If She Knew by nabs_xoxo 

Reviewer: winnie_loves_honey 

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Title: [4/5]

While I like the title, I don't see its reference to the book. What is it that the readers wish Amyra knew? This title offers a lot of room for dramatic irony that I wish was in the book.

Cover: [5/5]

I love the cover! It screams mystery/thriller, so I know exactly what kind of book I'm about to read.

Blurb/Synopsis: [3/5]

I like the suspense generated by your blurb with the indication that Amyra's life is in danger. The last sentence before the excerpt is a little confusing as you repeat the word "know". Instead, try to find a synonym to help it flow better. However, it does fit with the title which is nice. As for the excerpt, it doesn't really match the rest of the blurb, so it feels out of place. Perhaps try to choose an excerpt that relates more to Amyra moving in or meeting the detectives. I haven't yet read the book, but the blurb makes it sound like there will be a love triangle between Amyra and the detectives. Yet, when I read it, that doesn't seem to be the case.

Genre: [4/5]

It's definitely a mystery/thriller; however, I'm not sure if it's a young adult as ages or level of education have not been mentioned. To be a young adult, the main characters must be between the ages of 13 and 18.

As well, I don't know if this was intentional, but the book almost reads like a murder mystery comedy to me, which I really like. 

Originality: [10/10]

I think your book is incredibly original. I love the twists and turns created by it being a murder mystery and the familial involvement.

Description: [7/10]

I didn't see much description throughout the book, but you described Amyra's physical appearance well in Chapter Four.

Character Development: [8/10]

I love how you described the family tree in Chapter Two. It makes way for character development later as well as connections to each part of the family throughout the murder mystery.

Amyra

I like how you made Amyra a well-rounded character. She's smart, but she also has moments where she is hysterical which makes complete sense.

Private Investigator Kelvin Xaviers:

You introduce the PI as someone from the detective department of Rome; however, PIs don't tend to work for a specific department in a police station as they don't have the necessary certifications. They can be hired as external staff, but they won't work for a specific department in the station. However, a few sentences later, Uncle Josh claims that he doesn't want to involve the cops, so does Kelvin work for the police or not?

Pappa

Is the name Papa or Pappa? You use both throughout, so it would be better to choose one and stick with it. That way, the reader can always connect back to the father, especially because both names read differently.

Plot [9/10]

Ooh I like the plot twist of Amyra inheriting everything from her deceased father. I especially like how Sierra was nearly suffocated to death (okay, that sounds bad) instead of Amyra simply due to Amyra sleeping in a different room.

Like I stated in the title portion, I wish there was some dramatic irony. If the readers knew something that Amyra didn't know, a lot more suspense could be created.

Overall, I like the plot. It's original with many unexpected twists and turns, and I didn't find any major plot holes.

Grammar: [10/15]

Your grammar is decent, but there are quite a few mistakes such as the capitalization of "uncle" in the blurb. In addition, many sentences are grammatically correct but do not flow well. As an example, in Chapter Two, "'You do not think that I killed my own father!' I yelped,"would flow much better as "'You think I killed my own father?' I exclaimed indignantly."

Occasionally, there are fragments scattered throughout such as "Cry my heart out." in Chapter Two. Remember that sentences must have a subject and a verb to be considered a full thought. As well, there are a few run-ons such as the last sentence of Chapter Four, "Before leaving, I took one glance of my room that I wouldn't be seeing for how long I didn't know."

In Chapter Three, instead of writing "It was 3 am" put "It was three in the morning." This flows better and you lose the accidental confusion between am and a.m. In Chapter Four you write, "8 am in the morning." This is redundant as a.m. and in the morning mean the same thing, so just choose one of them. If you choose a.m., remember that there should be periods after a and m unless you capitalize them as AM.

Structure: [4/5]

In Chapter Two, you write, "The room seemed to spin and fall apart. My whole world had fallen apart actually." The italicized line doesn't seem to be a thought, and having the line appears redundant as you use the same vocabulary. Try changing it up a bit. Similarly, two paragraphs down, you write, "Only to fill it with something more dreadful." This line is a fragment, and it should not be italicized. So throughout, there are many sentences that are italicized that should not be italicized. As a rule of thumb, only italicize thoughts or words that you wish to emphasize.

In Chapter Four, there is one incredibly long paragraph. You can split it up so it's easier to read, and readers won't accidentally skip over it.

Vocabulary/Spelling: [9/10]

I love the vocabulary you use throughout the book such as saying "adjacent" instead of "next to" or "pacing to and fro" rather than "back and front".

However, while I applaud your use of different vocabulary, sometimes it is better to remain simple. For example, in Chapter Two, you write, "Was I losing my senses?". This would resonate more with the reader if you switched it to "mind" instead of "senses".

Overall Enjoyment: [9/10]

I do like the book a lot. I like the premise and the plot; however, the grammar turned me off the book a little. It makes what would be a great book a little hard to read.