I rolled over and pulled the light blanket tightly to my chest. As I rolled onto the cold side of the mattress, I was startled awake.

I was alone.

In a bed with cold sheets.

My eyes were sore and dried out and my nose was stuffy. I must have fallen asleep crying last night... I try to remember going to bed but all I could remember was being out at Fletch's grave drinking a bottle of whiskey.

I slowly sit up, dropping the blanket and I look around the room. The sun was coming in through the window and for a second as I watched out the window, it looked peaceful.

"Sasha?" Ahren's voice comes from outside of the room.

I rub my eyes and get up, opening the door for him.

His eyes were puffy and he had big dark circles under them. I take it he didn't sleep much last night...

"Everyone is downstairs... we're uh trying to come up with a plan..." He says, stuffing his hands into his pockets.

I follow him downstairs but we don't say anything to each other. The others were gathered in the lobby of the bed and breakfast.

My head was starting to pound and I could feel the hangover setting in. I had no idea how much I'd drank last night but it felt safe to assume I finished another bottle of whiskey seeing as I didn't see it this morning...

We all sat around quietly, no one quite sure what to say. We'd lost people before, hell we'd even lost our home and who knows how many people we lost when that happened, but this still seemed to hit harder for all of us.

I'd lost my best friend... Fletch had been there for me when no one else was. When I had no one but myself to count on, he always stepped up. He was always there.

I'd lost Jasper but Fletch had helped me through that too...

I'd been watching my hands, fidgeting with them. I looked up and my eyes landed on Luna. She'd been with Fletch for a long time, way longer than me. He'd been there for her when she lost Vega... And who knows what else he'd helped her through. After all the time they would have spent together, I can only imagine how much he could have meant to her.

We couldn't keep going like this. We couldn't just sit here and suffer anymore. I was in no shape to try and lead us out of this but I'd done it before.

I still had Ahren who had been with me since day 1. We might fight and disagree with each other but we have a common goal, keep everyone safe. We only want what we think is best for everyone. And no matter what, we're always there for each other.

"Idaho." I start quietly, instantly choking on my words. "Idaho is still the plan."

That wasn't going to change. If Graham had gotten out of the station, that's where he would go. And Jasper would have gone there too.

We would keep heading for Idaho. If I was ever going to see them again, it would be there.

Frankie speaks up, "Mike's group... do we just leave them?"

I take a deep breath as I think about it. They had no idea what had happened. They didn't even know if any of us were still alive. We were supposed to go back to their camp today...

It didn't feel right without Mike or Scott but it didn't feel right just to keep going either. They deserved to know what had happened. Mike had given his life to make sure I got my people out safely. Scott had died trying to save my people.

Maybe I owed them the same thing...

"Mike and Scott both died helping us get our group back together... They died to save us. Maybe we owe them to save their people." I suggest and Frankie nods.

"Fletch would have wanted us to help them." Luna says quietly, barely above a whisper.

She didn't talk much to begin with, and now she'd lost everyone she'd been with before she met us... Her brother, her best friend, her family...

Everyone nods in agreement and we finish devising a plan. It's a slow process, everyone emotionally and physically drained from what we'd been through.

"We go back to this camp you guys were at, and we tell them about Idaho. Whoever wants to join us is welcome but everyone can decide for themselves. We leave the day after we get there, waste no time."

Again, everyone nods in agreement.

We had our plan and with that in mind we got our shit together and made way for Mike's camp. I'd grabbed the last bottle of whiskey I could find in the kitchen and tucked it into my bag before we left.

We hadn't been walking for long when I noticed Luna had put on Fletch's jacket. The dark gray bomber jacket I'd seen him in a thousand times was now dawned preciously over Luna's much smaller body. The sleeves had been rolled up to her elbows and the shoulders were clearly much wider on her than they had been on Fletch. It hung low on her as well but despite all of that, it was exactly where it was supposed to be.

"He'd be happy to see you wearing it." I say to Luna and softly stroke the sleeve of the jacket.

She shrugs, pulling it on her tighter and doesn't say anything.

I sigh heavily. I won't lie, it was hard to look at her in it. Each time, I swore I was going to see Fletch's face but I never did. I wanted him back. I just wanted to see his face again. And I didn't want to see the fear in his eyes right before he died... The way he cried for me to help him, saying he was scared but there was nothing I could do.

The last look I'd seen on his face, one of pain and fear. He was hurting so much and he was scared. He just wanted to be safe. I couldn't do anything. I watched him bleed out on the table in front of me. I tried desperately to save him but it was no good.

I blink fast, trying to make the tears go away before they could fall but it was no good. I quickly wipe my cheeks and stare blankly ahead.

