"Tumne pehli baar bhagwan ji se kuch maanga tha isliye unhone sun liya... warna main toh itna bewakoof tha ki unse apni zindagi ko maanga tak nahi." Sameer cupped Naina's face.

"Mere Sameer ke baare mein kuch bolne ka haq nahi hai tumhe." She scrunched her nose at him.

He kissed the tip of her nose, "Par Meri Naina ke baare mein toh bol sakta hun na... I Love You, Naina... pata nahi itni himmat kahan se laati ho tum."

She placed her hands over his palms on her cheeks, "Tumse."

"Lekin mujhse milne se pehle kya karti thi? Dard toh tab bhi hota hoga? Kaise samna karti thi uss dard ka?" He pulled down his hands, taking hers within his hold.

Her eyes clouded, as he felt her wince at some distant memory, "Aisa toh nahi keh sakti ki aadat ho gayi thi... kyonki jab bhi thappad padte the, utni hi taklif hoti thi, har baar dard hota tha... lekin usse alag kuch ho sakta hai yeh kabhi dimaag mein aaya hi nahi... laga hi nahi ki mere paas koi behtar zindagi bhi ho sakti thi... bas sab kuch apne jeevan ka ek hissa lagta tha... jab saare taane aur maar ke baad kamre mein aati thi toh Preeti muskura ke gale laga leti thi... aur mujhe lagta tha yehi dhoop chaon hoti hai sabki zindagi mein... bas raat ko chup chap balcony mein khade hoke taaron mein apni maa ko dhoondti thi... unse poochne ke liye ki mujhe kyon chod ke chali gayi woh... jab dil bhar aata tha toh unse baatein kar leti thi... unke saath dard baant ke dil halka ho jaata tha aur neend aa jaati thi."

He pressed her hands, silently telling her that he was with her now. Searching for his father in the stars was something he had done as well... how similar they both were as they sought solace from the ones who had left them, while the ones who were around, rejected them.

She looked into his eyes intently, "Lekin jab dil ko ahsaas hua ki woh tumhare liye dhadkne laga hai, pyar ki dastak sunayi di, tab laga ki zindagi badalni chahiye."

The pain was back in her eyes, "Aur badal bhi gayi...  ghar pe aur badtar ho gayi... gaon se wapas aane ke baad taiji ka vyavhaar zyada kharaab ho gaya... sundar toh woh pehle bhi nahi maanti thi mujhe lekin wahan se aane ke baad meri shakl surat ko leke unke taane bohot badh gaye... aur unki sakhti bhi... agar cycle mein puncture bhi lagane jaana hota tha toh itne sawaal karti thi... ghar se baahar jaane pe toh jaise curfew laga diya tha unhone... bas school jaana nahi rok paayi iske liye aur chidti thi... ek baar baarish ki wajah se gir gayi thi main... kapdon pe keechad lag gaya... wapas aayi toh taiji aur chachiji bahar hi the... unhone wahin seediyon mein khada karwa ke Pooja didi se mere upar thande paani ki baltiyan dalwa di."

Taiji's words still rung in her ears as she mentioned the incident, "Kahan se aayi hai pata nahi, zamane bharbka keechad leke... Bela, maine kaha tha na yeh ladki daag laga degi khandaan ki izzat pe... dekh le, yeh toh aur chaar kadam aage nikal gayi hai... keechad uchaal diya hamare naam pe... ab isse ghar mein ghusne mat dena... yahin khada karke pehle saaf karwao isse."

"Lekin bhabhiji, yahan sab aate jaate hain... aise kaise... baarish mein phisal gayi toh isme bechari Naina ki kya galti hai... bas thoda pairon pe paani daal ke andar chali jayegi aur naha legi... thand bhi lag rahi hogi bechari ko." Bela had tried to reason.

Taiji gave an angry glare to Bela before giving a look of contempt to Naina, "Aaj baarish mein phisli hai kal iska pair kahin aur phisal jayega... aur tu tab bhi iska saath dena... duniya bhar ki gandgi ko apne ghar mein le jaana."

Bela shuddered at her harsh words, "Aisa kyon keh rahi hain, bhabhiji... bachhi hai hamare ghar ki... uske liye aisi baatein soch bhi kaise sakte hain hum log?"

Taiji adjusted her pallu, "Haan waise iske jaisi shakal pe kiska dhyan jayega... jitni manhoos iski kundali hai utna hi badsurat iska chehra hai."

