Trigger warning

Jordan's PoV

"Did you," tears streaming down his face.

"I...i," I can't manage words.

"Jordan," he cries.

I shake my head and run into my room. I run to the bathroom. I'm glad I hid one behind the toothpaste. I grab the blade.

1 for loneliness.

1 for cutting myself.

1 for loving someone I can't have.

1 for Tucker.

1 for Sonja.

2 for Tom because he has to witness this.

With the 7 new cuts on my arm I slide down the wall.

"I'm sorry Tom, I'm sorry Sonja, I'm sorry tucker," I cry.

I here frantic pounds on the door, "JORDAN STOP OPEN UP PLEASE," Tom cried from the outside the door.

"I'm sorry tom," I glide the blade two more times on my upper thigh.

"JORDAN," I the door busts open.

"I'm sorry Tom you can leave if you want," I cry, letting the blood flow out of me.

"No no no I thought I got them all," he sobbed.

"Tom why are you crying," I ask trying to move my body but unable to.

"Because your hurting yourself," he sobbed.

"Oh well you shouldn't care about me," I weakly smile.

"Jordan I care about you, your my best friend I would kill for you," he smiled at me. My eyes started to close.

"Goodbye Tom," I shut my eyes letting the darkness consume me.

Tom's PoV

"Goodbye tom," he shut his eyes.

No no no no what should I do. I pull out my phone and call 911.

"Hello what's your emergency," the lady asks.

"My friend he cut himself and his bleeding, he is unconscious," I sob into the phone.

"Ok we will send for help can I have the address," she asked frantically. I give her the address, "help is on the way calm down sir."

I hung up after that. "Jordan it will be ok I promise," I rub his head.

I need to call Sonja and Tucker. I pull out my phone again and call Tucker.

"Hey man nice stream what's up," he asked.

"Jordan pick me up at his house," I cry.

"Tom what's wrong what happened," he asked.

"I I" I can't muster words.

"Here Sonja talk to her," he said.

"Hey Tom," she says. I sob louder.

"Jordan," I cry.

"Yes what about him," I can tell that she is confused.

"Come pick me up here," I hear them knock on the door, "it's open."

"What open why are you crying," she cried.

"Sir where is the person," one of the paramedics said.

"Right here," I point crying.

"Tom answer me," Sonja demands.

"He cut himself," I sob.

"Oh my god," she cried.

"I'm on my way Tom no need to worry he will be ok," Tucker said, I must have been on speaker.

"O ok," I cry walking away. I see Jordan on a stretcher being wheeled away, "Jordan stay with me."

"He will be ok tom," I here Sonja coo.

"We are here," I here Tucker say. I run out to his car. Sonja steps out. She runs up to me and gives me a hug.

"How bad is it," she asked.

"7 on his arm, 2 long ones on his thigh," I sob in her arms.

"Oh that's horrible," Tucker said.

"We need to go," I stop sobbing only to have tears still falling.

We walk to the car and get in. The ride there I was very impatient. As soon as we got there I bolted out of the car and into the hospital.

"Jordan Maron," I rush up to the desk.

"I'm sorry sir you have to wait, he is in surgery," as she said that I burst into tears.

"O ok," I wobble my way over to Sonja and hug her tightly.

"Shh it's ok," she soothes, "i know it's hard to see your best friend like this."

I look over at tucker, I lung myself to him.

"I'm sorry I haven't been there for you," I cry into his shoulder.

"Don't worry about it man," his voice cracks. I pull away from the hug. I need to sit down. I'm not sitting on the uncomfortable hospital seats. I walk over to the wall and slide down.

"Why why why," I whisper under my breath, "goddamn it I could have stopped him, I could have looked harder for the blades, I should have known that Jordan wouldn't just leave them all in plan sight, god Tom how could you be so fucking stupid," I slam my hand on the floor, "its all my goddamn fault, if I didn't grab his wrist, if I didn't push him to tell me, if I pull him away from the bedroom, maybe we wouldn't be here at this moment," I mumble, "maybe if I hit the door harder I could have stopped him before he cut."

"Tom it's not your fault," I here the faint Sonja.

"Yes it is," I cry, "I pushed him, I pushed him to tell me, I caused this he was overwhelmed."

"No Tom it's not your fault," she cooed.

"Family of Jordan Maron," I doctor said. I shot up.

"Friends," I correct him.

"He has no family," he asked.

"Not here," I say annoyed.

"Ok well come with me," I pull Sonja and Tucker off the ground and we follow him to a room, "so I assume that you knew about his self harm."

"Well not until today," I say.

"Oh well he lost a lot of blood," he sighed.

"No shit Sherlock," I snap.

"Tom shh," Sonja put a hand on my shoulder.

"Anyways, he is in a coma," he said looking at his paper.

"No no no no," I whimper.

"Oh are you his partner," he asked.

"What no I'm his best friend," I Shake my head.

"Ok, well if you would like to see him he is in the next room," he points around the corner.

"Ok thank you," I say running out of the room.

"Sir whatever you see in there you must not freak out," a nurse says holding my arm. I pull out of her grasp. I walk into the room.

"Jordan," i see all different types on mechanics scattered all over the room.

"Tom he's going to be ok," I here an uncertain Sonja.

"But what if he's not ok," I snap looking back to see the almost lifeless body.

I walk over to his side. "It will be ok Jordan it will be ok," I rub his hand.

_________________

Aww poor Jordan, poor Tom.

One of my dear friends was like Jordan, so this on goes out to you person who will remain nameless.

SUMMER OUT