O shit waddup

I'm back with more cringe

---

-If Ben Gets Roasted-

Jeff: *at Ben* I can easily mistake you as a trash can.

Ellie: *at Ben* You talk a big game about sex, now all you need is an actual partner.

Jack: *at Ben* The scent I recognize you by is the scent of pure bullshit.

Ao: *at Ben* Every time you try to tell me a joke, I laugh early because I'm already looking at one.

Ben: Ha. Nice roasts. You'll have to do better than that though.

Sam: *writes on a piece of paper* You're a lot like Link.

Ben: *stops smiling and stays silent* *pulls out his sword*

Jeff: Uhhh, Ben? You cool--?

Ben: *slashes at the group*

Everyone: *scream in utter terror*

---

-Ao & Ben Go On Vacation-

Ao: Ben! What on earth was all that?

Ben: I'm not sure what you're referring to.

Ao: You sunk an entire cruise ship, Ben!

Ben: Are you sure that was me? I-I would think I'd remember something like that.

Ao: Ben, I watched you fire a harpoon into the captain's face!

Ben: That sounds dangerous.

Ao: You were headbutting children off the ship!

Ben: That, uh... that must've been horrifying to watch!

Ao: Then you started making out with the ice sculptures!

Ben: Well, thank God that the children weren't on board to see it.

*silence*

Ao: Uhh.. Ben why is the lifeboat all red and sticky?

Ben: Well I guess you could say it is red and sticky.

Ao: Beeen, what are we standing in?

Ben: Would you believe it's strawberry milkshake?

Ao: No! I would not believe that!

Ben: Uhh, melted gumdrops?

Ao: No.

Ben: Boat nectar?

Ao: No.

Ben: Some of God's tears?

Ao: Tell me the truth Ben.

Ben: Fine. ...It's the lovely elderly couple from 2B.

Ao: ...BEEEEN!

Ben: Well they were, uh, they were taking all the croissant rolls.

Ao: I can't believe what I'm hearing!

Ben: I will not apologize for art.

Ao: Where are the other lifeboats?

Ben: Whoa! You won the prize, I didn't even notice that.

Ao: Where are the other lifeboats, Ben?

Ben: Looking at the trajectory of the moon and the sun...probably at the bottom of the ocean. I bit lots of holes in them.

Ao: BEN!

Ben: I have a problem. I have a serious problem.

Ao: You are just, terrible today!

Ben: Shhh! D'you hear that? That's the sound of forgiveness.

Ao: That's the sound of people drowning, Ben.

Ben: That is what forgiveness sounds like. Screaming and then silence.

---

Jack: I need to get something off my chest.

Ao: I hope it's your shirt

---

*Jeff & Jack walk by*

Ben: I'd definitely...hammer those b-holes.

Ao: Why's it gotta be gay, Ben? Why's it always gotta be gay?

Ben: what?

Ao: Why can't you just recognize someone as handsome and say 'oh yeah, that's a handsome man'.

Ben: I do..! But then..

Ao: But then you immediately want to intercourse them...!!!

---

Death: My sexuality? Well, you see it's-- *throws smoke bomb, disappears while you're distracted*

---

Jeff & Ellie on a date

*skipping stones on a lake*

Ellie: It's such a beautiful evening!

Jeff: *whispering* Take that you fucking lake

---

Ben: If I ever legitimately die...play this song at my funeral.

Ben: *turns on stereo*

*Space Jam theme song starts playing*

---

Ben: Life is hard, Sheba. You gotta take it by the balls...

Ao: Please don't--

Ben: And gargle it in your mouth.

Ao: *sighs*

---

Angsty Proxy Strikes Again

Ben: *does finger guns at them* ayyyy

Angsty proxy: fucking pull the trigger you coward

---

Ellie: *waking up from being 'dead'* what the FUCK

---

Jeff: I don't need alcohol to make bad decisions

---

Ao: what have you spent your life eating exactly?

Ben: ass

---

Ao: are you ever so attracted to someone that you just groan internally every time you see them like it's physically painful how attractive they are

Jack: *shows up* Hey

Ao: HHNNNNNNGHHHGHHH

---

Ellie: I'm no cactus expert, but I know a prick when I see one *points at Zalgo*

---

Ao: *picks up a baby* Jack, this is a baby.

Jack: *sniffs it* ...Can I fight it?

Ao: No.

Jack: Is it because it's stronger than me?

