What she wanted
more than anything
was to be loved
completely
by somebody
with eyes
that saw
all of her
and not just
what they wanted to see

~Mark Anthony

"So...."

"So...?"

"Soooooo?"

"Suga, I can't read your mind, you're gonna have to give me more than just 'so'."

Said roommate couldn't contain his excitement any longer, "So tell me how it went!" Suga involuntarily skipped several steps in his haste and had to catch his balance before continuing, "I'm guessing since we didn't hear from you the rest of the evening, you guys hit it off, but enquiring minds want to know the details."

Daichi only huffed and silently stooped to pick up the volleyball Suga had let slip when he tripped, "I didn't think you wanted anything to do with it, remember?" It was a lame excuse of a diversion, which he knew Suga wouldn't fall for, but the few extra seconds would be enough time to figure out how much he wanted to share. How much he would admit to. Farther ahead, Kuroo was already on the court warming up with Asahi, yelling towards him and Suga to hurry up.

"Au contraire," Suga scolded, simultaneously waving off another protest from Kuroo, "I said I didn't want anything to do with that stupid bet you guys made. But I don't think this is about that anymore, right?"

Damn. This was the problem with knowing someone for so long, they saw right through all the bullshit. Daichi had thought he'd done at least a decent job keeping to himself that bubbling joy he had felt spark after last weekend. But his best friend must have spotted something, because there was a genuinely happy glint in his eyes as he silently implored Daichi to spill.

Daichi knew it, and clearly so did Suga. Something had felt different about spending time with Jun. Unlike all his previously failed dates, Daichi hadn't been
hopelessly bored with Jun. He hadn't been counting the minutes until the date was over with her, but rather lost track of them altogether. While Jun wasn't the social butterfly that normally would gravitate to him, or maybe it was because she wasn't, their conversation that evening had felt more meaningful. And had left him wanting more. Daichi tried to convince himself it was all for the bet, which technically hadn't been called off; that these strong feelings had manifested as a result of his desire to prove Kuroo wrong. Because damn did he really want to rub it in that guy's face. But he somehow couldn't even fully convince himself anymore that that was the truth. Not after slipping a note under Jun's door once he'd dropped her off, and catching himself uncharacteristically elated when his phone chirped a few moments later with her number. There was something else going on, and while he was starting to recognize it for what it might be, it didn't necessarily mean he was ready to show it just yet.

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"Really? Cuz your red face says otherwise."

"Stop that!" Daichi batted away Suga's hand that prodded at his cheek. "It's nothing, she's just some girl that I had to convince I was interested in, alright? That's all." The words tasted like bile even as he spoke them with a matching bitterness, but he had to be harsh to be convincing, otherwise he'd never believe it either.

Not at all surprised his friend continued to dodge his pushing, Suga gave Daichi one final questioning glare to let him know he wasn't convinced, and then let the topic drop in favor of starting their game of volleyball. While Daichi seemed relieved and focused instead on putting all his energy into the game, Suga's mind was already plotting ways to get his thick-headed friend to see the truth that had been as clear as day to him since last weekend.

Daichi was smitten.

***

The problem with being a college student these days is time; there never seems to be enough of it. Especially for all the "life changing" and "once-in-a-lifetime" experiences happening every day on campus, one would think there should be more time dedicated to students attending these. And yet, the reality for a majority of students seems to be that most of their precious time is actually spent studying for exams they won't remember, or writing papers they'll never look at again. Even for a studious person like Jun, spending too much time on schoolwork could be taxing, especially when all she really wanted to do was read a book that didn't have to do with the rise and fall of the Soviet Union.

