I have to wake up every morning at the ungodly hour of 4 a.m. so I can get to school on time. I've been doing this year after year, making me question how I haven't ever fallen asleep in class. School doesn't start that early, in fact it starts quite late for high school, but I live extremely far away from it. 

I could easily go to a more basic school, but my mother insists I go to this one because it grooms academic success. I love my mother, but she constantly pressures me into being what she calls 'my best self'. I must be as perfect as possible, or else I might already just deem myself to be a colossal failure.

Evelign, you must be the top of your class. Evelign, when you graduate I expect to see you as valedictorian. Evelign, sit up straight. Evelign, don't talk back to me. Evelign, why aren't you smiling properly? Evelign. Evelign. Evelign. 

She tells me this again and again, breaking me down and re-constructing me to be the girl she wants me to be. The girl my father wanted me to be, before he left and abandoned my mother. She's convinced if I am the textbook definition of perfect, then he will come home. Yet I know, he never will.

"Evelign, get up. It's your first day of senior year and you will not be late." Mother screams at me from the kitchen downstairs like she does every day. Sometimes it amazes me how she hasn't broken any of her vocal chords.

It takes me a while to actually get out of my bed. I'm tired. Obviously. I didn't get enough sleep. I never do. I honestly wish I was allowed to go to a regular school, a public school, but no, I'm not allowed. "Evelign, you must be trained in a higher level than what public school teaches you." Mother would constantly tell me.

I would have to spend days tutoring and studying so that I would be good enough to get into a prestigious high school. My mother's positive that if I can graduate with perfect test scores at a pressure school then I will be assured a place in an Ivy League.

I change out of my pink bunny pyjamas and into a plain white top and a black skirt. It's simple, but I don't really care. I'm not looked at in school, because I am a walking shy and smart girl cliché. I don't consider it a bad thing, at all. In fact, it might just work out in my favour. After all, every teen romance movie's main character is the pretty girl who is also very shy and classified as a nerd, who ends up falling in love with the rebellious bad boy who magically is able to keep his spot in an esteemed school that is distinguished for having smart students.

Once I go downstairs, my mother greets me with a smile and a stack of chocolate chip pancakes with syrup on the side. It smells absolutely delicious, so I do what any hungry person would do, and try to quickly devour it.

"Evelign, don't rush to eat your food, you need to keep your model figure." My mother says. Oh my god, can she not go one second without telling me what to do? No, of course she can't. She's my mother.

"Eating fast doesn't make you put on weight. Eating unhealthy food does, and you are the one who is literally serving me chocolate chip pancakes every day." I snap back at her. I'm so tired and hungry right now, I don't even care if she gets mad at me for saying that.

Surprisingly, she doesn't. She just starts stealing some of my pancakes and eating them. I guess she is hungry/tired too.

After breakfast, if breakfast is even allowed to be at this hour, I grab my bag and put on a pair of boots before heading to the bus stop. Fortunately, there is a bus right a couple blocks away from my house which takes me almost directly in front of my school. The only pain is that it's a small bus and it's full of the same nosey and weird people. There's Geraldine, around the age of seventy or so, who is always asking me about my love life (non-existent), and Christina who a bit younger than Geraldine who is obsessed with the way I look despite looking absolutely flawless herself for her age, and also Luke, a grumpy old guy who sits in the back off the bus and occasionally enters the conversation to oppose an opinion someone has, and well, you get the point. A very interesting set of people.

Once I get on, Brian, the bus driver, probably the closest person on the bus to my age, says hello, causing a domino effect on everyone else.

"Oh, hello sugar! You are back!" Geraldine smiles and practically grabs and squeezes me in her arms. "How was your summer?"

"It was good, Geraldine." I say quietly whilst smiling. After a bit, she lets go of her tight grasp on me. Despite finding everyone on the bus incredibly annoying at most times, I still like them. Even grumpy old Luke.

"Speak up, doll!" Christina shouts, her voice going so high at the end I am almost positive that she might shatter the windows if she ever does that again.

"Sorry." I sit down at my regular seat, which is also the only seat left.

"Don't apologise." Geralidine laughs. "Only apologise if you didn't pick up any hot boys during your break."

"Then I guess my apology is still valid."

"You must be joking, right? I mean look at you, hun, you are absolutely gorgeous. If I looked like you when I was your age, every boy in town would be swooning for me." Christina gushes.

"Is this your outfit?" A voice from behind me says. I don't even have to turn around to know who it is, I can tell from the cynical voice. Emily.

Oh yes, I almost forgot to mention the infamous Emily. Her age has never been specified, but I can only assume it's around the same as the rest. Her short wavy blonde hair is still visible, but is fading into the grey which comes with old age. She has fairly ordinary features; a pair of striking blue eyes and a round face, but it's naturality has been traded in for heavy amounts of makeup. She reminds me of my mother, but obviously a bit older. She isn't outright with her opinions, like bluntly telling you that you look hideous, but instead suggests it with her harsh and judgmental tone.

"I think it is a good outfit." Geraldine reassures me.

Luke pitches in. "You can't judge her outfit, Emily. Not if you are wearing whatever the hell that is."

Emily clearly is triggered by his comment because she snaps right back. "You have no right saying that to me, Luke! I did not say anything wrong but asked her if that was what she was wearing."

"Well of course that is what she is wearing, it's on her right now!" Luke seethes.

