A/N: Hi everybody! I'm sorry to say, this is another sad one. Just kidding! I'm not sorry muhahahaha! Listen to To Love Someone by Benson Boone.

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Aang POV:

"Alright, good job guys! I think that'll be all for today!" Aang said in a very convincing bright way as he stood up.

The group of Air Acolytes opened their eyes, relaxed smiles strung across their lips. The day's meditation had gone flawlessly, and Aang really was proud of them. 

But he had other things on his mind.

He followed the Acolytes out the door, a chorus of goodbyes and see-you-soons exchanged before they all went their separate ways. Once out of his student's line of sight, Aang's grey eyes grew overcast, making the shadows under his eyes more prominent. He hadn't slept much the night before, even though his days had been full lately and sleep would've been a welcome guest.

He usually loved walking home in the city. His eyes were constantly flickering from one thing to the next. It was so different from his quiet, sheltered life with the monks, he was always seeing things he had never known people could do and he found himself wanting to learn them. 

At the thought of the monks, Aang swallowed hard. It had been one hundred seven years to the day since he had last seen Gyatso and the others, and though for him it was just seven, there didn't feel like much difference. He was making himself sick thinking about it. Even meditating, something he enjoyed, had been hard.

Today walking home wasn't nearly as enjoyable as it usually was. The half hour seemed to stretch into a full one and then another. He was much more tired than he should've been by the time he got home. Aang stood in front of the house for a moment, breathing deeply, determined to come in smiling. He wasn't sure who was going to be home, and go figure, it was everybody. Even Zuko. On the one day he would've preferred to be alone. But in spite of himself, he was excited to see all of his friends in one place. 

Shutting the door behind him, and walking over to Zuko, Aang exclaimed. "Fire Lord Hotman! It been too long!"

Zuko looked at him in exasperation. "Why does this happen every time I see you? Aang, I saw you at a meeting three days ago."

Aang shrugged. "Like I said your fieriness, too long."

Shaking his head, Zuko hugged Aang and if Aang was being honest, it didn't make him feel as much better as he would've thought that it would. After they had broken out of the hug, Aang followed Zuko to where Sokka and Toph were talking about something, loudly and Katara and Suki were sitting next to each other with books on their laps talking quietly and rolling their eyes at Sokka and Toph.  Toph whipped her head over towards Aang before anyone else had seen him.

"Oh good," she said. "you're here. Now this dunderhead can talk somebody else's ears off." she stuck her thumb out towards Sokka. Sokka did not look happy. In fact, he looked the opposite of happy: unhappy. 

"Yeah, ok Toph. Go ahead and insult me! That doesn't mean that everybody else thinks that I talk to much! Right guys?"

The room went quiet.

 "You don't talk too much exactly," Suki said awkwardly. "Just a little more than average."

Sokka was satisfied. "Thank you Suki."

Katara smiled at Aang. "Sweetie come sit with us!" And he wanted to. He really did. But his cheeks were starting to get tired from carrying a painted smile. 

"It's ok!" It was easier to smile at her than any of the rest of them. "I think I'm going to lay down for a bit. No, Sweetie, there's nothing wrong.  I just need a second."

"Ok." She said softly, her demeanor calm but her sapphire eyes tinted with worry. Aang slipped off down the hall and shut himself inside his room. The door clicked shut and he realized he had been holding his breath. He eased himself onto his bed and put his hands over his face. The deep ache that he was always trying to forget about but never left was throbbing in his chest and was slithering it's way up his throat.

One hundred seven years...

A shudder raked his body and the room began to spin. He stood on shaky legs and started pacing the length of his room, honestly just to make absolutely sure that his blood was still flowing. The mechanic steps also gave him something to focus on other than his life before Katara and Sokka. 

Had he ever really wanted to leave them? Had he really? Surely he had intended to come home. All Aang clearly remembered was a thick cloud of dread around those last few days with the monks. How he had finally recognized that the funny glances they had always cast him were expectant ones. 

He hadn't liked it. So he left.

He left all the little things, like everyone waking up early together and making fruit pies and playing air ball with his friends and training with Gyatso.

Oh Spirits, Gyatso.

His first real friend. The closest thing he'd ever had to a parent. Aang couldn't stop images, sharp as knives, from flashing in front of his eyes. Aang's chest constricted. He felt like crying. A blazing fire flashed in his mind and he sat down hard on the bed and buried his head in his hands, his breathing shallow. 

It took a minute, but after stretching out on his bed, Aang managed to calm himself down to some degree. It turned out not to be a good thing. 

Coward, echoed around his mind. Deserter. 

Aang's brow furrowed in pain. Anger at himself began to bubble in his stomach. He was a coward. He was a deserter. What had he done? They had needed him and he'd abandoned them and they died. 

Murderer! His mind screamed.

No! Aang threw his knuckles towards his forehead. I never meant-

You're the reason there ever had to be a "last airbender" Avatar, his mind sang.

"NO!" Aang yelled out loud, his head throbbing.

"Sweetie?" said a gentle voice from just inside his door.

"Katara!" Aang gasped. "I didn't hear you come in." He sat up and tried to pretend that he didn't know that he looked terrible. 

Katara shut the door and came over to sit beside him. "What can I do to help?"

Those six words sent every one of his walls crumbling to dust. The ache in his throat doubled. He slumped over, holding himself up by resting his elbows on his knees. "I left them." He whispered.

Recognition flared in Katara's eyes. "Oh Aang." 

"I left them." He repeated, louder now. "If I had been there, they wouldn't have died."

Katara's eyes widened. "Aang you can't blame yourself like that! You were only twelve-"

Every angry, self-hateful thought that had ran through his head was pouring out his mouth. He didn't even try to stop them. "I might as well have killed them myself."

"Aang!" Katara exclaimed, horrified and angry. "Never say something like that again! There's no guaranteeing that there would've been a different outcome if you had been there! You know that the monks would never want you to get this way!"

"No Katara!" Aang burst out. "I don't know what they would want! I spend all this time with the Air Acolytes, trying to teach them all about my culture, but I can't," His voice broke. "I can't because I don't know everything. I'm afraid of how much has been lost because I didn't pay enough attention in my lessons! It was my responsibility, no, my purpose, to protect them and I failed. Just like I always do." That last sentence seemed to suck every once of energy out of him. He felt Katara's arm on his back and he leaned into her warmth.

Her other arm slipped around him. He wasn't sure why he had ever spent a single second outside of her arms. She held him like she was cared that if she let go even just a little bit, that he would fall to pieces. Just her being there was the glue. She could keep him steady without even trying. 

"I'm sorry." He whispered.

Katara kissed the top of his head. "Nothing to be sorry for, love."

Aang's felt all the anger leave him and love for Katara, his miracle, pour in where it used to be. The grief stayed; he would've been scared if it hadn't. Aang closed his eyes. The monks would always be his past, but he wanted this girl to be his future. 

"I love you so much." Aang told her.

"I love you too Aang." Katara replied, smiling gently. 

He wouldn't say it now, but he wanted to ask her to marry him. But as he had learned through over six years of being together, these sort of things took time. 

He didn't mind.

He would wait.