Will pov:

We headed back to the infirmary, hands connected, arms swinging. I'm pretty sure the whole camp knows now, if they didn't before, but I'm just glad to see my small angel smiling for real for once.

When we get there, Nico stops me before sitting on his bed and looks me right in the eyes.

"I need to ask you something. " he said, sounding very serious.

"Anything. I'm all ears." I replied, expecting a sarcastic response that didn't come.

"When.... If one of us dies first...." he started slowly, "does the other have permission to join them?" He looked so shaken up and scared.

"Uhhhh. I don't know. I guess sure?? I mean it'd mean we'd spend less time away from each other I guess? I don't know."

"Okay... what if we left at the same time? What if we like idk both hang ourselves or something at the same time?"

Shit. I knew his smiling seemed odd. Why did I say that? Now he probably thinks there's nothing wrong with him leaving because I'll follow him.

"Nico... there are so many people here that love us, love you. More than just me. You can't leave them, we can't just leave them. I know exactly how you feel and how badly you want it, trust me I understand, but I also understand that we can't go, not now, not anytime soon."

"You don't know how I feel. You don't understand at all." He said slowly and calmly. "And if they cared so much, they would've done something, they would've shown me." Tears started falling from his eyes.

"They've tried! But you push them away!" I shouted and stormed out the door.

I know getting angry at him won't help anything, but it's hard. He's so stubborn and doesn't know half of what I know on this subject. He acts like nobody knows what he's going through and I understand that, but it's still frustrating.

I stomp all the way back to my cabin and into my room area, falling onto the bed and sighing.

I hate myself. How could I possibly stand to yell at him. At Nico di Angelo. The love of my life. I can feel the tears coming they even come.

Before the first one has a chance to fall though, my door opens and there he is. I never thought of Nico to be the one to come back after an argument. I thought I'd have to be the one going back to him.

He looked sad. Probably because I yelled at him. I'm such a horrible person. And boyfriend.

"Nico, I'm sorry-" I started, but he shook his head, sadly.

"No, Will, I'm sorry. I should've caught onto what you meant by your words quicker. I just, I didn't want it to be true. I'm sorry for not noticing sooner." He bit his lower lip, clearly unsure what to do next.

"What are you talking about?"

Part of me was trying to play dumb and part of me just wanted to confirm we were thinking about the same thing. I hated keeping secrets, but I wasn't gonna tell him this unless I had to.

"Your self harm." He muttered, barely audibly.

Shit. How did he figure it out? I mean I know how, but I was hoping he hadn't heard that part.

"Show me please?" He asked somehow even quieter than before.

I sat up and slowly nodded my head, pulling my jeans down just low enough that he could see my thighs and the scars scattered all over them.

I watched his eyes get sadder and sadder the longer they looked. My tears, finally, falling down my cheeks as I pulled my pants back up and laid back down. I pulled the blanket over me and turned on my side so my back was facing him. I loved him, but I wasn't gonna let him see me cry.

"Will, I love you and don't mind seeing you cry." Nico said, as he awkwardly sat down on my bed.

I turned over and looked at him, the tears streaming down my face. How he knew I was crying, I have no idea, but trusted him more than he trusted me, I'm sure.

"Nico," I started between sobs, "I think I may be in love with you. And. And I want to help you. No matter what it takes." I managed to choke out before He showed up.

A/N - two updates within a few days of each other? Wack I know, but i was motivated and inspired so here you go