However, for once in her college career, Jun was rather relieved to be so bogged down with schoolwork that she barely had any free time to herself. In between studying for her own classes and adding another study group to her tutoring schedule, Jun now practically lived at the library. Which meant avoiding what little contact she had with other people, including a certain dark haired devil who somehow still plagued her mind. In the weeks that followed their outing at the bar, Daichi had been appearing everywhere she went, adamantly asking when they could go out again. Equally flattered that someone like him would actually be so interested in her, and terrified that someone was actually so interested in her, Jun would only smile meekly and use her mountain of schoolwork as an excuse to run. Later, when she felt guilty, she'd send an apology text and try to reason that she really did have a lot of schoolwork to catch up on, especially with midterm exams around the corner. She couldn't fall behind, and really couldn't let her students suffer either. Even if she really did want to spent more time with Daichi.

Because truth be told, Jun couldn't get him out of her mind. She tried multiple times to use homework to drown him out. Yet like a wave crashing along the shoreline, he always returned, stealing her attention effortlessly. It was both annoying and terrifying. She wasn't supposed to feel this way, not about a boy. Boys didn't like someone like her, the silent little bookworm who cared too much about good grades and comfortable shoes rather than relationships and stylish clothing. It had to be fake, or a joke. Whatever it was though, it was making her lose focus and disrupting her routine, so it had to go.

Frustrated with herself and determined to complete her work without any of his distractions, Jun buckled down and tried to force her mind away from all thoughts of Daichi. She closed herself off in her room and sat at her desk for hours trying to write her latest research paper, but could only end up daydreaming about the way he had looked grinning giddily at the bookshelves in her room. When she switched to working at the library, it was worse. She'd imagine hearing him in the distant voices of other students, and would catch herself growing hopeful anytime someone with dark hair passed her table. Eventually, getting desperate, Jun had to seclude herself in the farthest corners of the library basement to manage to get any work done. But even there she would still find that occasionally her mind would wander and she'd remember the way he smiled at her; a crooked grin that hinted at mischief, but still lit a spark somewhere inside of her.

At least with her study groups, Jun had something else to keep her focused on other things. Kenma and Asahi were her usual students, but they both were far too quiet to help distract her from her own daydreams. Yet with so many classes scheduling exams or research papers lately, her regular group had grown significantly. It was enough to finally quiet her flustered mind and focus on the task at hand. By the end of the month Jun had three new students request to join her study group, and it was starting to look like she finally had control again and could focus long enough to complete assignments on a more regular schedule. Without any handsome distractions.

That is, until life decided to play a cruel joke, as it tends to do.

In an uncharacteristic turn of events, Jun was late to the library and her Thursday night study group. Arms cradling a stack of research papers she still hadn't completed reading, Jun had to awkwardly jog across campus while writing comments and correcting grammar. As if she didn't already feel bad enough that she was both running late and hadn't finished the reviews she had promised them, Jun couldn't stop worrying about the bad first impression she'd be leaving on her two newest additions to their group. Tonight was their first study session and Jun was both late and ill-prepared; it made her nauseous.

"Hi everyone, so sorry I'm late, you wouldn't believe the week I've had—" As soon as Jun had tossed open the doors of the library she nearly sprinted to the room she always reserved for her larger group study sessions. Her focus was still on writing the final note on Asahi's paper about the Spanish Inquisition that she didn't look up from the stack of papers until she heard it. That heavy baritone voice with just a hint of honey in the tone.

"That's alright, Teach, we waited for you."

Arms crossed and a broad smirk on his face, Daichi sat in the furthest chair from the door, watching with glee as the shock registered on Jun's face. Next to him and waving sheepishly at the dumbstruck tutor, Suga offered a softer greeting. "Hope we didn't surprise you too much, Jun. Asahi always speaks so highly of your tutoring that when I realized I could use some extra help, you were the natural choice."

Daichi leaned his elbows against the table, winking over to Jun as she hastily began passing out papers and avoiding meeting his eyes, "And I just tagged along to see the tutor, hope we won't cause too much trouble for you."

