Chapter 4-

 Mom and Matt finally came home at 7:00p.m. carrying bags of Chinese takeout. The smell of onions and sprouts wafted in my nose, it made my stomach growl.

"Thank God you guys got home safe. Hi Matt," I acknowledged.

"Hey Jordan," he replied dropping his briefcase and on takeout bag on the ground and reached over for a hug. I could tolerate Matt because he's not judgemental, plus he's in love with mom. He smiled I opened my arms for a hug as well.

I was so hungry. The lunch at school wasn't that filling: an apple and chicken patty sandwich. We shared our portions of food and sat together at the dinner table. They were stealing kisses and bites of food as dinner progressed. It reminded me of how mom and dad used to do that and me playfully puking at the sight but they loved each other. Loved, past tense. I'm still getting used to it. "So, Jordan how was your first day?" Asked Matt, his blue eyes filled with wonder.

"Fine. Met a girl named Myra and a boy named Kyle. He's the one that gave me a ride home and showed me around school." Both Matt and mom nodded in appreciation.

"How's the car? " I asked shoveling food in my mouth to change the subject.

"Fine," both answered simultaneously in a calm tone. Too calm even.

"Right." I squinted my eyes to mom, she's fiddling with her food and cleared her throat, Matt squeezed her shoulder. Huh. I shrugged off the weirdness and continued eating.

Twenty minutes passed as we ate in silence, utensils clanging against the plates.

"Jordan," mom said to me, I looked up from my food to her.

"You know we've been dating for six months. After your dad, I didn't think I would fall in love again. Matt has made me whole, I don't know what I'll do without him." Her smile lighting up looking at him, he kissed the back of her hand. My eyes back and forth to both of them, wondering what's going on.

"For the past eight weeks, I've been feeling nauseous and eating lots of carbs. We went to clinic today for a checkup and... we're expecting our first child." I dropped my fork on the plate my pupils as big as saucers staring at both of them.

"Oh my God. Wow." I spoke, not knowing what else to say.

"I said the same thing," Matt said with a small smile, they were getting busy like that?

"So you guys really are together huh?" I twisted my napkin around with my hands.

"We are. This will be your future brother or sister. It's a blessing." Mom said as Matt held mom's hand.

I let out an breath, it was a blessing but I was still in shock of the news.

I stood from my chair smiling, approaching them and hugged them both tightly, going the positive route. "I'm happy for you both and I'm glad you're with my mom, she's very happy." I held them tighter, my smile becoming bigger.

Hearing mom crying tears of joy, she kissed me on the cheek softly and speaking how much she loved me.

"Does Jim know about it?" I asked of my 14 year old brother.

"No but he will. I want to tell them when I'm at least five months."

'"Dad?"

She shook her head, "I'll tell him soon."

Meaning never, I smiled to them again and we grouped hug once more.

Dinner ended, I offered to wash the dishes. Matt and mom were sat on the couch cuddling. After I finished, I went upstairs to watch TV in to my room. I was happy that mom found someone and the new baby. But everything was going so fast, things were changing so quickly I had to get used to it.

I grabbed the remote an began flipping the channels. Reruns of 'Gossip Girl' on The CW channel came on, my favorite characters was Serena Van der Woodson. She was fabulous, reckless and impulsive. She got up and stood her ground from all the bullshit thrown at her.

The episode airing of Serena and Dan kissing after their first date, memories of Jason coming back. I pursed my lips holding back tears.

From being real sweet in the beginning and doing a 180 put me in a whirlwind. Showing his true colors to me when he was on drugs: bitter, mean, cold. He liked to cheat, he used me. I wiped off the stray tear that fell from my cheek. Flipping the channel, I stopped at cartoon network removing the toxic past relationship from my mind.

+++

The first week of school went by fast, so far learning from a new school had been ok. The rest of my teachers have been patient, I've caught up on assignments too. Being Thursday afternoon, the weekend was almost here. Yes! Heading to my locker, I took out my journal for my last class, English. Turning away to shut it close, I bumped into someone. "Ow." Holding my shoulder, I rubbed the pain away.

