Reviewer: Xanatos_Gambit 

SynWorld Chronicles - Synegg

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Title 5/5

It seems like SynWorld is the "infinite worlds" that you talk about in the blurb? Sounds cool to me.

Cover 5/5

I think the cover looks cool... and usually I don't like the covers with a sepia-type look ... but this one works!

Blurb 3/5

Oooooh. I like the concept... this one I haven't heard of before, and I'm a total fantasy nerd! However, that's a *really* long sentence. I suggest breaking this up into 2 or even 3 just so it sounds more clear and concise.

And like you can keep the "A Tale of..." if that's your style but like not necessary — not my personal preference.

Genre 5/5

Definitely a fantasy book which makes me HAPPY.

Originality 10/10

Chapter 2:

Dreams of the day he died. Lol I'm laughing but I feel like I'm not supposed to be. It's unusual, that's why, I promise it's a good thing!

LMFAO THE CHICKEN TALKS. Love it.

PS: you have already got the 10 for originality and I'm still on Chapter 2. I love your description of this world.

Descriptions 9/10

Chapter 1:

Ummmm did he pick the kid up or did they run? How did they get out? I think more description is needed in the first chapter about this fire to make it more interesting.

Chapter 4:

Dang I almost jumped like a horror movie when you described the woman with entrails.

Character Development 10 /10

Literally kills me how Brims deadpans everything. And then how Sera's always like waaait is that true. Reminds me of my older brother with my little brother lol and it's hilarious.

Angie and Chickadee bring all kinds of humor to this story and I'm all here for it. You develop Brims and Sera to be deep characters on a serious note... and then you add in some humor with those characters.

Plot 10/10

Chapter 1:

OOOOH. I love THE VOICE thing at the end.

Chapter 5:

WHY DID BRIMS DIE?!

Chapter 6:

JK I'm better now. Now I'm really getting into this world... and there is the explanation from Brims and his contracts.

Structure 3/5

Personally, I like tiny chapters, and they seem to make more wattpad readers click to the next chapter (or so I've found)... but long chapters are fine too. Whatever is your MO.

Okay... I also recommend you to italicize or bold your flashback scenes. Because keeping them with the same text as the rest of the book is getting confusing. I love flashbacks... but when I can tell that they're actually flashbacks.

Chapter 1:

Okay! First chapter little tidbit here. I would start off with the "Fire! Help!" at the VERY beginning... just bc that's a more exciting start than "Brims woke up to the smell of salt and smoke."

Was "the youth" talking about Brims? Because it could be the kid or him, since we have no idea how old Brims is right now.

Chapter 2:

Honestly, I'd find a way to describe him that doesn't just have himself looking in the mirror. I'm guilty of doing this too with some of my characters, but piling on a bunch of description right out of the gate is kinda boring and cliche.

So for a character's inner monologue, it is easier for readers to distinguish if the inner monologue is in italics or bold or something... not just regular text with "he thought".

Vocab 8/10

There are a couple places where more interesting words can be used... but usually you have unusual words to describe things vividly.

Grammar 11/15

I would have generally a couple of recommendations to make things flow more easily... for example "is weighed up" is an odd phrase (Chapter 1). But your grammar isn't horrendous by any stretch of the means... actually quite impressed.

When people speak it goes: "I said bleh," said Henry. <— Like with the grammar just like that. Orrrr: Henry said, "I said bleh."

You tend to forget capitals and commas.

Don't use "k". That's not what you use in novelllllssss.

Chapter 3:

"Point of difference." What?

Enjoyment 10/10

Clearly this is on my reading list so I'm LOVING IT.

I don't know how you managed to do it... but how you interwove such a complex fantasy world into this story, yet without overwhelming the readers, is absolutely amazing.

Total 89/100

And of course, you always can PM me if you want more details / explanation / more suggestions / plot bunnies... etc! :) Juuuust real quick say you're from the Kannada Script Reviews just bc I get confused sometimes on which reviews I do for which communities! :)