Ao: No, it's because it's a tiny baby.

Jack: I need to fight it.

Ao: *holding baby away* Jack, it's a baby.

Jack: It's suspicious.

---

Jeff: I'm done with you..!

Ellie: No you're not.

Jeff: You right.

---

Zalgo: You may think I'm a terrible person, but deep deep down I'm even worse.

---

Ben: I need to get fucked by something else other than my life

---

Ellie Fighting Zalgo

Ellie: *to Zalgo* I got a better idea! Why don't you go across the street and buy some condoms?! Because we should at least be safe if you're gonna fuck me!! Go ahead, fuck me, you bastard!! Right here in the middle of the street!! You wanna fuck your daughter so much, go on, fuCK ME, FUCK ME!!!

Zalgo: (　ﾟдﾟ)

---

Ben: You'd be perfect in the summer time!

Jack: And why is that?

Ben: Because you're shady as fuck.

---

Ao: I'm home! *comes back with groceries*

Jack: Aw, thanks.

Ao: Hey, you know that deal we made where if I buy the groceries, you'd cook tonight?

Jack: Uh huh.

Ao: So...are you gonna cook?~

Jack: ....No.

*The words 'savage life' suddenly appear on the screen. Everything's black and white. Ao is disappointed.*

---

Ellie: Honey bun?

Jeff: Yes?

Ellie: *blushing* I meant, would you like one?

Jeff: *blushing* Oh. Yeah, sure. Sugar?

Ellie: Yes?

Jeff: *blushing harder* I just meant, would you like some in your coffee?

Ellie: *further embarrassed* Oh. Yeah, sure.

Both: *flustered*

Ben: *from a distance* Even I am getting embarrassed from watching them.

---

Jeff: *has headphones on*

Death: *walks by*

Jeff: *singing to himself* Now baby we can do it, take your time, do it right *whispers really fast* we can fuck all night--bABY

Death: (*ﾟｰﾟ)

---

Jeff: Ben go fuck yourself.

Ben: I will! You know why? Because I am attractive! Everyday, I wake up, look in the mirror and ask myself 'would I fuck me'? And the answer is always YES!! Because I WOULD fuck myself!!!

---

Ben: This beautiful woman came and asked me how I was doing today..

Ao: Yeah?

Ben: And I couldn't decide whether to say 'I'm good' or 'I'm okay', so of course I freaked out and said 'I'm gay'.

---

Ellie: My grandma passed out in the living room! I think she's dying!

Zalgo: Well then I guess it's not the 'living' room anymore, hah *slaps knee*

---

Jeff: *texting Ellie* You're so pretty.

Ellie: *texts back* Aw thanks..!

Jeff: sorry, meant petty

Ellie: *deletes*

---

Ben Reacts to Anime Once Again

-Higurashi no Naku Koro ni-

Ben: NOT THE FUCKING FINGERNAILS AAAGGAH

-Junjou Romantica Series-

Ben: *nodding* I'm into this.

-Sekai ichi Hatsukoi-

Ben: Oh fuck yes, this is good shit, good shit right here.

-Sword Art Online-

Ben: Sword Art Online...more like....Sword Ass Online amirite?? Or more like the Reject Womens Club?? Heh?? Heh..... Kill me.

-Beyond the Boundary-

Ben: MEGANE CHICKS ALL THE WAY. AO!

Ao: What?

Ben: WILL YOU BE MY MEGANE WAIFU??

Ao: no.

Ben: OKAY.

-Another-

Ben: Another? More like...get Another body bag. Get it? Because......people keep dying.

-Ao no Exorcist-

Ben: Ao no Exorcist? More like.....Ao needs an exorcist. Get it? Because she's got Sam...and...she's also scary when she's on her per--.

Sam: *throws the computer keyboard in Ben's face*

-Bleach-

Ben: This shit too long.

-Fairy Tale-

Ben: This also too long.

-One Piece-

Ben: All of my friends will be dead by the time I finish this.

-Naruto-

Ben: fffffUCK SASUKE X SAKURA *throws desk chair*

-Cory in the House-

Ben: This is by far the best anime ever, hands down, asses up, I would let this show pound me hard in broad daylight until I'm numb, praise lord Gaben *claps hands and raises them to the sky*

Ao: ......have you been high this entire time?

Ben: Yes.

---

Whaddup

It's yo boi, Death

bYE