"Sorry," the guy apologized. "I need to learn to keep my eyes off the ground."

"Yeah, it happens."

"Have I seen you before?" He asked, squinting his eyes.

I looked up to his face, studying it too but said slowly,"I don't think so." But the memory clicked of the boy staring at me on my first day.

"You're right. I could have remembered someone as beautiful as you."

"Whoa, a charmer."

"That I am. Shane." He lifted his hand up, open palm for a handshake. Meeting it, I grabbed and introduced myself.

"Jordan."

"What school did you transfer from?"

"Annapolis High."

"You know about the party tomorrow?"

"I might stop by."

"Hope so." His light grey eyes wide as he smirked. I laughed tugging on my straps, my stomach fluttered and felt my cheeks getting hot. I needed to stay away.

"See you around, Shane."

"You too, Jordan." I turned around and walked down the hall, finding the classroom.

+++

This dinner tonight seemed like a bad idea. I did miss dad and Jim. Dad seemed like he changed another person since he left.

'"Honey, are you ready?!" Yelled mom from downstairs.

"Yeah, just let me get my shoes on!"

My ensemble was completed of skinny blue jeans with a nice dark red blouse, I slipped on my black flats, rested my hands on my thighs tiredly.

Let's get this over with. I practiced my smiles in front of the mirror: cheeks high and no teeth were good enough. Maybe I should show at least more teeth. I opened my lips, grinning but my expression was similar to a vampire. I groaned shaking my head, huffed and sagged my shoulders before headed downstairs ready to leave. Mom gave a quick glance to what I was wearing and curled her top lip.

"I wish you wore a dress sweetie," mom whined.

"This is dressy enough, mother." I pointed out. I liked dresses, it was pointless though, I only wore it on special occasion, dinner with dad didn't feel so special. Mom shrugged sighing, grabbing her keys and purse, we left to the car.

While driving, she reminded me to be a little nice and no smart talk. I rolled my eyes and mumbled "sure." I used to love hanging out with dad, now that he remarried things changed, he would rather be with his new wife all the time. I bet he's rarely home while Jim spends his days alone.

The medium maroon two leveled house came into view, arriving around 6:45pm. Dad was not the kind of guy that's extravagant, being a journalist he's very frugal because of bills. 'As long as you have a roof over your head, you will be fed and dressed,' he would tell us.

I came out the car and was greeted by Jim, running out with open arms to me for a hug. After the custody battle, Jim lived with dad and I stay with mom. The other half had been split on weekend visits or dinners. "It's so awesome that you're here," said Jim excitedly.

"You too, little bro. You didn't even give me a chance to ring the doorbell," I said squeezing his body. I missed him so much.

"I was watching through the window."

"You got taller." I reached up and roughed up his hair. Looking more and more like dad everyday.

"You still look the same," he poked my stomach playfully I pushed him lightly on the shoulder.

"Is mom in the car?"

"Yeah." Jim ran to mom's car to greet her. I laughed, it made my heart soar. It's good to see him. When I was in the institution, I called him a lot to hear his voice. Standing at the opened door was dad in a button down white shirt and black trousers, brown wrinkled eyes and neat hair. "Hi daddy," I said approaching him slowly.

"Hey sport, I've missed you," he said, grabbing me in for a hug and hugged him really tight. Breaking apart we gave each other warm smiles.

A beautiful raven wavy haired woman came up behind him. "This must be Jordan. It's so great to finally see you. John, you told me she was pretty but you didn't give her any justice," said Trish with a bright smile.

"Nice to meet you, too," I said my mouth in a tight line. Trish was the same height as dad, green eyes, a blue dress and black heels. Approaching me she pulled me into her chest for a hug. My arms down and eyes wide surprised at her action, I slowly raised them wrapping around her shoulders and tapped her back in a soft motion. She seemed ok. For now. I could be tolerant tonight. We broke apart, my mouth still in a straight line looking everywhere else. Jim patted my upper back I turned to him and smiled.

"Where's your mom?" Dad asked tucking his hands in his pockets.

"She's leaving," Jim answered. Turning around, he was right as mom's car peeled off on the road.

