Nights always felt so long when Éponine couldn't sleep. No matter how warm Toulouse was or how soothing his purring could be, she couldn't bring herself to sleep for very long. After the confrontation in the Prefects' Bathroom with Emmarentia, Éponine had returned to the girls' dormitory, where she finished taking a shower. By the time she returned to her bed, Emmarentia was already tucked away in hers, appearing to be sound asleep.

Although they were not on friendly terms by any means, Éponine couldn't deny that there had been some truth to what Emmarentia had told her. Although laced with lies and manipulation made it difficult for Éponine to decipher what was said with good intentions. With Emmarentia telling her that she didn't think she had a place in either world, Éponine believed her. For so long, Emmarentia had put on the face, that she was a strong-willed girl, willing to destroy anything obstructed her happiness when in reality, she was a frightened little girl stuck between a rock and a hard place.

She, like many others, feared the consequences that would follow if they decided to stray from the protected society of purebloods. As she said, the Zabini family was not part of the Sacred Twenty-Eight, leaving them to grovel at the feet of the other families to remain accepted. Because with acceptance came privileges, ones that Emmarentia and her mother would not find in the muggle world.

But it also came with many sacrifices.

Crawling under her covers, Éponine couldn't help but think of what Emmarentia had told her about Avery and Mulciber. The two of them, being punished until they claimed they were no longer attracted to members of the same sex. But Éponine knew that no torturous spell could stop them from loving the same sex, however, it could cause them to suppress all of their true feelings and go along with doing what they were told.

Tossing and turning, all the movement in her bed disrupted Toulouse's slumber as he eventually made his way to the top of the bed where her head rested and settled down. His purring intensified as if he was trying to tell her to calm down and try to sleep. She tried several times, only to wake up with Emmarentia's voice echoing in her head or the sound of Regulus' bones cracking from the bludger incident.

"I'm going to end up going mad from lack of sleep," she muttered to herself, "I need to relax. I need to calm down. All these thoughts are going to drive me mental..."

Pushing the covers off of her body, Éponine rose from her bed and made her way to her trunk. She opened it carefully, trying to not make too much noise, not willing to disturb her dormmates as they slept. Finally, she came upon Sirius' leather jacket and grabbed it, heading back to bed. She didn't place it on, but rather held onto it, getting the faint smell of Sirius' cologne that had become so familiar from their evening motorcycle rides.

It was the closest she could get to the real thing and allowed her to eventually relax.

But as she held onto Sirius' jacket, her thoughts wandered back to Regulus, who was still up in the Hospital Wing recovering. She wondered how he was doing. If his bones had fully healed or if he was in a lot of pain. She wanted to leave the dorms and go check on him, but even as Head Girl, the professors wouldn't excuse her for being out so late past curfew.

However, one thing was clear, come first thing in the morning, she was going to talk to Regulus.

She needed answers and she needed to hear them come from him, and him only.

The morning after what felt like the longest night of his life, Regulus awoke in the Hospital Wing, with the anticipated soreness that Madam Pomfrey had discussed. No matter what direction he attempted to move in, he had to do it slowly, or he would feel each body part start to cramp. The night had been miserable because he hated sleeping on his back, but had no choice but to do so as his bones healed.

The sun was already up, and in the background, Regulus could hear Madam Pomfrey tending to other students and such. He was about to call out to her and ask for something to relieve the stiffness in his body, only to hear a very early morning greeting. He froze as soon as he heard Éponine's voice, keeping his eyes closed as he wondered why she was there.

After she and Gian left the night before, it almost felt impossible to fall asleep as Regulus could only focus on the fact that she had kissed him. Maybe it wasn't on the lips, but it didn't matter, she had touched him in a willing and non-threatening matter and that was enough for Regulus to nearly lose his mind after so long. No one, not even Éponine, could understand how much he missed her since they had stopped talking.

Yes, he was the one to blame for the length of time, as Éponine had attempted multiple times to talk with him. But it was too painful for Regulus in the beginning. Just the idea of her heading down the same path and everyone around him expressing their disappointment in her, including his parents, Regulus didn't know what to say or think. He couldn't do that anymore, he couldn't ignore her because he found it far too painful.

Despite what everyone said around him, whether it was her being a blood-traitor or a disappointment to her family, Regulus didn't want to let her go.

It would have been easier if Éponine decided she had made a mistake and was willing to come home, but she made it very clear that she had no interest in doing so. And the more she slipped away from Regulus, it opened his eyes and he was starting to see what she had been saying all along.

"Regulus?"

Éponine had reached his bed side, but he didn't dare move or speak. His eyes remained closed as he heard her pull up a chair to sit beside him, and seconds later, he could hear the loud purring of Toulouse. Éponine proceeded to grab his hand and hold it, and while he was more than pleased with the gesture, her hands were absolutely freezing.

After saying his name, Éponine didn't say anything, probably because she assumed he was asleep. Regulus dared to crack one of his eyes open in the slightest to see that she was looking down at their hands before she looked off in the distance at something Madam Pomfrey was doing. As she remained distracted, Regulus reached his other hand over to grab her other one, immediately bringing her attention back to him.

"Reg-"

"You need to start wearing gloves more often, Épi," he said softly, "your hands shouldn't be this cold."

