This is my last and final journal. I have a few others, hidden in various places. This one is probably one of the most important ones, considering it will be my last. I am so weak. I am getting sicker every day. I have noticed this big bump within my stomach. She grows inside of me, becoming stronger and more powerful by the minute waiting to come out in a few months. Waiting to see the future that lays ahead of her. I'm only eighteen. I'm scared of what is to become of me, of this child that I carry. I won't let them take you. I can't. I know what they want to do to you.

I tried to hide the pregnancy for the past five months, yet now I am showing so much that I cannot hide it. The old woman, my grandmother, she already knows about it. I believe she played with my cup of tea and found the truth that she was looking for. She tried to tell mother. Mother didn't want to believe it. They had wanted me to mate with Dedrick. Yes, he had the special gift as well. But I have fallen in love with Sonam. It happened so suddenly the night after the ceremony. We escaped to the dark part of the woods. We made love on the old wooden plank floor with the casting shadows of the trees and spirits. Now I sit her on the same old floor waiting for him. He is my everything, my soul mate. We created this little thing that is taking over my body. You are so powerful within me. I swear I can feel you scratching my insides trying to get out of me. I do believe that you are taking every drop of blood from me. That's why I am so sick.

Father has banned me from seeing Sonam. They know he has a power, however he's not a first born and they had chosen Dedrick for me. He was a first born son. As soon as you arrive in this wicked world they will take you from me. I will not be allowed to have anything to do with you. They claim that you are a sin of our religion. They did not choose you; therefore they believe that you will not have the power, the power that they beg for, live for. However, they will keep you, drink from you, taking ever single drop of your blood from you until you are drained and withered. Why? So they can stay young inside just long enough to receive the power form the most elite.

I have found a way out though. I'm running, hiding from the evil ones. They will not take you my love. I sit here in the dark in the moonlight. One arm holding you within my stretched stomach, the other trying to write down my thoughts. I can't remember what today is. I have lost track of the days along with the time. Tears drip and stain these sheets of paper, smearing some of my thought as if they were not real. I am waiting for Sonam, your father. He will know what to do, take us far away from here. He will keep us safe. They all think that he is weak but they are so wrong. If only they knew his true power like I do. Maybe you will have the power. Maybe you will have both of our powers.

A week has past; I am living off the berries in the woods. When it rained, I put out an old cracked bowl that I found in the ditch and let it fill with rainwater. This will have to do for now. I haven't heard from Sonam. Is he not coming? I must believe that he will be here soon. However it feels like it has been way to long, what has happened to my love? Did they get to him first? Did they take him? Or worse, kill him? Surely not. My head is playing dirty tricks on me. I need to calm down and be brave for you.

There are a few houses past the woods. I can see the lights at night. I went to one tonight and broke into an empty one. I know you are starving. I'm trying my love. I brought back a bag of chips, two apples, a loaf of bread and four bottles of water. I know it is not much but it will have to get us by. I also found a lantern to turn on at night and a blanket to keep us warm. I am so sick, little one. I don't believe that I am going to make it. I didn't realize that I had looked so old. I happened to turn around in the house, facing a mirror in the hallway as I was about to leave. There was an old woman standing there. Dark, deep circles around her eyes, and I now resemble a ghost, so pale and fragile. I looked like something has been draining the life out of me, slowly. I made my way back here. Sitting on this cold floor with the blanket wrapped around us, I try to write everything down. This is what keeps me going; I believe we only like about another month or so, so try to hang on and I will too.

The pain is unbearable. You are wanting out of me. I dreamed that you would come earlier than you were supposed to. I am trying to fight back the screams. I can't afford for someone to hear me. We are fighting each other my love. I had tried to push you out, but you will not come. It's like you have a hold of me. Are you drinking my blood? Do you realize what you are doing? My love, you already have the greatest gift of all, you don't need to take all of mine away.

