As the light filtered into her room through the flimsy curtains, Naina opened her eyes. It was a beautiful day. She smiled, remembering her date with Sameer. Getting up from the bed, she caught her reflection in the mirror. She went and stood in front of it, looking at herself.

"Mujh mein aisa kya hai jo Sameer mujhse pyaar karta hai?" She observed herself from different angles.

"Sunder toh main hun nahi... taiji hamesha se yehi kehti hai ki mere jaisi shakal wali ladki ki toh shaadi hona bhi mushkil hai... toh phir shakal se to pyaar nahi hua hoga... aur shakal se hona hota to school mein hi ho jaata... wahan to kabhi mujhe aankh utha ke bhi nahi dekha... pakka kuch aur hai... par kya... umm... meri baatein... nahi, meri bewakoofi wali baaton pe kisi ko gussa aa sakta hai par pyaar nahi ho sakta... kya kya bol deti hun main Sameer ke samne... bhagwanji, kisi din woh gussa hi ho jaayega meri badbad se... phir aur kya... haan, usse mera padhai mein achcha hona pasand aaya hoga... haan, haan... yehi hoga... par top to main school mein bhi karti thi.. phir wahan kyon nahi kaha? Phir kya ho sakta hai... Puchu kya Sameer se?"

Since her childhood, Naina had been ridiculed so often by her taiji that it was now set in her mind deeply that she was below average in looks. And she had accepted it, without question. When she fell in love with Sameer, realising that his good looks were able to charm all girls in the school, she suppressed her feelings... sure that Sameer would never fall in love with a girl like her... still her love for him had only grown in two years... she could see the pain behind the mask of carefree attitude... she could see that his anger was not towards others but his own life... there was something that made him bitter... she wanted to soothe him.

And now, she was feeling on top of the world... Sameer's love had changed her life... she felt happy all the time... but will Sameer be a lifelong blessing for her? She shivered... earlier, while leaving Ahmedabad, though she had felt a sense of emptiness at leaving him behind, till that time he had not shown any attachment to her, so she could imagine a life without him,thinking that he would be happy elsewhere... however, now she had got used to his attention, his care, his concern... his love. The thought of living without him not only brought the feeling of emptiness but a feeling of end of life... a feeling of ultimate darkness.

Naina tried to shake herself out of such thoughts and got ready for the day.

Morning went by attending lectures. As the classes got over, Sameer walked out, waiting for Naina in the corridor, while she was held back by Sonia and Komal, who wanted her to explain a tough question to them. It took longer than Naina had expected... by the time she left the room, Sameer was not outside. Expecting him to be in the library, Naina went up. There were a few students but their corner table was vacant. She then went to the canteen. It was highly unlikely that Sameer went to the canteen without her but she still decided to check. He was not there.

"Shayad wapas hostel chala gaya hoga... koi baat nahi... baad mein peeche ground mein to aayega hi", she started walking back to her hostel. Suddenly, a thought struck her.

" Kahin bahar to nahi gaya? Ek baar uski bike check kar leti hun... yahan hai ki nahi. "

She walked to the parking area. When she was about to turn towards the bike stand, her gaze fell on Sameer. He was standing with his hands in pocket, defiance in his shoulders, eyes blazing. A guy stood in front of him, talking... it appeared that he was trying to reason with Sameer, trying to force him for something. Sameer stood watching him in anger. Finally, he shook his head angrily and gestured towards the main gate, probably telling the guy to leave. The person placed his hand on Sameer's shoulder, not willing to give up... but Sameer flipped his hand away. The guy shrugged and walked towards the gate. Sameer kept staring at him angrily.

Naina could not hear what they were talking but she could hear heated voice of Sameer... the other boy was, however, talking in a low tone. Naina didn't hear his voice at all. When he reached the gate, he looked back. And Naina was shocked to see it was one of the boys she had seen the day before, talking to Sameer outside the newspaper office.

She hid behind a pillar as Sameer walked back to his hostel. She didn't want to ask him anything here. It had to wait till they were alone.

In the evening, when Naina reached the spot, Sameer was waiting. He smiled as she approached him.

"Aaj bohot der kar di aane mein", he gestured her to sit.

" Haan, kuch kaam kar rahi thi", she answered.

"Tum kahan chale gaye the? Maine library aur canteen mein bhi dekha", Naina didn't say anything about seeing him.

" Woh main... main wapas apne room mein chala gaya tha... thak gaya tha", Sameer lied.

It was time for confrontation.

"Sameer... maine tumhe dekha tha... parking mein... usi ladke ke saath jo kal bhi tumhe mila tha newspaper office ke bahar... kaun hai wo Sameer? " Naina tried to be very gentle.

Sameer looked at her sharply... a strange look passed in his eyes... and he lowered his head.

Naina wanted to know, "Bolo na, kaun tha woh? Kuch aisa hai jo tumhe pareshaan kar raha hai... main janna chahti hun woh kya hai".