All the while, Naina had stood shivering in the staircase, holding onto her bag.

Not listening to Bela, taiji had made buckets of water dunked on her before she was allowed to step into the house. Preeti had quickly got a towel to wrap her once taiji was satisfied, but Naina had come down with a fever by evening.

"Naina, tumhari zindagi mein itni kadwahat thi... tum fir bhi hamesha muskurati rehti thi... main toh papaji ko tumse aise baat karte hue dekhta tha school mein toh bohot mushkil se khud ko rokta tha... itna gussa aata tha ki tumse aise kyon baat karte hain... par uss waqt kuch keh nahi sakta tha... sach Naina, agar mujhe pata hota ki tum itna kuch seh rahi ho toh main tabhi tumhe apni baahon mein chupa leta." Sameer was finding it difficult to control the storm that was brewing in him.

Her sad smile pinched him even more, "Tumse pyar toh karti thi, Sameer, par tumhare kareeb aane ka soch bhi nahi sakti thi... taiji ki aisi baaton ke baad toh mujhe kabhi kabhi lagta tha pyar karke bhi galti kar rahi hun."

He was bewildered... what if she hadstopped loving him at that time, because of the taunts she faced at home?

He flinched at the thought itself.

Her eyes turned soft next instant, making his fears melt away, "Lekin fir school jaate hi tumhara chehra nazar aata tha aur mera dil mujhe bataa deta tha ki yeh galti nahi hai... tumhare liye mera pyar masoom aur nirdosh tha... kisi mandir ki ghanti ki tarah, phoolon ki bheeni bheeni khushbu ki tarah, garmi se sookhi zameen pe padne wali baarish ki boondon ki tarah, raat ke andhere ko door karti subah ki roshni ki tarah, chandni mein nahayi raat ki tarah... tum toh mere jalte hue jeevan mein ek thandi hawa ka jhonka ban ke aaye the, Sameer."

His eyes moistened again... she had made him the center of her world and what had he given in return... she was always under the impression that he had not even acknowledged her presence... and all that was his fault. The guilt of not being with her even when his own heart was beating for her, made him lower his head.

"Sameer, main tumhe yeh sab bata rahi hun iska matlab yeh nahi ki tum khud ko doshi manoge... tumhari kya galti hai... tumhe thodi pata tha mere saath kya hota hai ghar mein." She could understand the contrite look.

"Tum kyon bardaasht karti thi, Naina? Kyon nahi ladti thi sabse... jaise main ladta tha apni mummy se?" His voice was desperate.

She took a deep breath, "Tumhari baat alag thi Sameer... ek toh tum ladke ho, upar se paison ka mazboot sahara tha tumhare paas... aur fir nanu, jo mummy se bade the."

He was befuddled.

She nodded, "Main ladki hoke  kisi se kya ladti jab Arjun bhaiya ladke hokar kuch nahi keh paate the... taiji unko bhi bohot sunati thi... par woh zyadatar ghar se bahar rehte the, school ke baad practice ke liye, isliye taiji ko kam hi mauke milte the... par aate jaate paison ka taana toh de hi deti thi... tum soch bhi nahi sakte Sameer, ki yeh kami kaise zindagi ki har khushi ko mita sakti hai... papa ki nazren jhuki hui rehti thi sabke saamne, Arjun bhaiya bat maangne se pehle kai baar toote hue bat ko rassi se baandh ke practice karte the, mere kapde jab tak ghis ke khud hi fatne nahi lagte the tab tak main unhe pehenti thi... hum log kya ladai karte kisi se."

How much he always took all luxuries of his life for granted... his skates, punching bag, video games, guitar, bike... whatever he wanted, he just mentioned to nanu and it was given to him. His wallet was always full. He never thought twice before buying anything... or throwing away some new clothes and games if he didn't like them. And then his anger... he had vent out his  frustrations by getting into fits of anger, breaking things, throwing everything around, shouting at everyone. He was sure Naina had never let the steam out like this... he could not even imagine her spoiling anything, forget about breaking. How did she keep everything bottled up... how did she stay sane amidst all the rancour... how did she handle the resentment...

"Tum bohot mazboot ho, Naina... agar main tumhari jagah hota toh kabka toot jaata." His voice choked up again.

