As I'm walking along the deck, looking out into the clear ocean water with Vanessa's black Capri pants on, I notice something.
The dog.
When I came out here, he was trotting along next to me on his leash.
And now he's not.
Now he's nowhere in sight.
WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY?!
Vanessa is getting her nails done at the salon. I told her that I'd walk the dog. Of course, he can't use the restroom. I have no idea how or where he's supposed to go, but this is my vacation. Somebody else can worry about my dog's waste issues.
But that's not the point. Vanessa is already angry with me about the pants situation. If she finds out I let our dog loose on a huge cruise ship, she's gonna freak.
"Ma'am," I say to a woman tanning in her chair with a piña colada in her hand "Have you seen a large golden retriever anywhere? Answers to the name Winston?"
"Sorry, hon. I'm addicted to this Clash of Clans thing. Haven't looked up from my phone since lunch." She answered.
"Uh, thanks anyways."
Great. Where the heck could that dog be? I decided that he's a dog. He likes food. I just have to search all the restaurants. Of course, there are about 50 of them. I hope Vanessa decides to get her hair done too.
After searching every single restaurant in the place and asking at least 40 people if they've seen the dog, I figured I should just go to the salon and tell Vanessa what happened. Maybe now that she's nice and calm, she'll be ok with it.
"Vanessa," I say as soon as I make my way into the salon and see her "Have you seen-"
And there I see him.
It's my dog.
Sitting next to my wife.
Getting his nails painted.
"Hey, hon," Vanessa says to me "The salon is having a special. If 2 get their nails done, the third is half off! Come join us!"
And I thought:
Eh, why not?
So now I'm sitting in a salon getting my nails painted a dark blue (it matches my eyes) by a little Bahamian lady.
So, my day has gone pretty well.