I have been in labor for two long miserable days. I'm dying, my love. I can't go on any longer. I hate to leave you this way. I will find a way for someone to take good care of you. I will. I just crawled out here to the black lilies. They are so pretty, even though they are so dark, like death. The evergreen tree will be here throughout all seasons though. I have dug and dug through the dirt for the past few hours with an old tree limb and my weak fragile fingers now bleed with open blisters. This will be my last page, my love. My last thoughts; I'm sorry. If I could keep you I would name you Asilinn, because you will be a dreamer and see visions of the future just like me. Try to control your power; it is very powerful. You are the love of my life. I hope one day that you will be able to find all the missing pieces to the puzzle of your life. I don't know where your father is, Sonam. I'm sure father had something to do with it or Grandmother, that old gray headed sinister woman. Stay away from her, she wants you. She knows wicked spells and curses and she will drain the life out of you. I am ripping a page out of this journal to leave with you. Whoever finds you, I will make sure they keep you safe. Please forgive me my love, I wish you the best life. I'm sorry that I will not be there to watch you grow. But I will be there to keep you safe, always. You have the gift now; I leave it to you my love, my Asilinn.

The next page was ripped out.

She was my mother. She has always been there. She is the one who is keeping me safe. She pulled me from the car; she needed me to stay alive. I wonder if Sonam is still alive and if so where is he now. Would he know me if he saw me, would I know him just because he is my father. My parents found me and took me in. They had cared for me, making sure that I was safe. How did they find me?

Yes, my life was like a thousand piece puzzle. Some of the pieces were placed together so well while others were missing, lost in limbo somewhere. When I got back home, I put the journal underneath my mattress. I wish for no one to find it. I needed to find out more about her. Why would she think that I wanted her blood? Why would I kill her? Did I kill her? The old woman, she knows. She knows who I am. Isaiah knows who I am. Who else in that eerie town knows?

***

The old woman was there. She sat at the table waiting for me. She called me over to her, "Please sit down my Elita." I was not scared this time, looking around the room for something to stand out, a clue, a sign. Nothing! She looked into the cup, shaking her head, yes.

"We have been looking for you for a long time. Finally your home where you belong."

"Where is Isaiah?" I had asked.

"We don't need him anymore. He showed you the way home. He has done as he was told. Now Elita, I need to see the birthmark."

"I have no plans in showing you. Besides if I am the one, why do you need to see it?"

"I need to see it, show me now or we will look anyway, on our terms Elita." I looked around me. Everyone in the Deli was standing, walking closer to me. I felt smothered, like pollen and these little bees wanting to come in and take a piece of me. Before I knew it I was carried off into a back room. Forced down on a marble slab; the coolness took me by surprise. Several hands grabbing at my shirt, pulling it off to view my back, they all wanted to see the birthmark. Hoping it was the answer that they were looking for. Something sharp pierced the middle of it; I could feel the blood swirl around the edges of the mark. I knew what they were looking for. The past, the future, all the answers in between. The gift.

I forced my head up, looking at all the people in the room, the evil ones. And there in the back, behind all the others he stood looking in like a lost child. He knew what they wanted. He knew what they would do to me. He brought me here. He showed them that I was alive; I was the one. I thought he was my friend. I cried out, "Isaiah, why? Why did you let them find me, why?"

I jumped up out of my skin. I forced the twisted covers off of me, gasping for air. Isaiah, he knew everything. I needed to get away. I jumped out of bed and dressed quickly, running down the stairs and out of the house. The fresh air overwhelmed me.

From behind me, my Grandmother yelled, "Are you alright dear? Another bad dream?"

I shook my head yes and turned to look at her. My throat was dry and hoarse, "I'm going for a walk." I yelled back her and kept walking to the small stream on the other side of the barn.

"Alright, see you in a little while."

The only thing that was on my mind for the moment was Isaiah; why would he do this to me? Did he have something to do with it all and if he did why did he insist on me staying away from the town? Wouldn't he want me to know?