aware that Dick would already be on his way by then. Not being able to leave his sister alone in such a frenzied condition, he sat down beside her trying his best to comfort her, all the while praying for Richard to come soon.

***

By the time Richard arrived, Sayuri had apparently woken up from her nightmare but was still on edge. She had forced Tim out of the room, threatening him not to dare step inside or else she'd do something they would both regret afterwards.

"What happened?" he spoke soon as he stepped inside the apartment.

Tim's eyes were transfixed on the door which she had locked by then, "she won't let me in. She's in pain, Dick, but she won't let me in."

Distress was evident from his voice and Richard knew that asking him anything further would be to no avail. "Do you have the key to this room?" he demanded.

"Y-yes..."

"Give it to me then."

"But... But she wouldn't... She's angry and she could hurt you if you go in there now."

Richard looked straight in his eyes, trying to make him see sense, "look here, Tim, I'll handle everything, okay? She's not going to hurt anyone. And even if she does, I'll take care of it. Just give me the key."

Taking the key from him, he hastily unlocked the door and stepped inside, however, he was welcomed by a heavy book hitting him straight in the face. He stumbled but gained his balance shortly after, bracing himself for any other objects aimed at him.

Sure enough, quite an assortment of objects followed suit including a pen holder that would have hit him had he not caught it and a flower vase that shattered a few inches away from him.

"Sayuri..." he spoke in a gentle tone to the woman defiantly standing across from him at the end of the room, holding a coffee cup threateningly.

"Get out, Grayson," she warned, "or else I will throw everything I possibly can at you."

"You're trashing your room," he remarked and was so calm that it surprised Tim even.

"I don't care," she threw the cup but he dodged effortlessly, such that it smashed against the wall, "I just want you both to leave me the hell alone."

Tim intervened, "Sayuri, try to understand. We only want to help..."

"I don't need anyone's help!" Her reply cut them short, voice risen to an alarming pitch and eyes struggling in conflict, "just leave me alone."

Tim tried to calm her down, reaching out to take her hand in his, but she pushed him away. Pain flashed across his face as he gave it one more try, "hey... Onesan, anata wa nagaiai hitori de sunde imasu. Otetsudai sa sete kudasai."

"Iya, Tim. Watashi wa dekinai." Tears threatened to streak down her cheeks but she still tried to stand her ground. "Watashi wa dekinai," she repeated the sentence emphasizing on each word.

She wanted them to know that they couldn't cross that boundary with her. She had never let anyone come closer to her in all these years because she feared that the second she let her guards down, the other person could get terribly hurt due to her.

And she didn't want anything hurtful to happen to both of them. Neither Tim, her brother, nor Richard, her best friend.

"Sayuri," Richard spoke up seeing that none of Tim's words had had any effect on her, "I know why you're doing all this. I know exactly why you're pushing us away. And let me tell you, I also know that what you're doing is quite stupid."

She glared at him incredulously though not a single word slipped her mouth.

"It's stupid because in attempts of not letting us get hurt, you are hurting us yourself. Do you really think that we'd be happy to see you burn everything inside you? Do you think we're not getting hurt by all this act you're putting up? Answer me, is this not going to hurt us!"

"Grayson," a tear slipped down her cheek as her face turned scarlet, though the look in her eyes and her voice was just as determined as before, "you know well enough that driving me to guilt is not going to work; I won't answer you. I can't..."

"Then let me answer this for you instead," he had stepped forward and grabbed her by the arms, making her look straight in his blue irises, "it hurts us each time you cry. Every single tear that rolls down your eyes kills me inside. I can't bear to see you like this. Tim can't either. And yet you're being a stubborn idiot, blindly jumping off a cliff even though you're well aware of what lies at the bottom."

Her lips parted as if to say something in reply but her voice seemed to have gone mute.

"And if you think that you're choosing the option which might hurt us less, then that too is rather useless. Our life is just about as certain as the life of a butterfly, Sayuri. One moment we are soaring through the sky, the other moment we might not even be here. Each night I step out of the Bat Cave, I always think that this might be the night that I won't come back. Every single time I go on patrol, there is a lingering feeling that this might probably be the last time I walk through the city. Who are you trying to save by letting yourself disintegrate? I'm already a marked man just like all of us here. I would die when my time comes but if it cost you even a single tear, I won't be able to forgive myself."

Tim was at a loss of what to say as well. He was shaken by the intensity of his words, by the sincere emotion in his voice and the soft yet sorrowful look in his eyes.

Richard truly cared for Sayuri, he could see that as clear as day at that moment. The way he gently wiped away her tears and held her close in a supportive grip indicated his affection towards her.

He was angered at her; absolutely outraged that she had chosen her destruction in order to keep them safe. But still he held her close, trying to get her to share her pain.

"Richard," the determination in Sayuri's voice had dimmed to an almost inaudible whisper, "why do you care so much for me?"

"Because I think I might have fallen in love with you."

She didn't have any strength left to contradict him as she buried herself in his arms, tears starting to pour ceaselessly, "don't... Please don't..."

Tim had absolutely no idea how to react. He simply stood there watching the interaction between the two.

Richard gently stroked her head in an attempt to comfort her, "but why, Sayuri?"

"Because I... I don't deserve you."

***