Lilac didn't know how long she cried and why she was crying so much, all she knew is; having Kio with her made her cry harder. She never showed anyone how sad she had been about her unrequited feelings for Asher, it has always been just her, crying silently.

It was her fault anyway, she tends to deny how deep her infatuation had become—to other people and even herself. She bet even the members don't take her feelings for the guy that seriously, and she used to think the same as well.

"I'm sorry," she whispered before taking a step back. She gazed at the wet patch on Ki-Ryeong's coat and tried rubbing it off, as if it will just dry up that way.

"Stupid, that won't do anything," Kio held her hand and brought it down her side. "It's fine, you should take a seat."

Looking around, she found out that they're back in the veranda where they were earlier with their friends. This time though, Kio pulled her towards the deck where a lone wooden bench stood with only a dim lamp post illuminating the small area.

She took the seat just like he instructed, and he followed suit, sitting beside her. Only the sounds of the slow waves of the river beneath them, and the rustling of trees caused by the winter wind were heard for a long while. The comfortable silence made her look up the night sky. Because the firework show had long finished, the stars greeted her once again.

"He still loves her," she eventually decided to break the silence. Those four words were like an anticipated stab through her heart. Though she already expected it was coming, it doesn't mean it hurts less.

"I'm sorry, I didn't—"

"Come on, it's not your fault! Stop saying sorry," she chuckled a bit, facing him. She met Kio's disapproving stare and shook her head, "stop feeling sorry for me, I'm fine. I also didn't know why I cried so much, to be honest. I should've known this will happen."

"You were trying to confess to the boy you love, but suddenly his ex appeared out of nowhere and stole his attention. Of course, you'll cry."

She rolled her eyes and scoffed, "wow, thank you for reminding me." Her companion only shrugged. "I mean... you're probably right, this is more about my frustration of not being able to confess. I also deeply regret wasting my chance years ago. If only I had the courage and told him about my feelings sooner, then I could've been the girl he fell in love with. We should have been together by now."

"You know it doesn't go that way, right?" Ki-Ryeong looked up the starry sky, leaning back the bench. She did the same and made herself comfortable. "Even though you're the first to enter his life, if it's not meant to be then it won't happen. Say, you really did confess back then, but there are other things to consider as well—career, age, compatibility..."

"You're right," she sighed, closing her eyes, and just listened to the boy's soothing voice.

"For me, this is actually better. I meant... you telling him about you feelings at this age and with the current situation of your career. You said it yourself, you were immature and still insecure that time. Remember what you told me about loving myself? Well, let me say it back to you. It's better to love yourself first before loving another, so you won't ruin yourself in the process."

"Right..." she took a deep breath. "And you know what?"

"Hmm?"

"After I've cried everything out, it doesn't actually affect me that much anymore. Yes, it was painful seeing him still having feelings for his ex, but I'm more hurt with the fact that I might have looked so stupid standing there. If you didn't arrive and pull me away, I would have looked like a lost idiot while the two go all lovey dovey, not caring about the other person who's with them... ugh!"

Kio laughed, causing their seat to shake a bit. "See? You were more worried about yourself, that's because you prioritize your well-being first before anyone else."

"It was actually the first time I cried in front of someone because of that guy. Even back then, when I first found out he's dating Eunjung, I held my tears back when I'm with the members. I always make sure I won't ever let myself be in such a pitiful position. I'm just prideful like that. But what happened just..."

"I understand."

They went back to being silent once again. She absentmindedly checked the time on her phone and saw it's already past 1AM.

She smiled, "I always see this nowadays."

"See what?"

She brought her phone up and showed him the time. The guy was confused at first, but his expression suddenly changed.

"1:09AM," she further explained. "I always see that time nowadays, maybe they're my lucky numbers?" She tilted her head in curiosity, noticing that her companion still has that vacant look masking his face.

"Maybe it's just a coincidence," he finally replied, looking away. "So what are you planning to do now?"

"Go on with my life, I guess?"

Kio nodded, "that's good, don't let what happened affect you that much. You can always... try again."

"I don't know," she sighed, "I should probably just go back on waiting for him to move on, like usual. Eunjung is his first love so it's understandable."

"You're really confident, huh?"

"Life tends to fuck us up so in return, we should face it with confidence and not let it always get its way." She smiled at the boy and that's how their eventful night ended.

•.°⏳•°.