"Just like Tanya to do that," I heard dad mumble. I turned to him flaring my nose at his statement. Is he serious? I shook my head as we all entered the house, it was bigger on the inside. The ceiling's high, the chandelier hanging above the foyer. I turned my head back and forth of the space. How many rooms are in this house? I felt out of place though, poking my tongue out of the corner of my mouth. I crossed my arms over my chest. This was dad and Jim's life now.

Trish informing us that she made meatloaf, we followed her into the dining room. The table had a array of filled plates; mashed potatoes, mixed vegetables, gravy, and macaroni and cheese. A silver candelabra in the middle, my mouth opened in appreciation but knowing this was not dad's style.

Pulling out our chairs, Dad sitting next to Trish, Jim next to me.

After a prayer to bless the food, dad asked Jim to pass him the bowl of mixed vegetables. Unraveling the napkin, I placed it on my lap and started taking large amounts of food in my mouth to avoid talking, stuffing my face and eyes on my food.

"So, Jordan how was your first week of school?" asked dad. I had to swallow my food to answer. I took my glass of water drinking a big gulp.

"It was fine. Met three people out of hundreds of students." I answered.

"Anybody give you any trouble at all?"

"No."

"Were you nice?"

"I'm always nice until someone screws with me."

"I'm not saying you're a troublemaker," dad said scooping the meatloaf in his mouth.

"You implied it."

"Last time you beat someone up and almost got arrested."

"I was defending myself, what you told us to do!" She got what she deserved.

"Not with your fist." I squeezed my fork tightly. Already I was reminded of the bully, Geraldine, that used to torture me on a daily basis freshman year. I never got why she tripped me up, cut my hair and stole my gym clothes. All I knew was that she was a bitter bitch. I told mom and dad about her, they advised me to ignore her. I did, possibly gave her the benefit of the doubt to talk to her one day and become friends.

It didn't take, she became more violent. She almost put me in danger planting one banana peel in my path during lunch causing me to slip and crashing into the trash cans. A sprain on my ankle but I ignored the throbbing pain. I snapped, I thought the food on my head was gonna scramble. I knocked her out cold, she ended up in the hospital with a black eye and cited emotional trauma. I pleaded my case at how she bullied me and sprained my ankle. The school sympathized but I was still given community service, worked in the cafeteria for the rest of the year. It wasn't so bad, I got free lunch and learned more of food service. Geraldine was transferred, I haven't heard from her since then. I'm on probation until I turn 21.

I released my fingers eyes back on my food and told dad, "it won't happen again."

"With your condition, it can be able to control," Trish chimed in softly. I looked up from my plate, raising one eyebrow.

She's trying to play stepmother now? I just met her today, now she thought she knew me. I gritted my teeth, responding "Oh, you mean my anger and anxiety issues, that condition?"

"Jordan, she didn't mean anything by it. Just be chill," said Jim, rubbing my hand gently.

I relaxed at his touch, patting his leg and nibbled on some mixed vegetables.

"Is everyone enjoying the food?" asked Trish, tone shaky, everyone nodded yes, even me but I rolled my eyes.

"How did you meet my dad?" I wondered pointing to them with my fork, I wanted to know if they really loved each other.

Trish started, "it was two years ago, at the park. He was taking a stroll while I was walking my dog and bumped into each other. He asked me out for drinks, I really liked how much we had in common and the rest is history." Trish reached for dad's hand, lacing their fingers. He lifted it and kissed the back of her hand. Two years ago he was cheating on mother, his ex wife that he claimed he loved. I let out a scoffing laugh, wiping my hands off my palms.

"Wow, so love at first sight?" I asked leaning my elbows on the table feigning interest. "You could say that," she answered with a smile.

"Let me guess: he ordered his favorite bourbon, neat. Both of you got a little tipsy and y'all did the dirty," I teased while raising an eyebrow. Trish let out another shaky laugh tugging her collar, I'm loving how uncomfortable she was.

"He had a club soda and I had lemon water. Nothing happened. He doesn't drink." I scoffed.