"Can we all stop fighting?" Carter rolls her eyes (another member of the morning bus entertainment performance).

"I agree. We shouldn't ruin poor Evelign's day with bickering. It's her last first day of high school for god's sake!" Geraldine tries to comfort me with her soft voice, but honestly, I'm enjoying this whole debate.

"My last first day at high school went absolutely horribly. These punks bullied my friends and I." Emily says, causing Luke to laugh a bit under his breath.

"Must be why you are so bitter." He mutters.

"What was that?" Emily's eyes go wide, lashing her head back to face Luke's amused face. He doesn't respond to her.

I check my watch. 5:43. Wow. The bus crew never ceases to astonish me. Here I am, a young and should be energised teenage girl, sitting here barely functioning, while they, the elderly bus crew are able to have enough vitality in them to have constant arguments. I would never be able to come up with a good comeback this early in the morning. My deflection to everything would probably be "I'm trying to sleep, leave me alone". They must all be on a whole load of coffee.

"So, back to you, darling!" Christina adds in trying to shift the conversation to an easy topic. Me. "We know that there were no eligible bachelors in your life during the summer, so what did happen then?"

I was so close to not having to speak anymore during the bus ride. "Well...um...nothing really." I can't think of anything, not on the spot at least. Give me a day's notice and then I might actually remember stuff.

Geraldine continues the conversation, despite me being so close to falling asleep right this second. "Oh come on pumpkin, there must be something! I know your mother, she loves to travel. Did you go anywhere special?"

"Not this summer. We are going to Rome and Paris during winter break though." Well at least I got some words out of me.

"Did you hang out with friends then?" Geralidine asks.

Of course I did, my friends and I had a blast. Every day we would go out shopping and buy some rich designer accessories and then afterwards either go to an amusement park or a water park. God, it was the best summer ever! Oh wait, I don't have any friends.

"Nope." I say leaning my head against the window, pretending that it is a pillow. A very uncomfortable pillow.

"You are tired, aren't you sweety?" Geraldine tilts her head, examining and analysing me to try and find a reason for my short responses.

"Yeah." I smile.

"Then we will not bother you anymore. You should sleep." Thank you, Geraldine.

For the rest of the bus ride, I do just that, sleep. I know I am not going to get any of that at school, that's for sure.

***

The bus drops me off a few minutes away from school. You'd think that in the last year of high school, everything would look a lot smaller, minuscule in comparison to the large uncertainty of what will happen the second after we graduate, but no. The school is still huge. However, I might just feel that way since the whole school is pretty much vacant.

It's 7 a.m. No student would ever be so ridiculous to get to school almost two hours before it started. Well, no one as ridiculous as me I guess. I sit on a bunch right in front of the large building, grabbing out a pair of headphones from my backpack. I listen to music to pass time.

Not much later, the teachers arrive. I don't think there are many things more embarrassing than being at school before your own teachers. Actually, I could think of a few, but I'd rather not bring up humiliating moments in my life which made me feel so awful inside that I puked my feelings out into a trash bin.

Each teacher smiles and waves at me telling me how excellent it is that I am so eager to be at school that I decided to come hours early. Not like I had the choice. All the teachers like me because I have consistently gotten the best grades each year. That's the only reason I get any attention at all at this school, because I'm being praised like I am the teacher's pet. It's either I am ignored, or hated, and if I had to choose, I'd rather be ignored.

A bit over an hour later, students finally arrive in their cliques (yes, even fancy schools can have cliques). The first to make an appearance are the "nerds", followed by the "goths" and then the "jocks" with the "cheerleaders" following not much after. Then comes the "band geeks" and the "athletic girls" right behind them, and then everyone's favourite: the "mean girls". Why anyone likes them is beyond me. So what if they are abnormally attractive? They all have a hideous personality.

I fall in with the nerds, being part of the whole mathlete thing in all, but I'm not that close with any of them to call them my friends or ever hang out with them. My mother thinks I am miss popular at this school because of my academic performance, but trust me, no one cares about that. Not here at least. It's all about who you are dating or who has the prettiest body. Even then, you can be beautiful, but if you don't belong in a group, then you are insignificant.

As I walk in, I head straight to my homeroom Over the summer, we were given our schedule, our locker number, and of course, our homeroom. Knowing the logistics of the school pretty well, navigating around isn't that hard.

According to the email I was sent, I am in 'homeroom 4B with Miss Jensen in classroom number 132. It takes a while to get there because the halls are infiltrated with stampedes of confused freshmen knocking into me every two seconds.

I walk into the classroom and I am the first one there. Even before Miss Jensen. This has got to stop happening. I sit down at the closest round table to the front of the classroom. Five minutes later, a woman rushes in and trips over their own feet, causing them to collapse to the ground and make their books go flying. I rush over to help them up. She's young, but her outfit is formal enough to give me an indication that she is a teacher. Miss Jensen.

"Thank you..." Miss Jensen pauses realising she doesn't know my name.

"Evelign. Evelign Wright." I tell her.

"Well, thank you Evelign Wright. Nice to meet you." She quickly rushes over to her desk and starts preparing for the introductory part of the school day.

It takes a while for everyone to actually arrive in the classroom, and when they do they all sit down. Well, almost everyone. There is one empty seat but Miss Jensen starts anyways. She talks about rules at the school and the expected behaviour as well as how much homework is going to be assigned each day. She gets somewhere near halfway through her speech when someone barges in.

Holy smokes-