"Tumne bhi itna sab saha hai na, Sameer... sabko apne hisse ki khushi paane ke liye apne hisse ke dard uthane padte hain... tabhi uss khushi ki keemat pata chalti hai." She soothed him again with her words.

"Lekin tumhara dard mere dard se bohot bada hai... mujhe ek baar mummy ki saas ne manhoos kaha tha aur main sab kuch chod ke marne ke liye bike racing karne nikal pada... tumne toh roz roz aisi baatein suni hain." He pursed his lips in the memory of early days in Mumbai.

Naina held his hand within hers, "Par ab sab peeche reh gaya na... toh kyon dukhi ho rahe ho... hum dono ki kismat toh sabse achhi hai jo humein ek doosre ka saath mila."

Again, she had put aside her grief, putting a balm on his wounds. But today was not about him... he wanted her to bring out every painful memory, rid herself of every shred of past suffering, lighten the heaviness of those agonising days.

Taking a deep breath, he gazed into her eyes, "Lekin taiji ke aise kehne pe kitni taklif hoti hogi na tumhe."

She nodded again, "Mann mein yehi sawal aata tha ki kyon paida kiya bhagwan ne mujhe agar meri wajah se sabki zindagi itni mushkil ho gayi hai... kyon mujhe hi maa nahi mili... kyon mere hi papa ke paas har cheez ki kami thi jo unhe itna kadwa bana rahi thi... kyon mere hi bhai ko apna cricket ka sapna poora karne ke liye paise nahi mil paa rahe the... kyon meri wajah se taiji har baar chachaji chachiji ko taane deti thi."

"Aur tum? Tumhara kya, Naina? Tum sabka sochti thi par apne liye nahi... mujhe Phulla bua ne pehli mulaqat mein bataya tha, ki tum khud ko bhool ke sabke liye sochti ho... apni zaroorat ko nazarandaaj kar ke sabke liye kaam karti ho... apne aap ko kho deti ho doosron ke liye... mujhe aaj meri Naina chahiye... har zehar ko nikal do, Naina... har kadwi yaad se bahar le aao khud ko... jo gaanth hai dil mein, usse khul jaane do... jisse mera pyar har jagah jaa sake, tumhare dil ke har kone mein." He shook her shoulders, leaning to look directly into her eyes.

And the control of years broke the dam, making the bitter tears rush out like a gush of rain swelled stream, making all her past miseries intractable for her.

Sameer engulfed her in his arms, letting the tears flow, glad that he was able to cut across the barrier she had built around her memories.

His shirt turned wet on the chest as her body rocked with unstoppable sobs... his own eyes spilling her pain. But his lips were set in a contended curve... the cleansing was complete with her tears washing away the blemishes on her heart and soul.

It was almost after fifteen minutes that her body became lighter.

"I'm so sorry, Naina." His words were hardly audible when he spoke.

But then, she could understand him even when he was silent.

"Tum kyon sorry bol rahe ho?" She moved back to look at him.

He pursed his lips, "Kyonki main tumhe pehle wahan se nahi bacha paya."

She gave a smile... a beatific smile that brightened everything around him... even if it was on a tear stained face... with swollen eyes and red tipped nose.

Bringing both her hands to his face, she wiped his tears, "Tumhi ne toh bachaya... aur itna pyar diya, aatm vishwas diya... jab pyar hua tumse, tabhi se ek nayi himmat aayi thi mujhmein... chahe uss samay mera pyar ek tarfa tha par ussi ne mujhe badal diya tha... main sab kuch bhool kar khush rehne lagi... aisa lagta tha ekdum se saare baadal hat gaye aur sunheri dhoop nikal aayi... khana mile ya na mile, koi farq nahi padta tha kyonki bhook hi nahi lagti thi... na neend aati thi... isliye main subah sabse pehle uth jaati thi aur bhagwan ji se tumhe maangne mandir jaati thi... tumhari wajah se maine muskurana seekha... sapne dekhna seekha... khud ke liye jeene lagi... aur dekho, aaj tumne har gaanth khol ke mujhe har uljhan se bahar nikal liya."

He let out a deep relieved exhale.

Okay, if anyone is feeling that I took too long to describe the pain of Naina's past, I just want to apologize but it was required to give it a proper closure... something she had lived all her life couldn't be dealt with in a few paragraphs...

Hope you don't hate me for this

Next update in the evening