Opening both eyes, Regulus could see Éponine looking down at him, and the first time in a long time, she was wearing a genuine smile while doing so.

"You're awake," she whispered, removing one of her hands from his hold and using it to smooth back some of his hair. "How are you feeling?"

"Sore," he admitted, " just really sore. What are you doing here?"

While the question would usually come across as blunt, Éponine could only hear curiosity in his voice.

"I came to check on you," she answered honestly, " to see how you were doing. Madam Pomfrey said it was going to be a long night of healing. But she said that you're almost back to feeling brand new. After the injuries you sustained, I think some soreness would be normal-"

"But what are you doing right here?" Regulus interrupted. "You could have easily asked Madam Pomfrey if I was alright and carried on with your day. But you're sitting here next to me...holding my hand..."

Éponine could feel a lump developing in her throat, unsure of why she felt like crying at the moment. Perhaps it was seeing Regulus lying in the Hospital Wing, or maybe it was due to feeling so overwhelmed in the recent days.

"I didn't come here to talk to Madam Pomfrey,"Éponine said, "I came here to talk to you, Regulus. I have a question that only you can answer, I think you know what it's about. Gian told me what he saw up in the air. I can sit around all day and speculate but I want to hear it come from you. Did you save Gian for me or did you save him because you wanted to save him?"

"What do you mean if I saved him for you-"

"I can't be the exception, Regulus," she told him. "I can't be the reason why you do things. You should be doing things because you believe they are the right things to do. If you're anything like Severus, who fell into the Dark Arts while still being friends with Lily, just having her as his exception, I can't support that. I-"

Suddenly, she stopped talking as Regulus grabbed both of her hands again, silencing her completely. He pulled her closer to him, enough that she was nearly out of her seat as she met his gaze.

"I caught the snitch for you," he said, "but I took the bludger for him."

"So you-"

"If I'm being completely honest with you, Éponine, I've been so confused as to what to believe as of late. Ever since I saw you that day in Flourish and Blotts, I've been trying to figure out everything. I know you don't believe me when I say everything I have done is for you, but I don't mean it in a way to guilt you. I did it to protect you-"

"Regulus, we already went over this before," Éponine shook her head, " don't you remember? Back when you thought about joining for Sirius, I told you it wasn't a good idea because it wasn't a guarantee-"

"I know it wasn't a guarantee but it was something. You joined the group that was fighting against him, it was the only way I could know that you were safe. I could hear if you were involved-"

"You could have known I was safe by being with me."

"You didn't figure out everything overnight, Éponine. You shouldn't have expected me to. I was in shock when you announced that you were just leaving everything behind. I felt like you were leaving me behind. I was hurt, the same way ...no...hurt even more that you decided to leave me behind than when Sirius left home. You decided all of this just after Christmas, and I had never seen you so happy with the exception of what happened between you and your parents. Don't you think that caused some confusion?"

"I was happy, Regulus. I was happy when I was around you and around your parents, but you don't understand everything that happened. When I learned Gian was a muggle-born, I told him he didn't belong in the beginning, but over time, I couldn't see a reason why he didn't belong. He was so sweet and innocent and it got me thinking about so much. And then, Severus found out and told Bellatrix. Over the Christmas holiday, she warned me that I needed to figure out where my loyalties lied or...or..."

Regulus could hear the hesitation in Éponine's voice after she mentioned being threatened by Bellatrix. He gripped her hand tighter, urging her to tell him what Bellatrix had said.

"What did she say to you,Épi?"

She wouldn't meet his gaze before speaking. "She told me that if I didn't make the right decision, that I would find myself alone with Ernest Nott. And no one would be able to save me, not you, not your parents...no one. It was almost enough to make me stop questioning everything around me and become that little obedient girl that my parents trained me to be. But then we got back to school and Gian was there, and then Severus showed up. I called Gian a...a....well, you know. And the amount of guilt I felt afterwards, was nothing compared to anything I have ever felt before. I hated myself for hurting him and realised I couldn't do it anymore. I didn't know what the full consequences were going to be, but I knew I couldn't follow Toujours Pur anymore."

The entire time Éponine had been telling him about Bellatrix's and Severus' involvement, threatening her and attempting to exposing Gian, he could feel anger pulsing through his body. And no matter how sore his body was, his anger would have been enough to push him out of bed and go on the warpath to find Bellatrix and Severus.

"I didn't know about all of that, I didn't know they had-"

"It doesn't matter now," she sniffed, quickly wiping her sleeve under her eyes, "it's fine. I was scared at the time, but I know I made the right decision. Neither Bellatrix nor Severus can change my mind. But I had to talk to you, Regulus. After what you did for Gian, I needed to talk to you. You took the first step in the right direction, are you willing to keep going? I can't keep holding onto false hope that maybe-"

Ignoring the screaming sensation in his body, Regulus pushed himself up in the bed, moving closer to her. His hand reached up and held the side of her face, bringing her to look at him once more.

"Give me one more chance to make things right, Éponine."

Her eyes scanned over his face for several moments quietly before she closed them and let out a small sigh, leaning her forehead against his.

"Please don't make me regret this, Regulus."

A/N:

A big thank you to cendriia for spoiling us with the image of Toulouse in a scarf and Éponine looking gorgeous!