Sameer sat motionless for a few minutes. Naina waited patiently.

Then he got up abruptly and took a few steps to stand away from her... dipping his hands in pocket.

When he did not utter anything for some more time, Naina prodded again, in a still softer tone, " Sameer... "

He took a long breath. Without turning around, he started, "Naina, main tumhe kuch batane jaa raha hun... please mujhse nafrat mat karna... tumhe achcha nahi lagega... par main tumse aur nahi chupa sakta... "

Her heart sank...

Sameer's voice was low, almost inaudible, " Nanu ke jaane ke baad main bohot dukhi tha... mujhe kuch samajh nahi aa raha tha... duniya mein sirf wohi the jinhone mujhe hamesha pyaar diya... aur woh achanak chale gaye... mujhe laga meri duniya khatam ho gayi... phir Munna Pandit ne mujhe sambhala... mujhe laga ki shayad dost aur pyaar kaafi hoga meri zindagi ke liye... par phir mummy ki saas ki baaton se pata chala ki meri zindagi doosre logon ke liye kitni bhaari ho sakti hai. "

Naina was listening with bated breath. His voice was wrenching her heart... but she did not stop him... she wanted to know what was tormenting him to this extent.

Sameer's voice was now choked with emotion, "Unhone kaha... mummy se... ki main... main... manhoos hun... main jisko bhi pyaar karta hun woh chale jaate hain, hamesha ke liye... pehle mere papa, phir mummy, phir nanu... main dar gaya, Naina... bohot dar gaya... main nahi chahta tha ki meri wajah se aur koi bhi chala jaaye... hamesha ke liye... isliye main sab kuch chod ke yahan aa gaya... pyar, dosti... sabko khud se bachaane ke liye...", he paused.

Naina slapped her hand on her open mouth. She could not believe Sameer had such thoughts about himself. Her voice was drowning in his agony, " Tum aise kaise..."

Sameer interrupted her, "Mujhe kehne do Naina, aaj main sab batana chahta hun tumhe"

Baring it all was not easy for him, but Naina had the right to know, she had to know what he had done... he took a deep breath and carried on, " yahan mujhe kuch ladke mile... woh mujhe ek jagah leke gaye... jahan kal hum gaye the office mein... uske bilkul peeche ek purana bridge hai... wahan kuch ladke competition karte hain... bike racing ka... mere paas bike thi... main bhi uska part ban gaya... college se gaayab rehne laga... kisiko nahi pata tha ki main kahan jaata hun..."

Naina's brows furrowed, "Bike racing? "

"Haan... par yeh alag type ki thi... do bikes ko bohot tez speed pe kuch door jaana hota hai... bohot tez jaate hain aur finish line se pehle takrate hain... aur ek bike ko doosre ko girana hota hai... chot lagti hai... zyaada bhi lagti hai... mujhe bataya tha ki do baar... umm... do ladke... woh bach nahi paaye... "

Naina gasped...

Sameer, aware of the effect it had on her, continued, "Jo jeet jaata tha usse paise milte the... tumne jin ladko ko mujhse baat karte dekha woh ye race karwate hain... woh riders pe bet lagwate the aur paise kamate the... ".

The confusion on Naina's face had deepened now, " Sameer, tum paison ke liye yeh sab kar rahe the? Par tum toh... "

"Nahi, nahi... mujhe paise nahi chahiye the... main to saare jite hue paise un ladko ko hi de deta tha... isiliye woh ab baar baar aakar mujhe phir se racing ke liye bulate hain, kyonki mere jeetne pe unhe double paise milte the, mere share ke bhi... par maine jaane se mana kar diya".

Naina could not see the reason for him to undertake such a dangerous activity, " Tum kyun jaate they wahan, Sameer? "

He swallowed the lump in his throat, "Naina... main jeena nahi chahta tha... mere paas kuch nahi bacha tha... koi nahi... jo the, unhe main nuksaan nahi pohochana chahta tha... isliye main bina kisi dar ke bike chalata tha... kuch hone ka khyaal bina kiye... main khud ko khatam karne ke liye aisa karta tha, Naina", tears were flowing freely from his eyes.

Naina was next to him in an instant... she put one arm on his hand and turned him towards her... looking at his face wet with tears... her own eyes overflowing...

And she wrapped him in a tight hug.

Burying her face in his chest, she tightened her hands on his back.

Sameer was overcome with emotions... he slowly lifted his hands and brought them around her, finding solace at last.

They both stood for a long time, letting the tears wash out the pain, gaining strength from each other's warmth.

Slowly, Naina took a step back... her arms still around him... looking up at his face, " I Love You Sameer ", she smiled through her tears.

Sameer gaped at her, mesmerized... and then pulled her back in his arms... crushing her... but still being soft.

He was at peace... the bitterness he held inside had finally been washed away... Naina had accepted him... in spite of his mistakes. She had given him the heaven of her embrace... she had given him love...

Sameer could not ask for anything more from God! Today, he got everything.