In a monumental show of nonchalantness, Jun nodded quietly and immediately dived into the lesson she had planned. Suga proved to be as diligent a student as Asahi, take copious notes and asking for help as needed. It was a welcomed balance to the chaotic energy sitting next to him. Daichi tried every trick he could think of to throw off her groove; interrupting other's questions to ask his own, conveniently 'forgetting' his own pen and paper and asking to borrow hers, anything he could do to make her flustered. And if he wasn't so perceptive, it probably would have looked like he had failed, but he knew better. Outwardly, Jun appeared calm, but the constant tapping of her pencil against the desk and the way she avoided direct eye contact with him were enough to know he'd done his job. And the tight ball of worry in his stomach began to loosen.

Because despite what Suga believed, Daichi didn't actually need a tutor. His grades were fine enough; they weren't spectacular or anything, but they were passing and he was keeping up with assignments just fine. The real reason he had followed Suga to the library was exactly as he'd said: to see Jun. And to make sure that the distance she'd been keeping was really from schoolwork and not from the lack of balls to say she wasn't interested. He liked to think he was a pretty confident guy, one who didn't fall apart at the smallest hint of rejection. But this quiet little mouse put all of that to the test, and he was relieved when she still flushed as sweetly at him as before.

"So..."

Rather than follow his roommates back to their dorm room as the study group began to disperse an hour and a half later, Daichi hung back, casually twirling a pencil while watching Jun shuffle to recollect papers.

Tucking a loose strand of hair behind her ear, Jun made a fuss to straighten the already perfectly stacked papers. "So...?"

"So, why're you avoiding me, Wallflower?" She must not have expected him to be so blunt about it, because his question finally made her look up with shock. He jumped off the table he'd been sitting on and sauntered over to her, leaning forward until he towered over her, "What, did you think if you disappeared I'd forget about you all of the sudden?"

"Um, well..." She tried to smile innocently, but it only made Daichi purse his lips. "maybe a little? I-I really have been pretty busy, but I know I'm not exactly fun to be around, so I figured—"

"You can stop right there with that self-deprecating bullshit." Tired of watching her shuffle the stack of papers continuously, Daichi snatched the canvas bag he'd seen her bring in and shoved the papers angrily inside before slinging it over his own shoulder. "Clearly if I thought all of that, I wouldn't be here right now asking why you're trying to ghost me. So, cut the lame excuses and tell me if I'm bothering you, and I'll go. Otherwise, the ramen place down the road is open 'til 3am and I'm starving."

Jun had spent weeks unable to think of much else besides the very set of dark eyes that now stared at her with such determination. She hadn't pictured them quite as stormy as they were now as he waited for her to say something, but even amidst the storm clouds she could still make out the specks of sunlight creeping through in rays of gold. It made her wonder why she ever avoided them in the first place.

"My treat." Two simple words spoken barely above a whisper, but it was enough to bring that smirk back to Daichi's face that Jun secretly adored. He gently tossed her the canvas bag in reply, ushering her out the door with an equally gentle hand to the small of her back.

"I won't say no to that."

***

"There you are, do you have a thing for hiding in the basement or something? I just spent an hour searching this whole damn place for you."

It was Saturday night, and true to form Jun was at the library studying. She liked the special type of quiet the library seemed to have late on the weekends; everyone else was out at parties or wherever college students went to make stupid decisions. So she was often one of the few souls in the building, and could finally work in the peace and quiet.

"Oh, hey Daichi." Appearing from behind a stack like specter, Daichi had plopped down at the small desk next to Jun as if he'd just run a marathon.

"That's all I get?" Feigning hurt, he swiped a hand across his forehead dramatically making Jun giggle. "I just spent an hour searching for you, desperately I might add, and all I get in return is 'hey'?"

"What's up?" Jun tried again, failing to keep the smile from her face.

"Yeah, that's so much better." Daichi deadpanned. Then, with a flourish, he tossed a crumpled stack of papers onto the desk in front of her, a proud smirk on his face. "Take a look at that, Wallflower."