Just like what she said to Ki-Ryeong, her life went on like usual. She can't let a failed confession stop her from getting richer, of course. The first week of January, she had to focus on the start of their dome tour in Japan. Then by the second week, she flew to China to attend the press conference of the idol survival show she's mentoring in, and to shoot the first episodes right after. 

It felt like comeback season again. She almost had no time to rest, and would only last half an hour chatting with her members at night, before her body finally gives in.

There are times her '97-line friends check up on her, but they only exchange short messages before one has to go. Soonho—who she frequently talked to in the past—is busy as well for their upcoming mini album, so they were only able to chat once. It was the same for Kio, though unlike the former, her newfound friend still had time to talk to her every night.

From: Ahn Ki-Ryeong
You're coming back tomorrow?

To: Ahn Ki-Ryeong
Yup! Then I had to go back here again, the last week of January or early next month.

From: Ahn Ki-Ryeong
Such a hassle. Why don't you just stay there?

To: Ahn Ki-Ryeong
We still have one final dome concert in Japan, I need to rehearse.

From: Ahn Ki-Ryeong
Christ, that's exhausting.

To: Ahn Ki-Ryeong
You have experienced worse, you don't have the right to talk. How's the preparation for the comeback?

From: Ahn Ki-Ryeong
The usual. Though the choreography is extra hard this time, even Hei-won said so.

To: Ahn Ki-Ryeong
I wanna see :(

From: Ahn Ki-Ryeong
You're back in Seoul tomorrow, maybe we can hangout some time. I'll bring you to practice, too.

To: Ahn Ki-Ryeong
Am I even allowed to do that?

From: Ahn Ki-Ryeong
Well, it's your company who's strict, not mine. So it's probably you who should ask for permission.

To: Ahn Ki-Ryeong
LOL right.

She can't deny her growing closeness with the guy. It was weird sometimes, whenever she was reminded of how they were in the past. But her line of thought would switch to everything that happened leading them to having this friendship, and it would actually make sense.

They have seen each other during their most vulnerable moments, and what else can best build trust between two people but vulnerability and secrets, right? She knew something about Kio that only her and another person knows, and nowadays, she also finds herself telling him stuff that she had never told even the members.

It wasn't a big secret or anything super dramatic like his, but just some trivial matters; like her complaints about some of the members of the Chinese production team, or how she misses tteokbokki, kimchi and other Korean side dishes. 

Ever since, she prefers not telling these things to the girls so they won't be worried, but these days, she's grateful for having someone to pour her frustrations and longings to, and that's Ki-Ryeong.

Was it because she never really cared how the guy thinks of her? Or was it because of the comforting replies she would always receive from him? Many times had he told her words she never knew she needed. It almost felt like he always knew the right words to say to pacify her. 

It felt like he already have known her for so long. 

Now, she doesn't even want to imagine losing a friend like him.

She went back to Seoul the next morning, as scheduled. Instead of her apartment, the four of them decided to stay in their old dorm until the upcoming concert, so it will be easier for them to go to rehearsals and recordings.

Lilac slept all day and night due to exhaustion, and woke up the next morning with Reiko banging on her door.

"Li, wake up! Wake up! Oh my gosh, you need to wake up!" the girl was already yelling in English and that's not a good sign.

She groggily sat up and rubbed the sleep away her eyes. Without bothering to fix her hair and shirt, she opened the door for her panicking best friend, only to be greeted by the older members as well.

"You are so dead, Lilac!" Jada shook her head, entering her bedroom.

"What?," she lazily asked.

What's the problem? It's so early!

Seo-mi brought her phone up her face, blinding her momentarily. Only when she was able to adjust her vision, and her brain finally decided to do its job... did the dread sink in.

Infamous K-Media News Outlet Unexpectedly Reveals Dating Photos of Global Superstars, Kio (RAVN) and Lilac (K4RMA)!

Ahn Ki-Ryeong of RAVN and Lilac Ayutthaya of K4RMA Photographed Together while Leaving a Fitness Gym in Itaewon

Global Idols Kio (RAVN) and Lilac (K4RMA) Rumored to be Dating After IdolOne Media Released Photos

For idols, dating is considered a scandal. It's considered as something that could potentially ruin their career, but there's actually something worse than that. What could be worse than a dating scandal? A dating scandal with the wrong person and solid evidences. Though at the back of Lilac's mind, a shocking thought emerged;

But at least, it's Ki-Ryeong.