Later, as they sat against the tree, their hands entwined, Sameer saw that Naina's eyes were again brimming with tears. He knew that the shock of what he had told her was still not completely gone.

He placed a finger under her chin and turned her face. Looking into her eyes, he softly assured, " Tumhaara saath milne ke baad main waha kabhi nahi gaya... aur ab kabhi jaunga bhi nahi... tumne mujhe nayi zindagi di hai Naina... jab tumne mujhe apne liye lucky mana... main tab jaake samjha ki main aur tum... hum khush reh sakte hain... ek doosre ke saath... main tumhaaare liye manhoos nahi hun... lucky hun... haina? "

Naina gave a wide smile, nodding, while the tears spilled over her cheeks... but they were the tears of elation, of pride... for him... for how he had been able to pull himself up from the gloom that had surrounded him.

Still, something at the back of her mind remained unsolved. She wanted some more answers. Holding his palm in both her hands, she hesitantly started, " Kuch aur puchu to bataoge? "

Sameer wondered what she wanted to know now. He pursed his lips and nodded.

"Yeh sab to nanaji ke jaane ke baad hua... par maine tumhe school mein bhi dekha tha... tumhari ankhen tab bhi udaas rehti thi... kuch to tha jo tumhe tab bhi dard deta tha... woh kya tha, Sameer? "

He was stunned. This girl had observed him so keenly... he had never made an eye contact with her in school and still she had read his eyes.

"Naina, tumhe kaise pata chala? School mein hamari kabhi baat nahi hui phir bhi tumne kaise dekh liya... jo kisi ko nahi dikha? "

She lowered her eyes... unable to tell him that she had been in love since then... she had lost her heart to him when she almost collided with him... it was love at first sight for her.

"Bas pata chal gaya... tum batao na", she tried to bring back the conversation to him.

He was aware that she loved him since then... though they had never talked about it... but she could feel for him to this extent even then, was overwhelming for him. He suddenly wanted to tell her about all his insecurities.

" Main jab bohot chota tha, mere papa ka accident ho gaya... aur woh hamein chod ke chale gaye... main aur mummy nanaji ke saath rehne lage. Phir do saal baad, nanaji ne meri mummy ki shaadi karwa di, Mr Somani se... main khush tha ki mujhe phir se papa mil jaayenge. Shaadi ke baad main mummy ke saath Delhi chala gaya... wahan Mr Somani ka beta Rohan aur uski dadi bhi the. Dadi mujhe bilkul pasand nahi karti thi, Rohan meri age ka hi tha par dadi usse mere paas nahi aane deti thi. Ek mahine baad hi mummy aur papa mujhe leke Nainital gaye... mujhe laga ki hum ghumne jaa rahe hain... par unhone mujhe wahan hostel mein daal diya." He shuddered at the memories.

Naina squeezed his hand.

He looked down at their joined hands, and continued, "Main bohot roya... par woh log mujhe chod ke chale gaye... mujhe wahan bilkul achcha nahi lagta tha... raat ko dar lagta tha... doosre ladke chidate the mujhe... phir dheere dheere maine khud ko sakht bana liya... sab mujhse darne lage... mera koi kareebi dost nahi tha. Kuch saalon mein mere dost bane, par woh sab mere paison ki wajah se the... main canteen mein khilata tha, bahar ghoomne jaate to unpe kharcha karta tha... apne matlab ke liye the woh mere saath. Phir ek din jab Principal ne hamein cigarette peete hue pakda to... "

"Tum cigarette peete ho? " Naina's shocked voice interrupted him.

He sheepishly smiled and shook his head, "Nahi... bas Nainital mein do teen baar pee thi... uske baad nahi. Un ladkon ne kaha ki main zabardasti unhe pila raha tha... aur Principal ne kaha main apni mummy ko bulao...baat karne ke liye. Main gusse mein bhaag kar Ahmedabad aa gaya... nanu ke paas. Maine wapas jaane se mana kar diya... mummy aur Mr Somani bohot naraz hue par nanu ne mera saath diya. Aage to tumhe pata hi hai... school mein tumhare saath tha. Main hamesha maa ke pyaar ke liye tarsa hun, Naina. Mujhe gussa aata tha unpe... kaise woh apne bete ko chod ke chali gayi... doosre bacchon ko itna pyaar, aur apne bete ke liye waqt bhi nahi tha unke pass... bas chahti thi ki main achche marks lata rahu... kuch shikayat na aaye meri... warna sab bigda hua ladka kehte the. "

His voice choked.

Naina was pained to know how much he craved for his mother, "Maa to hamesha apne bacchon se pyaar karti hai, Sameer. Tumhari maa bhi tumhe tumhare hisse ka pyaar zaroor dengi, dekhna", she said wistfully.

Sameer was, however, not as bitter anymore. Naina's love had given him the comfort he had been craving for. He placed his hand on hers, that were holding his other hand and felt the lightness in his heart.