Inquisitive, Jun leaned forward to get a closer look. It was a research paper of some kind, that much was clear. Even through the wrinkly pages, she could make out Daichi's name in the corner, and the large '96' circled in red next to it. A warm sense of pride rushed through her as she gently picked up the paper to get a better look at it. "Is this really yours?"

Snorting, Daichi crossed his arms, "Of course it is! Best grade I've ever had on an assignment, thanks to your tutoring. Don't think I've ever gotten higher than an 82 before."

For the first few weeks of following Suga to tutoring sessions, Daichi hadn't taken it very seriously. He'd goof off through most of it, or try and distract Jun, which didn't require much effort. Until Kenma gave him such an intense glare for disrupting Jun mid-sentence yet again, that he decided to try and pay attention instead. And once he did, he was quite surprised at just how helpful it turned out to be. Jun was a patient tutor, explaining concepts multiple times until everyone understood, and offering useful feedback on the assignments she reviewed. Daichi quickly fell into the habit of taking notes on everything she said, much like his other roommates, and he was finally reaping the benefits. Not the good grade, that was a nice plus, but not the true reward he'd been hoping for. The real one was sitting in front of him, wearing such a proud grin her entire face seemed to glow. A pride meant solely for him. He could bask in it all day.

"Daichi this is amazing! Really great job!" She always got a certain level of pride from seeing her students improve in their classes, and while she didn't want to believe this particular achievement was more special than the others, it definitely felt like it. "We should celebrate somehow."

"My thoughts exactly." That had been the moment he'd been waiting for. Grinning like the Cheshire Cat, Daichi pulled Jun from her seat, slammed her textbook closed and lead them both towards the exit. "And I've got just the place in mind. You like ice cream, right?"

Ten minutes later, Jun stood balking at the clearly closed entrance to the dining commons as Daichi expertly unlocked the doors as if he owned the place.

"You cannot be serious."

"What?" Daichi re-pocketed his copy of the door key and turned back to Jun, who looked like she'd just seen a ghost. "It's not that big of a deal. We pay for the food anyway, we should have access to it whenever we want."

But Jun just kept shaking her head, eyes round with fear. "It's against the rules. We could get caught, a-and expelled, or worse!" She could feel the anxiety buzzing like bees in her stomach, working their way up her throat until she felt like she'd be sick. This was wrong. It was breaking and entering. She was a good student, she couldn't be caught doing something like this.

"Hey, look at me, Wallflower." Daichi could see the panic setting in, clouding her vision and mind. "No one is going to be here to see us, I've done this loads of times and never been caught." It didn't seem to do much to reassure her though, so he tried again. "It's ok, Jun." Speaking softly, he placed both hands on either side of her face, forcing her to look up at him as he spoke, "You'll be with me, so nothing bad will happen. You can trust me."

Maybe it was the calming way he spoke, or the soft way his thumb traced circles on her skin, but Jun could feel her breathing even out and slow. She really did feel like she could trust him. And there was that nagging voice in the back of her mind, sounding a little too much like her brother, reminding her not to be such a stick in the mud. Jun from a few weeks ago wouldn't even have followed Daichi to the dining hall, let alone be standing here considering breaking in with him. But that Jun also was afraid of everything, and wasn't doing her any favors. Maybe this was her chance to take a risk, but a safer risk?

Taking a deep breath, Jun gave a brief nod, "Got a live a little, r-right?"

"That's my girl." Daichi smirked, taking Jun by the hand and leading them both into the empty dining hall. "Now we've got two things to celebrate."

It definitely felt strange, sitting on a counter in the darkened room, watching as Daichi served two of the largest bowls of soft serve ice cream she'd ever seen, complete with rainbow sprinkles. But after the first few bites, it didn't feel so bad after all, which must have showed on her face.

"Pretty fun being such a rebel, isn't it?" Daichi hopped onto the counter next to her and tried to swipe a spoonful of sprinkles from her bowl. "You like it, don't try and hide it."