"Are you serious? He always used to have a drink in his hand. Remember Jim?" I nudged his side, Jim's chair beside me started to shift and made a skid sound. Dad cleared his throat.

"Jordan, I haven't had a drink in a long time," he said.

I raised my glass proudly, "AA does wonders huh?" I sipped my water.

Staring daggers at me, nose open and wide. "It does," he replied. I stabbed into my food

still staring at him.

"John, honey, please. It's ok. We all have our secrets," Trish grabbing my dad's hand and squeezed it.

"No shit," I mumbled scooping more food in my mouth.

"Jordan," dad's voice raised hitting the table.

"Touchy. I'll keep my mouth shut." Using my fingers, I mimed a zipped motion closed against my lips.

Dinner was in silence and tense for the rest of the night. Trish and dad retired to the kitchen, taking our plates. I felt dad's stone glare on my back. Standing from my dining chair I saw Jim going to the living room and sat on the green and brown couch. I sat next to him, taking the remote out of his hands. He took it away, I turned to him but smiled as he flipped the channels.

"Jordan, we need to talk," dad spoke sternly.

I blew out air from my mouth, getting up and followed him inside the clean black and white kitchen.

"I guess you don't like Trish due to your rude behavior." He tucked his hands into his pockets.

"I just met her, there's not much to tell," I said crossing my arms.

"Her feelings are hurt, she's trying to get to know you."

"I thought she did since she knew about my issues. And yours. Oh wait, you're not an alcoholic." I hit my forehead in a sarcastic duh motion.

"I didn't tell her about my drinking problem, because her ex-boyfriend was an alcoholic.

An abusive one." He explained.

"If you visited more, I would be informed of your new wife who supposedly love you like you love her."

"Jordan-"

"I'm just saying. I saw you a few times and then nothing. Now she wants to think she's apart of my life this one dinner. Two years dad?! You've known her for two years!"

"I know. This is why I invited you to dinner."

"But not to your wedding."

"You were in the institution. It was a small wedding."

"I could've gotten a guest pass for the day. You were sleeping with her while mom's heart was breaking." I frowned and shook my head.

"Because you're mom and me were separated. I moved out," I sagged my shoulders shutting my eyes tight. I was so wrapped in my problems I didn't notice.

"I'm trying here, sport." He squeezed my shoulder. I skidded my shoe on the furry clean carpet.

"I can tell, dad. You've changed for the better and it's good. Ignore my stubborn ways. I'm sorry. Too." Dad wrapped his arm around my shoulder. I took a hold of his waist in a tight manner as he pressed his lips on the side of my forehead.

"Do you what to stay over for the weekend? Get to know Trish, plus Jim really missed you. As did I." He suggested. Sounded like an idea, I did miss them. I needed more time.

Thinking back to the party invite, I made up my mind to go.

"I was actually invited to a party tomorrow night, I think I might go," I said hesitanty.

"Is it chaperoned?" He asked crooking an eyebrow.

"It's possible."

"Jordan-"

"If anything bad is about to happen, I'll leave." I promised, crossing my heart and pointed to the sky. He sighed staring at me. His pupils grew as he pursued his mouth to the side, after everything that went down I deserved a little fun.

"If you can do one thing for me, I'll agree that you can go."

"What?"

"Apologize to Trish."

"I can do that." Putting my pride aside and stomaching it, I could do that.

I followed him to the living room, we spotted her on the armchair watching TV with Jim.

Her green eyes turning to me, she turned back to the screen.

I began apologizing to her, sounding as sweet as possible. I would understand if she didn't accept it. She stood on her feet stepping toward me, I was ready for whatever. She pulled me into her chest, held my arms and said thank you in my ear. I wrapped my arms around her neck tight smiling to myself. We broke apart, she said, "we have ice cream for dessert. Cookie dough. Would you like a bowl?"

"I would love some, thank you," I grinned widely.

The rest of the night went well, we shared laughs and ice cream watching The Voice together.

Mom texted me an hour later that she was coming in five minutes. I told them that I was leaving soon. Dad wanted me to come over more to reconnect and I agreed. Giving more hugs, I exited their house, mom arriving she parked in front of the driveway we left.