Idaho.

I tried to focus on the future. But it was harder without Fletch to remind me...

"Sasha?" Ahren's hand falls onto my shoulder and he stops me from walking.

I take a deep breath. "I'm okay."

He nods. "I know you are. Just keep breathing. We'll be to this camp soon according to Frankie..."

I nod back and we start walking again.

The rest of the walk wasn't any easier but we made it to the camp soon, just as Frankie had said. I hid myself among the others as eyes fell onto us, waiting for answers I didn't want to give.

Frankie looked to me as I cowered, hoping someone else would say something. But no one did. Frankie stood there dumbfounded, unable to find the right words. Unable to find any words.

Denise stepped towards us, her hands shaking as she twiddled her fingers nervously. "Mike...? Scott...?"

Frankie shook her head, looking at her feet.

Denise stumbled for a second and Laney ran forward to help her balance. "Come on, let's go sit. Sasha will tell us what happened..." She gestured towards me and I hesitated for a minute before reluctantly following.

Ahri hurried next to me, grabbing my hand and squeezing. I wasn't alone. None of us were.

I sat down with Laney and Denise. Denise's eyes were filled with tears. Laney spoke softly, "She's been sweet on Mike since Scott brought her here..."

"What- what happened...?" Denise asked. Her eyes met mine and I fought the urge to look away. I reached across the table and grabbed her hands...

"Mike sacrificed himself on the way out... We were being chased and there were too many of them if they caught up to us. He took my gun and shoved all of us out, I tried to get him to come with but he knew we wouldn't be able to stay away from that many of them..."

The tears started falling down her cheeks and I stopped talking. "I'm so sorry..."

She nodded. "He was always such a kind man. So worried about others..."

"Mike was nice to me the moment we met, he took care of my girl when I couldn't, he deserved to live."

"Yeah, he did. E-excuse me..." Denise tears her hands from mine and storms off.

Laney sighs, leaning over the table. "Did you get your people at least?"

My mind blanks for a second and then I see it all over again. My arms draw heavy and it's as if I can feel his limp body on mine, the blood quickly starting to leave his body and cover me, his eyes shutting, everything is so real.

I try shake my head and clear the feeling but it doesn't work. I start to feel lightheaded and as if I'm getting farther and farther from Laney. I sit there staring blankly ahead of me, waiting for anything but the feeling just grows heavier.

"Sasha,"

I suddenly feel a hand on mine and my eyes shoot up to see Ahri's gentle looking face. She's holding my hands in hers, rubbing circles with her thumb to calm me down.

I take a deep breath and nod slowly.

"We lost one of our people... he bled out after being shot by their leader..." Once I say it, the memory starts to feel a little less real.

Laney sighs heavily. "I'm sorry. I wish this would have worked out better for all of us... If you don't mind my asking, what happened to Scott?"

"He got shot down by a bunch of Delucan's men."

She just nods, silent for a moment. "I should go check on Denise. She really cared about Mike..."

With that Laney walks away leaving me and Ahri. I sit there quietly, thinking back on the past few days. I'd drank myself into oblivion after failing to save Fletch's life. I couldn't handle the pain, it was too much for me.

I was weak.

Ahri sits down beside me. "Sasha," she starts and I'm unprepared for what she has to stay.

"You're the leader. Not Ahren, not Frankie, and not Luna. You. You can't give up on that. Fletch would have wanted you to lead. We all need you but we are all here. Together. After everything we've gone through, you, me, and Ahren, we've got each other. That will never change. But... I need you to pull it together. I can't watch you do this to yourself. I've seen it happen too many times..."

As the words left her mouth, I studied them carefully. When had she grown up? How had I missed the young woman sitting in front of me? She was barely a child anymore... She might have only been thirteen, roughly, but she had matured so much.

"Don't let someone else take you down again. You're stronger than that."

I nod, feeling lighter and lighter by the second. She was right. I couldn't let someone else take me down again. Graham, Cat, Jasper, Fletch... I needed to be done. They weren't here but I was.

"I love you. You're the closest thing to a mother I've ever known and I wouldn't be here without you. Remember that."

If I hadn't cried all my tears over Fletch, I'd have started balling in front of her. But I couldn't cry anymore.

For years I'd been fighting for her. I'd been trying to raise her like my own, and to me she was. She was my family, had been since before the dead walking.

"I love you too. I've only ever wanted to raise you like my own..."

That was exactly what I was going to do. I needed to keep going for her. She'd watched me fall apart too many times and she was right, Fletch would have wanted me to lead. He would have wanted me to keep going stronger.

Stronger for myself.