Jun happily offered her bowl to Daichi, who greedily took a few more bites. "I don't know if this counts as really rebellious, but you're right, it is kinda fun." She still felt a bit anxious and her head kept darting to the entrance where she was expecting to see security guards there to take them to jail. But the longer they stayed without any incident, the more her shoulders relaxed and the sweeter the ice cream seemed to taste.

"Don't you worry, we'll have you transformed into a real delinquent soon enough." Daichi chuckled, using his spoon to smear a drop of ice cream on her nose, "I'm talking the real hardened crimes: stealing stuffed animals, only donating five dollars instead of twenty to charity, you'll be a real hardass."

Jun giggled, and in retaliation used the back of his sleeve to clean her face, which only made them both laugh harder. Happy to watch her smile like that all day, Daichi had to pry himself back to reality when their laughter began to echo around the empty room. "We should probably get going, staying here any longer and we might risk getting caught." He didn't want to leave this moment, not when it seemed like he'd found a way to break through that quietly polite facade. But time was a cruel mistress, and it seemed theirs had come to an end.

Just that one comment was all it took to shock Jun back into reality as well, and to remember where she was. Horrified yet again, Jun leaped to her feet like she had been sitting on hot coals and dashed off towards the door. Daichi followed, brushing off stray sprinkles from the counter and chuckling to himself, "Annnd she's back."

***

When Daichi finally caught up to Jun outside the student center, she was pacing the front steps to the building anxiously, clearly torn with how she was feeling. She had never done anything so reckless before. The regular feelings of anxiety and fear that normally plagued her whenever something was amiss were there, but this time they were accompanied by a new, strange humming excitement. Part of her had enjoyed it; the rush of disobeying rules and getting away with it. It had been exhilarating. Which only brought heavier feelings of dread for liking it so much.

"Fighting your inner demons?" After spending a few moments just watching Jun pace back and forth as she muttered to herself about right vs. wrong, Daichi decided enough was enough and cut her off. "It's ok ya know? You can still be the model student and get in trouble every once in a while. No one's keeping score, I promise."

Rather than stop her worried pacing, Jun just sped up. "But what if someone finds out? What if my parents hear about it? What if—"

"What if the moon is made of cheese and gets eaten by alien space-mice?" He replied sarcastically, "What if the university decides to enforce a dress code where we all have to wear frilly pink dresses? You're getting worked up over hypotheticals, and it's not going to help." Daichi took a step forward to stand directly in her path, a well-muscled barrier she couldn't push past. "Answer honestly: did you have fun tonight?"

"But—"

"No butts, Jun."

Reluctantly, Jun slowly nodded her head. "I guess I did."

"Good." Jun felt a calloused hand rest firmly on her head, "I did too. Now come on, we've got one more place to go tonight, and I promise it won't involve any more rule breaking."

"Well damn, I thought Tadaari had late hours on the weekend."

They were standing out front of the Hobbit Hole, Daichi disappointingly crossing his arms as he stared at the 'Closed' sign on the door. He could have sworn that the store was open extra late on Saturdays; he had wanted to surprise Jun with a new book, as a thank you for all the tutoring. It had been the backup plan in case ice cream hadn't gone well, and now he couldn't even offer her that.

"Yeah, he had to shorten hours." Jun muttered, gesturing to their right, "That new bookstore around the corner hasn't been great for business."

Not even a few weeks in business, the new three story fancy bookstore had already made its impact on the community. With late hours to accommodate the insomniac college students and cheap prices that fit into their shoestring budgets, it quickly became a popular location. Tadaari was still doing good business, he had plenty of regulars dedicated to supporting independent bookstores, but there was still a noticeable decrease in foot traffic. Enough so that it no longer made sense to keep later hours.

"New bookstore, huh?" Daichi grumbled lowly, stalking off in the direction Jun had indicated. Equally disappointed, Jun shuffled off after him. A new book would have been a real treat, especially after listening to Daichi list all the titles he thought she might like.

