I don't go to dances much. The last time I've been to one was probably in 6th grade. I went with Evan (as friends of course), expecting something over-the-top to happen, but no, just a normal 6th grade dance.

The whole concept of dances has always seemed kinda odd to me. I mean, it's basically just a party but with adult supervision and no alcoholic beverages. I don't see any appeal to it.

Yet here I am, sitting with Evan and Alana during a Halloween dance, watching poorly dressed teenagers talking and chugging off-brand Fanta.

I'm not even sure what I'm supposed to be doing right now. You'd think that more people would be dancing at a highschool dance, but no. I'd assume that everyone's either too self-conscious about their dance moves, or they just plainly have better things to do than dance.

I fall on the self-conscious side of the spectrum. That probably doesn't come as a surprise.

"So um..." Evan said, trying the break the silence between us.

"You should give a speech." Alana interrupted, turning to Evan, "You know, so people know the dance is for Connor?"

I could see Evan physically tense up. The mention of Connor seemed to put him on edge. Maybe he just wanted to have fun tonight, and forget all about the Connor Project. It's what I wanted.

"Oh, uh, definitely." Evan said. He knew not to argue with Alana.

"Don't make him do anything he doesn't want to." I said casually to Alana, though not looking at her.

Alana sighed, "Yeah, you... don't have to."

Evan, though, shook his had. "No, it's fine, really."

I sighed and shook my head to myself. I could tell Evan was extremely uncomfortable giving another speech, especially after what spiraled from the last one. But either way, he didn't want to let anyone down. Classic Evan.

"You sure?" I asked, and he nodded.  "mmmm ok then."

"Well, go on then!" Now that Alana knew Evan was going to do it, all the regret she showed a moment ago was gone.

Evan nodded to himself and walked up to the front of the gym, where Alana had conveniently set up a microphone.

Alana paused the music from her phone and Evan picked up the microphone. He tapped it once or twice to make sure it was working before talking.

"Hi." He said simply. Everyone in the gym was staring at him, wondering why he interrupted their 'dancing'. By dancing, of course, I mean standing and talking and maybe doing some karaoke.

Evan cleared his throat. "I just wanted to say t-" he stuttered before taking a deep breath and restarting his sentence. "I just wanted to s-say thank you to all of you. On behalf of the Connor Project, of course."

Of course.

"All of the money you've paid tonight-"

"A lot!" I heard someone yell in the audience, and everyone followed up laughing and/or cheering.

"Uh- yeah, thanks?" It came out as more of a question . Obviously Evan was slightly taken aback by the comment. I guess he can't take a joke. "Anyway... All the money we're getting tonight is going to the Connor P-Project fundraiser to bring back C-Connor's favorite orchard." His eyes were a little teary now, I could see it. Maybe it was because of Connor or maybe it was because he remembered that he wasn't really Connor's friend. Either way, not my problem.

"If you c-care... to donate more, I mean, then you can go to our kickstarter page." He took another deep breath, "Now, continue." He walked back towards us and Alana unpaused the music. Everyone resumed their activities.

"Great, Evan!" Alana said as Evan stopped in front of us. Evan only nodded in response.

We sat there in silence for a moment before I started, "Now wha-"

Evan interrupted me, speaking quickly, "Jared can we talk for a second?"

Alana immediately turned to me with a smug look, to which in response, she got an elbow to the rib.

"Sure." I said, shrugging it off as if my heart wasn't running 20 miles a minute.

Evan's eyes darted from me to Alana, before mumbling, "Alone?"

Alana shot up from the bench eagerly. "I probably should check on Olivia anyway." She said before darting over to the concession stand.

Evan didn't sit down, though. "I was kinda hoping we could walk?"

I tried my best to give him a small sympathetic smile, but it probably looked mocking. I stood up and we walked out of the gym and out to the school's sidewalk.

"I'm tired..." Was the first thing that came out of Evan's mouth.

"Me too-"

"of this." Evan finished. "And I don't know what to do or how to end it 'cause everyone's relying on me and they don't even know what they're doing!" He was speaking fast and panicked.

I wasn't sure how to respond to that. "You are talking about the Connor Project right?"

He nodded, before continuing to race, "I have a life and I can't live with this burden of a lie on my shoulders!" He tried to take a deep breath, but it came out shaky. He was on the verge of crying. "This is all a lie, Jared!"

I nodded, not willing to meet his eye. The moment I make eye contact with him, I'll burst out in tears, too.

"We're robbing people of their money, for an orchard that Connor probably couldn't even care less about..." His voice was slowing down, but it was definitely getting higher and more congested. He was definitely crying now.

"Lemme get this straight... you want to turn yourself in?"

"Don't say it like that..."

I crossed my arms, and, I'm not gonna lie, I was slightly irritated. "You've gotten this far, and now you just wanna give up? This is your future now, Evan!"

"THAT'S THE PROBLEM!" Evan shouted, before taking a breath, "That's... that's the problem..."

And then, I made the worse mistake I could make at a time like this. I looked at Evan. In the eye. While he was crying.

"Jared, no I didn't mean to-" Evan scrambled after he saw my eyes water.

"Fuck this..." I mumbled, trying my hardest not to break down.

The thing is, I understood Evan's pain. He was, at first, trying to do what was right, but it ended up spiralling into something that's more than wrong. He wanted to make it right again.

I just wasn't entirely sure how that was possible.

"Jared..." Evan said guiltily.

"No it's fine. I'm not hurt." I said through tears.

"You're... Uh... Crying??"

"No shit." I rolled my eyes, (which were watery)

Evan sighed, "I'm sorry I shouldn't have-"

"Evan!" I said sternly. "It's. Fine." I took a deep breath before continuing, "I understand, Evan. I just don't see how we're supposed to relieve the burden. We can't just go up to someone and say," I made my voice high pitch for humorous purposes, "'oh yeah Connor wasn't real hehe uwu"

Evan almost cracked a smile. Not quite though.

"I know. But I- but I wish there was another way to stop all of this."

I didn't respond to that. I didn't know how. No one would believe us, and if they somehow did, they wouldn't understand any of it.

TLDR; we're screwed.

---
Yo I'm back.
Kinda.
I actually only wrote like 3 paragraphs of this today and the rest I wrote in September so.
Yeah.
Sorry bout that.
I promise I know where I'm going with this (now).
I have the next few chapters somewhat lined up and then pOof, it will be over.

Published: 1/12/20 (so like almost half a year since last update-)
Word Count: 1302