They rounded the corner, and there it was. It's brightly lit windows glowing in the darkness, happy customers eagerly wandering the shelves even during the late hour. Daichi scoffed disapprovingly. "Figures. It's one of those big chain stores that only cares about profits. I got kicked out of one a few years ago, they thought I was shoplifting."

Jun stared at him incredulously, but he just shrugged like it wasn't a big deal. "That's why I like Tadaari's store so much. He's not a prick about his customers, and he actually cares about the books. Unlike the people that run these places, only looking to make a cheap buck—hey, where you going?"

Something snapped in Jun's mind as she was listening to him; a hot, burning fury that pushed her to storm across the street towards the bookstore as if on a vengeful quest.
Without a word, and ignoring Daichi as he jogged to catch up, Jun entered the store, gave a polite but cold smile to the attendant, and disappeared into the bookshelves. She started in the Popular Titles section, pulling random books from the shelf and shoving them roughly into Daichi's arms, still ignoring his sputtering questions. Methodically, she made her way through the store, section by section pulling more titles until Daichi's arms were full and he finally got her attention.

"Jun what the hell?! What are we doing here? You can't seriously want to buy all these?" He'd never seen her like this; her jaw was clenched angrily and there was an icy determination in her eyes that changed her normally sweet face to stone.

"Of course I don't want to buy these." Even her voice was different, cracking like a whip in the quiet. "But you're right. Places like this don't care about their customers or the books they are selling. And they certainly don't deserve to be doing better than stores like the Hobbit Hole." As if that was explanation enough, Jun took the first book on the stack in Daichi's arms, a classic mystery, and shoved it onto the shelf in Non-Fiction. "So we might as well make it a little more interesting for them."

The smirk crept slowly at first, then spread across Daichi's entire face as he understood her meaning. "Hell yeah, let's do it." He took one from their stack, the store's last copy of the newest popular title, and placed it between two very large picture books about Northern Ireland. The satisfaction of seeing it so well hidden was immediate.

For another hour, Jun and Daichi wandered around, taking more books from their displays and placing them randomly throughout the store. The more they worked, the more creative they became, until Jun was almost caught shoving a copy of The DaVinci Code into the children's picture books, and both took it as their cue to leave. Once safely outside, they both burst into laughter, relishing in the image of disgruntled customers complaining to the managers.

"Damn, I did not picture you ever doing something like that!" Daichi wheezed, brushing a tear away from laughing too much. "Especially not after you looked so freaked about our free ice cream tonight." There really was a rebellious spirit inside her after all. And it was hot.

Jun ducked her head sheepishly, the red hot anger cleared from her vision and she was back to feeling self conscious. "I didn't expect it either, but I just got so—angry, and I had to do something." She had spent enough time at work lately trying to ignore the worried way Tadaari stared at the diminishing profit spreadsheets, that hearing how Daichi had been so poorly treated in a place that they both loved had been the straw that broke the camel's back. "Was that bad? Do you think we should go and put them all back?"

"Don't you dare!" He wrapped an arm around her, playfully keeping her from running back to the store, "If they can't handle a harmless prank like that than they don't deserve to run a business. And besides, I think it was badass of you." When she didn't try to escape his grasp, Daichi only pulled her closer, sighing happily when she snaked an arm around him too.

"Yeah, well, I learned from the best."

***

Sunday morning saw an unusual influx of customers to the Hobbit Hole, all of them incredibly happy to see large, full displays of the books they were looking for. Tadaari quickly went to work helping each customer find their requested books, a bit mystified when they all seemed to appreciate that the books were exactly where he had said they were.

Later that afternoon, Daichi wandered in with the rest of the crowd, quietly disappearing to the back to type in the response he finally felt was fitting.

She has little
innocent demons
inside her eyes,
and they recklessly
play with matches.

I've never seen
sparks so pretty.